well you see... @chocobo-strife - Tumblr Blog

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kedreeva

I offered to come check on my friend's animals while she's away for the long weekend

She thinks I'm joking

But I'm ready

eunyisadoran

Wait. Are there 200, but to be numbered 1-250? Did I read those tags right? 😲

kedreeva

Yes there are actually 202 of them, the company sent 2 extra in the package, and I will be numbering them on the bottom with sharpie marker 1-250. This will ensure even if she manages to find all 202, she will never truly stop feeling like there might be a tiny duck somewhere unknown in the house. Lurking. Waiting to appear at the strangest time.

talesfromtreatment

#sometimes you must be gently evil to your friends#so they know you love them enough

very very important

ifririt

hey op i don't think those are frogs like you said

armayes

they're right those arent frogs op.

kedreeva

I meant to prank my friend by hiding hundreds of small ducks after saying I would hide small frogs, but it turns out due to some quirk of only 3 people on the entire Internet knowing what a prank is, it seems I have pranked hundreds of other people by saying I would put 100 small frogs in my friends house, when in fact the prank was that it was 202 small ducks.

kedreeva

an update. it has been over 4 months and they are still finding ducks

kedreeva

1 year and 7 months later:

kedreeva

#imagine the dread she felt when she found the first duck and realized op wasn't joking (via @robyn-goodfellowe)

The key to a good prank, imo, is that the person you're pranking should not feel bad. They should feel delight. My friend has 2 kids. She walked in the door from her vacation, and instead of having two cranky children to deal with as soon as she got home on top of everything else, she got two children excited to run around finding small ducks. My friend knows me well enough to know that when I say weird things there's always a chance I'm not joking, and she would have said no (and been respected) if she didn't want this. The prank was never that I was hiding the toys, just which toys they were, and how many would be hidden.

goats-ablaze

woke up today and realized that tumblr entirely killed fuck ya life bing bong so here ya go again

thereisselfpreservation

vigilantsycamore

Tumblr pillow fight

Reblog to hit the person you reblogged this from with a pillow

thesevenumbrellas

Not all venom fans are monster fuckers 😞 some of us are just aroace disasters who like the idea of a platonic soulmate who likes to murder annoying people for you, is that so bad?

thesevenumbrellas

Guys I’m part of the club 🥺

ursavorpalis

monsterqueerplatonic

thesevenumbrellas

extreme-ultimate-hornknee

Aces are welcomed and are valued members in the monsterfucker community.

this-is-asexual-joy

This is asexual joy!

victor-blog55

I think my favorite moment in all of solo leveling is where when Jinwoo is fighting Igris for the first time, and realizes his dagger isn't doing anything so he puts it away and Igris is just like "Oh we doing straight hands?" Drops his buster sword and cape and just smacks Jinwoo into a wall.

voidsentprinces

So we got gunsword job and gunshield job now we need gunwand job.

kaijufluffs

She's being so big and brave.

kaijufluffs

The long awaited sequel.

tyaz

lolt64

KILLING STANCE: TEN SOUL RENDING CLAWS

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

alas the melancholy, it strikes at my heart! prithee, humble tumblr toiler, share with me your most superior cephalopod fact

27-bones

Male octopus get eaten a lot while reproducing so they usually develop a survival strategy. My favorites are they're usually in a position where they can get out fast or they remove their reproductive arm and give it to the females which they can still use and honestly is more beneficial as they can use it when they find somewhere safe for eggs.

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

*detatches my penis mid-coitus for u to add to ur inventory*

lmtyl

The blanket octopus has some of the most extreme size differences between males and females, with females reaching 2 meters (6.6 ft) and males maxxing out around 2.4 cm (1 inch). Males and immature females have been found carrrying stinging man-o-war tentacles to use as defensive weapons.

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

don't talk to me (hulking goddess), my boyfriend (amoeba), OR our third (innocent bystander we kidnapped for use as a living weapon)

go-learn-esperanto

Hey. If people aren't aware, Microsoft admitted they know who you and where you are at all times and will give your info to the police.

They have a Global Device Identifier (GDID) Tracker that functions as a fingerprint for your PC that can surpass VPNs, proxy servers and countries. Although it can't survive a clean reinstall of Windows (it can survive updates), because Microsoft forces you to go to the internet and log in into a Microsoft account, they will be able to get to you.

Microsoft kept it secret and it was only found out when the FBI tracked a hacker thanks to the information Microsoft gave them.

You should be paying attention to this, and possibly consider moving away from Windows. If a government, especially the US government, doesn't like you for some reason, this could be seriously concerning.

This article specifically notes:

For journalism, activism, or domestic abuse situations, skip Windows and use Linux routed through Tor instead of a commercial VPN. A GDID doesn’t care which VPN you use, only that it’s still the same Windows installation.

GDID is the persistent Windows ID that helped FBI trace a Scattered Spider hacker despite VPNs. Here's how it works and how to limit it.

Other important quotes:

What has researchers uneasy is everything else the case reveals. Costin Raiu, a well-known malware researcher, asked on the Three Buddy Problem podcast how much of this exists on other platforms, and whether it is linked more permanently to hardware. Matthew Hickey, another security researcher, called Windows “surveillance software”.

Two things back that up:

There’s no consent screen. A GDID gets assigned when you sign into a Microsoft Account. Apple’s advertising identifier needs an App Tracking Transparency prompt and a visible reset; Android’s works the same way. GDID has neither, and a Windows reinstall only gets you a new number Microsoft can still get back to the same account.

Then there’s activation. Massgrave, the group behind Microsoft Activation Scripts, notes that Windows setup sends hardware info to Microsoft and gets identifiers back, the same tokens later used for Store access and licensing: “It’s impossible to prevent Windows from getting a GDID without breaking activation and UWP app[s].” Anyone who lost a license after swapping a motherboard has already met a smaller version of this.

Here's the complaint filed to the court, the primary source for the case mentioned in the article. You can find mentions of GDID on page 30 of the document or 34 of the PDF.

Thank you @just-call-me-zinnia for finding it!

saturniandragon

Tumblr people!! I've figured out a way to delete GDID from your computer!

Removing and Blocking Global Device Identifier (GDID) – A Guide for Better Privacy in Microsoft Windows 10/11 Written by saturniandragon@tum

I also made a PDF version!!

Please do me a favor, reblog for reach!! This went through several days of research and testing!! THANKS

ryanthedemiguy

You can get and use windows 11 without logging in with a microsoft account, as of five days ago. I am a local user on my computer. Don't ask me how to do it, because my computer repair guy did it when he reinstalled windows, but there are tutorials out there. Refuse to connect to internet until you're set up and can use the computer freely.

frenchtugboat

Refusing to connect to the internet doesn't help. You have to open a Command Prompt (Shift+F10) and typing start ms-cxh:localonly (and pressing enter) during installation when you get to the sign in/create stupid ms account screen

For comprehensive deets, tomshardware explains

Maintain only a local account on your Windows 11 PC.

Unless there's really really specific reasons to subject yourself to windows, please consider installing linux mint instead.

whereserpentswalk

Revlog to protect someone! ^_^

anarchomikeism

ancaporado

wageronvoluntaryism

Never forget what they took from us.

wageronvoluntaryism

For those asking how it compares today

cheese-sample-official

and also

bmxpotato

Mid-year 2026 update (this is without tax):

slightlyirritable

Remember this the next time someone argues that raising the minimum wage will raise prices

segamascott

otteroflore

alright everyone is being sassy but nobody has brought up the actual reason why scientists are interested in the titanic in the notes

Per wikipedia:

The Titanic was made of steel, presumably to resist corrosion (i mean. thats why boats are made of steel i assume) but even when iron/steel rusts people did not expect to find like. decomposition. bacteria are EATING the titanic.

and there's wood furniture from the titanic that isn't decaying. hell, there are wood ships at the bottom of the ocean that archaeologists study. so the expectation people have for the titanic is not that the steel would decompose at the bottom of the ocean. Even in 100 years, since there are much more ancient preserved wooden ships iirc.

(im not particularly knowledgeable about ships, i just had heard about the science going on around the titanic so i wanted to clarify that on this post for people)

shoresoftheshadowlands

sailor-arashi

The Titanic is an exceptionally weird whalefall basically.

claraschaos

Not a marine biologist but biologist enough to weigh in on this. The reason we have iron eating bacteria but not wood eating bacteria at the bottom of the ocean is simple. Hydrothermal vents release a cocktail of different mineral ores into the ocean. And bacteria and other organisms evolved alongside those so they evolved to digest these, like iron or other metal ores

Wood however does not exist at the bottom of the ocean since it basically never sinks down, even when logs are flushed out into the ocean they basically never end up at the ocean floor. So there's no bacteria that evolved to decompose lignin, which is already complex enough to decompose on the surface. And that's why wooden ships or the furniture on the Titanic stay intact for hundreds of years or longer.

lobo-cansado-de-ojos-rojos

Okay, but I remember reading a magazine stating that the titanic would basically be gone by now because of the rust eating the ship.

The sister ship HMHS Britannic is still perfectly preserved because of the way it sank, and partly in due to the coral that has grown around it keeping the structure in tact I believe was the reason.

theminingdwarf

Coral acting like a living fossil specifically for sunken ships is the coolest thing I've ever heard

kyraneko

So lemme get this straight, the Titanic is a whalefall, the Britannic is a biological mummy, and all the wood ships that sink into the deep ocean are preserved incorrupt because nothing can eat them.

Zombie, mummy, lich, respectively.

islamprotestan-blog

only 5 seconds

zanyflowerpizzatrash

i wasn't ready for that..lol

suffer-no-humiliation

Immediately recognized that look

miketalkstrash-deactivated20170

Let’s not forget to acknowledge Alexandre Dumas this Black History Month

The writer of two of the most well known stories worldwide, The Three Musketeers and The Count of Monte Cristo was a black man.

That’s excellence.

latinagabi

Let’s not forget that he was played on screen by a white man. And the fact that he was black is barely ever mentioned or the book he wrote inspired by his experiences.

princessnijireiki

Other things not to forget about Alexandre Dumas:

chose to take on his slave grandmother’s last name, Dumas, like his father did before him.

grew up too poor for formal education, so was largely self-taught, including becoming a prolific reader, multilingual, well-travelled, and a foodie, resulting in his writing both a combination encyclopedia/cookbook (which just— is fucking outrageous to me) AND the adaptation of The Nutcracker on which Tchaikovsky based his ballet

he also wrote a LOOOOT of nonfiction and fiction about history, politics, and revolution, bc he was pro-monarchy, but a radical cuss, and that got him in a lot of hot water at home and abroad.

even beyond that, he generally put up with a lot of racist bullshit in France, so he went and wrote a novel about colonialism and a BLATANTLY self-insert anti-slavery vigilante hero (which he then cribbed from to write the Count of Monte Cristo, the main character of which, Edmond Dantés, Dumas also based on himself).

(…a novel which also features a LOAD of PoC beyond the Count, and at LEAST one queer character, btw, bc EVERY MOVIE ADAPTATION OF ANYTHING BY DUMAS IS A LIE; seriously, at LEAST one of the four Musketeers is Black, y'all.)

famously, when some fuckshit or other wanted to come at Dumas with some anti-Black foolishness, Dumas replied, “My father was a mulatto, my grandfather was a Negro, and my great-grandfather a monkey. You see, Sir, my family starts where yours ends.”

for the bicentennial of his birthday, Pres. Jacques Cirac was like, “…sorry about the hella racism,” and had Dumas’s ashes reinterred at the Panthéon of Paris, bc if you’re gonna keep the corpses of the cream of the crop all together, Dumas’s more widely read and translated than literally everybody else.

and they are still finding stuff old dude wrote, seriously; like discovering “lost” works as recently as 2002, publishing stuff for the first time as recently as 2005.

ALSO IMPORTANT:

SWAG

sugaryumyum-deactivated20170907

I am absolutely ashamed to admit I had NO idea Dumas was black.

elodieunderglass

when this post first went around (a year ago apparently) I was like BUT WHAT ABOUT DADDY DUMAS THOUGH because basically

daddy general dumas was an immense fierce french warrior who was a 6 foot plus, stunningly gorgeous and charismatic Black gentleman

he invaded egypt

the native egyptians said “is this napoleon? this must be napoleon. we for one welcome our majestic new overlord”

then napoleon showed up

napoleon has all the presence of yesterday’s plain Tesco hummus

the native egyptians were like “… no… no, we’ve thought very hard and we’ll have General Dumas actually”

this did not make napoleon happy

in fact it made him jealous

napoleon felt so emasculated that he launched a campaign of revenge against General Dumas, including taking away his pension, that probably inspired a lot of Alexandre’s rather satisfying scenes in which fathers are nobly avenged and the money-grubbing villains are rubbed in the mud

liza-not-lisa-deactivated202401

I was never taught that he was Black either. WTF.

petermorwood

General Dumas (aka Thomas Alexandre Davy de La Pailleterie) looked like this…

…and like this…

…while “Napoleon has all the presence of yesterday’s plain Tesco hummus“…

:-D

I suspect Alexandre Dumas would have laughed at that, because besides looking like someone who laughed a lot…

…he was also a foodie.

sicktress

He was also born in present-day Haiti. Back then, it was the French colony of Saint-Domingue.

you-are-talking-about-this-deac

General Dumas was also the highest ranking officer of African descent to have command of a European army. EVER.

biblioaesthetica

His stuff is in the public domain, you can find them on Project Gutenberg here:

Project Gutenberg offers 73,007 free eBooks for Kindle, iPad, Nook, Android, and iPhone.

And for those of you who would like to try audio versions, this is what is on LibriVox, the free, volunteer run audiobook version of Project Gutenberg:

LibriVox

conleches

some fucking resources for all ur writing fuckin needs

body language masterlist

a translator that doesn’t eat ass like google translate does

a reverse dictionary for when ur brain freezes

550 words to say instead of fuckin said

638 character traits for when ur brain freezes again

some more body language help

bellero

REBLOG TO SAVE A WRITER

elizabethrobertajones

The fact that there's a War of the Magi era giant fucking Carbuncle Beaft in the North Horn is absolutely killing me. What do you mean that concept continued intact for thousands of years until the early Arcanists of that era cracked the formula. I have to assume they were given it by Lahabrea, who thought it would probably just eat them, and continue to hasten the Calamity. Because there's no way that's a practical beastie to summon.

Considering Carbuncles are supposed to be a starter-friendly summon of aether from a nice gem given form and that one is specifically Topaz Carbuncle while the first we met in Pandae was probably a proto Ruby Carbuncle, it does seem like some part of that core concept carried through. But the way Arcanists use them is a supportive aid to boost spells by channelling through/with them and they augment or cast the spells you know...

Proto Carbuncle made sense that an Ancient was messing with gemstones and managed to summon some sort of primordial elemental entity tied to the gem's aetheric pattern and discovered it was commandable or could learn spells but we saw it in um, a VERY early unstable form.

Okay so the final days are probably only months out at the time we are there. There's no time for that. But that means that the WORK to turn the great monstrous beast that bites and claws and gnashes into "kibty :3" being the work of MODERN arcanists (post-war of magi is modern to the Ancient timescale) to scrape off all the rough edges and wrestle the absolutely horrifying concept into something that you could teach a kid and not be remotely scared of awaking a monstrosity is... Incredible. Truly, the citizens of the post-sundering world are doing is so much better than the Ancients were.

They probably didn't even worry so much about the teeth because they were so much stronger and could un-Create it if it bothered them! But they were probably strong enough to control it anyway, so the teething problems (hehe) with the design probably would have been worked out into something still very big and scary for the Ancients to use if the End Times And Sundering hadn't interrupted their work, and a refined Carbuncle made by an Ancient would be almost as scary for an Arcanist to accidentally invoke as the raw form...

Meanwhile the early Arcanists were like "well that horror from the war was a mistake. Let's never do that again. Here's some calculus of an incomprehensible complexity that will turn this raw Creation magic we don't even realise is a version of what Ancient man once Wrought into something a bit more cuddly that won't cause any Calamities."

I haven't stopped laughing about it.