Bundle of me

i feel alive, but barely

[aaaangel444]

[bundleofme]

A girl just like me

Her fingertops are red from her blood

Fear and horror are written all over her face

The monster that he put unwillingly inside her is gone for good

But she didn't know if she'd survive this whole disgrace

Nobody knew ofcouse, for her family she had to stay pure

So she butchered her body all alone in the dark

With illegal medicine that claimed they were the cure

What was left were the tears on her face and a dress with a red stained mark

She washed her hands until she was washing the skin from her fingers

Stil the feeling of him and the death smell stayed and lingers

She might have survived this, but there are so many others

Who are a girl just like me, and want to be more then mothers who raise unwanted childeren in the gutters

- M.

[bundleofme]

[bundleofme]

Why are people up this late?

Some are lovers between the sheets

Others are drowning in their thoughts

Some are still dancing into the night

Others are working behind those city lights

And what about all those lost souls

Wallowing in the dark

I am no different

Who knows maybe this will be my death

Oh to die from self pity

Just let me take one more breath

And i'll dissapear into the numbness

- M.

[bundleofme]

I watched as the night turned into day

The gray heavy clouds that kept the sun

From shining any warmth though the window

My pale skin shivered

But not from the cold

It was the loneliness within

That made her so anxious

She almost left my body

Because it was a hollow thing to live in

- M.

[bundleofme]

Like velvet was her skin

The touch so light

It made me believe i was just waking up

From the most amazing dream

With her voice wispering in my ear

Longing for me to come

But I never came near

Afraid when I'd open my eyes

She'd be long gone

- M.

[latibule-e-deactivated20231012]

Colleen Hoover, Confess

[bundleofme]

I want to be an accumulation of endless possebilities

- M.

[bundleofme]

[bundleofme]

My mind is making thousands of connections

In this simple brain of mine

From left to right, and right to left

They try to make me function

Like a normal person should

But they also make up the thoughts

That say that I'm no good

- M.

[bundleofme]

Rooted

Let our toes touch everything this earth has to offer Make them wet at the edge of the ocean Make them tickle between the high grass and flowers Make them wiggle between the soft desert sand Make them stand strong on the rocks of the mountains Our feet carry us everywhere we go They’re always that one step ahead And onto the next So keep on walking on this earth Because our feet love to touch the ground - M.

[bundleofme]

Here I lay with my bare back In between my little nothingness of a mess That is called life And even though there have been better days This one I survived yet again So that is deserving of a little smile on my face - M.

[bundleofme]

another you, another me

they say the silence speaks for itself but i think i’ve gone deaf because days went by without hearing your voice i became scared my ears weren’t working anymore then i realized you weren’t here like you used to be so the voice in my head started to talk again about a different time with another you, another me - M.

[bundleofme]

darkest clouds hung above my head as if they matched the thoughts i had about the the struggle and the pain and then came down all the rain - M.

[bundleofme]

“our” fcked up world

these concrete blocks all around me with all those tiny windows  where people face the world in a different angle to make it seem that the outside is just a live video you can put on your tv screen it all seems so fake to me this world where time rushes out the door we lay begging on our knees for some money and we get valuation from an online screen how did we made this place where nature becomes a rare sight to see while we leave nothing but death and trash behind  and that’s what we call true beauty we live and we die and we take and take, and take, and take, and take and we give up, give in, but we never really give back back to the earth that doesn’t belong to us and she let’s us harm her like an unhealthy relationship we fight with her, beat her up, talk her down and take anything and everything she must be having bad dreams at night lying there bruised and in tears wondering what she did wrong to deserve this slowly bleeding to death i’m so sorry my dear, -M.

[bundleofme]

She couldn't sleep

But there were no monsters under her bed

She kept them hidden inside of her head

They were fighting to get out

So every night they had her heart in their claws

And the only thing she showed

Were the silent tears rolling out

- M.

[bundleofme]

Soccer

How nice it felt

To return on a wet field

With a ball at my feet

And the goal in sight

How i missed the adrenaline

The thumping of my heart

My quick breathing

And even my sweat

After quitting for two years

I am finally back

I hope soccer missed me as much as i did miss her

Now the only thing left to do

Is get back on track

- M.