comets (?)

| hi, you can call me comet! | they/them |

[comets0ksure]

rip sirius black you would’ve loved conan gray

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in celebration of pride month, i would like everyone to remember that link has all the gender and is not planning on giving it back

[comets0ksure]

i feel so mean because i can feel myself slowly getting distant from my friends, while simultaneously making different friends elsewhere

i just find them annoying and i feel so awful about it because they're so sweet they just get on my nerves

maybe its cause im depressed bro idk

maybe i subconsciously want to be "cool" and "well perceived" (this is true) and i dont like them as much anymore because i inherently value people based on their usefulness to me. but i dunno maybe that isnt true and i just twist my perception of myself because im depressed.

yk what i also feel like an asshole about? i judge people based on their grades because the only reason i think i have worth is because my grades are good. and i feel like an asshole for saying my grades are good even though they objectively are

i have above 100 in two subjects for gods sake i know im smart and thats all everyone ever tells me but ik that other peoples value dont depend on grades. only mine (this is also a side affect of being depressed. fuck this shit bro)

but im worried that im subconsciously judging my best friend cause she gets a c average in a math subject cause i dont want to do that . cause thats mean i dont wanna be mean

i just dont even know anymore all the days are blending together

i dont want to be mean

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jigsaw by conan gray perfectly describes both sirius AND regulus with insane accuracy and in this essay i will-

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alive gabe goodman and hes a theater kid and the school does hadestown and hes ORPHEUS HEAR ME OUT-

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yk in high school during lunch whenever me and my friends wanted a boy who was standing too close to our table to go away we started talking slightly too loudly about pads and tampons. for some mysterious reason, the boy always left quite quickly. fun times.

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i love always being the second choice

or the replacement

and the one you wont talk to outside of class

its so fun

<3

[comets0ksure]

holy fuck i am so tired of getting queerbaited

[comets0ksure]

rare aesthetic*: getting super depressed at 11-18 lying on every question of those forms they give you at the doctors to see how depressed you are

*btw, depression and mental illness is not an aesthetic and should not be treated like one. i only said “aesthetic” for fun times

[comets0ksure]

i remember one time i was getting tested for adhd, and the doctor asked, "what would you do if you had an essay due in 2 weeks? when would you start?" (we were talking about how much procrastinating was an issue for me)

and i just remember. panicking. because my mom was sitting right next to me and i didn't know what to say because i'd never had an essay due in two weeks before - what was i supposed to say? whose response should i say? my mom, who wanted me to say something acceptable, the doctor, who didn't give two shits about me, or me, who had idea, but assumed the answer was probably the night it was due?

but i had never had an essay due in two weeks before. i honestly didn't know.

so i just said, "a few days before?"

and the doctor said, "well thats not really procrastinating, is it?"

and thats how i didnt get diagnosed!

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you asked "why are you crying" and i said i wasn't crying and you kept asking and asking and now suddenly. i'm crying.

[comets0ksure]

i love being gay. one of my favorite activities, actually.

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when you can have deep philosophical conversations online but cannot speak to each other irl bc of how awkward it is >>>>>>>>>

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when i was a kid (like 5 or 6), i was talking to my dad about a girl in my class who had two moms.

he asked me what i thought about that, and all i said was, "it's cool, it's like how mom has two candles. can i have my juice now?"

AND THATS HOW YOU RAISE A NON-HOMOPHOBIC KID. not that hard i fear

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i am still living because i am going to outlive jkr if i do.

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swimming is wild bc i'm not even 25 yet. how do i have chronic shoulder pain.

😭😭

[comets0ksure]

james sirius potter is a theatre kid.

thats it.