Dirges in the Dark

He/Him, 33 years old, Minneapolis, MN, USA

[burzolog]

Played perfect, filled entire board, got 400 points.

[studentofetherium]

obsessed with this emotion wheel i saw on bsky. honestly that's how it is sometimes

[aokozaki]

Thought this was AI generated for a second before recognizing common, everyday emotions like Revolfed and Bǝger.

[burzolog]

This makes me feel suʌrgen.

[sexy-people-contests-2026]

Sexy Inanimate Objects Contest Round 1

The Hubble Space Telescope

Lava lamp

Voting ended onJun 8, 2025

[burzolog]

Hubble, my beloved, why do the people not love you as I do? Do they not see you as I do? Are they not moved by you as I am? You are one of the most sublime objects wrought by human hands and intellect. This lack of appreciation for you is like a tragedy unfolding before me. You will forever be the true winner in my heart.

[mikewheelerfan2022]

Get them all to 25% (help is allowed and Tumblr better work this time)

1

2

3

4

Voting ended onMay 14, 2024

[cersei-the-truth-bombardier]

Wait a second…

W

[burzolog]

Rounding.

[indiainswiftland]

I've said it before and i'll say it again: THAT IS NOT A FUCKING METAPHOR, JOHN GREEN

[sizzlingsandwichperfection-blog]

Thanks for tagging me in this. I agree that what Gus thinks is the metaphor is not the metaphor in The Fault in Our Stars, but I do think there is nonetheless a metaphor lurking there.

In The Fault in Our Stars, Gus is indeed engaging in classic teenage attention-seeking by putting a cigarette in his mouth but not smoking it, and he justifies this by claiming it's a metaphor for his agency, for his control over what happens to him. "You put the killing thing between your teeth but don't give it the power to kill you." As if you have the power.

But of course, the reader knows this is not a good metaphor. This is not how power or agency work--you don't actually have control over what happens to you, and (as Gus eventually realizes at the very end of the novel) you don't have any say in whether you get hurt in this world.

The actual metaphor is that despite our furious attempts to establish a feeling of agency, we never actually have it. And so of course Gus is wrong when he says, "It's a metaphor." The actual metaphor is that when Gus desperately needs to express his agency over what happens to him, he's not even strong enough to buy a pack of cigarettes, let alone make a choice about whether to smoke them. That's the metaphor--Gus thinks the cigarette stands for the control individuals have over their fate; the actual metaphor is that the cigarette stands for the control we lack, for the fault that is in our stars.

[burzolog]

Authors are forever cursed by the belief that if their characters say or do something stupid it must be because the author is also stupid and unaware of their own stupidity.

[dingdongyouarewrong]

someone on my dash awhile ago, i don't remember who, described EEAAO as a 'glorified marvel movie' (or it was something similar) and i'm still thinking about it. it's a marvel movie because it has scifi in it. it's a marvel movie because it has jokes in it. it's a marvel movie because it has talking in it

[burzolog]

[burzolog]

Elon musk can eat my shit.

[theparacosmologist]

Superwholock was a competition and doctor who won

[businesshag-deactivated20160606]

I HATE how tumblr brings up your old tags as you’re typing a new tag because I really don’t!! Want to remember!!! Some of the things I’ve said on this godforsaken site!!!!

[borkyno-deactivated20160330]

tag this post with your first result you get when you type will

[criticalrolo]

what if one of the PCs is a centaur and I have to learn how to draw a goddamn horse 😭

[spoogliedoo]

this tweet fucking rules – it’s utterly incomprehensible on so many levels. 

plant-based beer? is there meat-based beer? what the fuck is meat-based beer, chuck? 

why is he thanking joe biden? is the senate majority leader not typically allowed to watch the oscars? 

why is chuck sitting so close to the tv? and in what is that, a dining chair? who watches television like this? 

[thatsoup]

That’s his computer chair

[burzolog]

"Plant-based beer" was a dunk on former Trump advisor Larry Kudlow who was ranting on his Fox Business show about a potential future where Biden's policies force people to stop eating meat. Actual quote, "OK, got that? No burgers on 4 July. No steaks on the barbecue … So get ready. You can throw back a plant-based beer with your grilled Brussels sprouts and wave your American flag."

So, Chuck Schumer does know that beer isn't made from meat, but Larry Kudlow actually apparently did not. (source)

[burzolog]

[thecyndimistuff]

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!?

[docrimesbequeer]

Explains why the ending sucked

[19b-archive-deactivated20250525]

Oh my fucking god

Why are studios so hellbent on punishing fans for engaging with their shows? This is why everyone hates the idea of subversions now. Producers think it means to surprise people even if it’s nonsensical and has no buildup. And now actual twists are getting removed because fans dare to guess them

[littlemissonewhoisall]

This is the same shit that ruined Game of Thrones

[burzolog]

This is absolutely not true. Here is the article, which now has an editor’s note attached: https://uproxx.com/tv/wandavision-fan-theory-correct-scene-changed/

Editor’s note: An earlier version of this post contained some inaccuracies about a Reed Richards/WandaVision fan theory that have since been corrected. We apologize for the errors.

I watched the entire Kevin Smith interview that is what this article was based on, and at no point did Matt ever say anything about changing anything mid-production due to what fans were saying.

[raionmimi]

Big fan of the controversy over Lola Bunny’s Space Jam 2 design now that she no longer has tits becuase now the typical crowd that complains about desexualized designs are the ones that usually hate furries, and thus have locked themselves into a dilemma if they want Lola’s furry milkers to be the hill they want to die on to own the liberals

[burzolog]

This isn’t even an accurate comparison to what Lola looked like in the original movie because the left image is fanart that was made in 2010. Nobody ever fact checks anything on the internet and it’s extremely annoying.

[memewhore]

[shoutsindwarvish]

@apocrypals this is real

[bigmammallama5]

[asimovsideburns]

EXTREME TEEN BIBLE… REAL

[turians]

Y'all are NOT READY for their shirt merch

[thotmendes]

I’d buy the “yeet pray love” shirt if it came in black tbh

[universesizedcock]

“Pick up your sword bruh”

[burzolog]

I feel like it’s worth mentioning that the real Extreme Teen Bible is actually the Extreme Teen Bible. It is an actual Bible that was published in 1999. The item in the Adventure Zone was created to make fun of it, and rightly so.

[whitepeopletwitter]

[snarkymonkeyprime]

I want to see this kid’s expression when shown an AOL log-in CD.

[burzolog]

Except "they used to send you DVDs” implies that at some point they stopped doing that, which isn’t true. dvd.netflix.com

[egberts]

at this point I wouldn't be surprised if the secret fifth season of Sherlock was real and came out tomorrow

[foxyclock]

This is how johnlock can still become canon

[demonic-mnemonic]

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

[merrrrrrrrry]

These articles are from 7 hours ago

[egberts]

THIS WAS A JOKE

[burzolog]

If Season 5 of Sherlock happens hell is real and we’re all in it.