Drug and alcohol free since June 26th, 2026. So far, 3 week(s), 0 months, 0 years have elapsed since my last intoxicating substance.
I hadn't been doing drugs before then, but I'd been drinking. Usually just getting buzzed, but I started to have at least 4 drinks a day due to... emotional reasons.
Then, the night of the 25th, I got drunk after something really emotional hit me. Shouldn't have hit me that hard, but it did. I had 8 drinks in relatively rapid succession to try and deal with the emotional pain.
Problem? Had to give Louie his evening walk. So... I took my cash out of my wallet and hid it, so nobody would get any cash from me if someone mugged me while I was unable to defend myself, and walked Louie.
Nobody mugged me. I was fine. But I worried someone I really care about, someone who really cares about me... who I hope may one day care about me again in the way they did. Either way, I worried them, and they mean the world to me.
I need to get my life in order. She made me promise to never do what I did again. I decided to go further. I initially promised to abstain entirely for a month. Then, all of July. That would be simpler to remember, make it a deeper commitment.
But then I decided... no. That's not enough. For the foreseeable future, I will abstain. For a period of years. How many? I don't know. But I said the foreseeable future, I said years, I said I may go back on it someday, BUT, not until years, plural, have passed. So, at minimum, I will not drink again until June 26th, 2028, nor imbibe any other intoxicating substances.
I will not cause her to worry for me again like I did that night. I will spend or save my money more wisely. I will work on becoming a better man... even if it hurts sometimes, even if sometimes I want to numb the pain. I must suffer through it if I want to get past it... and hopefully, before too long, I'll get the life I want to live.
Until then, this post will be pinned. I will update it each week, hopefully, but certainly every month, to document my commitment.
I need to be worthy.

























