Call me Coffee

she/he || Welcome to my page! Writer | sapphic craziness

[coffeesgrandsarcasm]

Welcome to My Blog!

It's been a hot minute since I started this blog, so I figured it's about time for me to make an intro post :>

Call me Coffee, I'm a 20yo disabled person from the US and I use he/she pronouns. I'm a fandom fanatic, writer of both fanfiction and original work, and woman lover. Also an undergrad law student :D

I'll say it up front: bigotry is never allowed here. I'm a feminist and anti-racist. I'm religion-friendly, LGBTQ+ friendly, anti-TERF, and a disability advocate. I'm pro-Ukraine and pro-Palestine. I'm anti-capitalist and pro-punk as well.

Another thing: No AI is allowed on this blog. You will never see me using AI at all. I don't trust AI any further than I can throw it.

About my fandom involvement:

Main Fandoms: DSMP, Bones, Leverage / Leverage: Redemption, Librarians, the Marvel Cinematic Universe, Hazbin Hotel, Rizzoli and Isles, and the X-Files.

My Work: I have a couple Dream SMP works on AO3, and I'm currently involved in a Syndicate Zine coming out in January! If you'd like to read, here's my AO3 page :3

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

...Yeah, I think that's about it! Drop a hi in my asks, I'm happy to know that somebody read this! :P

Last Updated: 12/14/25

[coffeesgrandsarcasm]

My second fic for the @voicesfortheblade event, for @lennjamin-o7!! Still the 1st for fifteen more minutes!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/85985106/chapters/227324211

Thank you Lennjamin for the prompt!!!

Title: Ain't No Mountain High Enough (To Keep Me From Getting to You)

Fandom: Dream SMP

Relationships: Technoblade and Phil Watson | Philza

Summary:

If today were a normal day, Philza would be swooping over the streets of Nita City, sharp eyes locating any criminals from a pickpocket to a gaggle of villains running from a bank. He’d be perching on rooftops, hand to his ear to receive information from his comm. He might have even been stuck in a meeting or two.

He glances out the window of Icarus, and only sees a forest below.

[simkaye]

Pride prints are back in stock but leaving soon! 🐹🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️

[avo0930]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TECHNOBLADE 🎂 i miss him sm recently

[coffeesgrandsarcasm]

My first fic for the @voicesfortheblade 2026 event is up! Thank you to my friend @itsnotmystic for your participation and prompt (I think it's hilarious I chose your prompt of all people!)

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Title: Take a Break (Let's Go Upstate)

Fandom: SMP Earth

Relationships: Technoblade and Phil Watson | Philza

Summary:

“Mate, what are you doing?”

Technoblade, fourth son of the Piglin Clan Blade, Emperor of the Antarctic Empire, the infamous Blood God, glances up from the pile of paperwork on his desk to make eye contact with Philza Minecraft, one of the last crow-type Elytrians, Emperor of the Antarctic Empire, the Angel of Death. Instantly he shrinks under the look his best friend levels at him, a withering glare of disappointment for reasons Techno must fail to remember on his own but is very likely about to be reminded of.

“Uh…” he starts, eloquently, before closing his mouth and trying again. “Working?”

[achillesinhighheels]

[captainstarburst]

this is not to say you shouldn't make characters with strabismus- you should! i want to see people with my disabilities! but i think a little research can go a long way. i'd love to see it given more depth in writing than just being an indicator of intelligence (which it isn't and never has been!)

[motto-chanto-itte]

sometimes it's OK to skip a song you like when u don't feel like it at that moment. u r not hurting its feelings

[unofficial-autism-post]

Unofficial Autism Post

[crabussy]

a terf just told my friend he's an "18 year old with genders" and I'm in tears laughing about it. ewwww do you have genders don't touch me what if it's contagious

[3rabbit]

daughter (non-practicing)

[3rabbit]

sister (deadbeat)

[alorz]

i feel like I'm seeing more and more she/he he/hers she/hims every day and it makes me so fucking happy . guygirls and girlguys one day we might even get our pronouns on a pin

[peri]

seeing support for lazy eye in any form is so fucking rare and it bums me out. shoutout to people who have a constant lazy eye. shoutout to people who have an occasional lazy eye. shoutout to people who have both eyes that are lazy. shoutout to people who are somewhere in between, a mix, or have a lazy eye in an entirely new way or in a way that is hard to describe. i love you. you don't look stupid, you don't look unattractive. you are beautiful as you are, and anyone who sees you lesser for this isn't worth your time.

[buttpoems]

[daysleftofsecondterm]

1,000 days left

[legalityoftheraccoons]

WWOWOHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO YESSSSSSSS IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS FOR OVER A HUNDRED DAYS AT THIS POINT

[daysleftofsecondterm]

460 days to be precise!

[the-forest-library]

kill the imposter syndrome in your head because not only is there someone out there doing it worse than you, they’re also using chat gpt to do it

[corvids-calling]

i reblog so many of your posts tagged for elairo with my tag for alistair i think they would be interesting to put in a room together

they might become friends or they might kill each other. very real chance alistair tries to put a knife to their throat but hey whats a little death threat between friends!

CARDS THIS IS SO FUNNY TO ME YOU HAVE NO IDEA

Another moot of mine @coffeesgrandsarcasm and I realized our guys also had a lot in common and we DID put them in a room together (cough a weird mix of Limbo from dsmp/Shadowfell from d&d) and Coffee's guy did try to put a sword through Elairo upon first meeting

Alistair sounds so cool tho!!! If u ever wanna put elairo and alistair in a room together, hey, my dm's are always open! Or if u just wanna word vomit about them I'd love to listen yesyes.

What's a little death threat between friends!

[emberphoenixisgoingtolivee]

phrases of international online friends

"what do YOU guys call it"

"isn't it [insert time here] over there????"

"GO THE FUCK TO BED"

"good morning" (it's 6pm in your timezone)

"do you have/say [thing] over there"

"how's the weather over there?" (probably better than yours)