Shitpost central

I'm just joshing ur bagels man

[catchymemes]

[buttmonke]

Who remembers dream daddy…? I’m reminiscing.

[buttmonke]

It feels like there are pebbles in the folds of my brain

[wizardarchetypes]

I’m seriously about to fucking (remembers this tweet)

LOSE MY FUCKING MARBLES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[deathtokillian]

Ideas are cooking for my pride outfit.

[buttmonke]

Period.

[buttmonke]

I love myself a cravas

[buttmonke]

We have to be sure that our ducks are in a row and our pigeons are being fucked

[wildemoth]

Gender is a performance and it’s time to play the music it’s time to light the lights it’s time to meet the muppets on the muppets show tonight

[teratomarty]

[buttmonke]

Your touch is like a magic fkin wand bro

Headache? Kiss it better and I’ll be fine

Stomach ache? Rub my tummy and I’m chillin

Back hurting? Literally trace my spine and I’m healed.

Oh shit I’m just a cat lol nvm

[cillianwilder-deactivated202408]

[buttmonke]

Being a child with anger issues is so funny to look back on because like

What was going on with my purely violent behavior towards little boys when I was a child

Drama queen much Jesus Christ grab a fucking water bottle and go sit down

Stop trying to look tough so that people will think you’re cool just let it go dude you’re like 3 feet tall

[catchymemes]

[thememedaddy]

[buttmonke]

Rp with an uninteresting fact about ur self,

I drink one black coffee every day and have since i was 12

[amygdalae]

kind of hate my stupid caustic pussy for dissolving my underwear over time but it's kind of cool, like, scientifically

[transmechanicus]

Pitcher Plant Pussy Lore

[official-pussy-posts]

Official Pussy Post

[identityarchitect]

remember, before you post, think SMART

Start discourse

Make up arguments

Ad hominem

Reading the post is for losers

Talk without thinking

[buttmonke]

i love being pretentious

“Ugh i love your outfit!”

I know 😌

“You look so good.”

I know 🤭

“I wish I had your style!”

I FUCKING KNOW IM AMAZING BITCH

[buttmonke]

working in a cafe near your house is such a funny experience

You’re rolling silverware one minute and the next you’re getting coffee for your 8th grade history teacher and his wife

You’re cleaning menus and then you see your old friend’s dad and you have to get him a fucking omelet

[buttmonke]

does anyone else keep a quote book in their notes?

In mine I just write the quote with absolutely no context no name no nothing and going through them is like my absolute favorite pastime so I’m gonna share some of my favorites in no particular order.

“SO YOU PISSED IN A PUMPKIN?”

“Winner winner chicken dinner, it was porn.”

“Hold on, soup moment.”

“You are my personal compost bin and eat my daily banana peels.”

“Call me when you have naked statues in your yard.”

“What’s a bronie? A brown pony??”

“YOU’RE THE APPENDAGE.”

“He’s spiritually Canadian.”

“Don’t question the artistic choices of Soulja Boi.”

“I’ll make it sit in the idea jacuzzi.”

“2% skin milk.”

“I announce when I have to shit, you don’t shit. We are not the same.”