I feel compelled to share with you all the saga of the duck and how my afternoon went
• it appeared out of nowhere in the backyard. I'm in the city and nowhere near ponds/lakes or anywhere this creature would've been comfortable
• it rudely attacked me when I tried to check if it was hurt
• it rudely attacked me again when I tried to set out some water for it in a red bowl, it felt threatened by the color red.
• was rejected by the environmental police.
• was rejected by the fire department.
• called my grandma (the one who's chilled water bottle of holy water was consumed in 1.3 seconds by my brother, iykyk)
• granda goes on a religious rant about how this black duck is the sign that the apocalypse is imminent, the only help she provides are prayer instructions.
• I call my uncle who lives nearby for help, he says "I know exactly what to do" and then shows up with material to turn the poor creature into a meal. I shoo him away and defend the ducks right to be alive.
• parents are no help, brother suggests selling it and splitting the costs (i hear brother get attacked by the duck while I'm on the phone with the fire department, presumably after he attempted to capture it for monetary gain)
• I give up and start accepting that I own a duck now
• I set out some oats in water for it, it quacks at me rudely when I offer them.
• it attempts to fly into the sun but gets caught on the net that covers the backyard. It falls (was not hurt, I checked)
• I go inside to do some work.
• the duck has disappeared.
• it's not on the property, it's not outside on the street. It likely flew away OR was sucked up by an interdimensional portal.
