The important thing is moral choice. Evil has to exist along with good, in order that moral choice may operate. Life is sustained by the grinding opposition of moral entities.
Anthony Burgess, A Clockwork Orange

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The important thing is moral choice. Evil has to exist along with good, in order that moral choice may operate. Life is sustained by the grinding opposition of moral entities.
Anthony Burgess, A Clockwork Orange
em--harris:
Feeling her throat constrict in effort to hold back tears, she pretends to busy herself by looking over more charts located at the foot of his bed. None of it really made sense to her and his reply actually made her feel better than anything a doctor could write about his condition. He was still Jace. “Isn’t this where you say I should see the other guy? Expect he’s worse off than you?” she murmured, trying to fall into their old routine but ended up falling flat.
She crossed her arms - a unconscious habit she had formed in effort to comfort and protect herself. “I know that…now. If I could go back…” she looked up to him and all of the typical fight was gone out of composure as she moved a bit closer towards the head of the bed. “My definition of family was distorted by my father. I shouldn’t have put those same expectations on the two of you but I never lied about anything else to you two. I hope you can believe that.” She hesitantly put a hand beside his.
“Damn you for scaring me like this…”
“they’re dead. i ain’t. so i’m callin’ that a win.”
one on one, wasn’t a big deal. four on one was tougher - especially when they were hunters, especially when he’s trying not to get someone else killed in the process. it hadn’t been a fun couple of nights.
and yes - he’s pissed. real pissed at her. but he’s also not a freakin’ heartless bastard. maybe that worry... maybe those slight trembles to her words... were real. she looks... a lot more vulnerable... a lot more - fragile - than he thinks he’s ever seen her. and while jace buries his hurt in a stony wall of anger - he doesn’t exactly want to see her crashing up against it. doesn’t want her to have to carry any - guilt - because of that lie. and yes - he can see why she did it, but he’d thought... maybe he’d hoped - that truth was something that would have come out sooner. stumbling on her in the woods like that had been a... shock. to say the least.
“my definition of family is real simple. it’s the people close to me. the people i -- care -- about. the people i trust.”
he pauses. gives a small shrug.
“family ain’t always blood, em. so...”
a small sigh. some of that wall finally crumbling. only the slightest shift of his fingers to slip beneath her hand and curl around it carefully.
“...you gotta trust me if i’m gonna trust you. no more secrets. okay? promise me.”
zacharyhawtorn:
“Even better. At least, a lot less messy.”
And no chances on making things worse while getting Jace here. Maybe the guy, or the ones around him, would learn it one day. He smiled at Jace’s short reaction. Yeah… he had definitely start lecturing again, with someone who probably didn’t need it. It seemed like Jace was more or less knowing what he was doing.
“I know it’s not my fault… it’s just frustrating. I mean… I come from the time we couldn’t do better in a lot of cases. It’s blowing my mind that people still choose to do it that way when we’re so much more progressed now.”
He nodded. So Jace knew, about him and Erik. And he was still here, talking to him. Well, that was at least something.
“Yeah, he likes to rub it in from time to time. He doesn’t need to, though, I know what I’ve done. And I wish I could undo it.”
He blamed himself enough for it without Erik coming back on it now and then. That was something he would never stop blaming himself for. He just shrugged.
“That’s what arrogance can do to you. I have Erik as a… well… more or less living example of what happens when you let it take over.”
And yeah, he could have known it wouldn’t be enough for Jace. That he wasn’t going to be satisfied when Zach was just trying to pick up his life again. He just couldn’t cross a certain line and stand next to Jace. Not if that would put him against Erik. Standing at the other side of Nicolas? Yes, he would be willing to do that, although he knew how that would end, but Erik? No. Not in a million years.
“And trust me. I can do something for the victims of the not so normal part of this town as well. Wouldn’t be the first time, trust me.”
He had patched up Amber more than once, also when she was hurt by Pandora. He could help other supernaturals. He could even help people like Jace when they had an injury that was harder to explain.
“Wouldn’t it help you to know there was at least one doctor you could call when something went wrong? I could help you as well, just like your brother. And…”
He swallowed when he thought of Talia.
“And girls like Talia… so they don’t have to become what she became. So they don’t have to die like her.”
He smiled slightly.
“I can get used to the smells… I did it before. I’m just a bit more on edge right now, so I’ll have to find my way back into it. And by the way, the coffee machine is two floors down. I wouldn’t recommend you getting your coffee yourself. Yes, I can smell that and no, I wouldn’t recommend it. There’s more between here and there, you know.”
He grabbed the bell next to Jace’s bed.
“And if you’re to stubborn to push the button to get a cup of coffee, I will, even when it’s just to stop your whining.”
“some people don’t choose to do it that way. i’m all for progress, blue - but in the good ole’ u s of a - progress still costs money. and sometimes, cold hard cash is harder to come by than a pouch full of tobacco... or a leech.”
it was all well and good for the portion of the populace which had a job. who had medical insurance to cover them when they needed it most. the people that the rest of america liked to forget about. the ones living on the line of choosing between paying rent, or buying groceries to feed their kids. hell, the ones who weren’t even lucky enough to have that choice.
“don’t forget - not all of us have the luxury of over a century of savings.”
he just shrugs when blue goes on to explain the guilt over his brother. jace is pretty familiar with the feeling, except it’s one of the things he - doesn’t - talk about. it’s also the reason he was here, in this shittip of a town in the first place. trying to make it up to him, attempting to make aments - a personal penance of sorts. and sure, he’d gotten close... real close... but he hadn’t killed him. something - some hind brain thing had stopped him. had kicked into place ( not soon enough, but not ‘too late’ either ) and waved a flag and shown him exactly what he was doing -- or, more importantly -- who he was doing it to.
“technically - a ‘not-living’ example.”
but he drops it. doesn’t really want to get tangled up in a one and a bit century old domestic - it really wasn’t any of his business.
“point is - why wait until ‘an innocent’ becomes ‘a victim’. the damage is already done - and like you said before, blue -- some of those ‘scars’, the ones you can’t see... take a hell of a lot longer to fade... if they ever do.”
he does however, halt at the next words, a catch of inference that has jace sitting even more uncomfortably in the already freakin’ uncomfortable bed, and on hearing them, he does push himself up a little more, trying to sit at least vertical rather than flopped into a couple of lumpy pillows--
“--hold up, what’d you mean - just like my brother?”
since when did blue a) know tris and b) have any cause to ‘help him’. because it sure as hell came across as though he already had. and last jace can remember, he’s the first - and hopefully ONLY - anderson to make it into arcadia general hospital.
talia -- the girl that died... the first time he’s heard her name mentioned as the one who died, but he HAS heard it before...
“she was a hunter.”
natalia had mentioned her. had said she was one of the... ‘good ones’. okay -- so, jace is more than a little surprised that blue actually communed with other hunters, but that can only be a good thing, right?
“as long as there are victims. there’ll be hunters... like me... maybe like her. like i said - i was born into this life, raised into it. but that ain’t the common way. most hunters? they fall into it. or get dragged. they experience the supernatural - and not in a good way. maybe get attacked. maybe lose someone they care about... revenge is a pretty cold, hard customer to deal with, blue. some of them... they just ain’t got the knowhow, or the experience to deal with it... they just dive in, headstrong... and most of ‘em...”
there’s a pause. because he’s seen more than a few hunters lose their life to a reckless or careless moment. not knowing what they were going up against. not having the training or the knowledge or the skill to see them through. he doesn’t believe in ‘making’ someone into a hunter... but if they’re already in the game, then he does believe in trying his best to make sure they survive for as long as possible....
“...don’t make it out the other side.”
“we ain’t exacly a bunch who make it to a pensionable age, blue. y’ever seen an old hunter? nah... because there ain’t any. and i’m - sorry... that she died. i really am.”
a pause, a purse of his lips. it was never good news to hear about a hunter being killed ( even though he’d killed the few who’d done this to him, but - they’d pretty much deserved it after what they’d tried to do to amber - and to him, and at the time, there hadn’t been another way ).
“hey! this ain’t whining! i just don’t think that a cup of the hot stuff is too much to ask for after...”
saving a life? it’s not like he ever asks for anything in return - doesn’t expect it, doesn’t want it, but he’d be damned if karma couldn’t see it’s way to a cup of coffee.
“...gettin’ shot.”
tatianawitchdoctor:
‘Sorry, i wasn’t aware that the hippocratic oath only worked on the clock.’
She wants to laugh at that kind of naivety in a hunter. Part of her wonders when it was that she lost her own… To assume that workplace oaths are binding anywhere and everywhere; to assume that she can afford the luxury of carrying around her day job whenever, wherever. She can’t apply these healing hands indiscriminately, not anymore. It isn’t noble, but then real life so rarely is. And she can’t bring herself to apologize for that day; not when his death could’ve been for the greater good. For Lily, for Arcadia. Still, she flinches when he chips her hands away, prior-knowledge and prejudice making her anticipate pain or some kind of aggression. It doesn’t come, but she’s still rooted in place, evidently wary of trying the hands-on approach again. Instead, her hands were balled into fists as she listened to his venomous tirade.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” She interjects, when he tosses out the word ‘figures’ as though any of their interactions this far have fit the predictable bill. But his implication dawns on her a few seconds later and it’s all she can do not to groan and slink out in favour of the nearest cup of knock-out coffee. “Fine. I’m s o r r y , okay??” She begins again, grappling for the kind of patience neither of them have with each other. “For yelling at you the other time, at the gun-range.” The words are terse, evidence enough that this isn’t easy for her. Not that she’s naive enough to think it’ll get her any points with the steel-hearted hunter. “That wasn’t your fault.” The memory is a bitter one for many reasons, the lesser of them being her ugly run-in with Jace. There’s Alaina, first and foremost; for whom the mere recollection brings back a familiar wave of grief. Loneliness too… How would Alaina handle this; handle him?… Better than her, surely. And then there’s Remy; whom she’d found not long after her run-in with Jace… Remy, who’d witnessed the breakdown that she was still trying to suppress in her memory. Asking the necromancer to bring Alaina back had gone against every rule her grandmother had touted, every one she’d parroted in turn. It was the worst low in her life, and all things considered, she was glad Remy had skipped town not long after.
“You don’t decide when my obligations are over.” There’s no malice to be found in her voice this time, but the tone remains firm. She doesn’t bother to correct him on the chosen adjective either though; on the fact that he is exactly that - not a charity-case, not an empathetic cake-walk - but an obligation, plain and simple. He’ll be her patient as long as it takes to transfer him into another specialist’s care (and given their perpetual state of being short-staffed, there was no telling when that’d be) - or to authorize his release. The sights of him suggest that won’t be ASAP either. “I’m s o r r y , okay? I know that you hate it - and me. I get that. I’m not gonna keep you in here any longer than I have to either. Can you please just… Get back into bed??” For a few days, or just the one. For a few hours, or just fifteen minutes, at this point. Ample time for her to finish the check-up and rally-race her way out of here.
“the hell i don’t.”
a sharp reply when she talks about her ‘obligations’... the rest, he’s still thinking about. he’s not sure he’d ever hear the word ‘sorry’ fall from her lips - that were usually too busy demeaning or screaming or lying. so forgive him if he’s taking it with a slight pinch of salt right about now. but there were three strikes on that card... and only two apologies. the worst, she’s yet to bring up - the time she lied about the ambulance. and he imagines that she would have probably rather seen him brought in here on a body bag than a gurney.
he does push back up to his feet - slowly, wincing slightly as he goes, one hand pressed firmly against the worst of his wounds, an oddly familiar wet, warmth seeping beneath his fingers and starting to stain the stupid ass flashing gown that he’d been put in. he has no clue where his clothes are, not that they’d be in any state to wear. so the gown would just have to damn well do. hell, he’d made it from the barn back to the car, back to the house then handled a werewolf on the turn while bleeding out - he could walk out of this fucking building.
“in case it wasn’t clear - i’m discharging myself doc. as of - right now. don’t exactly need to be in the ‘care’ of someone who -- doesn’t.”
he does manage a slightly bitter laugh though - grabbing for the little clipboard at the bottom of his bed and tearing off the top sheet with notes of meds, fluids, obs... turning it over and scrawling with the blue biro that was snugged in the clip, dictating as one hand makes a shaky scrawl.
“i, do hereby discharge myself from arcadia general hospital. signed -- jace anderson.”
the paper is crumpled, and he tosses it onto the bed, a smear of red staining one corner.
“it’s official, you no longer need to worry about your -- reputation, doc.”
because that was clearly the most important thing here. not actually helping people. it’s all about appearances.
“y’know - hate is a strong word. i tried to just... be nice. to get to know you? no preconception, no judgement, nada. but you sure as hell haven’t returned the favour and you certainly ain’t given me one single goddamn reason to ‘like’ you. but you just go ahead and make up your own mind about how i feel, why don’tcha? you’ve already made up your mind about everythin’ else to do with me. why stop now?”
the floor is cold beneath his bare feet. and he’s pretty sure that he’s going to be a hell of a lot colder by the time he walks from here, all the way back to the crapshack on the edge of town. no clothes. no wallet. no money for a cab ( not that they’d take a bleeding guy in a hospital gown anyway ), no phone to call for a ride.
“whatever bug you have up your ass bout me... sure as hell does carry a lot of hate now, don’t it? and - i tried to work out what it was that i’d done. maybe i’d said something wrong, maybe i’d fucked up real bad... but y’know - i haven’t. and considerin’ you seem to think you know a hell of a lot about me, makes me think that that -- hate -- was in full flow before i even set foot in this town. so i’m still wonderin’ doc -- if your little screaming pitch at the range wasn’t my fault, then what is my fault, huh?”
though the ‘sorry’ did sound a little like she was about to choke on it - but he’s not ready to just drop everything and accept those bitterly offered apologies at any kind of face value - there was more to this than a quick bitchfit. she’d known about him. known what he was. who he was. and he wants to know -- why.
“how about you save the apologies and just try the truth for once.”
em--harris:
Of course he was still angry at her.
Wouldn’t be Jace if he wasn’t. And as odd as it sounded, she felt relieved to see the familiar spark of anger in the man - she felt like she could breathe again. She hadn’t realized she had been holding her breath since she got the news that it was the older Anderson in the hospital.
“Came to see just how bad your ass had been kicked for you to wind up in this place,” she replied without hesitation, her response almost automatic as if this was just a normal conversation between the two of them. Like nothing had changed, but his expression said otherwise.
Her eyes went from chart to monitor and then to the man in the bed, her expression softening drastically as she let out another shaky breath as emotions overwhelmed her.
“I didn’t know if I would find you in one piece….“
oh jesus.
he might be bedbound and hooked up to all kinds of beeping crap. might be a little numb on the super jolly cocktail of painkillers he has. but he’s still a hunter, and even now, he’s sharp enough to catch that small hitch in her breath, the waver to her words. it’s like a punch to the goddamn gut.
he wants nothing more than to reach out and tell her that it’s okay. that she doesn’t need to be scared... but he’s... not convinced - can’t be. won’t let himself get suckered in by another charade. he just can’t afford to take that risk.... for all he knows it’s just another spin on the lie. crocodile tears to try to fill the gap where she’d betrayed their trust.
“m’still here. that’s pretty much as good as it gets.”
there’s none of his usual joking. no light quip about being ‘tough as old boot’s’ or whatever else he might have normally said. but that was all just dancing around the elephant in the room.
“y’know... i get it. i get why you didn’t tell us, em. at first. but then... after that... we were supposed to be... family. you - know - us. and hell, if not me, then at least tris. you know how he--”
--feels about you--
“--is.”
thexdarkxwithin:
She finds herself grinning and a small spark of the familiar Amber that is usually present in his company, does surface for a minute. Which is exactly how she is, never really truly staying down for long–even though some might find that a little more difficult to believe if they don’t know her because yes, the young wolf can be grumpy and quick to jump down someones throat.
“Your puns….seriously corny…but definitely my kind…”–and they are. Time and time again she has blurted out the corniest pun and even laughed at her own humour.
It’s only when he closes his eyes as though he is imagining it, does she actually laugh and nudge him–not hard and hopefully not enough to cause anything to hurt, but it’s damn impossible for her to constantly hold off from doing something that actually does come automatic for her.
“Oh don’t worry…my imagination can conjure up a few things which would make the freakin’ pope pass out.” There’s a quick wink just as he opens one eye and Amber sports one of her slightly lop-sided smirks.
Having a stash of cash for emergencies, or maybe when you haven’t quite found the time to hustle a few games…or in Ambers case, other illegal means as well, is a great idea. Only she would know it was there if it was hers and that would make her lazy and end up spending it anyway. The only control and respect she seems to have for cash is when it’s that of those she cares about. Loyalty does come in strong there and swindling is definitely out of the window.
“Fuckin’ smart idea if you ask me. Even though I’m hoping you aint gonna be suddenly ‘getting out of dodge’ anytime soon, I will still make sure whatever I take is replaced okay…” There’s no questioning tone at the end of her words, purely because it is more of a statement on her part.
The candy is quite frustrating actually, it’s far too hard and she literally has to chomp down on the elastic too to break it. Yet she still does so, determined with an unwarranted stubbornness that she will not be defeated in stripping it bare apart from the oblong candy watch face.
“Edible jewellery is more for kids..edible underwear is more for the kinksters amongst the adult nation.” She offers him a smirk. “Have you eaten any?..I always wondered what it tasted like…rice paper?…or maybe gelatin stuff….” Looking at him, the young wolf nods and smirks. “Hell yes…when you are up and about, I think you need the full works, a greasy quarterpounder with cheese and bacon….side order of fries…double fries…and obviously you gotta wash it all down with a few beers–because well it’s the rules aint it.”
When she hears him tell her about Tristan and the relationship the brothers have between them right now, Ambers expression remains serious. “Well maybe coming here is what you both need, but things can take a while. You’d both still put your life on the line for the other, right?….because that speaks volumes if the answer is yes.” Amber has had her fair share of things happen with her own brother and maybe it isn’t as bad as the Andersons, then again, he hasn’t really said what. She has nearly killed Connor on a full moon though and even though she isn’t in control of her wolf at that time, it was her fault she wasn’t restrained that one night in the past.
Her hand reaches to just rest on the top of his and she strokes across the knuckles before letting go again. It’s enough to show some affection, but it doesn’t linger enough to come across as what she might call soppy. “Hey…well…I aint gonna judge you, Jace….none of us are innocent–we all have dark stuff we would sooner not see the light…especially around this town apparently….including me.”
“Then I will drop by the house this evening before dark and see if he is around..because does he know you’re here?–he will no doubt be worried as fuck if not.” Tristan did come across as a more than reasonable guy to be fair, especially how they first met. “When he was just a stranger in town…did he tell you a swiped his wallet?” She’s not sure the younger Anderson brother has said anything about it–but it’s not something she is about to try and hide. “He had a shitload of fake I.D’s in his wallet and I was like, ‘what the hell??’….but he found me and I gave it back–that was before I knew you both.” She knows it aint right to steal, fraud people etc…but it’s not something she would dream of doing to any of them now.
Raising both brows as her visual shoots between him and the TV, Amber blinks and smirks. “What?..the mighty mexican….what?…I aint ever heard of that, so the days of our lives has gotta trump it.” She casually leans over and takes the still relatively hot coffee of his and has a sip before giving it back.
“my puns are a work of genius.”
he says with the utmost confidence. they obviously aren’t - but hey he’s gonna take the credit for a bad sense of humour. childish and at times a bit silly. but if you abandoned all ‘silly’ things then life just took on a dreadful, dreary shade of grey. no fun. nothing just to smile about. he does, however, huff out a bit of a cautious chuckle at her next comparison... maybe she meant - sailors - or pirates - or some other sea-bound swarthy sex crazed stereotype...
“the pope? you seriously need a better metaphor than ‘the pope’ sparky. if there’s anyone who wouldn’t be able to handle that amount of ‘imagination’, it’d be the holy-man.”
he just shrugs at the notion of having a little put by. it made sense to him with the kind of lifestyle he had. that, and the fact, he’s not only looking out for himself, but his brother. and as much as it might be nice to have some kind of ‘supernatural survival’ advantage - being a human meant that the basics still needed to be taken care of. food... shelter... water... that and he hadn’t had a couple of hundred years to build up an investment portfolio like some of the vampires... so having a little hard cash to see you through a rough spell was handy.
“couldn’t get out of dodge even if i wanted to, sparky. we’re still rainchecked for vegas, remember? unless the bubble went pop and i dunno about it...”
not that he would. oh, sure - he’s been sorely tempted to just say ‘fuck ‘em all’ and just leave them to the shitstorm they caused for themselves. but that’s not really how it works. because there were still people... innocents... who would get caught in that crossfire. human blood spilled through no fault of their own - other than choosing the wrong town to settle down in. the humans... and others. like amber.
he doesn’t need to think so hard about her next question though.
“nope - generally, on occasions like that, i’m too busy with - other things, besides - why would i want candy when i could have cherry pie?”
and at that, jaces grin slips from something innocent to something decidedly devilish. but it falters a little as she reaches out to offer him some comfort. he’s not entirely sure he deserves any comfort. not after what happened. and he’s really not sure about the ‘fixable’ part... but he hopes. just hopes... that maybe things might get better. even if there hasn’t been much sign of it up till now. so there’s just a silence, a small nod at the question of putting his life on the line for his brother. always. at any time. though he’s not so sure that it works the other way -- and at the same time, he’s not sure he wants it to.
“dunno if he knows.”
jace sure as hell hadn’t been able to call him. no phone. no money for a payphone. not that he’d been able to get out of bed to find one anyway. and he doesn’t exactly want to hand out tristans number to the hospital for their records.
“but, nope - he never said anything about a stolen wallet - fake id’s are a hunter’s bread and butter. so that’s not really surprising - giveaway 101. but if y’all sorted it out between you then no harm, no foul. though i’ll be sure to give him some shit for fallin’ foul to a pickpocket.”
there’s a small smile as he tries to look on the more positive side. and careful shift in the bed, moving to one side to give amber a little more room on the uncomfortable mattress to sit and see the tv.
“telenovella... it’s like a soap opera. but with more drama. and there are usually a lot of people screaming at each other in spanish. they’re amazing. and quite often the only thing that you can get tuned into on motel tv.”
zacharyhawtorn:
“I think I’m kind of glad that… someone managed to drag your ass in here.”
Somehow he had the feeling that was more or less how it would have to go to get Jace to lie down in a bed and let professionals do the job for hem. And ok, he’d admit it was a lot easier to report to the hospital with a bullet wounds than with pretty suspicious bite wounds, that too.
“Seriously, tobacco. And other things I’m not even sure I want to identify. I can see the leeches working… I mean… I’ve seen more than just modern medicine in my life. Actually… I have worked with them, when I was still human.”
The new methods often were more effective, but he knew better than practically any doctor around that the old methods weren’t completely useless either. If you couldn’t go to a hospital, like Jace often said, that might work.
“You maybe not. But my antipathy against home medicine comes from all those guys who think they can treat cancer with herbs. I’ve done that. I had to do that, all those years ago. I’ve seen how the mortality rates of diseases like that decrease over time and sometimes I wish they would have seen what I’ve seen. It’s not personal towards you, it’s just… it’s frustrating, you know. Seeing someone close to dying, or in a best case scenario we’re able to keep them alive but amputate and arm or a leg and knowing that if they just had come in earlier, we could have saved them.”
He started to laugh a bit when he heard himself talk.
“Sorry. Lectures kind of come naturally to me. It’s driving my brother crazy.”
Then he shrugged, somehow glad with Jace’s reaction. He wasn’t overreacting after Talia’s death. He had a right to be let down by it, he had a right to grieve. Not as much as Theo had, but still… He had lost someone important as well.
“I know I could have done something. I cheat, remember? I try not to, but don’t think I wouldn’t have thought twice about cheating to save her.”
After reading the autopsy report, he was pretty sure he wouldn’t even have bothered with playing doctor… he’d have fed her his blood, no matter how she would have thought about it at that time, no matter how dangerous it would have been. He would have watched her closely afterwards to prevent her from becoming a vampire by accident, but he would have done it.
“And you clearly don’t know me well enough, man. I still carry the guilt for something I’ve done hundred fifty years ago. No, it’s not what I should do, but apparently that’s how I roll. I need more than a few weeks to get rid of the idea I could have done something.”
He would, eventually. He hadn’t killed Talia, like he had killed Erik. He just hadn’t been there. That wasn’t something that could haunt him for an eternity. He’d recover.
“I know it’s better not to get hurt int he first place, it’s just… I can’t stop everything and everyone who’s trying to harm someone. It’s not just supernaturals, you know. Drunk drivers, people who just mean evil. I can help those victims as well.”
He wasn’t that naive to think he could stop people from getting hurt. There would always be something… even the good supernaturals slipped. He wasn’t suicidal. He didn’t want Jace to end all supernaturals, because that would mean ending him too.
“That’s probably your job yeah…”
“someone - managed to call for an ambulance.”
he hadn’t been ‘dragged’ anywhere... but that aside, jace was pretty damn grateful for it too - and it’s probably obvious in his tone - lacking any harsh bite and something more of relief instead. he does, however, take a moment for a breather - because even talking was a little tiring right now. that, and the fact that his throat still felt like sandpaper, his mouth parched, voice hoarse and rasping. he’d be forever wondering if while he was out of it, that the world had somehow run out of that joyous little bean... that, or perhaps coffee was just a fantastic hallucination and in the waking world it had never existed at all.
either way... the words roll on. not so much point or purpose to them, just blue sharing a little about his thoughts. this... is probably what normal people do. just have - normal conversations. about normal things. about the strangeness of people when dealing with sickness or hurt... he doesn’t really blame them ( other than the pointlessly real stupid ones ) - sometimes desperate times brought out the strangest things. though at the notion of lecturing, jace does allow himself the luxury of sound - a brief snort.
“i’d noticed.”
he does purse his lips... dry lips, that feel a little rough when he finally speaks.
“that’s just the thing though. can’t save a limb because someone left it too long. that was their choice - not yours... so... you do the best you can with what you got.”
there’s a soft sigh at the notion of ‘cheating’ -- yeah, jace knows exactly what he’s talking about. not so long ago someone had ‘cheated’ to save his life. he couldn’t really say that if he had that kind of power - that he wouldn’t risk it himself - take the chance to save a life.
there’s a brief pause. jace looking back up at the vampire at that notion of ‘guilt’. because yeah, he’s aware now - of what happened.
“i know what you did. he told me.”
in no uncertain terms and without a great deal of understanding about - why... jace seems to recall the word ‘selfish’ being used. and for all he might be tempted to use healing blood to help save a life - jace still isn’t sure if he could have gone that far... salvation? or condemnation? to be a vampire for the rest of eternity. he doesn’t think he could do that to someone... especially not his brother... so, no - he doesn’t get it. but he’s not really trying to - it’s not really any of his business to go poking around in theirs. he’s not going to understand what happened between them a century and a half ago - only that it did and... here they are now. and at least... one of them... is trying to do... something.
“normal people have normal doctors to help them when normal shit happens to ‘em. what they don’t got is a lot of people willin’ to stand up for ‘em when something ‘not-normal’ comes callin’ -- ain’t a lot of medicine that can fix that - cheatin’ or otherwise.”
there’s not a lot of argument behind his tone. he’s not going to try to persuade him otherwise anymore. it’d be something else if the supernatural took a stance... and he knows a few who are trying to - but a little like the hunter... the ‘human’ hunter that jace was... the odds weren’t the greatest. not everyone liked to be on the side of the underdogs. but as far as jace was concerned there was no ‘probably’ about it.
“so yeah - it is my job.”
“but you seem to be holdin’ up okay. can only imagine what kind of smells you’re gonna experience in this place. it ain’t exactly pleasant for me - and i ain’t the one with the super senses...”
“...otherwise i might have sniffed out that damn coffee machine...”
em--harris:
When Tatiana had informed her that a hunter was in the hospital, Emma’s heart had dropped as her mind raced to who it could be and just how badly he or she must be. A hunter never went to the hospital freely. It was typically only in life or death situations. She texted both Tristan and Lily and heard back from both of them by the time she reached the hospital and finally had her answer. Jace.
She paced outside of his hospital room for quite a while as she debated what to do. If things were like they used to be, she would barge in and just give him a hard time for getting his ass kicked so hard he wound up in a hospital. But this wasn’t like it used to be. Their last parting words were nothing but anger.
He could have died and their last words were angry. Shit.
Pushing aside all her mixed feelings, she entered his room just as he was asking for a cup of coffee. Typical. It wouldn’t be long before he was harassing the nurses. “You look like hell,” she observed as she finally came face to face with her friend, holding back a wince at how bad he looked. She hadn’t seen him like this in a long time. Emma paused at the foot of his cot, not sure how close to get.
she was about the last person he though would walk on into this room. the last person who he probably wanted to walk into this room. it’s not as though he hates her ( jesus - she was... she’d... been... family... ) - but right now, she makes him real, real, fuckin’ angry. perhaps she’s just cleverer than he gave her credit for. she’d managed to fool him and his brother for over a year after all... she’d picked her moment well, when he’s at his weakest... most tired. most hurt... because he can’t exactly summon the energy for another bout of snappish venom.
at the same time though -- he can’t really bring himself to believe that she’s here because she... cares. can’t believe that the lie didn’t go further than the secret he’d discovered. because if she could lie about that... she could lie about everything else - right? and that hurts more than the damn gunshots. it hurts more than anything that left a physical scar. it hurts - because it takes a LOT for jace to put his trust in someone... and he had... and just look how that’d turned out...
“what d’you want?”
tristan-anderson1:
It was clear to Tristan that Jace was unhappy with him, he knew that he had been distant lately, it wasn’t something he was doing on purpose, it was just something he had kinda just fell into really. Tristan let Jace do his thing, he was listening, but he couldn’t help but to let his thoughts run away from him when it came to the news about Emma, of course Jace didn’t understand his thought process, Jace didn’t know that he and Emma had spent that night together.
Tristan had heard the other things Jace had said about this town they were in, so he decided to push his other thoughts back for now and focus on their main problem, Arcadia.
Tristan looked at Jace, “ I get it Jace, I’m sorry, I haven’t been in the right head space lately, I admit that and I’ll own up to that,” he said, “ I just haven’t been feeling like myself much lately, I haven’t for a while actually, but right now that’s not important.” he said to his older brother, he ran a hand through his hair and let out a long breath.
“we - were supposed to come here to do this together and – gotta tell you kiddo – there ain’t been so much of a ‘we’, lately.”
Tristan knew Jace was right, they haven’t been much of a team lately, not since Jace went dark, it wasn’t for lack of trying on either part either, it was just how things played out. All Tristan wanted was to get back to the way they were before all that mess went down, but clearly it was easier said than done. It was just something they had to work through and they only way to do that is for him to get back into the flow of things again.
Tristan frowned at what Jace said next, “ Even if that was the case, no one ever leaves the hunter life, and even if it was possible to do so, I’m too deep in it.” he said, he knew nothing else, he only knew how to be a hunter, he was raised in the life and he was going to die in it too, he accepted that a long time ago.
“ Jace, I don’t want to walk away, and you’re right, since all that happened things haven’t been easy for either of us, but even so, we’ve never given up before and I’m not planning on giving up now. You’re still my brother, even when you weren’t yourself you were my brother, we didn’t go through all that and the consequences of it to just give up now.” he said, “ Things have been difficult for me since that night, I’m not going to deny that, and yeah, sometimes it takes its toll, but I’m working through that and I think what might help is if we work together to get back to how it was before, or something close to it.”
“ The people in this town need us.” That much was clear to him as well, he may not be aware of everything going on in this town like Jace did, but he was ready to get back to work, “ I’m in, so lets get to work.” he said.
it was clear to jace that tristan wasn’t listening to a damn word he was saying. or just hearing the bits he wanted to hear.
“no - it is important. since when have we ever had the luxury of ‘me time’? if it’s something that has you distracted enough to be wanderin’ the streets readin’ poetry to daisies - or whatever it is that you’ve been doin’ - while people are dyin’ and this whole town is on some kind of magical lockdown then -- yeah - it is important.”
he does take another drink from his glass, letting it idle between his fingers before moving back to take a seat on the other side of the counter... letting out a long sigh, softening his tone and fixing his little brother with a pointed look.
“i’ll always be your brother. no matter what. but that ain’t gonna stop you makin’ your own decisions about stuff. and the last time we swept somethin’ under the carpet and went on like everythin’ was fine -- well, that didn’t turn out so great - did it? and that one’s on me, man... i know it is. secrets never work out so well between us. so if there’s somethin’ on your mind... then maybe it’d be easier to deal with if there were two of us...”
lips pursed for a moment it can’t have been the news about emma that was bothering him - because they’d only just found that out - and it was pretty clear from his brothers reaction that he hadn’t known either... and whatever it was that was on tristan’s mind had been there long before that -- pretty much from the moment they got to this goddamn godforsaken town.
“i’ve been here, tris. i told you i’d do anything to make it up to you. and i’ve been here... for... a year now and...”
he just shrugs. tristan wasn’t the only one of the brothers who was dealing with what had happened that night.
“...i’m just tryin’ to do my best, man. so if you wanna do this, great - i mean that - but we do it properly... no more secrets. head 100% in the game from here on out - right?”
zacharyhawtorn:
“Yeah, right… sounds like you needed to be here. Good thing you’re at least not too stubborn to admit that much…”
There weren’t a lot of people who did home medicine who knew that well what had to be done. At least, he hadn’t met them. It made him a bit more at ease with the way the hunter treated himself, even when Zach would prefer him to find professional help most of the time instead of just those instances he almost died.
“Trust me, if you’ve seen a guy come in who treated a leg wound with chewed tabacco, you’d be wary of everyone who thinks they can do my job as well.”
He nodded.
“Just thirsty then. Well, I don’t think I can get you a cup of coffee, but there is a tap over there. If you settle for some water, I can get it for you. If you want more… well, the red button is your best friend for that.”
This whole aftercare thing… he wasn’t good at that. He usually just patched people up and sent them home, or to one of the wards where others took care of them.
“I know. Or at least, I suspected. Although I thought you had more experience in bite wounds than in bullets, to be honest.”
And well, a bullet meant that at least Erik wasn’t involved. He didn’t even know if his brother knew how to use a gun, but he was sure that he preferred using his teeth or his strength to kill than a gun.
He shrugged. Why was he here? Because he was crazy enough to think he was ready for it? Because Talia’s death made it impossible for him to sit and watch any longer?
“A friend of me died… a very dear friend, actually. And… well… it might be some kind of wake up call that I can’t stand by anymore. I wasn’t able to save her, when I probably could have done it when I would have been there when it happens. But there are tons of people being brought into the ER, so I’m actually trying to see if I can manage to be here without losing myself. I want to get back here, Jace. I want to heal people again.”
“pretty much. if it weren’t for...”
amber. but he daren’t mention her name. he knows she sees blue as a friend, but at the same time, he’s not about to go blurting it out to anyone. if she wanted to say something about it, it was really her business...
“...someone - helping me out, i think that maybe i’d have had to take my chances with a staple gun and a quart of bourbon. probably wouldn’t be here talkin’ to you right now. didn’t really have much time to put any of those -- skills -- to use.”
he’s a hunter, yeah. but he’s still human. not infallible, not invincible and - yeah - sometimes he needs help too. at the same time, a patch up job wasn’t a clean and clear road to recovery. for all jace mostly dealt with his own injuries himself, he couldn’t look after other people... hunters were pretty much transient by nature... and he didn’t have the know-how or the resources to take it any further than making sure they... survived.
“--seriously though-- tobacco? they’d have been better off with leeches. old fashioned as it is, they still have some medicinal properties at least. don’t get me wrong, blue - i can’t do your job. i don’t do your job. i just do mine. and - sometimes, that means patching people up until i can get them somewhere where they can be looked after properly. somewhere like this.”
jace just attempts a small shrug... most of the scars that map his skin have been gained from torn flesh caused by fangs or claws - one really odd one just below his right butt cheek where he’d mis-timed a jump over a fence and speared his own ass on a sharp bit of metal... but two bullet wounds before these two... and still, they remained in the minority of his strange collection of injuries.
“generally - yeah... most things i go up against tend to want to tear me into itty bitty pieces with pointy canines or thing i’m the next best thing to a chew toy... but -- sometimes...”
one hand lifts and he makes a ‘shooty gun’ motion with his fingers.
however... his hand hovers in the air for a moment - not entirely sure he’s hearing what he thinks he’s hearing.
“jesus -- wow... i’m... sorry, man. but y’know -- even if you’re ‘in this’... out there... tryin’ to make things better, y’can’t be everywhere at once. i ain’t saying you could have done something... or that you couldn’t have... but one thing i know for sure, is that carryin’ around a chunk of blame -- ain’t gonna do you any favours when you’re tryin’ to get yourself into a better place.”
yeah, jace is real familiar with carrying blame. the words come from a place he’s been - a place where, a big part of him - still is. and sure, it’s easy to offer those words to the vampire, not so easy to follow them himself. but wasn’t that always the case?
“still think it’s a better idea to try to stop ‘em gettin’ hurt in the first place...”
a point on which they’d - apparently - forever disagree. violence, hurt, harm, trauma... they wouldn’t need patching up if there wasn’t any of that in the first instance. a small shrug - at least blue was actually doing something. ... or well, thinking about doing something. which is - he supposes - a small improvement over not thinking about doing anything at all.
“...i guess that’s my part of the job though, as much as this is yours.”
thexdarkxwithin:
How she is right now, it’s difficult for Amber. She is used to putting on a front and appearing to the world as some mouthy little blonde who either comes across as hyperactive, or quiet and bad tempered. What some fail to realise is, when she is bad tempered, it’s usually to cover a whole host of emotions or worries she has in her mind. She clings to anger and wears it like armour, letting people see she is to be avoided–not bothered with–someone to not be around. Yet peel away the armour–find that chink in it and it becomes a whole different story.
Jace has found it and that’s why as she sits there, it is hard for her to wear the mask she usually portrays.
–There’s no urge to cover it with anger–no burst of energy to prove everything is peachy and whilst she thinks the latter might be a bad thing, Amber knows it also means he has got closer to her than she ever thought anyone would be able to.
Through all that has happened, she is still smiling, albeit it’s a tired one, but to achieve that, it definitely has to be the company she is in.
“Well…what you said back at the house about a nurses uniform too…I thought I might get one…but then..well…seeing you now–I think it would be a bad idea.”
She’s teasing him and that is clear by the smirk which graces her face.
“Because you still aint so well…and I think if I donned one for you–those machines would start bleeping like hell–blood pressure would rise..not to mention something else would–and I would cause more freakin’ damage than good…so you will have to use that vivid imagination I know you have, sweetheart.”
Amber shoots him a wink.
“At least for now….” Because apart from the real nurses, she really doesn’t see anyone else entering his room dressed like that. “Damn those nurses..I mean…who the hell in their right freakin’ mind can resist your charm?”
The young wolf grins, fully joining in on the joking he is doing and this is something she welcomes so much because at one point in his house…that night…well…no…she refuses the thought to enter her head–but it still keeps trying to every so often.
“You keep an emergency stash of cash in the trunk?” She is about to say no and she will manage just fine, when it’s as though he knows her too damn well and mentions that the money hasn’t been obtained through proper means. To her, this makes all the difference. “Well…maybe I will use some of it…but only on the understanding that it will be all back within a day or two.” Which basically means she will make some money that won’t be from legitimate sources either.
Chewing on the candy, Amber can’t say that it really tastes awesome, but perhaps it’s enough sugar to perk her up for a short while–this is her logic anyway. Amusement etches her face however when she sees his expression.
“It’s some candy bracelet-come-watch thing….some kid gave me it…well did a deal for a pin badge on my jacket.” Amber empties the elastic and just leaves the square candy watch face. “Here…this is for you….” Reaching over him, she places it on the cabinet on the other side of his bed. “Doesn’t beat burgers…or pizza…but it’s all yours.”
If she is truthful, then she is relieved she didn’t have to answer all of the questions that Jace had to. More than likely she would have screwed up on some of them, or what sounds very realistic is she would have lost her temper. When she can’t explain properly or gets backed into a corner, the young wolf starts lashing out verbally and sometimes physically.
“There’s something to be said for memory loss due to injury…”
Her line of vision follows to where he is pointing and she moves slightly, picking up the clipboard and looking at all of his notes. Her brow raises on some points and others, well her expression just looks confused. She doesn’t know what half of the medical terms mean..that’s generous–she doesn’t know what three quarters of it means. So she places it back at the end of the bed and scrunches her nose up. “Well you are on the mend…that’s all I give a shit about.”
–promises. Yeah, she heard plenty before and most have been broken, which makes Amber quite wary usually. Yet she believed him and trusted him when he made a promise to her.
“I know you don’t…I mean…from what I know of you…I can tell you don’t..” She looks at him and in her eyes it’s clear to see she is grateful to him, but they both know these kind of words don’t always need to be spoken out loud.
Slouching her shoulders a little, the young blonde kicks her shoes off and lets them drop to the floor, listening as he speaks about Tristan. “Of course he likes you…he’s your bro…unless you have had shit happen between you…” It’s not something she is about to ask him. From previous chats, Amber knows that if he wants to say then he will do. “I don’t know him that well..but he seems a caring guy I think….and you can’t share a house willingly if you don’t get along.”
He gives her something to think about when he talks of the hunters and how they work. She really doesn’t like the idea that some could still be alive or others are there waiting for someone to return. Amber can sometimes jump in feet first and be far too impulsive, but luckily with being sat there with him, it gives her time to think it through and whilst she probably would still attempt it on her own–she makes her own promise to say she will ask someone to go with her.
“I will okay?…I’ll ask someone…sort it all out…get rid of the mess and then I will come back here.” She nods and throws a smile his way. “I promise.”
Letting her gaze linger on him, she then grins and grabs the remote. “Let me look what crappy daytime TV has to offer.” Pressing the power button, the TV comes on. She can’t normally watch shows or movies for very long before her attention starts to wander, but if he doesn’t mind that, she doesn’t either. “Bet you like ‘days of our lives’, don’t ya?” Her brow wiggles and she lets out a small chuckle, moving back a little so she can rest against the headboard.
“hey, don’t you worry sparky - a nurses uniform will always be cause for a ‘rise’ -- in blood pressure or otherwise, no matter what state i’m in at the time. -- texas... alaska... and the ones in between.”
what? just because he’s been shot doesn’t mean that he’s suddenly lost his knack for terrible puns... c’mon. and at the notion of using his imagination ( which can be horribly vivid sometimes, enough to give the hunter reason to wake from sleep, covered in sweat for a less than pleasant reason, it can also be put to use for some more -- entertaining pursuits... ) -- jace just eases back a little into his pillow, lets his eyes drift shut and smirks...
“oh, yeah... now THAT i can do...”
he squicks one eye open and chuckles... which is probably not a good thing because something gives a slight twinge, making it’s presence known above the cocktail of drugs currently dosing him up. but at her next question, jace shakes off the pretence and offers a slightly cautious shrug ( so as not to jostle or pull on anything else ) -
“been caught in a pinch a couple of times. just means that if y’all gotta get out of dodge quick sharp, then there’s somethin’ to tide over until the next hustle.”
he didn’t blow his money so easily. hunting wasn’t exactly a ‘paid’ profession. it didn’t come with medical insurance for damn sure, so he’s gonna have to fake something for the hospital bills - run it up on a fake credit card and let some corporation bank take the hit. it was a kind of shitty thing to do, but it was about the only option he had. so if there was ever anything coming his way, from a hustle or otherwise, it just seemed smart to try to make that cash go as far as possible. and ten dollars here, twenty there, into that stash in the trunk, mounted up over time. he doesn’t apologise for it. isn’t apologetic about it. hell, he’s probably saved more lives than half of the consultants in this damn ER, solved more cases than most cops on the force ( though he can’t exactly go around announcing either of those facts )... and while they got to go home, to a family, to a home, probably a mortgage and bills and a tidy little pension waiting for them when they retired... kids and soccer club... jace just moved on to the next job. it wasn’t the easiest life... but it was his life. somehow... he doesn’t think amber would begrudge him any of it... not the hustling. not the bit of money in that .44 case. not the parts of it that were... fake... because they had to be. because at least here - with her - there’s no fakeness. it’s just -- r e a l.
there is, however a squint as the elastic pings from her teeth - sans candy - and she tugs off the small item.
“i mean - i’ve heard of edible underwear before - but i don’t think i’ve ever seen edible - jewellery?”
the little ‘watch’ face is a pasty yellow colour and it makes a ‘clank’ as it’s dropped onto the side table. possibly something that might chip a tooth at a push, but as soon as he had any appetite, he’d probably try it ( free candy after all... ).
“thanks - so far i’ve gotten all of my nutrition in some nasty liquid form... from a syringe. so anything that’s actually - edible...”
...though judging by the look of the watch, that was debatable...
“...will make a nice change. and if you think that i ain’t havin’ the biggest, greasiest cheeseburger as soon as i’m out of this joint? then you don’t know me so well.”
he does snort slightly at her comment about memory loss, this time making sure to move his hand to where the worst bullet hole was patched over so there was no discomfort.
“c’mon sparky - professional bullshitter here. ain’t the first time i’ve used the whole ‘memory loss’ thing as an excuse...”
he does grin, but this is probably the first time he’s actually lost enough blood to make it so believable. six units was... not a small amount. but at the next topic of conversation, he does wince. it’s not a physical pain, but a rather vivid memory. one that scared him... even now. some shit? yeah, that and all the rest. he’s already told amber that he used to hunt without mercy. he hasn’t told her that that darkness almost caused him to lose his own brother -- no... that’s not right... to - kill - his own brother. he’d come - so close...
“some stuff happened between us. some... real bad stuff... that’s why we came here. to try to fix it. i... don’t know how - fixable - it is though. so we... share a house. barely see him. i don’t know so much if we’re living with each other... or just - around - each other...”
at some point, his gaze had shifted, down to knuckles that were folded over those starched sheets. still red and bearing the cuts from the door that had been blasted apart by the shotgun. but jesus - she’s not his confessional... so... the words just trail off to be followed by something inert.
“he’s a good guy. a real good guy. if you can get him to come with then he’ll do right by you. i know him well enough for that.”
it’s just a shame that he can’t exactly place himself in that same category. jace -- isn’t -- a ‘good guy’. not after what he’s done...
so he just gives a small nod at the promise. offers a slightly smaller smile. then just as quick as his own melancholy clouds his thoughts, it’s gone again, shaken off, pushed aside.
“damn right i do. days of our lives is the bomb -- which might only be trumped by the mighty mexican telenovella.”
moonchildshawn:
“It is what seems like, yes”
He wasn’t holding grudges, but he also wasn’t a pushover, they had just one pleasant conversation, the other times he didn’t exactly treat Shawn very well. So he wouldn’t really do favors for someone that didn’t treat him nicely. When he said that he simply treated others the way they deserved it was true, if someone treat him nicely, he would treat them the same way, if they don’t, he won’t either.
“It was just a question, one little question”
Fair enough, he was in the hospital, could be in a bad mood, thing is that the other times, he wasn’t, and treat him the exact same way. He wasn’t sure why he treated him like that, after all, the wolf never done anything against him, he also didn’t hurt innocent people. He would understand if that was the case, but it wasn’t, and the blonde didn’t really care enough to ask why, if he wanted to treat him that way, then so be it, but Shawn definitely wouldn’t treat him nicely either.
People often mistook his niceness with being a pushover, when he was far from it.
He didn’t hate the other,he wasn’t a bad guy, but as long as he kept treating him the way he did, he would do the same.
“No, I just saw you when I was heading to the front door to get out and ended up overhearing you, but don’t worry, I won’t stay long”
jesus.
yeah it was just a question. a personal and invasive question - which, if it had have been answered, would probably result in another lecture style monologue about whatever bug had gotten up the guys ass this time. all he seemed to do was wander around - gawp at whatever jace was doing at the time, whine or nag at him about it - and be utterly useless otherwise.
so, he overheard him and decided to shuffle over just to be a dick about it? real nice - he wonders if he’s this jolly to the kumbaya kids too. why not take a shot at the guy in the hospital bed? it was probably easier than actually getting off his ass and doing something about the shitstorm in this town. he hopes that - for what it’s worth - it gives him the warm fuzzies. make him feel like the big man to antagonise the sick or injured.
“whatever rocks your socks, blondie.”
so the hunter turns over, in as much as the wires will let him, attempts to make himself comfortable among the drips and monitors ( not easy with a couple of bullet holes ) - and closes his eyes. he doesn’t have to be ‘nice’ to people who do nothing but bitch at him for actually trying to do the right thing. he’s too damn tired and too damn sore. and yeah, he’s ended up in a bad state, but it was better than one more body on the slab in the damn morgue - those were the risks. this was the price. save a life - then have someone be an ass to you over a cup of coffee - there was a decent slice of irony.
“sure - don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out.”
or do. whatever.
#I love it when dean’s face carries on entire conversations with itself
thexdarkxwithin:
“I’d seriously contemplate it, yeah.” The corners of her mouth turn up to form a familiar grin that he is no doubt used to by now. In truth, if there was alcohol in it–and putting aside it wouldn’t really be sensible with the condition he is in–she would share the damn coffee with him. “We will never know though, seeing how it’s just plain old coffee–if it can be called that because those machines are freakin’ crap.” Amber looks over at him and shrugs. “Anything hot and wet is probably good for you though at the moment while you’re stuck in that bed though, huh?” She realises the words spoken and smirks. “I was actually referring to the drink and nothing else.”
She’s actually quite glad that she has taken a seat on the bed beside him, because she feels a little light-headed. It’s nothing too serious, but when stress, worry and concern are the only things which course through your entire body–the relief that comes when it dissipates, it can do something physical, almost draining.
“I’m just tired…once I get some food down me and some sleep, my healing will kick in better.” She looks at him and gives a lazy lop-sided smile. Having her head stomped on really doesn’t help matters and it was only days earlier that she had her head slammed into a wall by an asshole vampire.
She closes her eyes momentarily as he touches her bruised face. It’s tender as hell, but at the same time it does offer some comfort as well, so she gives him a soft look as she opens her eyes.
“I know I would’ve healed faster without using my mojo on you as you call it…but we are both here, right?–and I’d sooner have us both around than just me–so I don’t freakin’ regret it one bit.” Besides, his injuries have to heal too and with being human, they’ll take longer than hers.
It does raise a smile though when he speaks about his car. She can totally appreciate the fact he thinks so much about it. It’s definitely been a pleasure to drive, even through the dire circumstances which cropped up to have her behind the steering wheel.
“Six months?..shit…that’s a long while.”
Yet she can still understand him doing so. Amber is pretty sure she would spend most of her time in a car if she legally owned one. To her it would beat paying for a motel room to sleep as well and certainly better than the woods. Now the young wolf does like wandering the woods at night sometimes, but sleeping there like she does a few times, it’s not ideal.
She catches on to his reference of the car and her nickname too and there’s an urge to nudge him playfully, but luckily she stops herself at the last second as she remembers he might be a little ‘delicate’ right now.
“Hell yes…she is far better than most of the motels I get to stay in–funnily enough it’s quieter as well because the rooms next door sometimes, I swear they are having fuckin’ gangbangs or something.” Amber knows with the type of motels she pays for, it’s more likely to be hookers using the rooms for ‘business’.
Looking down at her wrist, she sees the candy watch that some kid gave her whilst she was trying to find out the room Jace was in. She wasn’t going to take it, but the boy was clearly eyeing the small pin badge on her jacket–so they did an exchange.
–so she bites it between her teeth and pulls of a couple of candy rings–links–whatever the hell they are.
Chomping on them, she notices his expression change and raises a brow at him.
“I didn’t think you would blame me, Jace…I know you aint the kind…and I know you know I tried…just meant it doesn’t mean I didn’t fuck up.”
Letting out a sigh and tilting her head slightly as she looks at him, Amber nods.
“You’re right though…as long as things turn out fine…then we both did okay…..though I gotta ask…didn’t they question where I’d sewn you up?”
She isn’t the type to continue with showing her worry and explaining the extent of how scared she was–but Amber still remembers all the blood and realises what a close shave it was with the whole shifting into her wolf form too. That is one thing which she really daren’t think about–not the consequences if they would have been too late anyway.
“ Yes we are still here…and I’m glad…real freakin’ glad…” Her expression softens as she smiles. “You did promise…though I gotta say–that’s one I would’ve forgiven you for if you weren’t able to keep it…yet I wasn’t gonna tell you that at the time.” Tapping her finger on the top of his hand, one place she thinks she can find that’s not too sensitive and aching, she continues. “One hell of a promise though, huh….”
She’s perked up a lot more since being in his company and is just about to talk when he starts moving position.
“Woah hey…be careful…”
Her brow furrows and she sighs, realising a split second before he speaks, what he is going to say, but she waits anyway until he has finished some of it.
“Fine, okay…just don’t go fuckin’ moving like that..you might bust a stitch or some shit.”
It’s not like she is going to argue with him, though Amber knows herself well enough to know she will probably still leave and go there tonight to clear up the mess. He doesn’t have to worry about that right now though.
Then he follows it with something else that kind of makes it difficult not to agree and so she inhales and takes a deep breath.
“Alright…I won’t go alone..I promise…see…my turn to promise you now….but Tris?…aint seen him for a bit and I aint even sure he damn well likes me…gonna be awkward going there as well if he doesn’t know what I am…” She keeps her gaze on Jace and cocks a brow. “Does he know what I am?”
considering he’s the one in the hospital with a few holes punched through him... jace somehow feels as though he’s the one doing better right now. sure he’s cold and sore and it’s going to take a while to recover. but at least he’s in a bed and... there might be food at some point... even if amber was the one who’d had to bring him coffee... but amber? he’s not so sure she’s doing so well. the huts just keep on coming... and there’s only so many you can take before the chips around the edges turn into deeper cracks.
he’s a little slow off the mark with the joke and it does take him a fraction longer to catch on to what she’s saying. usually he’d be the one making the wise cracks, the innuendo... but when his brain does finally catch up, he gives a soft snort.
“y’never know - i play my cards right... someone might still turn up in a nurses outfit... not any actual nurses though, they seem pretty thin on the ground. ain’t seen one since...”
since he came round to a barrage of questions and things being shone in his eyes, things being poked and stabbed with damn needles... ugh.
“...well for a while. besides, i think they’re a bit too mean to be swayed by my stunning good looks and obvious charms.”
now he’s the one who’s teasing. but he is -- worried. still.
“just make sure you do. if you need something for eats - check the trunk. there’s an emergency stash tucked inside the .44 guncase. and - don’t worry, it wasn’t gotten by any legitimate means - pool hustling - remember?”
she might feel a little better about accepting the help if she knew that the cash was earned through a drunken game... in fact, a few drunken games... there was about a grand - enough to see someone through the sharp end of a dry spell. there’s a small ‘hm’ as she talks about not regretting using her mojo. he doesn’t regret her not regretting it either - but he hopes that the delay to her own healing, that the hit she’s taken on his behalf - isn’t too bad.
“six months in the company of a beautiful lady? weren’t no hardship. no roaches. no slightly concerning stains on the bedsheets. no watermarks on the ceiling. no -- gangbangs from adjacent rooms... bliss.”
he watches as she chews on... something. not exactly familiar with candy bracelets. it doesn’t look wholly nutritious. and in so far as jace tends to fill his own body with vast amounts of crap, even the ‘crap’ tends to have at least more than pure sugar...
“and when i say ‘eats’ i mean... actual food - pizza. burger. rack of ribs in barbecue sauce. not... what the hell is that anyway?”
oh, hell yeah, they’d asked him questions. a lot of questions. bonus of being severely wounded was that - once he’d vaguely got a hold on his brain, that he could lie through his teeth, and actually had sounded reasonably convincing.
“yep. told em i must’ve tried to do it myself before they got there but i couldn’t really remember. bonus of blood loss, transient global amnesia – it’s totally a thing. a thing i don’t have, by the way - but it’s down on the chart.”
one finger points to the little clipboard dangling at the end of the bed. various scribbles. doseage of drugs. general monitoring... blah blah -- they’d asked about the bullet holes. he’d put it down to -- home invasion gone wrong. but it also explained the mess - signs of blood smeared all over the kitchen, up to the front door. a struggle of victim under -- terrible circumstances. as for the perpetrators? he has no idea. they must have made a run for it after they shot him... panicked and fled... or - something like that. and for once, jace has some legitimacy behind the claim. he’s living there with his brother while they make repairs to the old place - the mass of tools and paint and plaster around the house was testament enough - that, and he has a signed tenancy... so...
he does go slightly crosseyed though, following her finger as it taps on his forehead.
“don’t make my promises lightly, sparky.”
yes, he could lie through his teeth when the occasion called for it, but when it came down to something meaningful, something real... something -- important... lies are the furthest thing from his tongue. he’s not entirely sure he believes in the concept of honour, or chivalry or... any of those old fashioned traits. but he does believe in honesty - especially with those he cares about.
“i’m fine... i’m fine...”
he does arch a brow though - jace hadn’t really... talked... to tristan much since they’d gotten to this town. his brother had been pretty much awol... and after what had happened between them, jace doesn’t exactly blame him for needing a bit of breathing space.
“i’m not entirely sure he likes me either.”
at least that’s honest. but whatever bad feelings tristan might be harboring for jace, he knows his brother well enough ( he thinks ) to know that he wouldn’t turn his back on someone who needed help...
“they were after you in the first place, sparky. and i’d rather you didn’t go strolling right back in their front door -- if -- there are any left alive. truth is, i don’t know... was kinda in a hurry to get out of there. but -- no -- i ain’t told him. ain’t really my secret to tell, y’know?”
“even if you can’t find him -- find... someone. take blue -- if you can persuade him. or even the ice queen witch bitch. just... come see me. so i know you’re...”
okay. safe. alive. -- all of the above.
“...just come see me after? now -- what do you say to tryin’ to find somethin’ on this shitty ass tv... and just, lettin’ the world take care of itself for the next hour or so, huh?”
ceciditvenator:
“the ‘war’ is already here. has been for a hell of a long time – longer than me. longer than you. you don’t have to start it - hell, you don’t even have to finish it – but you gotta make the decision for yourself… what are you fighting – for?”
that’s something he believes. completely. that war was something that began millennia ago. but choosing to fight - staying in the battle… not for power or greed or glory or…. anything like that. but for goodness, and understanding, and protection and… peace. that - was definitely something worth fighting for.
he does give a soft huff of a laugh, wandering to the other side of the room to put down the bits and pieces, dumping the bloodied items in the trash… he can clean the rest up later.
“hey, slugger - take credit where you can. don’t matter what it is - if it works out in your favour - it’s a bonus. and note for the future - cut out an arrow, don’t yank it out. if you have to - snap it off a couple of inches above the wound so it doesn’t get snagged on anythin’.”
he does flip the arrow though, holding the point in his hand, that silver tip safely away in his palm, offering the ‘safe’ end to the young woman. followed by a slight quip and a flash of a grin.
“better be careful though. with all this silver and arsenal you’re buildin’ up - people might mistake you for a hunter.”
he does purse his lips though – what’s out there in the woods. and in this case - what was ‘still’ out there in the woods. tied securely to a tree.
“speakin’ of which – i still gotta go have a chat with our buddy out there. make sure he gets the message and perhaps takes up a… different hobby.”
jace knows it isn’t going to be quite that easy, and he’s not exactly looking forward to it. but it had to be done - talking a hunter round was a little like repeatedly hitting yourself over the head with a brick. he knows. he is one.
“you’re welcome to what’s left in that bottle, and whatever’s in the fridge - there’s a spare room upstairs - second door on the left. bathroom first on the right - or you can just take the couch. take your time, get some rest - heal up. and – if something that looks like the abominable snowman with long dark floppy hair wanders in – that’ll be my brother - please try not to do the whole – grrrr – thing at him, yeah? i mean - tris is pretty chill, but he’s still a hunter… so…”
he pauses at the thanks. it’s not something he hears that often. and it actually takes him by surprise.
“it’s… uh… i mean… you’re welcome. now get some rest.”
“That’s not a very hard question. I know what I want to fight for. For myself, the people I care about. To make sure that the asshole who ruined my leg -and I’m not talking about the hunter, even when I don’t wish him all the best- doesn’t do it with anyone else again. And he’s targeting the pack here, so I guess I don’t have much of a choice in the matter.”
She didn’t want the Arcadia pack gone. First she didn’t want it because she didn’t want Kristos to get what he wanted, but now she was getting to know them… she really liked them. Not just because they were old friends of her pack, but because they were just nice people. Welcoming. They were giving her a home.
“Oh, I know. And I’m not above taking credit if I actually deserve them. I did knock him out, so… I’ll gladly take credits for that. And let’s just hope I never need to use your advice. This is not really an experience I like to repeat.”
She took the arrow from him. Not to use it, just to keep it as a reminder of what some people were capable of. To remember why she had to train a few times a week to get better, if the constant ache in her leg wasn’t motivation enough. Apparently Kristos wasn’t the only one she had to be able to defend herself from. This guy was just as much a danger as the alpha was. She chuckled.
“I’m first and foremost a werewolf, Jace. So no, I’ll never be a hunter because that’s just not me. I just… I don’t want to be defenseless again. I’ve been there once, not doing it again. And with that busted leg, I need to get other advantages.”
She winked, knowing he meant it as a joke and she could take it as one. She just wanted to make clear to the man she was looking up to why she made the choices she was making right now. Somehow it was important that he understood.
“Good luck. I hope you manage. I don’t feel like meeting him again anytime soon, so…”
She laughed at his description of his brother, even when she was really grateful for the hospitality he was offering as something that wasn’t a big deal. She was still a wolf though, while he was a hunter. He was going to talk to someone like him to defend someone like her, and it meant a lot to her.
“I’ll be have, ok? I only did the whole grr thing because you were cutting me open. You had a good reason for it, so I’m not blaming you, but it’s not really my default way of greeting someone. Most definitely not in someone else’s house. I’ll behave, don’t worry.”
She leaned back on the couch, taking another swig from the bottle she was holding again. She’s probably want something to eat, but she’d wait until she had at least some time to heal up.
“I will. I’ll be fine now.”
--fin--
moonchildshawn:
“It seems like you really can drink a cup of coffee”
He remembered seeing a coffee machine close by to the other’s room, he had a good night of sleep, so he didn’t drink, but maybe he could get a cup for the other. He just drank coffee when he didn’t have a good night of sleep, to wake him up, but when he was fully awake, he didn’t see a reason to drink it, he wasn’t the biggest fan of coffee.
“I stopped by here to sing for the little kids, I do that sometimes, what happened to you?”
“yeah, and it seems i’ll lay here forever wondering what that might be like...”
brow arches. they could debate over what jace was and - or wasn’t allowed to have. either way, the hunter is too damn tired to ask again. and too damn sore to argue. so he just tips his head back into the pillow, tries to rearrange himself into a comfortable position - which is pretty much impossible given all the damn wires.
“you grill the kids about their illness and injuries too? -- i had... an accident.”
well. if you could count being shot by a gang of rogue hunters while trying to rescue a werewolf... accidental. probably not. but whatever. he knows it’s a waste of breath trying to explain anything. he’d probably get another lecture about how it was unwise and socially and morally unacceptable or something. but hey, at least he’d proved his own point. if he hadn’t done anything - just sat around like social justice seemed to want to, then amber might be...
...well. he’d done something. and she was safe.
whatever - this guy couldn’t get any more vanilla if he tried. sit back while people were dying - but sing to kids - right. jace is half tempted to ask if he sings ‘kumbaya’.
“so you gonna sing to me?”
might actually relieve the boredom - even if he might die of thirst ( so sometimes he’s a drama queen, okay? ), and he’s pretty damn fed up of just listening to the machine beeping.
zacharyhawtorn:
“Well, if you get fluids and don’t need to pee, there must be something to say about that whole dehydration thing.”
He winked, trying to make a joke to lift the tension that was always there in a hospital room a bit. It normally didn’t bother him, he was used to it and he was there as a professional, but as a random visitor, it was a bit different.
“But yeah, I never got anyone into the ER who got dehydrated by caffeine. It’s no problem. And I happen to know they do coffee rounds every now and then. Just don’t blame me for the quality of the coffee. It’s not good. Sorry.”
There was a reason some of the doctors had installed their own coffee machine in the employee room. There was a day that you had had enough coffee from the machine to be able to endure it any longer.
“You don’t have to convince me of the use of caffeine, man. I’ve lived through entire days on that stuff, so I’m a convert already.”
Mainly because it just helped him to appear more human than he truly was, but he couldn’t help but depend slightly on the effect of caffeine to stay awake if he pulled another long shift because he didn’t feel like going home and he was the best option to stay another night. After all… he could do with less sleep that most of his colleagues.
That was something he hadn’t really missed since he had left though… the rest of it? He was sick of standing at the side doing nothing, which is why he was carefully trying to see if he might be ready to get back.
“Yeah, yeah, I know the whole supernatural problems. It’s a bit less urgent here, trust me. There are doctors who know -although most of them were on a leave because they were… instable-, and trust me, the ones who don’t know… they still live in Arcadia. They’ve seen some weird wounds in their career. But really… I’ve seen a lot of weird stuff from people trying to play doctor at home.”
Fine, that were usually the more alternative types who were trying to replace stitches by herbs and things like that. It never worked well. At least not for the people that ended up in the ER anyway.
“Good. I’d hate to defend someone who did it to you. You know, with the whole staying neutral thing you hate so much.”
It was mostly the problem that there were a few people he just couldn’t drop. He didn’t have any problems with speaking out against Nicolas, that Jacob guy or Pandora, but if it would be Erik… he would still have a problem.
“class three haemorrhage. cross matched six unit transfusion. large-bore IV cannulae for rapid fluid replacement - 12 hour intravenous antibiotic prophylaxis. systolic stabilised at 110. not exactly something i can mock up with a home medi-kit. -- don’t think that just because i ain’t got a fancy schmancy medical degree that i’m some kind of base amateur, blue.”
he’s - educated enough - after all, when you trained your whole life as a killer, it was part and parcel to know where to land those fatal blows. the most devastating wounds. a quick kill was a clean kill. and more chance of a human - a hunter - walking away from it. sometimes - things didn’t quite go as planned. and he’d probably patched up more people, himself and his brother included - than half the doctors in the damn ER. you kinda classed as a ‘first responder’ when you were the one pulling someone’s ass out of the fire. and a lot of the time, those people had been hurt - some of them pretty badly. so... patch them up enough that they’d survive before getting them to a place where they’d be safe and get ‘proper’ medical attention.
“but i’d say from all that - i’m pretty well hydrated.”
the slightest raise of brow. he’s not trying to impress. but he’s also not someone who doesn’t have a goddamn clue. he doesn’t do -- weird stuff. knows well enough how to stop severe bleeding. how to mock up a splint. how to cover a wound. how to stitch. how to cauterise. how to do... well, a hell of a lot for traumatic injuries. doesn’t really help him when he gets a cold. but it’s saved a few lives over the years. including his own.
“--still... doesn’t do a hell of a lot for dry mouth when it’s direct to vein. hence... coffee. rancid or otherwise. as long as it’s hot and wet... it’d do.”
which might just warm him up a little. his body is still fighting to heal, to handle the shock, which means that he’s been feeling pretty damn cold beneath that thin scratchy sheet.
“besides, it’s not like i ain’t been shot before.”
just a couple more scars to add to the menagerie. and a significant few of those had been acquired since he’d arrived in this town. plus, he figures that’s enough of a ‘hint’ for blue to rule out all of his ‘nearest and dearest’. those who got to reside in his blue bubble probably weren’t so inclined to use guns. and he supposes that - yeah - the vampire’s probably already drawn a few conclusions and... doesn’t really care in so far as jace is the one taking the risks. no matter who it’s for. or why.
“so - nah. nothin’ for you to worry about.”
tongue swipes over lips in a fruitless effort to try to hydrate. while he’s sure his body is coping just fine now, that doesn’t make things any more comfortable. so his voice is just as starched as those scratchy sheets.
“why are you here anyway? because i gotta tell ya - if you have a... shaky moment, i don’t think i’m in any fit state for another drinking session out in the woods about now.”