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@catfriendtheories
EXCUSE ME HELLO THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT
BOY IS ON RADAR
IM TOO EXCITED TO REALLY WRITE UP WHAT THIS MEANS FOR CHARACTERIZATION BUT I WILL WHEN IM LESS EXCITED BUT THIS GIVES US A BIG LEAD IN TO WHAT HIS PERSONALITY’S GONNA BE LIKE AND IM SO HAPPY
hey maybe you should tag your spoilers yall
Lynera is coming out today I cant wait!! its almost time to update my theory >:D
This stemc/uster is afraid of me… I have seen its true face. The scutt/e/anes are extended fi/th basins and the fi/th basins are fu// of b/ood and when the resif/uid channe/s fina//y scab over, a// the vermin wi// drown. The accumu/ated fi/th of a// their pai/ing and murder wi// foam up about their torso pi//ars and a// the quadrants-for-profit and po/itricksters wi// /ook up and shout “Save us!” … and I’// /ook down and whisper “No.”
COMING TOMORROW!! FRIDAY AROUND 4 PM PST
hm!! bad
guess she’s back here.
@lanque-hates-terfs
alright, folks! it’s almost Friday and you know what that means: MORE TROLLS! specifically, the launch of Friendsim Volume 9: Of Gazes Cool And Tempers Hot!
I know you’re all just dying to find out who’s gonna be featured – but die no longer! live, and live happy, because here they are:
first up, we have AZDAJA KNELAX! I think a lot of people who saw the volume title guessed this one, and good work! you got it right. you’re officially geniuses. I said so which makes it true
this bad boy is one part Kaiba, one part Vegeta, and all parts insufferable, so I’m sure you can’t wait to meet Konyyl’s partner in crime. his route’s a fun one! you might even say the fun levels are over—well, you know.
and then of course, our other troll is…
the long-awaited…
AMISI—huh?? hang on a second. what’s this new horseshit??? Amisia already got a route! blueblood or not, nobody has the right to hog all the Friendsim screentime like this. we’ve got like, what, 20-ish more trolls to get through? come ON. but then again, who am I to argue with the girl holding a giant hatchet? I’ll let this one slide for now, but you’re on THIN ICE, Erdehn
you can befriend AZDAJA and AMISIA(???) in Friendsim Vol. 9 when it launches TOMORROW, August 3rd!! a bunch of the team is busy that morning so we’re shooting for a 5 PM PST launch. see you then!
totally serious hiveswap theory
Lanque, Tegiri, and Tagora are all boyfriends bc im gay and i said so and everyone so far hates Tagora when he’s mentioned, but Tegiri is obviously a dumbass and a nerd, and Lanque is just amazing ok, in this essay i will
I’m really confused
don’t worry friend, I’m just babbling
I have... A lot of feelings about Tagora and I just want another troll to love him as much as I do that’s all
totally serious hiveswap theory
Lanque, Tegiri, and Tagora are all boyfriends bc im gay and i said so and everyone so far hates Tagora when he’s mentioned, but Tegiri is obviously a dumbass and a nerd, and Lanque is just amazing ok, in this essay i will
A Theory about Bronya
so I’ve been meaning to make this post for a while, as it’s been on my mind ever since volume 3 came out. So, uh, quite a while. Anyway.
So, we know that she’s definitely not a revolutionary. wink.
But, in her route, we get some tidbits of her trying to explain herself.
She talks about how she doesn’t want to be revolutionary because it would threaten her ‘girls’. But... What if something were to happen to her jades, to her nursery, to the caverns, that she isn’t expecting?
Enter...
These two swatches compare the color of her glasses to violet and fuchsia sign colors, respectively. A little suspect to me. Especially considering we know that some trolls wear the color of their quadrantmates.
Which, if you compare Nepeta’s hat to an indigo sign...
It almost seems like Lynera might know a seadweller. And know them very, very well.
I don’t trust like that
So, with the groundwork laid, finally, on to my theory:
Lynera will sell out the ‘technically not illegal’ nursery to her highblood pal.
She’s self appointed to the honor roll. What could that mean, in the caverns? She might think she’s better than everyone else, possibly including Bronya- she might even be trying to usurp Bronya, and what better way than to find her definitely not illegal nursery and call the drones?
And if that happens, it’s already obvious from Bronya’s bad ending that the drones being antagonized in the caverns is bad, bad news. There will likely be a lot of collateral damage. And she will have antagonized the drones and a powerful highblood(possibly even Trizza herself!), caused a lot of damage to the caves, the destruction of her nursery, and possibly the death of some of her jadebloods(and if Lanque does end up becoming a rainbow drinker, like he seems to want, if he is in the caverns... that might even be how!)- That would completely break Bronya.
And I think that’s what it’ll take to make her join the revolution.
enjoy this peaceful look while it lasts- because I don’t think it’ll last long.
On the topic of Tyzias’ matesprit, there seems to be a few categories in terms of likelihood.
So, in short, Tyzias is unlikely to be in a relationship with a high(er) blood due to the fact that she is apparently not the type to keep her ideas quiet to those she trusts. This means that her matesprit would either be lower, the same, or a much rarer sympathetic highblood. Additionally, highbloods are a little less likely since it is implied that only Tyzias’ lusus is still around and highbloods seem to have a greater chance to keep their lusus.
She is also unlikely to be with another Teal or a Jade. I imagine that they would have assisted her in carrying her work if they could (not necessarily helping her once there), so either they are barred from the library (lower blood), busy/forbidden by her/not helpful, or a higher blood who is aware of the atmosphere if they went.
Most Likely: (Olive or lower)
Boldir
Charun
Marsti
Fozzer
Likely: (Jade or higher)
Daraya
Stelsa
Marvus
Tegiri
Galekh
Tirona
Wanshi
Lanque
Lynera
Nikhee
Not Likely:
Zebede (if his card is to be believed, he lives a good distance from everyone. If not, then Most Likely)
Who Is This (I fucking hope he isn’t, but either way I doubt she’s dating someone nameless)
All other trolls already in the friendsim, as I believe that the matesprit wasn’t in this volume due to not being in the game yet and thus not having sprites
Basically Impossible:
Chahut (referred to as single in the card)
Azdaja (already taken)
Mallek (would require Mallek hiding knowledge of blockchain and other digital means of storing data)
Baizli and Barzum (would require the twins to have separate lives, and Tyzias only mentioned a matesprit and her lusus living with her)
Tagora (already accounted for with above and he is definitely not)
The majority are definitely still possible and this method doesn’t take hinted personality into account (esp since some personalities have been different than expected) and it could definitely be someone we’ve already seen or a Jade or higher. However, this is just what feels the most likely based on the evidence.
I have a feeling Boldir “expose the deep-state lunacracy” Lamati might be a likely match... And if so, we might be looking at some kind of Mulder-Scully relationship, which would be honestly adorable. I definitely agree with your points about highbloods- and, if Tyzias is likely to have told her matesprit her plans and ideas, which seems to be true... Boldir already has things to hide, so whats a few more secrets?
@lanque-hates-terfs someone else for the blocklist. Sigh.
also i never want to hear you corny losers praise Undertale ever again for “kueer wokeness” when its One Single trans man is literally more feminine than all of the woman characters lol
Mettaton is not canonically a trans man, he’s a robot with no apparent sexual characteristics at all, and two of those female characters are confirmed gay or bi, as are two male characters. Also, trans men can be feminine if they want to be, and as for Lanque as mentioned in your tags, did it occur to you that he’s a member of an all-female caste on an incredibly violent and restrictive planet so maybe it’s not safe for him to not still pass as feminine?
its confirmed in the lore i LITERALLY dont even play the game and i know that and i dont give a shit if the horrible homestuck person’s design somehow correlates to a bullshit backstory quit reaching to defend shitty transphobic caricatures youre gonna get arthritus
You don’t care about trans people keeping themselves safe, which is a thing which happens regularly in real life, or about trans people being allowed to express themselves in the exact ways a cis person would be allowed to, and I’m the transphobic one? I wonder what you think of trans women wearing pants. Trans people don’t have to stick to your bullshit standards to be trans; they’re already breaking the socially enforced rules of gender, so why would they have to just follow those rules from the other side?
Also, no it’s not confirmed. I looked it up; Mettaton is a robot possessed by a ghost, and that ghost was referred to by neutral pronouns and had a house with pink things in it, which does not confirm that they were female. Additionally, the Hiveswap crew have stated that Lanque is not the only trans troll. They just haven’t pointed out which other ones are. Unless you count nonbinary people as trans (which I didn’t there, mea culpa) in which case there are two of them and they do fit your standards by presenting in a neutral way.
i kin you caring more about a shitty cartoon character’s epic lore backstory than actual trans people and how people percieve them, why do you think idiots like ScarJo are allowed to be casted as trans men because if you damn clowns keep praising and honoring trans men characters that are literally make up twink sissies that are way more feminine than any other male character what do you even think cis people will percieve as that. you really think the dumbshit cis are going to take that positive.
its not about “let trans people dress as they want” its about “making transphobic caricatures leads to harmful misconceptions in real life where cis people will only ever view trans people as ‘not being their full gender’ by making them purposefully align with their AGAB so people can instantly tell theyre a transgender” use ya brain son
I’m hearing “I have never actually spoken to a trans man” and also “I care more about cartoon characters meeting my standards than the feelings of actual trans people” from you. I know multiple ones who choose to dress in a not-traditionally-masculine way, and all of them were glad to be represented, because most media holds up that trans people are only trans if they perform their gender as hard as possible and even then are figures of fun for doing so. Eyeliner is also not exactly unusual among cis men. And now you’re using transphobic/homophobic insults and disregarding the existence of nonbinary representation! Yes, surely you are the one supportive of queer people here.
quick question, @discotyphoon: you say you haven’t played undertale. You were therefore uninformed about Mettaton’s identity. Understandable, I suppose, if you saw someone headcanoning him as trans, or whatever.
But in a similar vein, I think if you don’t understand homestuck’s world, you’re… not going to get Lanque. At all. There’s been a whole lot of debate, and we literally haven’t even met the kid yet outside of three bullet points and one image, so we don’t really know anything at this point, but just from knowledge of the world and his place in it, there are a lot of things that most people just aren’t seeing or taking into account.
Alternia is pretty literally a hellscape- it’s honestly probably worse than our world, in a lot of ways, and nonconformity is incredibly dangerous.
also, we don’t know who all is on the hiveswap team. we know most of them, and there is for sure at least one nonbinary person on the team(shelby craigg, if I remember correctly, at least), so… I also don’t think this is a case of cis people dictating trans narratives.
And anyway, there’s a huge difference between cis people writing a trans character, and acting as one, for your point about scarjo.(who, by the way, is “allowed” to be cast as a trans man by the people trying to erase us, not by the people who are trying to give us representation, so… yeah. not exactly the same thing.)
Thanks for the backup but we probably shouldn’t bother. OP calls feminine men sissies and when called out on this responded with “I didn’t call you a faggot” as if that meant they’d done nothing wrong, and also totally ignores any references to nonbinary people.
I mean, yeah, you’re probably right.
still wouldn’t feel right to me to let it go without saying anything.
Likely at least 22 more weeks till Part 2. GAAAAH. I love the Friendsims but I hate waiting! I miscalculated before; I counted it as weeks instead of fortnights. So instead of five months from the start it will be nine and we likely won’t get Part 2 till November at the earliest.
a few months ago one of my friends and I did some math; it seems likely they’re planning an 11/11 release date for act 2, based on the number of the friendsims and the relevance of the date! especially considering 2fers being paired with other trolls, resulting in a 4-week reduction of the time overall.
that’s also assuming we’ll get a friendsim for every troll call kid. which its entirely possible we might not. who knows!
Hiveswap/Homestuck vs. Friendsim musical canon
I talked about this briefly on twitter but a handful of the characters in friendsim have “canon” music that we don’t use because it doesn’t fit the mood of the route. A great example is Konyll’s music.
In Hiveswap Act 2 there is a significant interaction with her that I won’t spoil, but it involves Azdaja as well. When you overlap their two songs, it becomes a full melody. (kind of like their trollcall card, two sides of one coin etc)
With characters like Remele, who have tracks made for them for Friendsim, it follows what I’ve been referring to as the established “Musical Canon” in that the instrumentation choices are largely based on blood caste. Homestuck has a tradition of doing this whether it wanted to or not a lot of the time and I spent a great deal of time reverse engineering the existing canon to make hiveswap feel like it fit. A good example of this is something like Tagora’s and other tealbloods tracks being the only ones allowed to use harpsichord. “But what about Tri-” shh!
anyway the established musical canon in hiveswap is something like: Burgundy: Synths/Percussion Brown: Trumpet/Horns/Brass Yellow: Chiptune ???: ???? Olive: Mallets Jade: Harps/Bells + Airy/Ethereal Sounds Teal: Harpsichord Cerulean: they just… steal other castes instruments so its complicated to explain. Indigo: Overwrought and Orchestral Purple: Honks lmao Violet: At this point they are so individual that each one has its own musical motif Fuchsia: Whatever they want. none of these are hard rules so those of you out there doing fantroll stuff can just do whatever you want, this is just what we came up with.
July 7, 2018
So, friendsim 7!
I just finished it and I’ve got a few takeaways here, in no particular order.
Marvus is an art appreciator confirmed; possibly making it more likely that he’s also the purpleblood in Ardata’s route.
also Zebruh commissions art from Remele, which is frankly hilarious, especially since she overcharges the fuck out of him.
It’s also really interesting to note the existence of art shows like this- it gives a good look into Amisia’s character(who is also mentioned in the route, which is cool), like reasons she is so upset about how she isn’t good at art; especially when she’s a highblood, and other highbloods both above and below her are doing much better than she is. that also makes me wonder, what’s an artist like Charun doing? because they’re a greenblood, presumably they can’t have art shows like this. I think that’ll be really interesting to explore when it comes to them!
Also, I love how interconnected the volumes are getting! first we had Bronya showing up in Elwurd’s route, and now we’re getting more of that, plus regular namedropping and visual cameos, and im just :D about it! It makes me very excited for future friendsims!
looks like usernames arent quite the same in hiveswap as in homestuck, which is really interesting! we have countryyladyy543 instead of tags like arachnidsGrip. that makes me wonder if that means trollian is the hot new thing on the block, or what, since I believe homestuck canonocially happens after the events in hiveswap(or possibly, it’s an entirely different timeline, especially considering the pop culture references are much newer in hiveswap, obviously)!
Azdaja and Konnyl are matesprits!! which honestly, took me by surprise; I definitely clocked them more as moirails, but matesprits are just as good. also, Konnyl is the jojo’s bizarre adventure to Azdaja’s Dragonball Z. that’s just all there is to it.
I think it’s really neat that we get to know a little more about adult trolls in Konnyl’s route too! it makes me wonder if we’ll get to explore any more of the adult-child relationship on alternia. Seems unlikely, especially considering the circumstances involved, but I can hope, right?
canon friendsim endings and explanations
i’ll only use explinations that i can remember, if i can’t think of any the troll’s route is labeled as indetertminate
ardata: bad ending(lusus)
mspa reader’s cautiousness when encountering elwurd at the start of her route based on blood color implies a bad encounter with a ceruleanblood, and as elwurd was the second ceruleanblood encountered that just leaves ardata
diemen: good end(meat heaven!!!)
in konyyl’s good end mspareader mentions crawling through the sewer with diemen
cirava: good ending(high time)
mspa reader mentions leaving sunglasses at cirava’s when in the sun at the start of skylla’s route
in skylla’s good end mspa reader mentions their look and getting high with cirava
amisia: you will never escape ending(i guess good?)
mspa reader mentions extensive bloodloss at the start of skylla’s route
skylla: good ending
ladyy is safe in konyyl’s route, references are made to fighting off the bandits
bronya: good ending(self care comes first)
she doesn’t instantly try to kill you when seeing you at elwurd’s house
tagora: good ending(just sign here)
mspa reader has mentioned that robe so many fucking times
vikare:INDETERMINATE
polypa: bad ending(>at least your ass didn’t kill her)
remele kills the troll who’s hive you broke into in polypa’s bad ending in her good ending
mspa reader references
zebruh: bad ending
mspa reader makes reference to zebruh briefly filling them in on the quadrants in folykl/kuprum’s route
elwurd:INDETERMINATE
folykl/kuprum:INDETERMINATE
remele: INDETERMINATE
konyyl: INDETEMINATE, likely good ending due to getting phone at the end
feel free to reblog with corrections or additions, i will edit this post from time to time to keep the list accurate
I didn’t notice the mention of Zebruh’s route in Foly/Kup’s, nice!
Perhaps every few friendsims we’ll get a volume where the bad endings are the only ones to continue?
Only makes sense after all, can’t befriend everyone you meet.
