Expect Nothing Leave Disappointed

Grab a shovel we're lowering the bar

[porterdavis]

[epicsause-official]

just got an idea for a banger couples shirts design

[doomedmutual]

[philcollinsenjoyer]

about 90% of fanfiction takes place in a utopia where men are thoughtful and unsure of their place in the world

[mycatismyfriend]

@skulandcrossbones this might be the greatest tag on a reblog I’ve ever seen.

[warcrimesimulator]

[captain-price-returns]

Oh wow the 250th Fourth of July parade has been cancelled lol

[captain-price-returns]

Fun fact: the DC area will be hotter than 99% of the earth tomorrow!

[captain-price-returns]

Also I get the sense that very few people in DC are aware that federal officials wrote detailed analyses warning of the air quality health risks of the enormous 850K fireworks set to go off — and that the admin did not release those findings to the public

[homunculus-argument]

lmao the person who pulled a brexit on my friend group is currently accusing everyone else of acting childish for honouring the no-contact terms that she personally dictated. You can't just cut off everyone including your mother and then text her to ask her about the personal and private business of another family member you've disowned.

Girl you are 30 years old, how are you just now learning that if you slam a door shut on other peoples' faces, they might not want to open it for you anymore.

[yorgen-sh]

The Chinese shoe manufacturer decided to demonstrate the indestructibility of their shoes

[scarlettohairdye]

And also the indestructibility of that woman's ankles

[dvandom]

If that woman is still single, it's because everyone around her is a coward. (Or she's aro/ace, I suppose.)

[confusedguytoo]

while her ankles are the most consistently abused, she is rolling down stone steps in one shot. They aren't the only part of her that's indestructible

[dvandom]

Grown up Precure making money doing ads in her "civvies".

[hometoursandotherstuff]

[hometoursandotherstuff]

How Tech People Think:

[deadpowol]

[naamahdarling]

I love the implication that, as Larry is an "unpaid trainee", the dog is paid.

[smallpotatoes-dandelions]

I don't know how to articulate this well, but I really fucking hate the way a lot of thin writers write fat characters. Like how men write women "breasting boobily" there is something so dehumanizing about how fat characters are often written. "He waddled", "he lumbered", the writer of the book I'm reading always mentions this characters "fleshy hand" when he does something with his hand. Like, we already know that he's fat. There is no need to describe everything he does as "doing it fatly".

[sulkybender-retired04042026]

*fishes this absolute treasure from the tags*

[systlin]

Getting down on my knees and thanking the humans who invented dishwashers and washing machines.

[ihonestlydontknowwhattocallthis]

InsNe that dishwashers are more efficient and easier than just washing them manually but they also use less water. It’s a win win situation

[systlin]

They ALSO sterilize dishes, due to operating at a far higher temperature than human hands could ever tolerate. It's a win every way.

[systlin]

Made this post about 15 minutes after the repair guy who fixed the pump on my dishwasher packed up his tools and left, as the dishwasher was whirring along doing my dishes from that morning.

He said the exact same thing, which I did not know before that, so spreading this knowledge.

[hometoursandotherstuff]

[sceptixfakemon]

this heatwave fucking sucks how am I going to serve my liege like this

[sceptixfakemon]

im never leaving this hellsite

[sceptixfakemon]

i swear if this is the second stupid sword picture post i make that gets to 10k i'll just go kill someone

[sceptixfakemon]

FUCK OFF!!!!!!!!!!!

[prokopetz]

It kind of feels unfair that the Legend of Zelda franchise exists because it takes so many fun hypotheticals off the table. "Which video game series would be the worst if you had to invent a timeline where all games occur in chronological release order" no bet, it's Zelda. It's always fucking Zelda.

[poondragoon]

That's why I love Zelda.

I've never seen another series be so openly contemptuous of canon or continuity, like it was purpose-built to screw with fastidious nerds who are allergic to non-Watsonian reasoning.

Forget the timeline, just look at the geography! Is Kakariko village a Western European hamlet bordering a forest? An Edo-period thatch-roof village high in the mountains? A tin shack ghost town in a desert slot canyon? Is Lake Hylia to the south, southwest, or southeast of Hyrule Castle? How do entire provinces just materialize, disappear, and jump across the country between installments? How many continents does Hyrule span across? The obvious Doylist explanation is that Hyrule has vastly different geographies depending on what best serves the flow and pacing of the game. The Watsonian explanation is that there is no Watsonian explanation.

It is, as an intellectual property, disinterested in maintaining continuity to a degree that is nothing short of impressive in today's media landscape. What events from prior games are canon? The minimum necessary to contextualize the immediate plot of the game you're currently playing, so somewhere between none of them and all of them simultaneously. What Zelda game is [Insert Zelda Title] a sequel/prequel to? Throw a fucking dart.

The fact that its nominal genre has it bumping shoulders with Tolkien is just icing on the cake.

[depsidase]