Cape-Tier.

AJ: 23. Virgo. He/Him &They/Them.

[theweirdwideweb]

[theweirdwideweb]

God Bless America

[rakhna]

Sharks live in salt water because pepper water would make them sneeze

[screenshotsofdespair]

[bewbin]

nunchucks are illegal in some states but guns are not. so if you tie two guns together and create gunchucks it’s neither legal or illegal

[trupowieszcz-moved-deactivated2]

schroedinger’s gunchucks

[worldeaterouroboros]

Why does schroedinger have so many things

[kairibloodheart]

Schrodinger’s hording problem

[party-cat-anthem]

i had a dream last night that luigi had a new form called “gay rights luigi” and he looked like this

[kookeybird]

[picsthatmakeyougohmm]

hmmm

[sixthrock]

hour 6

[memorydatas]

no offense but like…. more saving…… more doing…… that’s the power of home depot

[femboycloudstrife]

what if this is how staff gets ads integrated and interacted with on this website 

[lovablys]

[mothspaws]

List of numbers I hate

If you use these numbers fuck you

[mothspaws]

I’m going to shatter you into a gongulquideus pieces for defending these SludgeNumbers

[barillapasta]

i got this new anime plot. basically there’s this high school girl except she’s got huge mussols. i mean some serious bibols. a real set of bibbols. packin some geegols. massive goosextols. big ol’ gongulquideus. what happens next?! transfer student shows up with even bigger double-hyper-godkubikgathors. humongous tethracross-turreted-dustaculated-tethracubors.

[fuckyeah2000s]

[weavemama]

[retrogamingblog]

Prepare for Trouble

[from-planet-earth-deactivated20]

Actually, could we make that double?

[retrogamingblog]

[tradgothwillbyers]

Y'all ever just suddenly have the overwhelming urge to swim??? Like not actively but you just wanna,,, be in the water and have some Peace

[parttimepup]

Yes it’s called the mammalian diving response and it’s also why doing face masks and taking a shower is soothing. Our amphibian ancestors used this mechanism to slow down the heartbeat and lower body temperature so as not to waste calories while swimming (which is very calorie intensive). It makes you feel safe because predators are less likely to get you in water than on land. The fish brain is alive and well in all of us.

[beyondthetemples-ooc]

It’s literally activated by putting water on the face.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3768097/

[dogs4ge]

My amphibian ancestors gave me the instinct to dissociate in the shower for hours on end

[unabashedlybi-deactivated201911]

[zintersoldier]

white person: *eats chicken tikka masala once* i just…. i feel so connected… to indian culture …. I’m learning to speak islam…. check out my third eye….. chakra

[teaboot]

Every time I see this. Every damn time. I’m immediately sucked back into my fuckin. Fuckin English lit class with Mr. Fuckass McShit. Mr. “Hit the gong to begin class”, “Namaste, Children”, “I wanna go backpacking in India to find my spiritual awakening and also my left burkinstock that I lost during a cedar sauna drum circle” ass bastard. “Do you want to share your poetry with the class to get in touch with your emotions” ass fucker. Mr. “Here’s a photograph of a tribal shaman, describe him using nature words” asshole. Pretentious-ass, condescending motherfucker. “Do you want to tell us about your saddest memory?” “I dunno, sir. Are you giving me an option?” “No.” “Then why are you asking” Every goddamn day. Fuck. “You seem tense.” Oh, I seem tense? I seem tense. Well fuck, Professor Pillsbury, maybe I ‘seem tense’ because I walk into a room on five hours of sleep to the sound of a goddamn brass gong drilling through my brain and your seven-foot-nine, socks-and-sandals-wearing, patchouli-smelling ass immediately gravitates in my direction with some shit like “a tree……… Is a Poem” and I gotta sit here and politely tell you that No I’m Not Comfortable Telling The Class About A Time I Was Emotionally Vulnerable With A Loved One using words that sound like the way the color yellow smells. Maybe I don’t wanna sit in a circle and hold hands with Brittney from Computer Sciences to “align our auras” or some shit. Fuck. Fuuuuuuck. I swear to God, if I wanted to sing ‘kumbaya’ with a smelly old guy with gross facial hair who writes bad porn on the side, I’d go out to the parking lot and share a Hookah with Crazy Dan, the disgraced electrician. What, I don’t wanna do an interpretive dance to represent the spiritual experience of eating Quinoa in a room full of ambivalent preteens and suddenly I’m the ‘troubled youth’ you need to Robin Williams “O Captain My Captain” your way into having a Paternal Bonding Moment powerful enough to Expand My Impressionable Young Mind and Turn My Life Around, you goddamn saint, you? Jesus Fucking Christ. You insufferable jackass. You’re not “Enlightened”, you rolled out of bed and ate half a pot brownie, wrote a sad song about a leaf, and strolled into class to ramble about your Spirit Animal for six hours straight before calling it a day. Holy Jesus goddamned Christ. Fucking Balls, sir. Holy Fucking Balls

[hannahhectic]

This is very angry.

And VERY specific.

[catzgba]

asmr open mic night

[catzgba]

you walk into a crowded bar and I’m on stage loudly crinkling a receipt in silence

[queerdungeons]

Aliens are the least of our worries right now but listen to me. Aliens don’t want to hurt us but the government is gonna convince us they do and incite worldwide panic and start a real space war to avoid advancing technology for the general population because efficient non oil based energy that the aliens have will crush the capitalist industries that need it to thrive welcome to my ted talk

[kirjavaspan]

this post so confidently and sincerely made it’s point that i had to stop myself checking the news to find out if first contact had happened this morning

[theweirdwideweb]