The important thing is moral choice. Evil has to exist along with good, in order that moral choice may operate. Life is sustained by the grinding opposition of moral entities.
Anthony Burgess, A Clockwork Orange
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@ceciditvenator
The important thing is moral choice. Evil has to exist along with good, in order that moral choice may operate. Life is sustained by the grinding opposition of moral entities.
Anthony Burgess, A Clockwork Orange
em--harris:
Feeling her throat constrict in effort to hold back tears, she pretends to busy herself by looking over more charts located at the foot of his bed. None of it really made sense to her and his reply actually made her feel better than anything a doctor could write about his condition. He was still Jace. âIsnât this where you say I should see the other guy? Expect heâs worse off than you?â she murmured, trying to fall into their old routine but ended up falling flat.
She crossed her arms - a unconscious habit she had formed in effort to comfort and protect herself. âI know thatâŚnow. If I could go backâŚâ she looked up to him and all of the typical fight was gone out of composure as she moved a bit closer towards the head of the bed. âMy definition of family was distorted by my father. I shouldnât have put those same expectations on the two of you but I never lied about anything else to you two. I hope you can believe that.â She hesitantly put a hand beside his.
âDamn you for scaring me like thisâŚâ
âtheyâre dead. Â i ainât. Â so iâm callinâ that a win.â
one on one, wasnât a big deal. Â four on one was tougher - especially when they were hunters, especially when heâs trying not to get someone else killed in the process. Â it hadnât been a fun couple of nights.
and yes - heâs pissed. Â real pissed at her. but heâs also not a freakinâ heartless bastard. Â maybe that worry... maybe those slight trembles to her words... were real. Â she looks... a lot more vulnerable... a lot more - fragile - than he thinks heâs ever seen her. Â and while jace buries his hurt in a stony wall of anger - he doesnât exactly want to see her crashing up against it. Â doesnât want her to have to carry any - guilt - because of that lie. Â and yes - he can see why she did it, but heâd thought... maybe heâd hoped - that truth was something that would have come out sooner. Â stumbling on her in the woods like that had been a... shock. Â to say the least.
âmy definition of family is real simple. Â itâs the people close to me. Â the people i -- care -- about. Â the people i trust.â
he pauses. Â gives a small shrug.
âfamily ainât always blood, em. Â so...â
a small sigh. Â some of that wall finally crumbling. Â only the slightest shift of his fingers to slip beneath her hand and curl around it carefully.
â...you gotta trust me if iâm gonna trust you. Â no more secrets. Â okay? Â promise me.â
zacharyhawtorn:
âEven better. At least, a lot less messy.â
And no chances on making things worse while getting Jace here. Maybe the guy, or the ones around him, would learn it one day. He smiled at Jaceâs short reaction. Yeah⌠he had definitely start lecturing again, with someone who probably didnât need it. It seemed like Jace was more or less knowing what he was doing.
âI know itâs not my fault⌠itâs just frustrating. I mean⌠I come from the time we couldnât do better in a lot of cases. Itâs blowing my mind that people still choose to do it that way when weâre so much more progressed now.â
He nodded. So Jace knew, about him and Erik. And he was still here, talking to him. Well, that was at least something.
âYeah, he likes to rub it in from time to time. He doesnât need to, though, I know what Iâve done. And I wish I could undo it.â
He blamed himself enough for it without Erik coming back on it now and then. That was something he would never stop blaming himself for. He just shrugged.
âThatâs what arrogance can do to you. I have Erik as a⌠well⌠more or less living example of what happens when you let it take over.â
And yeah, he could have known it wouldnât be enough for Jace. That he wasnât going to be satisfied when Zach was just trying to pick up his life again. He just couldnât cross a certain line and stand next to Jace. Not if that would put him against Erik. Standing at the other side of Nicolas? Yes, he would be willing to do that, although he knew how that would end, but Erik? No. Not in a million years.
âAnd trust me. I can do something for the victims of the not so normal part of this town as well. Wouldnât be the first time, trust me.â
He had patched up Amber more than once, also when she was hurt by Pandora. He could help other supernaturals. He could even help people like Jace when they had an injury that was harder to explain.
âWouldnât it help you to know there was at least one doctor you could call when something went wrong? I could help you as well, just like your brother. AndâŚâ
He swallowed when he thought of Talia.
âAnd girls like Talia⌠so they donât have to become what she became. So they donât have to die like her.â
He smiled slightly.
âI can get used to the smells⌠I did it before. Iâm just a bit more on edge right now, so Iâll have to find my way back into it. And by the way, the coffee machine is two floors down. I wouldnât recommend you getting your coffee yourself. Yes, I can smell that and no, I wouldnât recommend it. Thereâs more between here and there, you know.â
He grabbed the bell next to Jaceâs bed.
âAnd if youâre to stubborn to push the button to get a cup of coffee, I will, even when itâs just to stop your whining.â
âsome people donât choose to do it that way. Â iâm all for progress, blue - but in the good oleâ u s of a - progress still costs money. Â and sometimes, cold hard cash is harder to come by than a pouch full of tobacco... or a leech.â
it was all well and good for the portion of the populace which had a job. Â who had medical insurance to cover them when they needed it most. Â the people that the rest of america liked to forget about. Â the ones living on the line of choosing between paying rent, or buying groceries to feed their kids. Â hell, the ones who werenât even lucky enough to have that choice.
âdonât forget - not all of us have the luxury of over a century of savings.â
he just shrugs when blue goes on to explain the guilt over his brother.  jace is pretty familiar with the feeling, except itâs one of the things he - doesnât - talk about.  itâs also the reason he was here, in this shittip of a town in the first place.  trying to make it up to him, attempting to make aments - a personal penance of sorts.  and sure, heâd gotten close... real close... but he hadnât killed him.  something - some hind brain thing had stopped him.  had kicked into place ( not soon enough, but not âtoo lateâ either ) and waved a flag and shown him exactly what he was doing -- or, more importantly -- who he was doing it to.
âtechnically - a ânot-livingâ example.â
but he drops it. Â doesnât really want to get tangled up in a one and a bit century old domestic - it really wasnât any of his business.
âpoint is - why wait until âan innocentâ becomes âa victimâ.  the damage is already done - and like you said before, blue -- some of those âscarsâ, the ones you canât see... take a hell of a lot longer to fade... if they ever do.â
he does however, halt at the next words, a catch of inference that has jace sitting even more uncomfortably in the already freakinâ uncomfortable bed, and on hearing them, he does push himself up a little more, trying to sit at least vertical rather than flopped into a couple of lumpy pillows--
â--hold up, whatâd you mean - just like my brother?â
since when did blue a) know tris and b) have any cause to âhelp himâ.  because it sure as hell came across as though he already had.  and last jace can remember, heâs the first - and hopefully ONLY - anderson to make it into arcadia general hospital.
talia -- the girl that died... the first time heâs heard her name mentioned as the one who died, but he HAS heard it before...
âshe was a hunter.â
natalia had mentioned her.  had said she was one of the... âgood onesâ.  okay -- so, jace is more than a little surprised that blue actually communed with other hunters, but that can only be a good thing, right? Â
âas long as there are victims.  thereâll be hunters... like me... maybe like her.  like i said - i was born into this life, raised into it.  but that ainât the common way.  most hunters?  they fall into it.  or get dragged.  they experience the supernatural - and not in a good way.  maybe get attacked.  maybe lose someone they care about... revenge is a pretty cold, hard customer to deal with, blue.  some of them... they just ainât got the knowhow, or the experience to deal with it... they just dive in, headstrong...  and most of âem...â
thereâs a pause. Â because heâs seen more than a few hunters lose their life to a reckless or careless moment. Â not knowing what they were going up against. Â not having the training or the knowledge or the skill to see them through. Â he doesnât believe in âmakingâ someone into a hunter... but if theyâre already in the game, then he does believe in trying his best to make sure they survive for as long as possible....
â...donât make it out the other side.â
âwe ainât exacly a bunch who make it to a pensionable age, blue. Â yâever seen an old hunter? Â nah... because there ainât any. Â and iâm - sorry... Â that she died. Â i really am.â
a pause, a purse of his lips.  it was never good news to hear about a hunter being killed ( even though heâd killed the few whoâd done this to him, but - theyâd pretty much deserved it after what theyâd tried to do to amber - and to him, and at the time, there hadnât been another way ).
âhey! Â this ainât whining! i just donât think that a cup of the hot stuff is too much to ask for after...â
saving a life? Â itâs not like he ever asks for anything in return - doesnât expect it, doesnât want it, but heâd be damned if karma couldnât see itâs way to a cup of coffee.
â...gettinâ shot.â
tatianawitchdoctor:
âSorry, i wasnât aware that the hippocratic oath only worked on the clock.â
She wants to laugh at that kind of naivety in a hunter. Part of her wonders when it was that she lost her own⌠To assume that workplace oaths are binding anywhere and everywhere; to assume that she can afford the luxury of carrying around her day job whenever, wherever. She canât apply these healing hands indiscriminately, not anymore. It isnât noble, but then real life so rarely is. And she canât bring herself to apologize for that day; not when his death couldâve been for the greater good. For Lily, for Arcadia. Still, she flinches when he chips her hands away, prior-knowledge and prejudice making her anticipate pain or some kind of aggression. It doesnât come, but sheâs still rooted in place, evidently wary of trying the hands-on approach again. Instead, her hands were balled into fists as she listened to his venomous tirade.
âWhatâs that supposed to mean?â She interjects, when he tosses out the word âfiguresâ as though any of their interactions this far have fit the predictable bill. But his implication dawns on her a few seconds later and itâs all she can do not to groan and slink out in favour of the nearest cup of knock-out coffee. âFine. Iâm  s o r r y , okay??â She begins again, grappling for the kind of patience neither of them have with each other. âFor yelling at you the other time, at the gun-range.â The words are terse, evidence enough that this isnât easy for her. Not that sheâs naive enough to think itâll get her any points with the steel-hearted hunter. âThat wasnât your fault.â The memory is a bitter one for many reasons, the lesser of them being her ugly run-in with Jace. Thereâs Alaina, first and foremost; for whom the mere recollection brings back a familiar wave of grief. Loneliness too⌠How would Alaina handle this; handle him?⌠Better than her, surely. And then thereâs Remy; whom sheâd found not long after her run-in with Jace⌠Remy, whoâd witnessed the breakdown that she was still trying to suppress in her memory. Asking the necromancer to bring Alaina back had gone against every rule her grandmother had touted, every one sheâd parroted in turn. It was the worst low in her life, and all things considered, she was glad Remy had skipped town not long after.Â
âYou donât decide when my obligations are over.â Thereâs no malice to be found in her voice this time, but the tone remains firm. She doesnât bother to correct him on the chosen adjective either though; on the fact that he is exactly that - not a charity-case, not an empathetic cake-walk - but an obligation, plain and simple. Heâll be her patient as long as it takes to transfer him into another specialistâs care (and given their perpetual state of being short-staffed, there was no telling when thatâd be) - or to authorize his release. The sights of him suggest that wonât be ASAP either. âIâm  s o r r y , okay? I know that you hate it - and me. I get that. Iâm not gonna keep you in here any longer than I have to either. Can you please just⌠Get back into bed??â For a few days, or just the one. For a few hours, or just fifteen minutes, at this point. Ample time for her to finish the check-up and rally-race her way out of here.
âthe hell i donât.â
a sharp reply when she talks about her âobligationsâ... the rest, heâs still thinking about.  heâs not sure heâd ever hear the word âsorryâ fall from her lips - that were usually too busy demeaning or screaming or lying.  so forgive him if heâs taking it with a slight pinch of salt right about now.  but there were three strikes on that card... and only two apologies.  the worst, sheâs yet to bring up - the time she lied about the ambulance.  and he imagines that she would have probably rather seen him brought in here on a body bag than a gurney.
he does push back up to his feet - slowly, wincing slightly as he goes, one hand pressed firmly against the worst of his wounds, an oddly familiar wet, warmth seeping beneath his fingers and starting to stain the stupid ass flashing gown that heâd been put in. Â he has no clue where his clothes are, not that theyâd be in any state to wear. Â so the gown would just have to damn well do. Â hell, heâd made it from the barn back to the car, back to the house then handled a werewolf on the turn while bleeding out - he could walk out of this fucking building.
âin case it wasnât clear - iâm discharging myself doc.  as of - right now.  donât exactly need to be in the âcareâ of someone who -- doesnât.â
he does manage a slightly bitter laugh though - grabbing for the little clipboard at the bottom of his bed and tearing off the top sheet with notes of meds, fluids, obs... turning it over and scrawling with the blue biro that was snugged in the clip, dictating as one hand makes a shaky scrawl.
âi, do hereby discharge myself from arcadia general hospital. Â signed -- jace anderson.â
the paper is crumpled, and he tosses it onto the bed, a smear of red staining one corner.
âitâs official, you no longer need to worry about your -- reputation, doc.â
because that was clearly the most important thing here. Â not actually helping people. Â itâs all about appearances.
âyâknow - hate is a strong word. Â i tried to just... be nice. Â to get to know you? Â no preconception, no judgement, nada. Â but you sure as hell havenât returned the favour and you certainly ainât given me one single goddamn reason to âlikeâ you. Â but you just go ahead and make up your own mind about how i feel, why donâtcha? Â youâve already made up your mind about everythinâ else to do with me. Â why stop now?â
the floor is cold beneath his bare feet. Â and heâs pretty sure that heâs going to be a hell of a lot colder by the time he walks from here, all the way back to the crapshack on the edge of town. Â no clothes. Â no wallet. Â no money for a cab ( not that theyâd take a bleeding guy in a hospital gown anyway ), no phone to call for a ride.
âwhatever bug you have up your ass bout me... sure as hell does carry a lot of hate now, donât it?  and - i tried to work out what it was that iâd done.  maybe iâd said something wrong, maybe iâd fucked up real bad... but yâknow - i havenât.  and considerinâ you seem to think you know a hell of a lot about me, makes me think that that -- hate -- was in full flow before i even set foot in this town.  so iâm still wonderinâ doc -- if your little screaming pitch at the range wasnât my fault, then what is my fault, huh?â
though the âsorryâ did sound a little like she was about to choke on it - but heâs not ready to just drop everything and accept those bitterly offered apologies at any kind of face value - there was more to this than a quick bitchfit.  sheâd known about him.  known what he was.  who he was.  and he wants to know -- why.
âhow about you save the apologies and just try the truth for once.â
em--harris:
Of course he was still angry at her.
Wouldnât be Jace if he wasnât. And as odd as it sounded, she felt relieved to see the familiar spark of anger in the man - she felt like she could breathe again. She hadnât realized she had been holding her breath since she got the news that it was the older Anderson in the hospital.
âCame to see just how bad your ass had been kicked for you to wind up in this place,â she replied without hesitation, her response almost automatic as if this was just a normal conversation between the two of them. Like nothing had changed, but his expression said otherwise.
Her eyes went from chart to monitor and then to the man in the bed, her expression softening drastically as she let out another shaky breath as emotions overwhelmed her.
âI didnât know if I would find you in one pieceâŚ.â
oh jesus. Â
he might be bedbound and hooked up to all kinds of beeping crap. Â might be a little numb on the super jolly cocktail of painkillers he has. Â but heâs still a hunter, and even now, heâs sharp enough to catch that small hitch in her breath, the waver to her words. Â itâs like a punch to the goddamn gut. Â
he wants nothing more than to reach out and tell her that itâs okay. Â that she doesnât need to be scared... but heâs... not convinced - canât be. Â wonât let himself get suckered in by another charade. Â he just canât afford to take that risk.... Â for all he knows itâs just another spin on the lie. Â crocodile tears to try to fill the gap where sheâd betrayed their trust.
âmâstill here. Â thatâs pretty much as good as it gets.â
thereâs none of his usual joking.  no light quip about being âtough as old bootâsâ or whatever else he might have normally said.  but that was all just dancing around the elephant in the room.
âyâknow... i get it. Â i get why you didnât tell us, em. Â at first. Â but then... after that... we were supposed to be... family. Â you - know - us. Â and hell, if not me, then at least tris. Â you know how he--â
--feels about you--
â--is.â
thexdarkxwithin:
She finds herself grinning and a small spark of the familiar Amber that is usually present in his company, does surface for a minute. Which is exactly how she is, never really truly staying down for longâeven though some might find that a little more difficult to believe if they donât know her because yes, the young wolf can be grumpy and quick to jump down someones throat.
âYour punsâŚ.seriously cornyâŚbut definitely my kindâŚââand they are. Time and time again she has blurted out the corniest pun and even laughed at her own humour.
Itâs only when he closes his eyes as though he is imagining it, does she actually laugh and nudge himânot hard and hopefully not enough to cause anything to hurt, but itâs damn impossible for her to constantly hold off from doing something that actually does come automatic for her.
âOh donât worryâŚmy imagination can conjure up a few things which would make the freakinâ pope pass out.â Thereâs a quick wink just as he opens one eye and Amber sports one of her slightly lop-sided smirks.
Having a stash of cash for emergencies, or maybe when you havenât quite found the time to hustle a few gamesâŚor in Ambers case, other illegal means as well, is a great idea. Only she would know it was there if it was hers and that would make her lazy and end up spending it anyway. The only control and respect she seems to have for cash is when itâs that of those she cares about. Loyalty does come in strong there and swindling is definitely out of the window.
âFuckinâ smart idea if you ask me. Even though Iâm hoping you aint gonna be suddenly âgetting out of dodgeâ anytime soon, I will still make sure whatever I take is replaced okayâŚâ Thereâs no questioning tone at the end of her words, purely because it is more of a statement on her part.
The candy is quite frustrating actually, itâs far too hard and she literally has to chomp down on the elastic too to break it. Yet she still does so, determined with an unwarranted stubbornness that she will not be defeated in stripping it bare apart from the oblong candy watch face.
âEdible jewellery is more for kids..edible underwear is more for the kinksters amongst the adult nation.â She offers him a smirk. âHave you eaten any?..I always wondered what it tasted likeâŚrice paper?âŚor maybe gelatin stuffâŚ.â Looking at him, the young wolf nods and smirks. âHell yesâŚwhen you are up and about, I think you need the full works, a greasy quarterpounder with cheese and baconâŚ.side order of friesâŚdouble friesâŚand obviously you gotta wash it all down with a few beersâbecause well itâs the rules aint it.â
When she hears him tell her about Tristan and the relationship the brothers have between them right now, Ambers expression remains serious. âWell maybe coming here is what you both need, but things can take a while. Youâd both still put your life on the line for the other, right?âŚ.because that speaks volumes if the answer is yes.â Amber has had her fair share of things happen with her own brother and maybe it isnât as bad as the Andersons, then again, he hasnât really said what. She has nearly killed Connor on a full moon though and even though she isnât in control of her wolf at that time, it was her fault she wasnât restrained that one night in the past.
Her hand reaches to just rest on the top of his and she strokes across the knuckles before letting go again. Itâs enough to show some affection, but it doesnât linger enough to come across as what she might call soppy. âHeyâŚwellâŚI aint gonna judge you, JaceâŚ.none of us are innocentâwe all have dark stuff we would sooner not see the lightâŚespecially around this town apparentlyâŚ.including me.â
âThen I will drop by the house this evening before dark and see if he is around..because does he know youâre here?âhe will no doubt be worried as fuck if not.â Tristan did come across as a more than reasonable guy to be fair, especially how they first met. âWhen he was just a stranger in townâŚdid he tell you a swiped his wallet?â Sheâs not sure the younger Anderson brother has said anything about itâbut itâs not something she is about to try and hide. âHe had a shitload of fake I.Dâs in his wallet and I was like, âwhat the hell??ââŚ.but he found me and I gave it backâthat was before I knew you both.â She knows it aint right to steal, fraud people etcâŚbut itâs not something she would dream of doing to any of them now.
Raising both brows as her visual shoots between him and the TV, Amber blinks and smirks. âWhat?..the mighty mexicanâŚ.what?âŚI aint ever heard of that, so the days of our lives has gotta trump it.â She casually leans over and takes the still relatively hot coffee of his and has a sip before giving it back.
âmy puns are a work of genius.â
he says with the utmost confidence.  they obviously arenât - but hey heâs gonna take the credit for a bad sense of humour.  childish and at times a bit silly.  but if you abandoned all âsillyâ things then life just took on a dreadful, dreary shade of grey.  no fun.  nothing just to smile about.  he does, however, huff out a bit of a cautious chuckle at her next comparison... maybe she meant - sailors - or pirates - or some other sea-bound swarthy sex crazed stereotype...Â
âthe pope?  you seriously need a better metaphor than âthe popeâ sparky.  if thereâs anyone who wouldnât be able to handle that amount of âimaginationâ, itâd be the holy-man.â
he just shrugs at the notion of having a little put by.  it made sense to him with the kind of lifestyle he had.  that, and the fact, heâs not only looking out for himself, but his brother.  and as much as it might be nice to have some kind of âsupernatural survivalâ advantage - being a human meant that the basics still needed to be taken care of.  food... shelter... water...  that and he hadnât had a couple of hundred years to build up an investment portfolio like some of the vampires... so having a little hard cash to see you through a rough spell was handy.
âcouldnât get out of dodge even if i wanted to, sparky. Â weâre still rainchecked for vegas, remember? Â unless the bubble went pop and i dunno about it...â
not that he would.  oh, sure - heâs been sorely tempted to just say âfuck âem allâ and just leave them to the shitstorm they caused for themselves.  but thatâs not really how it works.  because there were still people... innocents... who would get caught in that crossfire.  human blood spilled through no fault of their own - other than choosing the wrong town to settle down in.  the humans... and others.  like amber.
he doesnât need to think so hard about her next question though.
ânope - generally, on occasions like that, iâm too busy with - other things, besides - why would i want candy when i could have cherry pie?â
and at that, jaces grin slips from something innocent to something decidedly devilish.  but it falters a little as she reaches out to offer him some comfort.  heâs not entirely sure he deserves any comfort.  not after what happened.  and heâs really not sure about the âfixableâ part... but he hopes.  just hopes... that maybe things might get better.  even if there hasnât been much sign of it up till now.  so thereâs just a silence, a small nod at the question of putting his life on the line for his brother.  always.  at any time.  though heâs not so sure that it works the other way -- and at the same time, heâs not sure he wants it to. Â
âdunno if he knows.â
jace sure as hell hadnât been able to call him. Â no phone. Â no money for a payphone. Â not that heâd been able to get out of bed to find one anyway. Â and he doesnât exactly want to hand out tristans number to the hospital for their records.
âbut, nope - he never said anything about a stolen wallet - fake idâs are a hunterâs bread and butter. Â so thatâs not really surprising - giveaway 101. Â but if yâall sorted it out between you then no harm, no foul. Â though iâll be sure to give him some shit for fallinâ foul to a pickpocket.â
thereâs a small smile as he tries to look on the more positive side. Â and careful shift in the bed, moving to one side to give amber a little more room on the uncomfortable mattress to sit and see the tv.
âtelenovella... itâs like a soap opera. Â but with more drama. Â and there are usually a lot of people screaming at each other in spanish. Â theyâre amazing. Â and quite often the only thing that you can get tuned into on motel tv.â
zacharyhawtorn:
âI think Iâm kind of glad that⌠someone managed to drag your ass in here.â
Somehow he had the feeling that was more or less how it would have to go to get Jace to lie down in a bed and let professionals do the job for hem. And ok, heâd admit it was a lot easier to report to the hospital with a bullet wounds than with pretty suspicious bite wounds, that too.
âSeriously, tobacco. And other things Iâm not even sure I want to identify. I can see the leeches working⌠I mean⌠Iâve seen more than just modern medicine in my life. Actually⌠I have worked with them, when I was still human.â
The new methods often were more effective, but he knew better than practically any doctor around that the old methods werenât completely useless either. If you couldnât go to a hospital, like Jace often said, that might work.
âYou maybe not. But my antipathy against home medicine comes from all those guys who think they can treat cancer with herbs. Iâve done that. I had to do that, all those years ago. Iâve seen how the mortality rates of diseases like that decrease over time and sometimes I wish they would have seen what Iâve seen. Itâs not personal towards you, itâs just⌠itâs frustrating, you know. Seeing someone close to dying, or in a best case scenario weâre able to keep them alive but amputate and arm or a leg and knowing that if they just had come in earlier, we could have saved them.â
He started to laugh a bit when he heard himself talk.
âSorry. Lectures kind of come naturally to me. Itâs driving my brother crazy.â
Then he shrugged, somehow glad with Jaceâs reaction. He wasnât overreacting after Taliaâs death. He had a right to be let down by it, he had a right to grieve. Not as much as Theo had, but still⌠He had lost someone important as well.
âI know I could have done something. I cheat, remember? I try not to, but donât think I wouldnât have thought twice about cheating to save her.â
After reading the autopsy report, he was pretty sure he wouldnât even have bothered with playing doctor⌠heâd have fed her his blood, no matter how she would have thought about it at that time, no matter how dangerous it would have been. He would have watched her closely afterwards to prevent her from becoming a vampire by accident, but he would have done it.
âAnd you clearly donât know me well enough, man. I still carry the guilt for something Iâve done hundred fifty years ago. No, itâs not what I should do, but apparently thatâs how I roll. I need more than a few weeks to get rid of the idea I could have done something.â
He would, eventually. He hadnât killed Talia, like he had killed Erik. He just hadnât been there. That wasnât something that could haunt him for an eternity. Heâd recover.
âI know itâs better not to get hurt int he first place, itâs just⌠I canât stop everything and everyone whoâs trying to harm someone. Itâs not just supernaturals, you know. Drunk drivers, people who just mean evil. I can help those victims as well.â
He wasnât that naive to think he could stop people from getting hurt. There would always be something⌠even the good supernaturals slipped. He wasnât suicidal. He didnât want Jace to end all supernaturals, because that would mean ending him too.
âThatâs probably your job yeahâŚâ
âsomeone - managed to call for an ambulance.â
he hadnât been âdraggedâ anywhere... but that aside, jace was pretty damn grateful for it too - and itâs probably obvious in his tone - lacking any harsh bite and something more of relief instead.  he does, however, take a moment for a breather - because even talking was a little tiring right now.  that, and the fact that his throat still felt like sandpaper, his mouth parched, voice hoarse and rasping.  heâd be forever wondering if while he was out of it, that the world had somehow run out of that joyous little bean... that, or perhaps coffee was just a fantastic hallucination and in the waking world it had never existed at all.
either way... the words roll on. Â not so much point or purpose to them, just blue sharing a little about his thoughts. Â this... is probably what normal people do. Â just have - normal conversations. Â about normal things. Â about the strangeness of people when dealing with sickness or hurt... Â he doesnât really blame them ( other than the pointlessly real stupid ones ) - sometimes desperate times brought out the strangest things. Â though at the notion of lecturing, jace does allow himself the luxury of sound - a brief snort.
âiâd noticed.â
he does purse his lips... dry lips, that feel a little rough when he finally speaks.
âthatâs just the thing though. Â canât save a limb because someone left it too long. Â that was their choice - not yours... so... you do the best you can with what you got.â
thereâs a soft sigh at the notion of âcheatingâ -- yeah, jace knows exactly what heâs talking about. Â not so long ago someone had âcheatedâ to save his life. Â he couldnât really say that if he had that kind of power - that he wouldnât risk it himself - take the chance to save a life. Â
thereâs a brief pause.  jace looking back up at the vampire at that notion of âguiltâ.  because yeah, heâs aware now - of what happened. Â
âi know what you did. Â he told me.â
in no uncertain terms and without a great deal of understanding about - why... jace seems to recall the word âselfishâ being used.  and for all he might be tempted to use healing blood to help save a life - jace still isnât sure if he could have gone that far... salvation?  or condemnation?  to be a vampire for the rest of eternity.  he doesnât think he could do that to someone... especially not his brother...  so, no - he doesnât get it.  but heâs not really trying to - itâs not really any of his business to go poking around in theirs.  heâs not going to understand what happened between them a century and a half ago - only that it did and... here they are now.  and at least... one of them... is trying to do... something.
ânormal people have normal doctors to help them when normal shit happens to âem.  what they donât got is a lot of people willinâ to stand up for âem when something ânot-normalâ comes callinâ --  ainât a lot of medicine that can fix that - cheatinâ or otherwise.â Â
thereâs not a lot of argument behind his tone.  heâs not going to try to persuade him otherwise anymore.  itâd be something else if the supernatural took a stance... and he knows a few who are trying to - but a little like the hunter... the âhumanâ hunter that jace was... the odds werenât the greatest.  not everyone liked to be on the side of the underdogs.  but as far as jace was concerned there was no âprobablyâ about it.
âso yeah - it is my job.â
âbut you seem to be holdinâ up okay. Â can only imagine what kind of smells youâre gonna experience in this place. Â it ainât exactly pleasant for me - and i ainât the one with the super senses...â
â...otherwise i might have sniffed out that damn coffee machine...â
em--harris:
When Tatiana had informed her that a hunter was in the hospital, Emmaâs heart had dropped as her mind raced to who it could be and just how badly he or she must be. A hunter never went to the hospital freely. It was typically only in life or death situations. She texted both Tristan and Lily and heard back from both of them by the time she reached the hospital and finally had her answer. Jace.
She paced outside of his hospital room for quite a while as she debated what to do. If things were like they used to be, she would barge in and just give him a hard time for getting his ass kicked so hard he wound up in a hospital. But this wasnât like it used to be. Their last parting words were nothing but anger.
He could have died and their last words were angry. Shit.
Pushing aside all her mixed feelings, she entered his room just as he was asking for a cup of coffee. Typical. It wouldnât be long before he was harassing the nurses. âYou look like hell,â she observed as she finally came face to face with her friend, holding back a wince at how bad he looked. She hadnât seen him like this in a long time. Emma paused at the foot of his cot, not sure how close to get.
she was about the last person he though would walk on into this room. Â the last person who he probably wanted to walk into this room. Â itâs not as though he hates her ( jesus - she was... sheâd... been... family... ) - but right now, she makes him real, real, fuckinâ angry. Â perhaps sheâs just cleverer than he gave her credit for. Â sheâd managed to fool him and his brother for over a year after all... sheâd picked her moment well, when heâs at his weakest... most tired. Â most hurt... Â because he canât exactly summon the energy for another bout of snappish venom. Â
at the same time though -- he canât really bring himself to believe that sheâs here because she... cares. Â canât believe that the lie didnât go further than the secret heâd discovered. Â because if she could lie about that... she could lie about everything else - right? Â and that hurts more than the damn gunshots. Â it hurts more than anything that left a physical scar. Â it hurts - because it takes a LOT for jace to put his trust in someone... and he had... Â and just look how thatâd turned out...
âwhat dâyou want?â
tristan-anderson1:
It was clear to Tristan that Jace was unhappy with him, he knew that he had been distant lately, it wasnât something he was doing on purpose, it was just something he had kinda just fell into really. Tristan let Jace do his thing, he was listening, but he couldnât help but to let his thoughts run away from him when it came to the news about Emma, of course Jace didnât understand his thought process, Jace didnât know that he and Emma had spent that night together.
Tristan had heard the other things Jace had said about this town they were in, so he decided to push his other thoughts back for now and focus on their main problem, Arcadia.
Tristan looked at Jace, â I get it Jace, Iâm sorry, I havenât been in the right head space lately, I admit that and Iâll own up to that,â he said, â I just havenât been feeling like myself much lately, I havenât for a while actually, but right now thatâs not important.â he said to his older brother, he ran a hand through his hair and let out a long breath.Â
âwe - were supposed to come here to do this together and â gotta tell you kiddo â there ainât been so much of a âweâ, lately.â
Tristan knew Jace was right, they havenât been much of a team lately, not since Jace went dark, it wasnât for lack of trying on either part either, it was just how things played out. All Tristan wanted was to get back to the way they were before all that mess went down, but clearly it was easier said than done. It was just something they had to work through and they only way to do that is for him to get back into the flow of things again.
Tristan frowned at what Jace said next, â Even if that was the case, no one ever leaves the hunter life, and even if it was possible to do so, Iâm too deep in it.â he said, he knew nothing else, he only knew how to be a hunter, he was raised in the life and he was going to die in it too, he accepted that a long time ago.
â Jace, I donât want to walk away, and youâre right, since all that happened things havenât been easy for either of us, but even so, weâve never given up before and Iâm not planning on giving up now. Youâre still my brother, even when you werenât yourself you were my brother, we didnât go through all that and the consequences of it to just give up now.â he said, â Things have been difficult for me since that night, Iâm not going to deny that, and yeah, sometimes it takes its toll, but Iâm working through that and I think what might help is if we work together to get back to how it was before, or something close to it.â
â The people in this town need us.â That much was clear to him as well, he may not be aware of everything going on in this town like Jace did, but he was ready to get back to work, â Iâm in, so lets get to work.â he said.
it was clear to jace that tristan wasnât listening to a damn word he was saying. Â or just hearing the bits he wanted to hear.
âno - it is important.  since when have we ever had the luxury of âme timeâ?  if itâs something that has you distracted enough to be wanderinâ the streets readinâ poetry to daisies - or whatever it is that youâve been doinâ - while people are dyinâ and this whole town is on some kind of magical lockdown then -- yeah - it is important.â
he does take another drink from his glass, letting it idle between his fingers before moving back to take a seat on the other side of the counter... letting out a long sigh, softening his tone and fixing his little brother with a pointed look.
âiâll always be your brother.  no matter what.  but that ainât gonna stop you makinâ your own decisions about stuff.  and the last time we swept somethinâ under the carpet and went on like everythinâ was fine -- well, that didnât turn out so great - did it?  and that oneâs on me, man... i know it is.  secrets never work out so well between us.  so if thereâs somethinâ on your mind... then maybe itâd be easier to deal with if there were two of us...âÂ
lips pursed for a moment it canât have been the news about emma that was bothering him - because theyâd only just found that out - and it was pretty clear from his brothers reaction that he hadnât known either... and whatever it was that was on tristanâs mind had been there long before that -- pretty much from the moment they got to this goddamn godforsaken town.
âiâve been here, tris. Â i told you iâd do anything to make it up to you. Â and iâve been here... for... a year now and...â
he just shrugs. Â tristan wasnât the only one of the brothers who was dealing with what had happened that night.
â...iâm just tryinâ to do my best, man. Â so if you wanna do this, great - i mean that - but we do it properly... no more secrets. Â head 100% in the game from here on out - right?â
zacharyhawtorn:
âYeah, right⌠sounds like you needed to be here. Good thing youâre at least not too stubborn to admit that muchâŚâ
There werenât a lot of people who did home medicine who knew that well what had to be done. At least, he hadnât met them. It made him a bit more at ease with the way the hunter treated himself, even when Zach would prefer him to find professional help most of the time instead of just those instances he almost died.
âTrust me, if youâve seen a guy come in who treated a leg wound with chewed tabacco, youâd be wary of everyone who thinks they can do my job as well.â
He nodded.Â
âJust thirsty then. Well, I donât think I can get you a cup of coffee, but there is a tap over there. If you settle for some water, I can get it for you. If you want more⌠well, the red button is your best friend for that.â
This whole aftercare thing⌠he wasnât good at that. He usually just patched people up and sent them home, or to one of the wards where others took care of them.
âI know. Or at least, I suspected. Although I thought you had more experience in bite wounds than in bullets, to be honest.â
And well, a bullet meant that at least Erik wasnât involved. He didnât even know if his brother knew how to use a gun, but he was sure that he preferred using his teeth or his strength to kill than a gun.
He shrugged. Why was he here? Because he was crazy enough to think he was ready for it? Because Taliaâs death made it impossible for him to sit and watch any longer?
âA friend of me died⌠a very dear friend, actually. And⌠well⌠it might be some kind of wake up call that I canât stand by anymore. I wasnât able to save her, when I probably could have done it when I would have been there when it happens. But there are tons of people being brought into the ER, so Iâm actually trying to see if I can manage to be here without losing myself. I want to get back here, Jace. I want to heal people again.â
âpretty much. Â if it werenât for...â
amber. Â but he darenât mention her name. Â he knows she sees blue as a friend, but at the same time, heâs not about to go blurting it out to anyone. Â if she wanted to say something about it, it was really her business...Â
â...someone -Â helping me out, i think that maybe iâd have had to take my chances with a staple gun and a quart of bourbon. Â probably wouldnât be here talkinâ to you right now. Â didnât really have much time to put any of those -- skills -- to use.â
heâs a hunter, yeah. Â but heâs still human. Â not infallible, not invincible and - yeah - sometimes he needs help too. Â at the same time, a patch up job wasnât a clean and clear road to recovery. Â for all jace mostly dealt with his own injuries himself, he couldnât look after other people... hunters were pretty much transient by nature... and he didnât have the know-how or the resources to take it any further than making sure they... survived.
â--seriously though-- tobacco? Â theyâd have been better off with leeches. Â old fashioned as it is, they still have some medicinal properties at least. Â donât get me wrong, blue - i canât do your job. Â i donât do your job. Â i just do mine. Â and - sometimes, that means patching people up until i can get them somewhere where they can be looked after properly. Â somewhere like this.â
jace just attempts a small shrug... most of the scars that map his skin have been gained from torn flesh caused by fangs or claws - one really odd one just below his right butt cheek where heâd mis-timed a jump over a fence and speared his own ass on a sharp bit of metal... Â but two bullet wounds before these two... and still, they remained in the minority of his strange collection of injuries.
âgenerally - yeah... most things i go up against tend to want to tear me into itty bitty pieces with pointy canines or thing iâm the next best thing to a chew toy... Â but -- sometimes...â
one hand lifts and he makes a âshooty gunâ motion with his fingers.
however... his hand hovers in the air for a moment - not entirely sure heâs hearing what he thinks heâs hearing. Â
âjesus -- wow... iâm... sorry, man.  but yâknow -- even if youâre âin thisâ... out there... tryinâ to make things better, yâcanât be everywhere at once.  i ainât saying you could have done something... or that you couldnât have... but one thing i know for sure, is that carryinâ around a chunk of blame -- ainât gonna do you any favours when youâre tryinâ to get yourself into a better place.â
yeah, jace is real familiar with carrying blame. Â the words come from a place heâs been - a place where, a big part of him - still is. Â and sure, itâs easy to offer those words to the vampire, not so easy to follow them himself. Â but wasnât that always the case?
âstill think itâs a better idea to try to stop âem gettinâ hurt in the first place...â
a point on which theyâd - apparently - forever disagree. Â violence, hurt, harm, trauma... they wouldnât need patching up if there wasnât any of that in the first instance. Â a small shrug - at least blue was actually doing something. Â ... or well, thinking about doing something. Â which is - he supposes - a small improvement over not thinking about doing anything at all.
â...i guess thatâs my part of the job though, as much as this is yours.â
thexdarkxwithin:
How she is right now, itâs difficult for Amber. She is used to putting on a front and appearing to the world as some mouthy little blonde who either comes across as hyperactive, or quiet and bad tempered. What some fail to realise is, when she is bad tempered, itâs usually to cover a whole host of emotions or worries she has in her mind. She clings to anger and wears it like armour, letting people see she is to be avoidedânot bothered withâsomeone to not be around. Yet peel away the armourâfind that chink in it and it becomes a whole different story.
Jace has found it and thatâs why as she sits there, it is hard for her to wear the mask she usually portrays.
âThereâs no urge to cover it with angerâno burst of energy to prove everything is peachy and whilst she thinks the latter might be a bad thing, Amber knows it also means he has got closer to her than she ever thought anyone would be able to.
Through all that has happened, she is still smiling, albeit itâs a tired one, but to achieve that, it definitely has to be the company she is in.
âWellâŚwhat you said back at the house about a nurses uniform tooâŚI thought I might get oneâŚbut then..wellâŚseeing you nowâI think it would be a bad idea.â
Sheâs teasing him and that is clear by the smirk which graces her face.
âBecause you still aint so wellâŚand I think if I donned one for youâthose machines would start bleeping like hellâblood pressure would rise..not to mention something else wouldâand I would cause more freakinâ damage than goodâŚso you will have to use that vivid imagination I know you have, sweetheart.â
Amber shoots him a wink.
âAt least for nowâŚ.â Because apart from the real nurses, she really doesnât see anyone else entering his room dressed like that. âDamn those nurses..I meanâŚwho the hell in their right freakinâ mind can resist your charm?â
The young wolf grins, fully joining in on the joking he is doing and this is something she welcomes so much because at one point in his houseâŚthat nightâŚwellâŚnoâŚshe refuses the thought to enter her headâbut it still keeps trying to every so often.
âYou keep an emergency stash of cash in the trunk?â She is about to say no and she will manage just fine, when itâs as though he knows her too damn well and mentions that the money hasnât been obtained through proper means. To her, this makes all the difference. âWellâŚmaybe I will use some of itâŚbut only on the understanding that it will be all back within a day or two.â Which basically means she will make some money that wonât be from legitimate sources either.
Chewing on the candy, Amber canât say that it really tastes awesome, but perhaps itâs enough sugar to perk her up for a short whileâthis is her logic anyway. Amusement etches her face however when she sees his expression.
âItâs some candy bracelet-come-watch thingâŚ.some kid gave me itâŚwell did a deal for a pin badge on my jacket.â Amber empties the elastic and just leaves the square candy watch face. âHereâŚthis is for youâŚ.â Reaching over him, she places it on the cabinet on the other side of his bed. âDoesnât beat burgersâŚor pizzaâŚbut itâs all yours.â
If she is truthful, then she is relieved she didnât have to answer all of the questions that Jace had to. More than likely she would have screwed up on some of them, or what sounds very realistic is she would have lost her temper. When she canât explain properly or gets backed into a corner, the young wolf starts lashing out verbally and sometimes physically.
âThereâs something to be said for memory loss due to injuryâŚâ
Her line of vision follows to where he is pointing and she moves slightly, picking up the clipboard and looking at all of his notes. Her brow raises on some points and others, well her expression just looks confused. She doesnât know what half of the medical terms mean..thatâs generousâshe doesnât know what three quarters of it means. So she places it back at the end of the bed and scrunches her nose up. âWell you are on the mendâŚthatâs all I give a shit about.â
âpromises. Yeah, she heard plenty before and most have been broken, which makes Amber quite wary usually. Yet she believed him and trusted him when he made a promise to her.
âI know you donâtâŚI meanâŚfrom what I know of youâŚI can tell you donât..â She looks at him and in her eyes itâs clear to see she is grateful to him, but they both know these kind of words donât always need to be spoken out loud.
Slouching her shoulders a little, the young blonde kicks her shoes off and lets them drop to the floor, listening as he speaks about Tristan. âOf course he likes youâŚheâs your broâŚunless you have had shit happen between youâŚâ Itâs not something she is about to ask him. From previous chats, Amber knows that if he wants to say then he will do. âI donât know him that well..but he seems a caring guy I thinkâŚ.and you canât share a house willingly if you donât get along.â
He gives her something to think about when he talks of the hunters and how they work. She really doesnât like the idea that some could still be alive or others are there waiting for someone to return. Amber can sometimes jump in feet first and be far too impulsive, but luckily with being sat there with him, it gives her time to think it through and whilst she probably would still attempt it on her ownâshe makes her own promise to say she will ask someone to go with her.
âI will okay?âŚIâll ask someoneâŚsort it all outâŚget rid of the mess and then I will come back here.â She nods and throws a smile his way. âI promise.â
Letting her gaze linger on him, she then grins and grabs the remote. âLet me look what crappy daytime TV has to offer.â Pressing the power button, the TV comes on. She canât normally watch shows or movies for very long before her attention starts to wander, but if he doesnât mind that, she doesnât either. âBet you like âdays of our livesâ, donât ya?â Her brow wiggles and she lets out a small chuckle, moving back a little so she can rest against the headboard.
âhey, donât you worry sparky - a nurses uniform will always be cause for a âriseâ -- in blood pressure or otherwise, no matter what state iâm in at the time.  -- texas... alaska... and the ones in between.â
what? Â just because heâs been shot doesnât mean that heâs suddenly lost his knack for terrible puns... câmon. Â and at the notion of using his imagination ( which can be horribly vivid sometimes, enough to give the hunter reason to wake from sleep, covered in sweat for a less than pleasant reason, it can also be put to use for some more -- entertaining pursuits... ) -- jace just eases back a little into his pillow, lets his eyes drift shut and smirks...
âoh, yeah... now THAT i can do...â
he squicks one eye open and chuckles... which is probably not a good thing because something gives a slight twinge, making itâs presence known above the cocktail of drugs currently dosing him up. but at her next question, jace shakes off the pretence and offers a slightly cautious shrug ( so as not to jostle or pull on anything else ) -Â
âbeen caught in a pinch a couple of times. Â just means that if yâall gotta get out of dodge quick sharp, then thereâs somethinâ to tide over until the next hustle.â
he didnât blow his money so easily.  hunting wasnât exactly a âpaidâ profession.  it didnât come with medical insurance for damn sure, so heâs gonna have to fake something for the hospital bills - run it up on a fake credit card and let some corporation bank take the hit.  it was a kind of shitty thing to do, but it was about the only option he had.  so if there was ever anything coming his way, from a hustle or otherwise, it just seemed smart to try to make that cash go as far as possible.  and ten dollars here, twenty there, into that stash in the trunk, mounted up over time.  he doesnât apologise for it.  isnât apologetic about it.  hell, heâs probably saved more lives than half of the consultants in this damn ER, solved more cases than most cops on the force ( though he canât exactly go around announcing either of those facts )... and while they got to go home, to a family, to a home, probably a mortgage and bills and a tidy little pension waiting for them when they retired... kids and soccer club... jace just moved on to the next job.  it wasnât the easiest life... but it was his life.  somehow... he doesnât think amber would begrudge him any of it... not the hustling.  not the bit of money in that .44 case.  not the parts of it that were... fake... because they had to be.  because at least here - with her - thereâs no fakeness.  itâs just -- r e a l.
there is, however a squint as the elastic pings from her teeth - sans candy - and she tugs off the small item.
âi mean - iâve heard of edible underwear before - but i donât think iâve ever seen edible - jewellery?â
the little âwatchâ face is a pasty yellow colour and it makes a âclankâ as itâs dropped onto the side table.  possibly something that might chip a tooth at a push, but as soon as he had any appetite, heâd probably try it ( free candy after all... ).
âthanks - so far iâve gotten all of my nutrition in some nasty liquid form... from a syringe. Â so anything thatâs actually - edible...â
...though judging by the look of the watch, that was debatable...
â...will make a nice change. Â and if you think that i ainât havinâ the biggest, greasiest cheeseburger as soon as iâm out of this joint? Â then you donât know me so well.â
he does snort slightly at her comment about memory loss, this time making sure to move his hand to where the worst bullet hole was patched over so there was no discomfort.
âcâmon sparky - professional bullshitter here.  ainât the first time iâve used the whole âmemory lossâ thing as an excuse...â
he does grin, but this is probably the first time heâs actually lost enough blood to make it so believable. Â six units was... not a small amount. Â but at the next topic of conversation, he does wince. Â itâs not a physical pain, but a rather vivid memory. Â one that scared him... even now. Â some shit? Â yeah, that and all the rest. Â heâs already told amber that he used to hunt without mercy. Â he hasnât told her that that darkness almost caused him to lose his own brother -- no... thatâs not right... to - kill - his own brother. Â heâd come - so close...
âsome stuff happened between us. Â some... real bad stuff... thatâs why we came here. Â to try to fix it. Â i... donât know how - fixable - it is though. Â so we... share a house. Â barely see him. Â i donât know so much if weâre living with each other... or just - around - each other...â
at some point, his gaze had shifted, down to knuckles that were folded over those starched sheets. Â still red and bearing the cuts from the door that had been blasted apart by the shotgun. Â but jesus - sheâs not his confessional... so... the words just trail off to be followed by something inert.
âheâs a good guy. Â a real good guy. Â if you can get him to come with then heâll do right by you. Â i know him well enough for that.â
itâs just a shame that he canât exactly place himself in that same category.  jace -- isnât -- a âgood guyâ.  not after what heâs done... Â
so he just gives a small nod at the promise. Â offers a slightly smaller smile. Â then just as quick as his own melancholy clouds his thoughts, itâs gone again, shaken off, pushed aside.
âdamn right i do. Â days of our lives is the bomb -- which might only be trumped by the mighty mexican telenovella.â
moonchildshawn:
âIt is what seems like, yesâ
He wasnât holding grudges, but he also wasnât a pushover, they had just one pleasant conversation, the other times he didnât exactly treat Shawn very well. So he wouldnât really do favors for someone that didnât treat him nicely. When he said that he simply treated others the way they deserved it was true, if someone treat him nicely, he would treat them the same way, if they donât, he wonât either.
âIt was just a question, one little questionâ
Fair enough, he was in the hospital, could be in a bad mood, thing is that the other times, he wasnât, and treat him the exact same way. He wasnât sure why he treated him like that, after all, the wolf never done anything against him, he also didnât hurt innocent people. He would understand if that was the case, but it wasnât, and the blonde didnât really care enough to ask why, if he wanted to treat him that way, then so be it, but Shawn definitely wouldnât treat him nicely either.
People often mistook his niceness with being  a pushover, when he was far from it.
He didnât hate the other,he wasnât a bad guy, but as long as he kept treating him the way he did, he would do the same.
âNo, I just saw you when I was heading to the front door to get out and ended up overhearing you, but donât worry, I wonât stay longâ
jesus.
yeah it was just a question. Â a personal and invasive question - which, if it had have been answered, would probably result in another lecture style monologue about whatever bug had gotten up the guys ass this time. Â all he seemed to do was wander around - gawp at whatever jace was doing at the time, whine or nag at him about it - and be utterly useless otherwise.
so, he overheard him and decided to shuffle over just to be a dick about it? real nice - he wonders if heâs this jolly to the kumbaya kids too.  why not take a shot at the guy in the hospital bed?  it was probably easier than actually getting off his ass and doing something about the shitstorm in this town.  he hopes that - for what itâs worth - it gives him the warm fuzzies.  make him feel like the big man to antagonise the sick or injured. Â
âwhatever rocks your socks, blondie.â
so the hunter turns over, in as much as the wires will let him, attempts to make himself comfortable among the drips and monitors ( not easy with a couple of bullet holes ) - and closes his eyes.  he doesnât have to be âniceâ to people who do nothing but bitch at him for actually trying to do the right thing.  heâs too damn tired and too damn sore.  and yeah, heâs ended up in a bad state, but it was better than one more body on the slab in the damn morgue - those were the risks.  this was the price.  save a life - then have someone be an ass to you over a cup of coffee - there was a decent slice of irony.
âsure - donât let the door hit you in the ass on the way out.â
or do. Â whatever.
#I love it when deanâs face carries on entire conversations with itself
thexdarkxwithin:
âIâd seriously contemplate it, yeah.â The corners of her mouth turn up to form a familiar grin that he is no doubt used to by now. In truth, if there was alcohol in itâand putting aside it wouldnât really be sensible with the condition he is inâshe would share the damn coffee with him. âWe will never know though, seeing how itâs just plain old coffeeâif it can be called that because those machines are freakinâ crap.â Amber looks over at him and shrugs. âAnything hot and wet is probably good for you though at the moment while youâre stuck in that bed though, huh?â She realises the words spoken and smirks. âI was actually referring to the drink and nothing else.â
Sheâs actually quite glad that she has taken a seat on the bed beside him, because she feels a little light-headed. Itâs nothing too serious, but when stress, worry and concern are the only things which course through your entire bodyâthe relief that comes when it dissipates, it can do something physical, almost draining.
âIâm just tiredâŚonce I get some food down me and some sleep, my healing will kick in better.â She looks at him and gives a lazy lop-sided smile. Having her head stomped on really doesnât help matters and it was only days earlier that she had her head slammed into a wall by an asshole vampire.
She closes her eyes momentarily as he touches her bruised face. Itâs tender as hell, but at the same time it does offer some comfort as well, so she gives him a soft look as she opens her eyes.
âI know I wouldâve healed faster without using my mojo on you as you call itâŚbut we are both here, right?âand Iâd sooner have us both around than just meâso I donât freakinâ regret it one bit.â Besides, his injuries have to heal too and with being human, theyâll take longer than hers.
It does raise a smile though when he speaks about his car. She can totally appreciate the fact he thinks so much about it. Itâs definitely been a pleasure to drive, even through the dire circumstances which cropped up to have her behind the steering wheel.
âSix months?..shitâŚthatâs a long while.â
Yet she can still understand him doing so. Amber is pretty sure she would spend most of her time in a car if she legally owned one. To her it would beat paying for a motel room to sleep as well and certainly better than the woods. Now the young wolf does like wandering the woods at night sometimes, but sleeping there like she does a few times, itâs not ideal.
She catches on to his reference of the car and her nickname too and thereâs an urge to nudge him playfully, but luckily she stops herself at the last second as she remembers he might be a little âdelicateâ right now.
âHell yesâŚshe is far better than most of the motels I get to stay inâfunnily enough itâs quieter as well because the rooms next door sometimes, I swear they are having fuckinâ gangbangs or something.â Amber knows with the type of motels she pays for, itâs more likely to be hookers using the rooms for âbusinessâ.
Looking down at her wrist, she sees the candy watch that some kid gave her whilst she was trying to find out the room Jace was in. She wasnât going to take it, but the boy was clearly eyeing the small pin badge on her jacketâso they did an exchange.
âso she bites it between her teeth and pulls of a couple of candy ringsâlinksâwhatever the hell they are.
Chomping on them, she notices his expression change and raises a brow at him.
âI didnât think you would blame me, JaceâŚI know you aint the kindâŚand I know you know I triedâŚjust meant it doesnât mean I didnât fuck up.â
Letting out a sigh and tilting her head slightly as she looks at him, Amber nods.
âYouâre right thoughâŚas long as things turn out fineâŚthen we both did okayâŚ..though I gotta askâŚdidnât they question where Iâd sewn you up?â
She isnât the type to continue with showing her worry and explaining the extent of how scared she wasâbut Amber still remembers all the blood and realises what a close shave it was with the whole shifting into her wolf form too. That is one thing which she really darenât think aboutânot the consequences if they would have been too late anyway.
â Yes we are still hereâŚand Iâm gladâŚreal freakinâ gladâŚâ Her expression softens as she smiles. âYou did promiseâŚthough I gotta sayâthatâs one I wouldâve forgiven you for if you werenât able to keep itâŚyet I wasnât gonna tell you that at the time.â Tapping her finger on the top of his hand, one place she thinks she can find thatâs not too sensitive and aching, she continues. âOne hell of a promise though, huhâŚ.â
Sheâs perked up a lot more since being in his company and is just about to talk when he starts moving position.
âWoah heyâŚbe carefulâŚâ
Her brow furrows and she sighs, realising a split second before he speaks, what he is going to say, but she waits anyway until he has finished some of it.
âFine, okayâŚjust donât go fuckinâ moving like that..you might bust a stitch or some shit.â
Itâs not like she is going to argue with him, though Amber knows herself well enough to know she will probably still leave and go there tonight to clear up the mess. He doesnât have to worry about that right now though.
Then he follows it with something else that kind of makes it difficult not to agree and so she inhales and takes a deep breath.
âAlrightâŚI wonât go alone..I promiseâŚseeâŚmy turn to promise you nowâŚ.but Tris?âŚaint seen him for a bit and I aint even sure he damn well likes meâŚgonna be awkward going there as well if he doesnât know what I amâŚâ She keeps her gaze on Jace and cocks a brow. âDoes he know what I am?â
considering heâs the one in the hospital with a few holes punched through him... jace somehow feels as though heâs the one doing better right now. Â sure heâs cold and sore and itâs going to take a while to recover. Â but at least heâs in a bed and... there might be food at some point... even if amber was the one whoâd had to bring him coffee... but amber? Â heâs not so sure sheâs doing so well. Â the huts just keep on coming... and thereâs only so many you can take before the chips around the edges turn into deeper cracks.
heâs a little slow off the mark with the joke and it does take him a fraction longer to catch on to what sheâs saying. Â usually heâd be the one making the wise cracks, the innuendo... but when his brain does finally catch up, he gives a soft snort.
âyânever know - i play my cards right... someone might still turn up in a nurses outfit... Â not any actual nurses though, they seem pretty thin on the ground. Â ainât seen one since...â
since he came round to a barrage of questions and things being shone in his eyes, things being poked and stabbed with damn needles... ugh.
â...well for a while. Â besides, i think theyâre a bit too mean to be swayed by my stunning good looks and obvious charms.â
now heâs the one whoâs teasing. Â but he is -- worried. Â still. Â
âjust make sure you do. Â if you need something for eats - check the trunk. Â thereâs an emergency stash tucked inside the .44 guncase. Â and - donât worry, it wasnât gotten by any legitimate means - pool hustling - remember?â
she might feel a little better about accepting the help if she knew that the cash was earned through a drunken game... in fact, a few drunken games... there was about a grand - enough to see someone through the sharp end of a dry spell.  thereâs a small âhmâ as she talks about not regretting using her mojo.  he doesnât regret her not regretting it either - but he hopes that the delay to her own healing, that the hit sheâs taken on his behalf - isnât too bad.
âsix months in the company of a beautiful lady? Â werenât no hardship. Â no roaches. Â no slightly concerning stains on the bedsheets. Â no watermarks on the ceiling. Â no -- gangbangs from adjacent rooms... bliss.â
he watches as she chews on... something.  not exactly familiar with candy bracelets.  it doesnât look wholly nutritious.  and in so far as jace tends to fill his own body with vast amounts of crap, even the âcrapâ tends to have at least more than pure sugar...Â
âand when i say âeatsâ i mean... actual food - pizza.  burger.  rack of ribs in barbecue sauce.  not... what the hell is that anyway?â
oh, hell yeah, theyâd asked him questions. Â a lot of questions. Â bonus of being severely wounded was that - once heâd vaguely got a hold on his brain, that he could lie through his teeth, and actually had sounded reasonably convincing.
âyep. Â told em i mustâve tried to do it myself before they got there but i couldnât really remember. Â bonus of blood loss, transient global amnesia â itâs totally a thing. Â a thing i donât have, by the way - but itâs down on the chart.â
one finger points to the little clipboard dangling at the end of the bed. Â various scribbles. Â doseage of drugs. Â general monitoring... blah blah -- theyâd asked about the bullet holes. Â heâd put it down to -- home invasion gone wrong. Â but it also explained the mess - signs of blood smeared all over the kitchen, up to the front door. Â a struggle of victim under -- terrible circumstances. Â as for the perpetrators? Â he has no idea. Â they must have made a run for it after they shot him... panicked and fled... or - something like that. Â and for once, jace has some legitimacy behind the claim. Â heâs living there with his brother while they make repairs to the old place - the mass of tools and paint and plaster around the house was testament enough - that, and he has a signed tenancy... so...Â
he does go slightly crosseyed though, following her finger as it taps on his forehead. Â
âdonât make my promises lightly, sparky.â
yes, he could lie through his teeth when the occasion called for it, but when it came down to something meaningful, something real... something -- important... Â lies are the furthest thing from his tongue. Â heâs not entirely sure he believes in the concept of honour, or chivalry or... any of those old fashioned traits. Â but he does believe in honesty - especially with those he cares about.
âiâm fine... iâm fine...â
he does arch a brow though - jace hadnât really... talked... to tristan much since theyâd gotten to this town. Â his brother had been pretty much awol... and after what had happened between them, jace doesnât exactly blame him for needing a bit of breathing space. Â
âiâm not entirely sure he likes me either.â
at least thatâs honest. Â but whatever bad feelings tristan might be harboring for jace, he knows his brother well enough ( he thinks ) to know that he wouldnât turn his back on someone who needed help...
âthey were after you in the first place, sparky. Â and iâd rather you didnât go strolling right back in their front door -- if -- there are any left alive. Â truth is, i donât know... was kinda in a hurry to get out of there. Â but -- no -- i ainât told him. Â ainât really my secret to tell, yâknow?â
âeven if you canât find him -- find... someone. Â take blue -- Â if you can persuade him. Â or even the ice queen witch bitch. Â just... come see me. Â so i know youâre...â
okay. Â safe. Â alive. Â -- all of the above. Â
â...just come see me after? Â now -- what do you say to tryinâ to find somethinâ on this shitty ass tv... and just, lettinâ the world take care of itself for the next hour or so, huh?â
ceciditvenator:
âthe âwarâ is already here.  has been for a hell of a long time â longer than me.  longer than you.  you donât have to start it - hell, you donât even have to finish it â but you gotta make the decision for yourself⌠what are you fighting â for?â
thatâs something he believes.  completely.  that war was something that began millennia ago.  but choosing to fight - staying in the battle⌠not for power or greed or glory orâŚ. anything like that.  but for goodness, and understanding, and protection and⌠peace.  that - was definitely something worth fighting for.
he does give a soft huff of a laugh, wandering to the other side of the room to put down the bits and pieces, dumping the bloodied items in the trash⌠ he can clean the rest up later. Â
âhey, slugger - take credit where you can. Â donât matter what it is - if it works out in your favour - itâs a bonus. Â and note for the future - cut out an arrow, donât yank it out. Â if you have to - snap it off a couple of inches above the wound so it doesnât get snagged on anythinâ.â
he does flip the arrow though, holding the point in his hand, that silver tip safely away in his palm, offering the âsafeâ end to the young woman.  followed by a slight quip and a flash of a grin.
âbetter be careful though. Â with all this silver and arsenal youâre buildinâ up - people might mistake you for a hunter.â
he does purse his lips though â whatâs out there in the woods.  and in this case - what was âstillâ out there in the woods.  tied securely to a tree.
âspeakinâ of which â i still gotta go have a chat with our buddy out there.  make sure he gets the message and perhaps takes up a⌠different hobby.â
jace knows it isnât going to be quite that easy, and heâs not exactly looking forward to it. Â but it had to be done - talking a hunter round was a little like repeatedly hitting yourself over the head with a brick. Â he knows. Â he is one.
âyouâre welcome to whatâs left in that bottle, and whateverâs in the fridge - thereâs a spare room upstairs - second door on the left.  bathroom first on the right - or you can just take the couch.  take your time, get some rest - heal up.  and â if something that looks like the abominable snowman with long dark floppy hair wanders in â thatâll be my brother - please try not to do the whole â grrrr â thing at him, yeah?  i mean - tris is pretty chill,  but heâs still a hunter⌠soâŚâ
he pauses at the thanks. Â itâs not something he hears that often. Â and it actually takes him by surprise.
âitâs⌠uh⌠i mean⌠youâre welcome.  now get some rest.â
âThatâs not a very hard question. I know what I want to fight for. For myself, the people I care about. To make sure that the asshole who ruined my leg -and Iâm not talking about the hunter, even when I donât wish him all the best- doesnât do it with anyone else again. And heâs targeting the pack here, so I guess I donât have much of a choice in the matter.â
She didnât want the Arcadia pack gone. First she didnât want it because she didnât want Kristos to get what he wanted, but now she was getting to know them⌠she really liked them. Not just because they were old friends of her pack, but because they were just nice people. Welcoming. They were giving her a home.
âOh, I know. And Iâm not above taking credit if I actually deserve them. I did knock him out, so⌠Iâll gladly take credits for that. And letâs just hope I never need to use your advice. This is not really an experience I like to repeat.â
She took the arrow from him. Not to use it, just to keep it as a reminder of what some people were capable of. To remember why she had to train a few times a week to get better, if the constant ache in her leg wasnât motivation enough. Apparently Kristos wasnât the only one she had to be able to defend herself from. This guy was just as much a danger as the alpha was. She chuckled.
âIâm first and foremost a werewolf, Jace. So no, Iâll never be a hunter because thatâs just not me. I just⌠I donât want to be defenseless again. Iâve been there once, not doing it again. And with that busted leg, I need to get other advantages.â
She winked, knowing he meant it as a joke and she could take it as one. She just wanted to make clear to the man she was looking up to why she made the choices she was making right now. Somehow it was important that he understood.
âGood luck. I hope you manage. I donât feel like meeting him again anytime soon, soâŚâ
She laughed at his description of his brother, even when she was really grateful for the hospitality he was offering as something that wasnât a big deal. She was still a wolf though, while he was a hunter. He was going to talk to someone like him to defend someone like her, and it meant a lot to her.
âIâll be have, ok? I only did the whole grr thing because you were cutting me open. You had a good reason for it, so Iâm not blaming you, but itâs not really my default way of greeting someone. Most definitely not in someone elseâs house. Iâll behave, donât worry.â
She leaned back on the couch, taking another swig from the bottle she was holding again. Sheâs probably want something to eat, but sheâd wait until she had at least some time to heal up.
âI will. Iâll be fine now.â
--fin--
moonchildshawn:
âIt seems like you really can drink a cup of coffeeâ
He remembered seeing a coffee machine close by to the otherâs room, he had a good night of sleep, so he didnât drink, but maybe he could get a cup for the other. He just drank coffee when he didnât have a good night of sleep, to wake him up, but when he was fully awake, he didnât see a reason to drink it, he wasnât the biggest fan of coffee.
âI stopped by here to sing for the little kids, I do that sometimes, what happened to you?â
âyeah, and it seems iâll lay here forever wondering what that might be like...â
brow arches. Â they could debate over what jace was and - or wasnât allowed to have. Â either way, the hunter is too damn tired to ask again. Â and too damn sore to argue. Â so he just tips his head back into the pillow, tries to rearrange himself into a comfortable position - which is pretty much impossible given all the damn wires.
âyou grill the kids about their illness and injuries too? -- i had... an accident.â
well. Â if you could count being shot by a gang of rogue hunters while trying to rescue a werewolf... accidental. Â probably not. Â but whatever. Â he knows itâs a waste of breath trying to explain anything. Â heâd probably get another lecture about how it was unwise and socially and morally unacceptable or something. Â but hey, at least heâd proved his own point. Â if he hadnât done anything - just sat around like social justice seemed to want to, then amber might be...Â
...well. Â heâd done something. Â and she was safe. Â
whatever - this guy couldnât get any more vanilla if he tried.  sit back while people were dying - but sing to kids - right.  jace is half tempted to ask if he sings âkumbayaâ.
âso you gonna sing to me?â
might actually relieve the boredom - even if he might die of thirst ( so sometimes heâs a drama queen, okay? ), and heâs pretty damn fed up of just listening to the machine beeping.
zacharyhawtorn:
âWell, if you get fluids and donât need to pee, there must be something to say about that whole dehydration thing.â
He winked, trying to make a joke to lift the tension that was always there in a hospital room a bit. It normally didnât bother him, he was used to it and he was there as a professional, but as a random visitor, it was a bit different.
âBut yeah, I never got anyone into the ER who got dehydrated by caffeine. Itâs no problem. And I happen to know they do coffee rounds every now and then. Just donât blame me for the quality of the coffee. Itâs not good. Sorry.â
There was a reason some of the doctors had installed their own coffee machine in the employee room. There was a day that you had had enough coffee from the machine to be able to endure it any longer.
âYou donât have to convince me of the use of caffeine, man. Iâve lived through entire days on that stuff, so Iâm a convert already.â
Mainly because it just helped him to appear more human than he truly was, but he couldnât help but depend slightly on the effect of caffeine to stay awake if he pulled another long shift because he didnât feel like going home and he was the best option to stay another night. After all⌠he could do with less sleep that most of his colleagues.
That was something he hadnât really missed since he had left though⌠the rest of it? He was sick of standing at the side doing nothing, which is why he was carefully trying to see if he might be ready to get back.
âYeah, yeah, I know the whole supernatural problems. Itâs a bit less urgent here, trust me. There are doctors who know -although most of them were on a leave because they were⌠instable-, and trust me, the ones who donât know⌠they still live in Arcadia. Theyâve seen some weird wounds in their career. But really⌠Iâve seen a lot of weird stuff from people trying to play doctor at home.â
Fine, that were usually the more alternative types who were trying to replace stitches by herbs and things like that. It never worked well. At least not for the people that ended up in the ER anyway.
âGood. Iâd hate to defend someone who did it to you. You know, with the whole staying neutral thing you hate so much.â
It was mostly the problem that there were a few people he just couldnât drop. He didnât have any problems with speaking out against Nicolas, that Jacob guy or Pandora, but if it would be Erik⌠he would still have a problem.
âclass three haemorrhage. Â cross matched six unit transfusion. Â large-bore IV cannulae for rapid fluid replacement - 12 hour intravenous antibiotic prophylaxis. Â systolic stabilised at 110. Â not exactly something i can mock up with a home medi-kit. -- Â donât think that just because i ainât got a fancy schmancy medical degree that iâm some kind of base amateur, blue.â
heâs - educated enough - after all, when you trained your whole life as a killer, it was part and parcel to know where to land those fatal blows.  the most devastating wounds.  a quick kill was a clean kill.  and more chance of a human - a hunter - walking away from it.  sometimes - things didnât quite go as planned.  and heâd probably patched up more people, himself and his brother included - than half the doctors in the damn ER.  you kinda classed as a âfirst responderâ when you were the one pulling someoneâs ass out of the fire.  and a lot of the time, those people had been hurt - some of them pretty badly.  so... patch them up enough that theyâd survive before getting them to a place where theyâd be safe and get âproperâ medical attention.
âbut iâd say from all that - iâm pretty well hydrated.â
the slightest raise of brow. Â heâs not trying to impress. Â but heâs also not someone who doesnât have a goddamn clue. Â he doesnât do -- weird stuff. Â knows well enough how to stop severe bleeding. Â how to mock up a splint. Â how to cover a wound. Â how to stitch. Â how to cauterise. Â how to do... well, a hell of a lot for traumatic injuries. Â doesnât really help him when he gets a cold. Â but itâs saved a few lives over the years. Â including his own.
â--still... doesnât do a hell of a lot for dry mouth when itâs direct to vein. Â hence... coffee. Â rancid or otherwise. Â as long as itâs hot and wet... itâd do.â
which might just warm him up a little. Â his body is still fighting to heal, to handle the shock, which means that heâs been feeling pretty damn cold beneath that thin scratchy sheet.
âbesides, itâs not like i ainât been shot before.â Â
just a couple more scars to add to the menagerie.  and a significant few of those had been acquired since heâd arrived in this town.  plus, he figures thatâs enough of a âhintâ for blue to rule out all of his ânearest and dearestâ.  those who got to reside in his blue bubble probably werenât so inclined to use guns.  and he supposes that - yeah - the vampireâs probably already drawn a few conclusions and... doesnât really care in so far as jace is the one taking the risks.  no matter who itâs for.  or why.
âso - nah. Â nothinâ for you to worry about.â
tongue swipes over lips in a fruitless effort to try to hydrate. Â while heâs sure his body is coping just fine now, that doesnât make things any more comfortable. Â so his voice is just as starched as those scratchy sheets. Â
âwhy are you here anyway? Â because i gotta tell ya - if you have a... shaky moment, i donât think iâm in any fit state for another drinking session out in the woods about now.â