Oh god I'm back

aka candywhorf | of all the Kevins you know, I'm one of them | bi catastrophe | equal parts pizza and pizzazz | he/they | dude+

[bonivers]

let’s have some fun this beat is sick i wanna take a ride on your disco stick don’t think too much just bust that kick i wanna take a ride on your disco stick

[one-time-i-dreamt]

thinking about the guy who bought his fiancée the Dyson Airblade instead of Airwrap (so a hand dryer instead of a multi-styler for hair) and the guy who got his gf the toy Dyson Airwrap set for children thinking it was the real thing on a huge sale

[candywhorf]

Babe make sure it's the one with realistic lights and sounds

[floralflesh-deactivated20181212]

When I’m bored I paint arms onto VeggieTales screencaps

[bird-big]

god dammit no now they can do too many things like jack off and hit you

[jelloapocalypse]

BUZZFEED: Top 2 Things Vegetables Would Do If They Had Arms

[ashstfu]

i'm SO laid back, i only care about like 3 things in the world:

my favorite fictional characters and music

every person on this earth and their opinion of me

the crushing psychological weight of being alive

[creepymutelilbugger]

i honestly don't even care if ive already posted this. look at it again

[jiminysjournal]

You can only post this one day a year.

[fangorn-forest]

her eyes were the sickly green of the sky before a tornado, and to his horror he discovered she could throw cows around just as easily

[that-house]

to his horror? weak shit. outta my way gayboy im boutta get it

[that-house]

all of our trobles seem so small from up here

[911boofer]

THE NOISE I JUST MADE

[911boofer]

New everything just dropped

[audientvoid13]

“Overthinker” – Nicolae Scarlat, 2020

[candywhorf]

According to the trailers I'm pretty sure this is how Oppenheimer ends?

[cutawaygag]

is that a bug in your pocket or does ur penis have 6 legs & skitter around

[bathroomcube]

im always either posting harry du bois or one of those spore fuckers

[bathroomcube]

yeah yeah you like that? you like that you sick fucks?

[twistedpictures1-deactivated202]

hey you should ask your doctor about MAOIs. my SSRIs weren’t working so we tried those (i’m on nardil) and it did wonders for my mental health. just saying as a suggestion because based on the fact that you put the fucking onceler on my dashboard in 2022 the meds you take right now don’t work

WHAT

[giltspark]

[femmedesyeuxnoirs]

[fuqintrash-deactivated20220529]

[theworsethingsgettheharderifight]

[theworsethingsgettheharderifight]

now who the Fuck did this

[lokisuggestion]

who’s ur BTS bias?

[dykg]

hey girl are you from missouri because you're the only miss i'd yuri

[dykg]

tough crowd tonight

[fallingtowers]

smoked the weed that gives you gothic madness and now i'm on the fucking moors again wearing nothing but a flimsy shift 😑