Official Penis Posts

ASKS ARE CLOSED okay theres a lot of penis Okay usually just things that look like penises (Please do not send literal dick pics!) My pronouns are whatever is funnies any literal penises will be tagged ‘Hog Alert!’ Per the poll

[xvisualtreasure08x]

[gar-wafflez]

@official-penis-posts

[official-penis-posts]

[halondrus]

oh me? I lost my penis when I ignored the "Don't touch the machinery" sign. you know how it is

[halondrus]

you all hate me and my penis. I mean penisnt

[halondrus]

I made the mistake of looking at this while taking an order over the headset at work and started laughing really hard and had to gather myself for a second and my coworkers kept trying to look at my phone to see what I was laughing at

[halondrus]

nearly ran a redlight thinking about >penis ripped off by penis gnomes on my way home from work

[virtualgirladvance]

putting this post on every machine from now on thank you

[official-penis-posts]

Penwas :(

[escuerzoresucitado]

[churlsgonewild]

[cheesefags]

from bearvivant, an, uh, very appealing cheese

Check out the actual thing, Stinking Bishop, here

[official-penis-posts]

Sometimes it be like that

[paperandpencilsandskips]

Let's all fuck the jpg

[official-penis-posts]

I’m always down for ai-sloppy seconds

[cheesefags]

2-YEAR CHEDDAR

from GRAFTON VILLAGE

I usually try to review cheeses virginally - that is, ones that I’ve never had before. In this case, this is a cheddar I’ve had many times before. But I couldn’t leave it off the blog, what with its obvious appeal to leather and rubber fetishists.

As far as cheddars go, Grafton’s 2-year aged isn’t going to shock you. It’s mild, light on the salt, with a slightly sweet and grassy flavour. It’s got a nice texture. It’s dense, more moist than I expected, and smooth.

So what is the deal with the gummi suit on this cheese anyway? Well, cheese has obviously been around a lot longer than fridges. Fresh cheeses like mozzarella are too moist to last very long outside of a cold place (bacteria and fungi do so love damp places), though I don’t think anyone was too mad about eating that stuff quickly. But cheeses that have been aged (and dried) more have some more preservation options, which is where cheese wax comes in. The wax is a physical barrier, stopping fungal spores from landing, and also blocks moisture and air, making the cheese a pretty unfriendly place to grow. Even drier cheeses can be bandaged in cheesecloth and then slathered in lard to preserve them while allowing some ventilation.

I gotta admit: hot wax isn’t really my thing. But cheesecloth bondage and grease… it has potential.

[dumbpuppyfag]

this site used to be awesome

[atapi]

jesus christ

[samflynn]

[chakwas]

IT IS THE BEATING OF HIS HIDEOUS HEART

[official-penis-posts]

I’m sorry but it looks like Pikachu is playing peekaboo with his butthole 

[ofcoursethatsathing]

10-Inch Glow in the Dark T-Rex

link...

[official-penis-posts]

[the-toy-boy]

[official-penis-posts]

Excuse me sir but someone appears to have stuffed a whole ass puppy in your underoos

[xvisualtreasure08x]

[gar-wafflez]

@official-penis-posts

[official-penis-posts]

I love it when the penis has a penis. It’s penises all the way down!

[ofcoursethatsathing]

10-Inch Glow in the Dark T-Rex

link...

[thelovelygods]

[official-penis-posts]

Quick somebody fuck Claude

[shiftythrifting]

“unique”

[official-penis-posts]

Who hasn’t wanted to suck Grogu’s—

Wait I forgot how bongs worked for a second

—brain I guess. Post cancelled

[hometoursandotherstuff]

[gar-wafflez]

apparently this is a real frame

[ham-and-cheese-studios]

@official-penis-posts

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

req'd by @autisticbisexualsokka

gotta make this horde house a horde home

text: Please emphasize the D when you talk about your Horde house

[official-penis-posts]

I emphasize the D when I’m talking about anything 

[bigassbowlingballhead]

the internet is full of the dumbest, cruelest people you'll ever meet. but at least there's porn.