Judy’s a trier, always has been, enough to make it her calling.
But besides trying, she realizes that there’s plenty of learning she has to do as well.
(And to be honest? Nick does need this.)
Judy’s a trier, always has been, enough to make it her calling.
But besides trying, she realizes that there’s plenty of learning she has to do as well.
In the safety of the Burrows – an impulsive decision of her wanting to bring her partner home really – she finally has the space to breathe.
Because, sweet cheese and crackers, when she said twenty-four hours, she didn’t literally mean it. This was even less time than their first big case! She was always an overachiever, and with both her and Nick together, maybe it really wasn’t a surprise for explosions to be involved.
Twenty-four hours to be framed, to be on the run, to be separated, to be imprisoned, to die (God, she almost died), to think Nick would die (Even worse, Nick, Nick almost died), with all that to process, she could be forgiven for just wanting to turn off her mind and to just rest. Even superhero bunny cops needed to recharge.
But like she said, she was trying to learn. And that meant listening, which was infinitely harder when your partner’s language tended to be the non-verbal kind. But Judy wants to try and learn, the way she’s now just fully realizing, how much Nick is attuned to her own cues.
A slight tapping of her paw, and lo and behold, a pawpsicle from out of nowhere. Droopy ears, and just there, carrot soda or maybe carrot tea.
Judy’s learning that it’s not that Nick has never told her he cared. He’s practically been shouting it from the rooftops, just not with words.
So, Judy learns to look and to listen.
To the undercurrent of fatigue in his voice even as he regales her grandparents, parents and siblings with stories to make them laugh, to see how his tail would almost be sweeping the floor if not for him forcefully holding it up, and how she can’t help but notice how his sight always tracks her from the corner of his eyes, never letting up for one single moment.
Because she’s trying, she interrupts even as her heart melts at seeing all her favorite animals together, to tell her mom and dad that she’ll be bringing Nick up to her room. To her mind, it only made sense as it was the only bed that was big enough to fit his lanky frame, and even then, he’d have to bend to get comfortable.
It’s a mark of how tired she was that she doesn’t even think to question why her parents don’t say anything, just smiles knowingly, at Nick’s cheery salute, “Have a good night, Mr. and Mrs. H.”
It’s not awkward, even if belatedly Judy thinks that it should be.
“So this is your place, huh, Carrots? Guess, it’s only fair since I showed you mine.” The tone is teasing as is usual for her fox, but because she’s looking, really looking this time, she notices how his gaze lands softly on all her old ZPD posters plastered all over her childhood bedroom walls.
Deciding to just get right into it, she tugs on his shirt, “Hey, Nick?”
It only takes a slight pressure, uncharacteristic of her really, but even without her yanking on his tie, without fail he turns down to meet his gaze with hers, “Hmm?”
Everything seems so delicate in the twilight, even her voice, as she asks, “What do you need?”
And isn’t that the kicker.
This isn’t surprising, it’s typical Carrots. She always wants to help everyone.
But maybe it’s because he’s tired, exhausted really (God, he almost lost her) that he isn’t really Slick Nick, isn’t as smooth and polished as he would like, with his rougher edges more apparent.
He feels raw in a way, and choked up, almost like he was back on that wall when he thought he almost –
It’s just that, this is typical Judy.
But this isn’t typical Nick.
Ever since he was twelve, he got used to taking care of himself, that maybe he’s already forgotten how to ask for help.
But this is what this whole partner thing is all about, right?
To tear down walls and unlearn habits, all in the goal of making space and a home for someone else right there in your ribcage.
“You know, when I asked what you needed, I wanted to help you. But this kinda feels like I’m getting the better end of the deal.”
There’s no reason for them to whisper, with only the both of them in her room like this. With the lights turned down low, with only the moon as her guide, it’s a bit difficult for Judy to see Nick clearly. Not that she’d have any trouble locating him, with how curled up around her he was, almost like a neck pillow, with his tail warmly blanketing her legs, an open parenthesis to a period.
He’s resting his head on his forepaws, while his eyes are closed. If he opened them, he’d see her face right in front of his. She could almost believe that he was already asleep if not for the comforting beat emanating from him, almost like a purr. Surrounded as she is, it’s transmitted to her and all she feels is comfortable, and calm (safe, her sleepy mind supplies). As tempted as she is to finally drift off, she already vowed to be a better partner so she’d stay awake until Nick could rest.
“Agree to disagree,” he murmurs sleepily.
But once Judy latches onto something, she’s like a dog with a bone. “Are you really sure this is what you need?”
Recognizing that Carrots wouldn’t rest till he pressed her off switch, Nick opens his eyes to meet her own wide-eyed ones.
“Yeah, Carrots. It’s a…pack thing. Besides giving me white hairs, you’ve given me enough nightmares to last a lifetime with all those close calls. Just need to literally and physically feel you’re with me for my brain to stop ringing alarm bells every moment you so much as go to a room where I can’t see you.”
It’s the truth. It really is a pack thing. Nick doesn’t stop (figuratively pulls on the breaks in his brain even) to think that another word would be more fitting (something synonymous with partners, but he’s no thesaurus so he can’t say for sure).
Judy’s his packmate, his pack mate (with a space in the middle).
C’mon, brain. You had only one job.
He means Carrots is his soulmate. There that’s better.
Okay, he must be getting delirious. And spacey too, with how long he’s left his ma-, no his partner, hanging.
He makes the mistake of refocusing only to see the stricken look in those violet eyes.
He could almost smack himself, if not for the desire to stay in this cozy position winning out. He didn’t mean to make her feel guilty.
Partially to distract her, he asks, “What about you? Is this okay?”
Somehow it works, as she’s quick to reassure him, “Of course it is. I told you too. You’re my fluffle. You’re practically obligated to join the bunny cuddle pile now.”
“As tempting as that sounds…”, he says in a tone making it clear that would be the last thing he’d ever want to do, with a corresponding eye roll, of course, from his serious partner.
He draws even nearer, curling around her even more, with their foreheads close to touching. “The thing is,” he drawls, “You’re already helping plenty.” He makes sure to smirk; sure, she’d get the reference.
“I’m fine doing my fluffle duties with just you. You’re more than enough for me, Carrots. I don’t know if I could handle more. As it is, I have to bring my A-game just to keep up.”
Part of him worries that he’s being too much, even with Judy giving her full permission. It’s just, there were so many times he’d felt her slip out of his grasp. He’s not even in the mindset of savoring this rare opportunity, when all his mind is filled with is fear, and wanting to reassure her, as well as himself.
(she’s here. she’s safe. she’s here. she’s safe.)
A fox’s night vision is excellent, but he still scrunches his eyes closed, comforted in the fact that Judy can’t see as well in the dark. He’s heard it said that scent is a marker, and he couldn’t agree more. Every animal’s scent is uniquely their own, and to lose this – violets and blueberries, grass and ink and sunshine – is a world he can’t imagine living in.
Maybe he would’ve been fine before, way before all this, but home isn’t just a bachelor pad under an elephant gym anymore, it’s a bunny with a too-big heart and hopeful eyes, soft as fluff in her heart, but tough as diamonds everywhere else. She’s so soft it scares him sometimes (a lot of times).
Huh, who knew. Maybe foxes were solitary because otherwise how could they deal with all of this emotion (blegh) on a regular basis. But he wouldn’t trade it, her, his place beside her, all of this is everything, even with the risk of white hairs and scratches, he’d take all the pain, for this feeling of peace every single time.
Maybe for a rabbit, they take more care with sounds because of their sensitivity. But for a fox, it’s not enough for him to just see her. In its entirety, he has to reassure himself with all of his senses that she’s really okay. Passing his muzzle over her head, closing the loop around her with his tail, almost smothering her, even as he gently, but firmly curls his paw around her shoulder, with the other around her waist.
With this, he could finally rest.
As Judy notices Nick’s brows relax under the low light of the moon, part of her also wants to finally let go and start to drift into the ether like him, while another part continues to ponder.
She remembers how Chief Bogo had held her back.
“Go on, Wilde. You’ll have your partner back soon enough.” He learned his lesson so he didn’t wait for the snarky reply sure to come before he slammed the door on the irritating fox’s face.
He snorts. “Why do I even bother saying that when you know as well as I do that he’ll just keep waiting outside till you come out.”
Judy felt small in a way that she hadn’t for a long time. “What did you want to talk to me about, Chief?” What did you have to talk to me about that you couldn’t with Nick here.
Bogo sighed, already feeling the incoming headache. “Hopps, you might think that I have a low opinion of Wilde.”
Judy wasn’t sure if she was expected to protest here.
“And while that’s mostly the case, it’s not because I think he’s a shifty fox,” he makes sure to say already seeing the indignation on the bunny officer’s face, ready to speak up for her partner.
“Orange dog is accurate, he’s loyal as they come,” Judy brightens, before he says right after, “But not to the ZPD.”
“Chief, I don’t know what anyone has been saying, but Nick wouldn’t do anything to hurt the force!”
“I’ll stop you there, Hopps. By no means am I saying that Wilde is a bad officer. I recognize that like you, he graduated at the top of his class. That is no easy feat considering his age compared to his peers. Again, I recognize that that took dedication, and intense motivation, passion even,” Bogo raised a hoof to stop her before she could interrupt, “But not the same passion you have toward the service. I am not saying that is a bad thing. It doesn’t discredit you as partners that your reasons for joining the ZPD are different.”
“The point I’m trying to make, Hopps,” he sighs, letting the worry seep into his voice, “is that when I said that you were an example, I don’t just mean for bunnies. You’re a beacon of light for others as well. I want you to think about that.”
“And that is the reason why I want you and Wilde to go to Partner’s Counselling. No matter what you may think, I don’t want Precinct One to lose its ‘Dream Team’.”
If she had been a wiser bunny then, Judy would have realized what Bogo was trying to say. As it is, she had only been focused on the perceived slight against her partner. What Judy decided to take away from the conversation was that Bogo thought Nick wasn’t as dedicated to the ZPD as she and he was, and in her dumb bunny mind, she was all set to prove him wrong, just he wait.
How many hours and life-changing experiences later, she finally gets it. What Bogo meant, what Nick has been shouting in his own way.
Only now did she finally decide to listen.
She draws closer this time, first touching her twitchy nose to his much bigger black one. It tickles, how she feels it snuffle against hers with Nick’s slight inhales and exhales, but he doesn’t move a muscle. Then her forehead to his while she curls her paws on either side of his muzzle, as she slowly closes her eyes. This time she holds the position and doesn’t move, content to just lie there and exist with him.
“I’m sorry,” she whispers, and as close as they are, she’s sure he hears her, he always does, patient and waiting with arms wide open, a place to return to after she’s done making the world a better place.
She always knew at the back of her mind, but maybe it’s only now that she’s really learning that in her rush to have Nick right beside her, she didn’t realize that he always took pace a half-step behind to be ready to catch her when she falls.
(That she’d martyr herself for the world, for everyone to have a home, to have a hearth to return to, but that Nick would martyr himself for her, to make sure she had a safe space to come back to once all her battles were fought and all her victories were won.)
Maybe she didn’t have to drag him to her side. Maybe she could fall back too, or maybe they could meet in the middle just like this. A slight movement, as she breathes out a contented sigh.
She feels it too when Nick nuzzles back, drawing ever so slowly downward and ruffling the fur between her brows as if to smoothen the worry lines there, while he bops her under the chin with his nose, “Oh, you bunnies, always so emotional.”
She smiles as he smirks, and they fall asleep just like that, finally, finally able to rest.
(They don’t stir when her parents drop by quietly, nor notice the click of a shutter, as they slept on, oblivious to everything else outside of one small bed. Together, in their own little world, what mattered was that they were there for each other. And for the both of them, that was more than enough.)
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