Idk

18 and living life or at least trying to

[boreed2deeath]

[anglebeebs]

6/2/26

Genuinelyy hatee it when I hang out with friends and I act likee i can just eat WHATEVER I want. I literallyy had pizzaa, a cookiee AND somee icee cream. God whyy the hell did I do that?? I knew for a fact I’d hatee it todayy? Ugh it’s whatever though im back on track now… 😞

[ftttttash]

AHHHHHHHH

[sprnikls]

[darkerndarker]

Me when I think about how some girls lose their appetite when they’re depressed, but when I’m depressed I just eat more.

[loveridden1999]

my two mood these days

[chaoticallyenergy-1]

WIED- June 08, 2026

I forgot to post this yesterday but oh well

Breakfast- 2 hash browns ($240)

Lunch- 2 hash browns ($240)

Dinner- pineapple $118

Total $615

[anieb0ne]

"u don't look 4n0r3ksik"

I KNOW, IM STILL WORKING ON THAT.

[sirius-walker]

I really really need money

[dietcoke22]

I want my grade up and the scale down

[dollierexic]

how it feels to binge knowing all i need to do is shut my mouth and stop eating

[report-me-again-i-dare-you]

I don't gamble but I did take an edible while actively restricting if that counts

[leavemetfalone5]

,,What did you eat today?” Get out of my face before i jump you.

[leavemetfalone5]

,,if u dont start taking care of yourself you’ll destroy your body”

from the bottom of my heart,

I COULD NOT care less bro💔💔💔💔💔💔

[chaoticallyenergy-1]

Gotta love the feeling you get right before you spiral. Like I know I’m about one bad day away from losing it. Or maybe I’m already losing it and am actively spiralling

I’m ranting under the cut btw. Feel free to not read and please be mindful of the tags and don’t read if it’ll trigger you

I’m fucking dizzy all the fucking time and I’m fat and my teeth fucking hurt from the pųrġing and every day I look in the mirror and just realize how ugly I am.

Today I realized that a year ago I was considering kms and I had a plan and everything and I honestly should’ve just freaking done it and saved myself the trouble. A year later and I’m covered in scars I’ll always regret and I have a fucking 3d that I’m in treatment for when I know damn well I have no plans of recovering outside of getting people off my back. My stupid 3d is ruining my voice and I’m scared I’ll lose my ability to sing at the skill level I’m currently at after I’ve worked hard for the past 3 years to get to this point of vocal ability.

My grades are not bad but I still feel like a disappointment and every time I feel like a disappointment I end whipping out a blade to make myself feel better even though it doesn’t fix a damn thing.

I feel broken and useless and disappointed with myself. I hate the person I am and I genuinely believe that I am a horrible person who doesn’t deserve the things I have and I don’t deserve kindness or compassion. I’m so tired of feeling and I miss the months of being numb. I miss when all I felt was being cold, the stinging of a blade and the heat of a lighter. I miss the comfort I found in ⭐️rving and the discipline I had to actually workout everyday. I miss when I didn’t stick my fingers down my throat just to make myself feel better about being fat. I miss when I was still actively losing and not stuck in a plateau because I’m too undisciplined to truly lock in. I miss when I could drop 3kg in a week and a half

I’m avoiding my doctor cause I don’t want him to see that I’m still fat and still pųrġing and I don’t want to go for more bloodwork or for another ecg. I don’t want to see how bad my blood pressure is either. I also am tired of lying to my therapist and I’m honestly just counting down the days until I go to uni across the country just so I can be as mentally ill as I want.

[freekslerp]

can i even call myself disordered if my stomach sticks out instead of sinking in?

[j3nn1f3rs-b0dy]

The fact that anything talking about self harm (3d, $h, su1C1d34l th0ughts) isn't allowed on tumblr but the p0rn blogs are perfectly fine is actually my 13th reason.

(Says so in the emails we get when we get trmd)