not active

i rb stuff for later reference here. main: callairo

[callla]

MOVED TO @callairo

don’t see the point of having two blogs anymore so!!

[callla]

just gonna use this account to reblog stuff i wanna save for later

[leathery-wings-art]

“I cannot conceive of a universe without you in it.”

[unregisteredcat]

Did a small #tutorial for class on “How to Improve Storytelling in Panel Layouts”! Thought it might help some peepz around here!

[sendme-2hell]

The Lost Girls of Camp Forevermore - Kim Fu

Summary: A group of young girls at sleepaway camp get stranded in the woods by themselves in Canada (sound familiar?). The narrative alternates between what happened in the woods, and a vignette from each girl in their adult life.

Yellowjackets connection: This book is so spiritually similar to Yellowjackets it’s wild. The way that we see what happened in the woods and flash forward to the adults and how it affected them. The way that it’s partially about the viciousness that comes out when girls are left alone. The way that hierarchies break down in the woods. I find myself thinking about this book while watching Yellowjackets.

Is it queer?: only a very little with one character in her adult life

My Brilliant Friend - Elena Ferrante

Summary: Elena and Lila are two intelligent girls growing up in poverty in 1950’s Naples. They have an obsessive and competitive relationship. Elena is able to get an education when Lila is not, and their paths diverge here. The entire four-part book series follows their relationship and distinct lives into late adulthood.

Yellowjackets Connection: My Brilliant Friend is about a lot more than just female friendship, class differences foremost. But obsessive homoerotic female friendships and their complications are front and center. The Neapolitan series follows Elena and Lila as they grow into adults and have their own children, so it shows young women and the adults they grow into. Also has themes of trauma, unreliable narrators, patriarchy, jealousy, ambitious women. 

If you follow my tumblr you know I will connect anything to MBF but Yellowjackets writers did it for me in the show. They literally said Shauna/Jackie = Elena/Lila. If you don’t remember, this is when adult Shauna has dinner with Jackie’s mom who says she’s reading MBF and that the girls in the book remind her so much of Shauna and Jackie. She meant it as an insult to Shauna but it really is a great comparison. Especially since Lila and Elena def had something vaguely fruity going on (but also for other, spoilery reasons). Elena Ferrante is pretty much the go-to when it comes to writing about complicated female friendships so it is not a surprise that they reference it in the show. If you are obsessed with the Shauna/Jackie “friendship” this book series is for you! 

Is it queer? if you consider Jackie and Shauna’s relationship to be queer then yes. There is a lot of subtext and in the later books a little more than subtext. 

Cat’s Eye - Margaret Atwood

Summary: A painter returns to where she grew up and memories that she blocked out of a traumatic childhood friendship resurface.

Yellowjackets connection: Women thinking about their traumatic friendships! And how these affected them going forward in life. The girls in this are a little younger than Yellowjackets girls but I think it is still a foundational text about traumatic female friendships and unreliable narrators. I am absolutely a Margaret Atwood apologist so don’t come for me (or do. I love messages in my inbox)

Is it queer?: no ):

Big Swiss - Jen Beagin

Summary: Greta is a transcriber for a sex therapist where she learns all sorts of intimate details of his clients. She becomes obsessed with a client and even starts a sexual relationship with her! She does not disclose her prior knowledge of this woman so things get messy. 

Fun fact for Killing Eve fans: It is going to be made into a series starring Jodie Comer!

Yellowjackets connection: This is the only book on this list that doesn’t really flash between old and young versions of a character (a bit at the end). Yet I think it deserves to be on this list because messy queer women and obsession and mental illness. Also now that I am thinking about it actually the main character does think about her childhood in the woods a bit…

Is it queer?: The main relationship is between two women and they have a lot of sex. So, yes!

Trust Exercise - Susan Choi

Summary: Don’t want to spoil any of the big reveals but it’s vaguely about highschool  theatre kids and their unhealthy dynamic with their abusive theatre teacher. Trigger warnings for statutory rape and general predatory behavior.

Yellowjackets connection: The reason I put this on my list is because it is about women in high school going through trauma and their adult selves dealing with it. It is about the stories they tell themselves to cope. It is about unreliable narrators. It is about narrative and truth and figuring out what actually happened. The book will not tell you directly, you have to discover it yourself (or read a review that explains it).

Is it queer? no ):

[papenathys]

If I may add:

Sawkill Girls - Claire Legrand

Summary: When girls start disappearing in the sleepy woodsy island town of Sawkill, three young women must come together to find out the sinister truths behind the island’s history. This one is straight up horror thriller, and has some dark ritual and demonic stuff.

Yellowjackets connection: While the genres are not similar, the atmospherics of both are VERY similar- eerie woods, almost occult-like sightings, small towns, disappearing girls, maybe even cults. There is a primary relationship between three female characters, each with specific familial backstories and personal trauma, and their dynamics are not forced or saccharine sweet like most YA books. Lots of commentary upon violence and girlhood. Plus, there is a creepy party scene in the woods.

Is it queer? Yes, there is a central sapphic, very angsty relationship among two of the mains, with a plot relevant sex scene. And there is an asexual lead character.

Wilder Girls- Rory Power

Summary: A deadly virus breaks out afflicting the students of an all girls boarding school on Raxter Island. The virus, called Tox, creates mutations like extra bones, gills, scales, etc on every girl and affects the flora and fauna on the island. Now, they must hunt and forage if they are to survive in the heavily forested island, surrounded by choppy waters and exposed to sinister creatures.

Yellowjackets connection: It is a survivalist horror/thriller story focusing on young girls from the same school. It takes place in densely wooded settings with *SPOILER* bear attacks and other similar situations like running out of food, violent infighting, learning to use guns and hierarchies within the survivors. There is the whole plotline of breaking off from the group and trying to escape. I cannot spoil much else but it’s very close to Yellowjackets in a sense.

Is it queer? Yes, two lead characters are in a sapphic relationship, one of them also has a very homoerotic relationship with her best friend. There are other side sapphic couples.

[mercymornsimpathizer]

Ooooo I also have recommendations!

Dare Me by Megan Abbott

Summary: Addy and Beth are cheerleaders and, theoretically, best friends. In a toxic way! Their relationship is put to test by their new cheer coach, who is weird and creepy but also young and hot! Murder happens! There’s also a TV show, which I really liked but it got canceled before the story finished.

Yellowjackets connection: We’ve got homoerotic teenage friendships. We’ve got competitive sports. We’ve got murder and maiming (but no cannibalism, sorry!). What more can I say.

Is it queer? Not textually, but boy howdy subtextually.

(I picked this one because it’s the most yellojackets-y, but literally all of Megan Abbott’s stuff is about messed up female friendships. If you support women’s wrongs, you will like her stuff!)

The Secret Place by Tana French

Summary: A detective is sent to an all-girls Irish boarding school to investigate the murder of a teenage boy. Four roommates become the prime suspects.

Yellowjackets connection: Once again: murder! girls who are best friends! But also: magic?? mental illness?? the trauma of growing up?¿??

Is it queer? No, sorry!

The Girls of No Return by Erin Saldin

Summary: You know that thing where parents send their supposedly “troubled” kids to “wilderness therapy”, AKA child abuse (but in the woods this time)? Yeah, this is about that! Girls of No Return follows one girl through her time at the Alice Marshall “School”, an alternative therapy program in the Idaho wilderness.

Yellowjackets connection: Girls! Friendships! Rivalries! I feel like a broken record here. But also: the wilderness! The school is essentially a summer camp in the Idaho mountains, and the girls are forced to go on an unsupervised camping trip every year. Basically what the situation in yellojackets, but on purpose!

Is it queer? Yes, finally!

[drawingden]

Arm Anatomy Studies by Fakhear

Support the artist and check out their Etsy storefront!

[2soulscollide]

extensive list of character traits

hello hello, it's me! here's an extensive list of traits. note: if you're developing a character, check out this free workbook which has a complete character sheet :D

good character traits:

understanding

courageous

tenacious

resourceful

confident

diligent

persevering

empathetic

caring

respectful

patient

dependable

trustworthy

adaptable

charismatic

creative

innovative

encouraging

gracious

forgiving

generous

inquisitive

knowledgeable

modest

noble

optimistic

passionate

practical

principled

reliable

self-disciplined

selfless

strong-willed

thoughtful

wise

assertive

bold

decisive

dignified

disciplined

enthusiastic

faithful

friendly

humorous

imaginative

insightful

intuitive

open-minded

persuasive

practical

proactive

rational

self-confident

self-sufficient

sensible

sympathetic

tactful

team player

trusting

unassuming

visionary

well-rounded

bad character traits:

self-centered

rude

disrespectful

impulsive

greedy

arrogant

dishonest

manipulative

lazy

stubborn

moody

pessimistic

judgmental

aggressive

reckless

inconsiderate

paranoid

insecure

materialistic

irrational

vengeful

deceitful

disloyal

boastful

closed-minded

condescending

impatient

intolerant

narcissistic

obsessive

possessive

short-tempered

sneaky

suspicious

unpredictable

unreliable

wasteful

weak-willed

withdrawn

agonizing

cynical

possessive

aloof

intimidating

sadistic

bitter

passive-aggressive

evasive

procrastinating

irritable

dismissive

disrespectful

confrontational

overbearing

domineering

pompous

biased

inflexible

impetuous

misanthropic

overcritical

arrogant

hope this was useful! have a nice day <3

[bruciemilf]

Did I daydream this, or was there a website for writers with like. A ridiculous quantity of descriptive aid. Like I remember clicking on " inside a cinema " or something like that. Then, BAM. Here's a list of smell and sounds. I can't remember it for the life of me, but if someone else can, help a bitch out <3

[bruciemilf]

I FOUND IT BITCHES

[dramono]

This is going to save me so much trouble in the future.

[discoasphodel13]

Hey so it's come to my attention that the Creators of Disco Elysium want you to share the game and not give the company who took over and fired them (illegally)?) any profits off of their ideas and work, and I originally joined tumblr 2 weeks ago when that post was going around about the Steam sale and how you should [Skull and Crossbones flag] it instead.

So.

in light of that.

Check the replies/notes of this post :)

I was informed that posts containing links in them aren't findable in the search so i'll just.... drop a link in a seperate reboot :)

first things first though, copy this key:

q4-EJ9G2DV7MYYI-Vs0KdQ

[discoasphodel13]

here's the edited version with the captal YY in the key above!

2326 files and 29 subfolders

and also the Google drive link :

[fallout-lou-begas]

[slayingfiction]

Questions to ask your alpha/beta readers

I thought I would put together a master list of all the questions to ask your alpha and beta reader to help you improve your story.

You can choose to ask questions every chapter, every few chapters or after the whole book. This list of questions will be more generic and all encompassing for you to tailor to your needs.

Reminder: Beta readers typically receive a completed and polished version of your story. They give feedback on any last improvements based on the reader’s perspective. Alpha readers read your story or manuscript before it’s completed, usually a rough draft. Alpha readers are best if they also have some writing experience to give reader and writer feedback.

Choose some of the following questions to ask your readers:

Start:

When did you first feel the story was truly starting?

Do you like how the story started? If not, why?

Do you find characters were introduced slow enough to learn them all?

Did you find settings, different languages, and cultural differences were introduced slowly enough to not be confusing or overwhelming?

Were there any moments you found yourself going back over old exposition just to understand what was happening?

When, if at all, did you find yourself being pulled into the book?

Did the first sentence grab your attention?

Did the first few pages draw you into the story?

Did you find the opening paragraph/page interesting enough to continue reading?

Characters:

What do you like about the MC? What don’t you like? Can you name at least one relatable trait between yourself and the MC?

How did you feel about the character(s)’s growth from the start to finish of the story? Did you find there was enough? Was it believable?

Are the MC’s motivations and goals clear and strong enough?

Did you feel the MC’s fears, hopes, excitement, passions, etc.?

Did you get confused between the characters?

Were the characters believable?

Are there any characters you wish were more interesting? Why and how?

Do you feel each supporting character had their own motivations and contributed to the plot?

Are there any characters that seem cliché, underdeveloped, or stereotypical? If so, why?

Were the character relationships believable?

Did the romantic relationships build naturally, or did it feel forced?

Are there any character names that were too difficult to read or sounded too similar to others?

Were there any parts where the characters seemed to be acting out of character?

Who was your favorite character?

Which character, if any, did you wish was more present?

Which character do you care for the least?

What are your thoughts/feelings on the MC’s character arc?

Do you feel like the antagonists and/or villain is just as fleshed out and relatable as the MC?

If you had to remove one character, who would it be, and why?

Which character would you like to meet, and why?

Did you hope or dread any character relationships?

Are there any characters you found annoying and frustrating?

What are your general thoughts and feelings about the MC or supporting characters?

Which character did you find least developed?

Plot:

Which moments in the book did you find the most suspenseful?

Were there any moments in the book you found boring, lagging, or uneventful and unnecessary?

Did you find the pacing to suit the story well? Are there any areas you found moved too fast or too slow?

Was there ever a time you felt like you weren’t excited or intrigued enough to want to continue?

Did you find any plot holes? Any discrepancies in timeline, characters, descriptions, or other details?

Were there any scenes you found did not further the plot at all?

Are there any scenes or events you found to be too long or too short?

Did you find all explanations and revelations came out naturally and at appropriate times?

What was your favourite scene in the book? Why?

What was your least favourite scene in the book? Why?

Are there any chapters you found lacked conflict?

Did the action scenes make sense as you read them? Did you understand how they came to that action scene (or did they feel random)?

Where there any moments or scenes that made you feel emotional? Happy, sad, cringy and disgusted, etc.

Do you find the plot moved logically and naturally between scenes and chapters?

Are there any moments you felt detached or pulled out of the story? When and why?

Are there any events or scenes you found confusing? Either what was happening or how the characters came to that point?

Where you surprised by the plot twist?

Settings:

Which setting in the book was the clearest for you to visualize? Which do you remember the best?

Did you find the setting interesting, with vivid and real description?

Were there any scenes you thought lacked description?

Were there any moments you thought there was too much exposition, or not enough?

Did you find there were moments you didn’t know where the characters were unless stated?

Do you find the culture and historical events are realistic and add depth to the story?

Is there any exposition you found unnecessary? Are there any moments you wish you had more exposition?

Did all technology and science, or magic, make sense or seem believable?

Was there ever too much or too little description?

Dialogue:

Did you find that each character had their own personal voice when speaking?

Are there times where you couldn’t figure out who was talking solely based on how they spoke?

Is there any dialogue that sounded unnatural?

Could you see what the characters were doing and where they were while talking?

Was there any dialogue that seemed to not fit well with the story?

Was there any dialogue that you thought had too much exposition or explanation?

Did you find the dialogue kept your interest?

Ending:

Did you find the ending to be satisfying and emotionally fulfilling?

Are there any questions you had left after the story ended? (Mostly for stand-alone)

What did you hate most about the ending?

Did you find the ending believable?

Did you feel the tension building to the climax?

Was the climax worth the read, or did it feel weak?

Do you feel the ending came on naturally, or did it feel forced or rushed?

Did the book feel too short or too long?

General:

Were there parts where you found yourself skimming?

Which parts of the story did you find it easy to put the book down?

At what moment did you decide you wanted to finish the book? (If not DNF)

What are some of your favourite lines/quotes from the book?

Do you have any predictions for what you think will come next? (Good for chapters or end of book)

Is there something you hope will happen?

Is there anything you hoped would happen and was sad when it didn’t?

Did you find the map and glossary helpful? Is there anything you think would be beneficial to add, such as terms or names?

Are there any moments or scenes you found ethically and socially problematic and unacceptable.

Were there any moments in the story that made you stop and think?

Were you able to identify the story themes? Did you find the themes well developed throughout the story?

Did you think about the story when you weren’t reading it? If so, what were your thoughts?

Were there times during the story where you felt description was told instead of shown?

Does this book make you feel the same as other books in the genre when reading?

Is there anything you really enjoy from this genre that you found lacking in this story?

Did you find the story kept your attention with enough action, conflict, intrigue, and tension?

Do you find the story or writing style like other books you have read?

Are there any moments you found confusing, irritating, annoying or frustrating?

Are there any moments in the story you thought, “this could/would never happen”?

Did you have any questions after reading the book?

What are your general thoughts and feelings about the story?

Is there anything you wish there was more or less of?

What do you think were the best/ strongest aspects of this book?

What do you think were the worst/ weakest aspects of this books?

How would you describe this book to a friend?

Would you recommend this story to someone?

How likely/ eager are you to read the next book in the series?

Chapter specific

On a scale from 1-5, how much did you enjoy this chapter?

On a scale from 1-5, how eager are you to read the next chapter?

What predictions do you have for the next chapter?

What do you hope will happen next?

Please keeping in mind: Don't let another writer tell you what to change or how they would write it. You are the writer, and any changes are your decision. This feedback is only to give you an idea on which areas to improve.

*Alpha and Beta readers should be readers in the same genre that you write. People who mostly read mystery will not be good a/b readers for a romance novelist, or any mismatch. If you write romance, find a/b readers who love to read romance. Otherwise, any advice they give may not be as valuable or useful as you hope.*

If you have other questions you think would be useful to ask your readers, message me or add them in the comments so our list is comprehensive.

Happy Writing!

[lady-0f-the-wood]

A very detailed character biography to help build characters. I found the original template HERE and edited it to make it more suitable for how I write, and also to add more details, such as a mental illness checklist section for myself (because it helps to know what's wrong with your characters) and other details. You may not need so many minor details for a character, but you never know if you'll end up needing an explanation for something. I'll be using this template myself so I figured I'd share it in case it can help others too. I have edited it in a way that would be more suitable for my medieval fantasy characters, so it will not list any types of modern content (such as cell phones and planes and such) Enjoy. ♡

☆ Trigger Warning - Sensitive Mental Health Details ☆

Character 1

• Character’s full name:

• Reason or meaning of name:

• Character’s nickname:

• Reason for nickname:

• Birth date/season:

Physical appearance

• Age:

• Appears how old:

• Race:

• Gender:

• Weight:

• Height:

• Body build:

• Shape of face:

• Eye color:

• Skin tone:

• Distinguishing marks:

• Predominant features:

• Hair color:

• Hair type:

• Usual hairstyle:

• Voice:

• Overall attractiveness scale:

• Physical disabilities:

• Usual fashion:

• Favorite outfit:

• Jewelry or accessories:

• Tattoos:

• Miscellaneous:

Personality

• Good personality traits:

• Bad personality traits:

• Most common mood:

• Sense of humor:

• Greatest joy in life:

• Greatest fear & why:

• What event would be most devastating:

• Most comfortable when:

• Most uncomfortable when:

• Most angry/furious when:

• Most depressed/sad when:

• Most happy/joyful when:

• Priorities:

• Life philosophy:

• Biggest wish & why:

• Character’s soft spot:

• Is this soft spot obvious to others:

• Political views:

• Greatest strength:

• Greatest vulnerability/weakness:

• Biggest regret:

• Minor regret:

• Biggest accomplishment:

• Minor accomplishment:

• Most embarrassing event & why:

• Character’s darkest secret, if any:

• Does anyone else know:

• Miscellaneous:

Goals & Dreams

• Drives/Motivations:

• Immediate goals:

• Long term goals:

• How to accomplish these goals:

• How other characters will be affected:

• Miscellaneous:

Past

• Location of birth/childhood:

• Socioeconomic status:

• Cultural traditions:

• Parents Socioeconomic ranking:

• Parents involvement:

• Type of childhood:

• Siblings/other family involvement:

• Acquaintances/friends:

• First memory:

• Most important memory & why:

• Childhood hero:

• Pets:

• Dream job:

• Education:

• Religion:

• Wealth/inheritances:

• Miscellaneous:

Present

• Current location:

• Currently living with:

• Type of residence:

• Possessions/owned assets:

• Socioeconomic ranking:

• Cultural traditions/practices:

• Religion:

• Sexual orientation:

• Occupation:

• Wealth:

• Acquaintances/friends:

• Pets:

• Miscellaneous:

Family

• Mother:

• Relationship with her:

• Father:

• Relationship with him:

• Siblings:

• Relationship with them:

• Spouse:

• Relationship with him/her:

• Children:

• Relationship with them:

• Other important family members:

Favorites

• Color:

• Food:

• Form of entertainment:

• Story:

• Mode of transportation:

• Most prized possession:

• Location/place:

• Season/weather:

• Miscellaneous:

Habits & Activities

• Hobbies:

• Training:

• Magical/special abilities:

• How he/she would spend a rainy day:

• Spending habits:

• Smokes tobacco:

• Drinks:

• Drugs/herbs:

• Activity does too much of:

• Activity does too little of:

• Extremely skilled at:

• Slightly skilled at:

• Extremely unskilled at:

• Nervous tics:

• Usual body posture:

• Mannerisms:

• Peculiarities:

• Places visited for fun/interest:

• Miscellaneous habits:

• Miscellaneous activities:

Traits, Flaws, & Mental Illness

• Optimist or pessimist:

• Introvert or extrovert:

• Daredevil or cautious:

• Logical or emotional:

• Disorderly/Messy or Methodical/Neat:

• Prefers working or relaxing:

• Confident or unsure:

• Easy to anger:

• Easily pleased:

• Accountability:

• Demanding & bossy:

• Submissive & subordinate:

• Chases power/success/glory:

• Self doubt or confidence:

• Depression:

• Anxiety:

• Paranoia:

• Hallucinations:

• Trauma:

• Personality disorder:

• PTSD:

• Obsessive compulsive:

• Talkative or quiet:

• Protective of loved ones:

• Playful or boring:

• Apologetic:

• Stable:

• Mentally/emotionally strong:

• Ambition/work ethic:

• Brave or coward:

• Miscellaneous:

Self-perception

• Feelings about himself/herself:

• One word the character would use to describe self:

• One paragraph description of how the character would describe self:

• Character considers their best personality trait:

• Character considers their worst personality trait:

• Character considers their best physical characteristic:

• Character considers their worst physical characteristic:

• Character thinks others perceive them:

• Character's aspect they would change about themself:

• Miscellaneous:

Relationships with others

• Opinion of people in general:

• Does the character hide opinions/emotions from others:

• Most hated/Biggest enemy & why:

• Most loved & why:

• Best friend(s):

• Love interest(s):

• Who to go to for advice:

• Who they're responsible for/Who they take care of:

• Who character feels shy or awkward around:

• Who character openly admires:

• Who character secretly admires:

• Most important in character’s life before story starts:

• Most important after story starts:  

• Opinion of relationships with family:

• Opinion of relationships with lovers:

• Opinion of relationships with friends:

• Treats strangers:

• Treats authority figures:

• Opinions of authority figures:

• Treats subordinates:

• Opinions of subordinates:

• Treats the opposite gender:

• Opinions of the opposite gender:

• Treats other races/cultures:

• Opinions of other races/cultures:

• Treats children:

• Opinions of children:

• Treats others with different tastes/interests/activities:

• Opinions of others with different tastes/interests/activities:

• How they treat others who admire them:

• How they treat others who love them:

• How they treat others who betray/harm/bully them:

• How they treat others who disrespect/harm others:

• How they react when someone needs their help:

• How they react when someone tries to help them:

• How they react to sexual/romantic advances:

• Opinions of sex & brothels:

• Miscellaneous:

[strausswinter]

The Secret History Translation Masterlist

i was going to put this on a spam account but then decided to put it on a public one. who knows, maybe someone will benefit from it! if i’ve made any mistakes, do let me know

à moi. l’histoire d’une de mes folies (to me. the history of one of my follies or my turn. the tale of my madness)

quod erat demonstrandum (it can be shown)

cubitum eamus? (will you sleep with me?)

consummatum est (it is done)

hoi polloi. barbaroi [the many/majority. barbarian (person who doesn’t speak greek)]

bei nacht und nebel (at night and in fog)

deprendi miserum est (it is wretched to be found out)

khairei (hello)

bakchoi (initiates)

cuniculus molestus (annoying rabbit)

arrectis auribus (attentively/ears peeled)

dormir plutôt que vivre (sleep rather than live)

dans un sommeil aussi doux que la mort (in a sleep as sweet as death)

requiescat in pace (rest in peace)

n’est-ce pas (isn’t that so)

amor vincit omnia (love conquers all)

raison d’être (reason for existence)

nihil sub sole novum (there is nothing new under the sun)

quel plaisir de vous revoir (what a great pleasure to see you again)

genis gratus, corpore glabellus, arte multiscius, et fortuna opulentus (smooth-cheeked, soft-skinned, well-educated and rich)

dénouement (outcome)

salve, amice (hello, friend)

valesne? (are you well?)

quid est rei? (what is the matter?)

benigne dicis (i thank you)

bureau de tabac (tobacco store)

Χαλεπά τά καλά (beauty is harsh)

mais, vrai, j’ai trop pleuré! (oh, truly, i have wept too much!)

les aubes sont navrantes (the dawns are heartbreaking)

hinc illae lacrimae (hence those tears)

sic oculos, sic ille manus, sic ora ferebat (such eyes, such hands, such looks)

[lyralit]

show, don't tell:

anticipation - bouncing legs - darting eyes - breathing deeply - useless / mindless tasks - eyes on the clock - checking and re-checking

frustration - grumbling - heavy footsteps - hot flush - narrowed eyes - pointing fingers - pacing / stomping

sadness - eyes filling up with tears - blinking quickly - hiccuped breaths - face turned away - red / burning cheeks - short sentences with gulps

happiness - smiling / cheeks hurting - animated - chest hurts from laughing - rapid movements - eye contact - quick speaking

boredom - complaining - sighing - grumbling - pacing - leg bouncing - picking at nails

fear - quick heartbeat - shaking / clammy hands - pinching self - tuck away - closing eyes - clenched hands

disappointment - no eye contact - hard swallow - clenched hands - tears, occasionally - mhm-hmm

tiredness - spacing out - eyes closing - nodding head absently - long sighs - no eye contact - grim smile

confidence - prolonged eye contact - appreciates instead of apologizing - active listening - shoulders back - micro reactions

[paperchits]

Hello! New fanfic writer here... would you maybe write a few suggestions for me on how to describe soft gentle kissing? 💕🙏 Thank you so much!

hi there, i'm sorry it took so much time to answer your ask :( Thank you for sending one! <3

Describing soft gentle kissing:

write about the things that occur before the kiss to build up to it- looking into each other's eyes, glancing at their lips, tucking a lock of hair behind the ear maybe, holding their face/sliding arms around their waist or neck, kissing their cheek/nose before kissing their mouth

the senses- talk about leaning in, getting at a similar height, senses being overwhelmed by each other like being only able to smell them and their cologne and nothing else in the moment. being only able to focus on their touch and being numb to every single other feeling

talk about what goes on inside- pounding heart, shaky limbs, a flurry of thoughts/no thoughts at all, head empty, heavy breathing. maybe there's a constant internal chant of a singular word or sentence like "this is it. this is it. this is it."

the actual kiss- describe the press of their mouths against each other, the gentle slide of lips, the taste of the other one, how warm it is, the bliss of merging into someone and abandoning all walls, how it feels like love concentrated in an almost unbearable second, how it's hard to stop, how nothing else matters but the gentle, sweet touch of their mouth. how if they died right after that, they'd be happy with it. the oxytocin rush <3

I hope this was helpful to you! I apologize again for keeping you hanging for so long. Good luck writing!

[kafus]

beginner’s guide to the indie web

“i miss the old internet” “we’ll never have websites like the ones from the 90s and early 2000s ever again” “i’m tired of social media but there’s nowhere to go”

HOLD ON!

personal websites and indie web development still very much exist! it may be out of the way to access and may not be the default internet experience anymore, but if you want to look and read through someone’s personally crafted site, or even make your own, you can still do it! here’s how:

use NEOCITIES! neocities has a built in search and browse tools to let you discover websites, and most importantly, lets you build your own website from scratch for free! (there are other ways to host websites for free, but neocities is a really good hub for beginners!)

need help getting started with coding your website? sadgrl online has a section on her website dedicated to providing resources for newbie webmasters!

HTML (HyperText Markup Language) and CSS (Cascading Style Sheets) are the core of what all websites are built on. many websites also use JS (JavaScript) to add interactive elements to their pages. w3schools is a useful directory of quick reference for pretty much every HTML/CSS/JS topic you can think of.

there is also this well written and lengthy guide on dragonfly cave that will put you step by step through the basics of HTML/CSS (what webpages are made from), if that’s your sort of thing!

stack overflow is every programmer’s hub for asking questions and getting help, so if you’re struggling with getting something to look how you want or can’t fix a bug, you may be able to get your answer here! you can even ask if no one’s asked the same question before.

websites like codepen and jsfiddle let you test HTML/CSS/JS in your browser as you tinker with small edits and bugfixing.

want to find indie websites outside the scope of neocities? use the search engine marginalia to find results you actually want that google won’t show you!

you can also use directory sites like yesterweb’s link section to find websites in all sorts of places.

if you are going to browse the indie web or make your own website, i also have some more personal tips as a webmaster myself (i am not an expert and i am just a small hobbyist, so take me with a grain of salt!)

if you are making your own site:

get expressive! truly make whatever you want! customize your corner of the internet to your heart’s content! you have left the constrains of social media where every page looks the same. you have no character limit, image limit, or design limit. want to make an entire page or even a whole website dedicated to your one niche interest that no one seems to be into but you? go for it! want to keep a public journal where you can express your thoughts without worry? do it! want to keep an art gallery that looks exactly how you want? heck yeah! you are free now! you will enjoy the indie web so much more if you actually use it for the things you can’t do on websites like twitter, instead of just using it as a carrd bio alternative or a place to dump nostalgic geocities gifs.

don’t overwhelm yourself! if you’ve never worked with HTML/CSS or JS before, it may look really intimidating. start slow, use some guides, and don’t bite off more than you can chew. even if your site doesn’t look how you want quite yet, be proud of your work! you’re learning a skill that most people don’t have or care to have, and that’s pretty cool.

keep a personal copy of your website downloaded to your computer and don’t just edit it on neocities (or your host of choice) and call it a day. if for some reason your host were to ever go down, you would lose all your hard work! and besides, by editing locally and offline, you can use editors like vscode (very robust) or notepad++ (on the simpler side), which have more features and is more intuitive than editing a site in-browser.

you can use ctrl+shift+i on most browsers to inspect the HTML/CSS and other components of the website you’re currently viewing. it’ll even notify you of errors! this is useful for bugfixing your own site if you have a problem, as well as looking at the code of sites you like and learning from it. don’t use this to steal other people’s code! it would be like art theft to just copy/paste an entire website layout. learn, don’t steal.

don’t hotlink images from other sites, unless the resource you’re taking from says it’s okay! it’s common courtesy to download images and host them on your own site instead of linking to someone else’s site to display them. by hotlinking, every time someone views your site, you’re taking up someone else’s bandwidth.

if you want to make your website easily editable in the future (or even for it to have multiple themes), you will find it useful to not use inline CSS (putting CSS in your HTML document, which holds your website’s content) and instead put it in a separate CSS file. this way, you can also use the same theme for multiple pages on your site by simply linking the CSS file to it. if this sounds overwhelming or foreign to you, don’t sweat it, but if you are interested in the difference between inline CSS and using separate stylesheets, w3schools has a useful, quick guide on the subject.

visit other people’s sites sometimes! you may gain new ideas or find links to more cool websites or resources just by browsing.

if you are browsing sites:

if the page you’re viewing has a guestbook or cbox and you enjoyed looking at the site, leave a comment! there is nothing better as a webmaster than for someone to take the time to even just say “love your site” in their guestbook.

that being said, if there’s something on a website you don’t like, simply move on to something else and don’t leave hate comments. this should be self explanatory, but it is really not the norm to start discourse in indie web spaces, and you will likely not even be responded to. it’s not worth it when you could be spending your time on stuff you love somewhere else.

take your time! indie web doesn’t prioritize fast content consumption the way social media does. you’ll get a lot more out of indie websites if you really read what’s in front of you, or take a little while to notice the details in someone’s art gallery instead of just moving on to the next thing. the person who put labor into presenting this information to you would also love to know that someone is truly looking and listening.

explore! by clicking links on a website, it’s easy to go down rabbitholes of more and more websites that you can get lost in for hours.

seeking out fansites or pages for the stuff you love is great and fulfilling, but reading someone’s site about a topic you’ve never even heard of before can be fun, too. i encourage you to branch out and really look for all the indie web has to offer.

i hope this post helps you get started with using and browsing the indie web! feel free to shoot me an ask if you have any questions or want any advice. <3

[theliteraryarchitect]

Hi! So I recently discovered removing the word 'that' from 90% of my writing actually made it more fluid and hardly impacted the readability. Tiny achievement but very proud of myself as a novice writer ^.^ I was wondering if (other than the up/down one) there were any other tiny tricks for removing superfluous words? Thanks!

Great question! Honestly, there are hundreds, but here are a few to get you started.

Words You Can (Usually) Safely Cut from Your Writing

That

Then

Start

Begin

Suddenly

Down

Up

Kind of

Really

Just

Basically

In general, look out for adverbs (actually, really), “hedging” words (kind of, sometimes), and ambiguous words (nothing, everything, someone). Some can be cut; others will need to be revised or swapped out. “That” is a classic offender. “Then” can usually be changed to “and.” It’s only necessary to qualify that an action was “started” if the action gets interrupted, otherwise it can be cut. (”She started to cry” becomes “She cried”).

I have a detailed, exhaustive list of words like this (with explanations!) in my book The Complete Guide to Self-Editing for Fiction Writers, which will be done soon :)

Nice to hear from you & hope this helps!

[heywriters]

Adding some more:

started/began (agh, just realized this was already covered, sorry!)

he began to walk toward the door

he walked toward the door

give

she gave a yelp of surprise

she yelped in surprise

feel

he felt an overwhelming feeling of euphoria*

he was overwhelmed by euphoria / his euphoria overwhelmed him

sound (of)

they could hear the sound of footsteps

they could hear footsteps

over (to)

I walked over to the bed

I walked to the bed

looked/appeared

it looked like they were out of milk

they were out of milk

DO NOT just delete these words en masse from your draft. Sometimes they really do need to be there. Beginning writers or writers who undervalue quality tend to overuse these words, and it makes the reading stuffy and hard to get through.

For example, “He started to walk toward the door” may be a necessary sentence if something happens before he gets to the door. If there is no reason to explain his process of walking toward the door, delete “started to” and just tell us he made it to the door. Alternately I’ve seen writers leave out that “started to” sentence when it was necessary, causing me to backtrack and reread.

The goal is to improve reading comprehension for the reader and sound like you’re great at this writing thing. Train your eye for useless stuffing words and you’ll eventually be able to pick apart your drafts without the help of lists like this.

*Toned down rewrite of an actual sentence I read with my own two eyes.

[sycretsside]

So I just started my short story writing class! These are dialogue tips

[lady-feral]

reference later

[heywriters]

These are good tips.

Notice they are not labeled “rules.” For instance, I would have to take issue with #3 if it was a “rule.” There are times, especially in media like film or podcast, where dialogue is the best way to slip a morsel of exposition in and still feel authentic. Instead of a paragraph long explanation of something, sometimes a character may just ask “Why?” and another answer “Because reasons.” Voila, a little exposition in an easy to swallow capsule. Just don’t do it often.

Likewise, #5 sounds too strict until you get to #6. There is a definite time and a place for adverbs and modifiers, but 5 & 6 are there to help you balance show vs tell. “Said” tells us a character spoke. “Using an action” shows us how that character felt while speaking. Both are necessary. Adverbs and modifiers are the quickest shortcut between the two, but in a good narrative readers don’t want shortcuts we want immersion and character building. So keep your shortcuts handy, but don’t cut corners on storytelling.

[badwritermedia]

the elusive 7 act Structure