cerise noire

a home for my words, a museum in text

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A New Environment

I am your stronghold I hold strong

I wouldn't dream of letting you go Let me carry you to the ends of the Earth

Hop on my back, use your muscle's memory Guide your grip, your weight familiar as home

Hold fast if it is the last thing I do, I will get you out of here

Hold my hand let your breath roll off my back You are my partner in crime My best friend My arch nemesis I could never hate someone more than I love you

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Your Target

Aim arrow at my heart and pull the trigger Sweet release with a swiftness Let me explode

I will love you Shaking, longing, begging for more

I need to cover you in my love I refuse to spare a square inch of flesh I know you must know me inside and out

So shoot let me writhe

I can see it in your eyes You are been begging for my heart to have and to hold dead or alive

I know you want me I know you won't miss

Take my love with speed and passion You are the only one that can

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Dream Girls

Sometimes really good friends are better than lovers

Celestial girls who reach down my throat and into my lungs Breathing life back into me patiently, methodically

Angel girls who summon supernatural forces to bid revenge Armoured in friendship bracelets and whispered promises Stitching my wounds with rainbow loom

They do not ask for my heart or my hand They already hold it in their palms

They do not demand my love They have always known it Woven into their consciousness And sealed with a pinky promise

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Sound and Light

Let me watch artists on stage Like ants who live to create Improvising chords through their third eye

I want to lap up every ounce of emotion emitted

I yearn to be bathed in sound and light Drown me in strobe lights and 808s Cover me in green and pink and white and black

I crave the feeling of drums in my chest A throbbing baseline down my spine

Lightning and thunder from the main stage Flooding through the cracks of the front doors All of their particles and waves Otherworldly atoms emitted from instruments

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Growing Up and Out

My mother My miracle mother My beautiful kind smart mother

Who held me in her womb, her arms, her heart Taught me to say please and thank you And I love you and I hate you

Now I go walking alone, driving alone With my thoughts and hers

I work so hard to leave her Day in and day out I pray I don't burden my miracle mother

But I know that even after all of these years, No one will ever soothe me in the same way

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City of Love

Shall I recite to you the ways I love you Count you on my fingers and toes Shout so the sun can hear my voice

I might play it in a song Croon for you in do re mi Hear the harmonies ring in the rhythm of I love you

Shakespeare could not dream of a love this grand Hand in hand through space and time Before during and after life

You will see it in swans and pebbles washed up Taste it in the labour of my meals Feel it in water splashes from paddleboat propellers

Oh how I long to hold you and touch you and kiss you and feel you and kiss you and breath you and kiss you and kiss you and kiss you and kiss you and kiss you

Like your immortal cat, I shall live 1000 lives for you Keep up and I will show you all the ways I love you

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I demand to be loved in multitudes

To feel your skin pressed against mine, Your body mimicking my every move. Slip like earth between your fingers, Sticking behind your ears and under your nails, Granting you to feel reborn, soiled, buried in my love.

You will tell armies about my mind, body, and soul, Start wars with your words, Create empires and dynasties in my name. Shout me from your rooftops and mountains; Let my voice rattle your bones And resonate into the stratosphere, Screaming my love until your lungs drain of oxygen.

Every moment with me will feel like an eternity. Lifetimes will pass between seconds spent in my arms, Pressed into my chest. I flow through your veins like water, Cleansing, purifying you from within. Let me be your life force, your first breath, your last, The tide that pulls you back to me for seconds, thirds, fourths.

I will consume you in reckless wildfires, Keep you warm through the coldest nights. Shine with the glow of my devotion Illuminate the parts of me I have yet to love. So you may rise from the ashes To the challenge of my love again, and again, and again.

I will give you the stars as fragments of my soul, Plucked from the cosmos and placed in your hands. I will wrap them in the silence of space, Tie them with the ribbons of time— And remind you that even in the infinite, You are my constant.

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What is love?

Is it the fallen petals in I love you not

Or those that hold to the flower

The wind that blows those blooms along

Down mildew grass and dampened streets

A child’s whisper

Or my mothers cry

“She loves me”

In a warble from behind a slammed bedroom door

What is love?

It swells and it cramps and it rips you to sheds

Builds empires, destroys nations

Love is magnificent, and somehow nothing at all

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and through bright blue days and lukewarm nights

their love peddled on

in the metal basket attached to her bicycle and the back seat of moms mini van

to the thump of their hearts pressed against their chests as they wheezed in unison 

through farmers markets and buzzing parks

they flew

their love was built on aluminum alloy

and friendship bracelets

and sand that stuck behind her ears

and pools of sweat who puddled up between the grooves of his toes

and firecracker feuds that burst into fights

and she would always win

so he thought, maybe summer wasn’t for him

maybe he’d like to be sat on the couch cuddled up by a fire

or counting snow flakes on someone elses nose

or picking petals of she loves me not

or brushing the grains of sand from behind her ears

and hiking up mountain sides in the scorching sun letting sweat puddle between his toes

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He loves me like stars and asphalt,

Like we are everything and nothing

He loves me in home cooked meals and dinners abroad

feeds me food and watches me grow

whispers the moon looks its best when it’s full

He loves me out loud

Says I’m his star

His sun

His light

He basks in me alone

He loves me in meters high snow drives

And grocery trips

And walking for so long we forget where we started

And always letting me get my way

He loves me in In kisses and murmurs and poems of

“You are my favourite…”

Favourite voice,

Favourite touch,

Favouite person

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I want to see you again, taste you again, hold you again

To walk up to the platform and pull you off the subway

Sweep you off of your feet and into my arms

I want to carry you to the museum

Show them what they are missing

Move a statue off of its pedestal and let you preach atop it instead

Let the world admire your beauty

Your spirit

Your soul

I cannot fathom what a curator would care for any art other than yourself

You breath in treasures 

And speak in masterpieces

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She is my swan song

In her ebbs and flows

Her melodies 

Her verses

Her chorus runs through my veins

And fills my heart until it stops

A siren song that calls me to her waters

Let me drown here

Fill my lungs with her symphony until it can bare no more

I want to choke on her soul

Make it leak from my eyes

Let the tears come in floods and tsunamis

For if I cannot have her, what is the point

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My Beloved Sun and Stars,

My dearest daystar. My lovely, handsome helios. My caring, kind sunshine. I love you. I love you. I love you. 

I love you on warm summer days, 

I look for you in ripples of water and hear you in babbling brooks

Your laughter sings with the song of the cicadas.

I love you on brisk spring mornings,

I smell you in lavender fields and morning dew

Always picking flowers in I love you

Never I love you not

I love you on crisp winter nights 

I adorn myself in gold and feel your warmth

Your embrace a sanctuary from the biting cold.

I love you on warm autumn evenings,

I listen for your whispers 

sweet secrets through the soft rustling autumn oak

I love you on days I feel alone, 

I plead to the sun to hear your voice

A starlight song from the sky