caden

he/him 22 🏳️‍⚧️♿️🏳️‍🌈

[cadennnnnnnnn]

i just realized how much weather-based planning i do as a result of being chronically ill. i’m super sensitive to any sort of temperature changes and as we all know rain and humidity aren’t great for joint pain.

this week we’ve been in a heatwave with a high of 85 on wednesday. too hot. not fun. i felt woozy and nauseous and fatigued. so i slept a lot, made sure i was at home as much as possible and spent $20 on a shitty fan because i can’t afford to run the AC yet.

and then, for three nights this week, thunderstorms. not only do i get the pleasure of a terrified cat (and anxious husband) i’ve got increased joint pain and if the universe really hates me, a migraine. i had two papers due this week and could only get one done on time because it hurt my hands too much to type and it hurt my head too much to stare at a screen.

but sometimes you get a day like today. upper 60’s and sunny. as long as i’ve got my sunglasses (that i need every time i leave the house now, thanks to my brand new near daily migraines! more on that later) i can handle that. nothing really effecting my pain levels and not so warm that it makes me feel ill. although i do sweat a lot.

good things don’t last forever though. tonight starts rain and a rather significant temperature drop for the next few days. i can already feel my joints starting to hurt and i know i can expect worsened migraine symptoms. i have work tomorrow and it’s going to suck. i’m charging my penjamin because i know i’ll need extra pain relief past what otc meds can provide. plus i’ve got to pregame for monday.

so yeah. i check the weather a lot because it really determines the kind of day i’m going to have and the symptoms i have to prepare for. now if you’ll excuse me, i’m off to set out my compression gloves so i remember them tomorrow.

[fat-transmasc-experience]

fat tboys everywhere i love you. never lose weight to satisfy the expectations of people who shouldn't mean anything to you. take up space. you deserve to take up space

[cadennnnnnnnn]

hi all, little life update since it’s been a while. i’ll start with the good things i guess haha. i’m on break from school and it’s been a pretty busy summer as my fiancé had top surgery in june and i was his caretaker. he’s healing great and looks amazing, but taking care of him was definitely harder on me than i expected. i’ve also been working a lot to try and save for the upcoming semester. i have a lot of disability related work stories to tell so i might make a post on that soon.

we’re going up to vermont next week to see lucy dacus, and we’re both super excited! we actually considered eloping while there since lucy is marrying people at her shows, but decided against it because we want a fall elopement instead. my birthday is later this month so we’ll be celebrating that and our 6th anniversary, which is in two weeks.

as for my health, it’s been difficult. i’ve been experiencing more new symptoms (foot drop, dizziness, balance issues, increased pain and more subluxations) that are making me really question if fibromyalgia is the only thing going on. honestly, i doubt it but i’m not sure how to go about asking for second opinions without seeming like i’m diagnosis shopping or something. i don’t doubt that i have fibro, as a lot of my symptoms line up perfectly, but there seems to be something else under the surface.

i’m relying on my crutch every time i leave the house now and a lot of the time in the house. i would use two but my right wrist is extremely unstable and can’t do any weight bearing. because of this, i purchased a wheelchair for longer outings. it took a lot of mentally fighting myself that i deserved to do this for myself, even if it’s “just fibro.” i’ve been using it on and off for about two weeks now and while it’s difficult due to being a hospital chair so my partner has to push me a lot, i’ve been able to enjoy outings again. previously my life was just work and home due to my pain levels and weird new symptoms. i think i’ll make a separate post about the experience of becoming a part time wheelchair user, how i’ve been coping, and the modifications i’m making to my chair to make it usable for me.

anyways, that’s all i’ll type out now, as if anyone reads this far haha. i’ll post again soon.

[artsybi]

heyyyyy reminder for other cane users.

don't forget that cane tips need to be replaced.

i've been using my cane for almost two years on a near daily basis and i JUST switched out the tip and

[image IDs in alt text]

the new tip versus the old tip. i'm not sure how clear it is but, YEAH, there's like. half a millimeter of tread left on the old tip, if that

the replacement was LITERALLY 2 dollars. i bought two to justify the four dollar shipping but. TWO BUCKS.

i had noticed that i was having slipping issues on linoleum recently, but i did not realize how bad the issue had gotten until the new tips came so. PLEASE check your cane treads and if they're notably worn out PLEASE get yourself a new tip they're SO cheap and the grip i get on the new one is INSANE

please don't forget to replace your cane tips!

[cadennnnnnnnn]

also you have to change them more during different parts of the year! where i’m at we get lots of snow and ice which means rock salt, which absolutely destroys your tips. i had to change mine after a month during the snowiest part of the winter

[arsonicpossum]

I wish more abled&healthy people would understand that my mandatory rest time is not the same as free time

[cadennnnnnnnn]

other disabled people, what do you do for an afterschool job? not having one isn’t rly an option for me at the moment because my family and fiancé can’t afford to support me and i need something that won’t be too physically demanding. but most jobs that are compatible with a college student schedule are not compatible with my physical limitations. i worked retail full time for three years and know i can’t do that anymore, so what even is there? idk what to even look for

[wizardarchetypes]

Aaron Wheelz

[animefreaksfall-in]

[blackeyed-seas]

@pestisly

[cadennnnnnnnn]

lil irl pic for the feed ☀️

today was the first 60+ degree day in new york and i’m loving it. i’m super temperature sensitive so this is in the sweet spot for me. if it’s too hot i’m prone to fainting and other heat related symptoms, and if it’s too cold my pain levels skyrocket. but these early spring days? perfect.

i was able to go out into the woods for a bit and it felt great. before my disability got this bad i was an avid hiker and i spent as much time outside as i could, so it’s my goal to get back to that.

anyways, general life update i guess? i’m learning to cope with my recent fibromyalgia diagnosis. i guess it feels good to have answers, even if that answer was basically “well, guess you’re just gonna be in pain forever.” i’ve been making an effort to do light exercises and i’ve made a lot of dietary changes to help with my symptoms but it hasn’t helped me yet. i’m hoping to get the funds to start PT and i’m also supposed to be seeing an orthopedic doc about what might be a deformity in my knees causing them to hyperextend. so. i’ve got a general idea of what i’m gonna do, i guess. in the meantime though, i’m gonna keep “gardening” to manage the bulk of my symptoms, lol. 🍃🍃

[justabunny]

another protest, another sign

[fibro-memes]

[lun-rk800]

‘Free Luigi’ billboard has gone up in lower Manhattan the evening before his next court appearance.

[thecowgirlwitch]

Why is it?? That I can go through the whole day feeling fine and dandy but the second I lay down for bed impending doom settles on me?

[baylone]

[existentialterror]

🤔 a compelling model

[chronic-melon]

Reblog if you understand that disability is not a monolith and two people with the same disability do not have identical experiences ✨

[noah-wyles]

come on americans, help a girl out

[calugaritsa]

If you're a disabled young person, you've most likely been hit with the "pfft you think you're in pain now? Just wait til you're my age" bullshit from older people at least once. Everyone talks about how invalidating it is

But I haven't seen anybody mention how it's terrifying, too. Yes, I know health deteriorates with age. I know that old age is a disability unto itself. I know that the healthiest person alive will start getting aches and pains past the age of 40 and may even need mobility aids

I know all this stuff. And it always makes me think "yeah, if I can't walk without joint pain even while using mobility aids AT AGE 21, how painful will life be for me at the age where it gets painful for everyone?"

And it's hard not to feel like I'm doomed, y'know? Where most people get a period of health that they wish they appreciated more when they start to lose it, my starting point was a body that doesn't work properly and it's only gonna get worse from there. It's worse every fucking year.

TLDR stop telling disabled young people that their pain will only get worse to the point of being unimaginable as they age, WE FUCKING KNOW

[cadennnnnnnnn]

i got a diagnosis today.

fibromyalgia with hypermobility (but not enough to be considered EDS) and a possible deformity in my knees that they think is causing an abnormal gait and the dislocations. chronic fatigue was also mentioned but i’ll be having a sleep study to see if it could be an issue with that first. i’ve been referred to physical therapy, aquatic therapy, and an orthopedic doctor as well.

i should be happy to have a diagnosis but in reality i’m just tired. i’ve seen the stigma about fibromyalgia not being a “real illness” and i’ve also seen first hand how much it can affect someone. i’m not sure if i’ll be able to afford all of the PT they want me to do and i’m worried i still won’t be taken seriously.

i guess i’m just going to have to take some time to reflect on it. i’m thankful to finally have some answers but i have a lot of questions now too.

[softgritspoonie]

[cadennnnnnnnn]

there’s definitely things that i just straight up cannot do but there’s so many things that i shouldn’t do if i want any chance of functioning for a week