Legless Fugitive

My name is ___ and I like ___

[trollitics]

[classicalmonoblogue]

Apparently the dude who runs the crematorium is just fundamentally confused about how advertising works. He actually thought that the way you made an ad was you found a picture that got people’s attention … and then also included information about your company. He was genuinely surprised and baffled when people thought there was any relationship between the (independently nonsensical) captioned image and his cremation business. There were two more ads in the series that are equally, just… so much…

_______________________________________________________________

[cornerof5thandvermouth]

this is somehow incredibly effective tbh

[memix]

Petition for all advertisements to be shitposts from now on

[batfamcreys]

[gailsimone]

These pages have been going around a lot lately. It;s from a story I wrote for Wonder Woman’s 75th Anniversary Special, and I am reblogging to make sure that the artist/co-creator, Colleen Doran, gets proper credit for making Star-Blossom so adorable! :)

[disneydatass]

Proof Wall-e was actually a lesbian:

Fell in love with eve in .2 seconds

Terrible at communication

Obsessed with musicals like hello dolly

Literally spent 90 minutes working up the courage to hold hands with her crush

[thursday]

[avery-universe-deactivated20150]

oh my fucking god

[wenchyfloozymoo]

[thighetician]

The second girl at least read the book to confirm that it was shit, she even had Capote on deck as backup. Chick 1 is just lazy

[kaylapocalypse-deactivated20201]

Nope. Girl 2 saw that Girl 1′s absolutely accurate analysis was being shut down just because it wasn’t stated in an intellectual way (in spite of its validity). So Girl 2 reinforced Girl 1′s opinions in solidarity and made sure that it was absolutely clear that Girl 1 was factually correct. WITHOUT taking credit for her observations (”kim is right” instead of “Actually, kim”)  

Girls supporting Girls. 

Girls not letting other girls be treated poorly.

[sweaterkittensahoy]

If you read thirty pages of a book and hate it, that’s a good analysis. Girl 1 literally said, “It sucked for these reasons, and I only got through 30 pages.” She was absolutely paying attention and trying to get it. But if all you get is a headache, fuck that book.

[mckitterick]

I love this exchange

[justhere4coffee]

I don’t care how beloved a story is, if I can’t enjoy reading it I ain’t gonna read it. I learned too late in life that you’re allowed to put a book down if you’re not having fun - life’s too short!

[weloveshortvideos]

[breadandflowers]

Why would you put raw chicken into a soup and have it cook in the broth and spread its disgusting pathogens and shit. That’s a chunk of a raw dead animal just floating in your soup 😷

[railroadsoftware]

that’s how…. cooking works

[shin-hero-buster]

Vegans having 0 understanding of food aside, that looks super fucking good.

[30-minute-memes]

[rythen]

The onion isnt even in the vicinity of fucking around

[gahdamnpunk]

ALL 👏🏾 OF 👏🏾 THEM 👏🏾

[knitmeapony]

This post goes harder than any post has ever gone before.

[godisablckwoman-deactivated2019]

Keira Knightley when she’s offered projects that take place in modern day society

[theheartisalonelyhunter]

[missmentelle]

How to Tell Your Friend That You Need a Break From Supporting Them

When I worked at a mental health crisis centre, I couldn’t believe how many people came to us, not because of their own problems, but because they were so lost in a friend’s pain that they couldn’t take it anymore. I saw a lot of people who were so worn down from helping someone else that they couldn’t sleep, eat, socialize or focus at work or school. They were consumed with guilt every time they put down their phones, went to sleep, or dared to enjoy themselves and have a good time. All because they had no idea how to set boundaries.  Helping your friends through a tough situation is a wonderful and noble thing to do, but it only works if you’re mentally in a place to do so. If you’re dealing with issues or mental illness of your own, you’re not always capable of being someone else’s shoulder to cry on 24/7. And that’s okay. Sometimes, you have to put yourself first. You can’t help someone else if you’re a mess yourself. You can’t save a drowning person with a sinking ship.  Telling a friend that you’re overwhelmed and you need a break is one of the hardest things you’ll ever have to do. Honesty is the best policy - don’t go radio silent on them, or avoid answering their messages. Be honest about how you’re feeling, and what you need from them. If you’re stuck on what to say and how to start the conversation, here are a few suggestions. Feel free to copy them exactly: It’s really hard for me to admit this, but I’ve been feeling like I’m on the verge of a breakdown lately. I love you and I care about you, but I need to take some time to take care of myself for a while.  I’m really concerned about you, but I honestly don’t know how to deal with this and I’m worried I’ll say the wrong thing. I really think that you should talk to a professional about this.  This is hard for me to admit, but I have a lot going on in my life right now, and it’s getting to be too much for me. Would it be okay if we talked about lighter stuff for the next little while?

You deserve more support than I can give you. I think you need to tell a close family member or professional about what’s going on. 

It seems like every time we talk about this, things are worse for you. I’m worried that my advice isn’t helping you at all, and I think you should talk to someone more qualified than me. 

I’m really worried for your safety, and it breaks my heart, but I can’t keep you safe all by myself. Would it be okay if we told someone else what was going on? 

I’m sorry, but I can’t answer my text messages 24 hours per day. I really want to make sure that you always have someone to turn to if I’m not available. Are there some other people you would trust with this? I can help you tell them, if you’re not comfortable doing it by yourself.  I hope these suggestions are helpful - best of luck to all of you, and make sure to put your own mental health first when you have to. 

[acakewalkofcrocodiles]

Found it! 

[wembleyfragglesarchive]

i’m losing my mind

[friendlyfrankenstein]

bert was always my favorite muppet as a kid and TBH I stand by this as an adult. 

[friendlyfrankenstein]

anyways its been like four days and I have yet to stop laughing even slightly less at ‘OH GROOVE WITH ME BABY’ (THUNK THUNK THUNK) so 

im starting to suspect bert and ernie sketches were just the basis of my sense of humor

[lame-and-corny-blog]

[goldensweetcheeks-deactivated20]

COME ON NA OBAMA! 👏🏾

[onlyblackgirl]

He ain’t wearing a jacket no more and he got his sleeves rolled up. My nigga is over it.

[usagibarbie]

Can we please re-elect him 😩😭 just give him another 4 years

[thisisarebeljyn]

My favorite random Brooklyn 99 thing is that when Rosa does her fake voice, the fake voice is how Stephanie Beatriz actually talks.

[deadcatwithaflamethrower]

people I still want to stab over a decade later:

Creative Writing Professor at a former college: Welcome to creative writing! By the way, you will not write fantasy, ghost stories, pranormal, or science fiction in this class, as this is a creative writing course.”

[morgynleri]

What the ever loving fuck is with “creative” writing professors who think that speculative fiction of any stripe ISN’T CREATIVE?

[thebibliosphere]

I still remember my own creative writing teacher telling me this because he saw the Terry Pratchett book on my desk and got this smug smirk on his face like “aha, gotcha”. He had the nerve to pick it up and call it “popularist fiction”, like somehow being popular and easily accessible made it less inherent in intellectual value.

I had it in my back pack because I did my final thesis on the evolution of mythology and folk tails into fantasy and sci-fi and the societal importance of telling stories (before anyone asks, no I don’t have it, I lost it when I moved continents), and I used Terry Pratchett because there wasn’t a single humanitarian issue the man did not touch on.

Which I told him. And then he kind of floundered and went “ah, well but, it’s…well I mean it’s not exactly high brow”, like neither the fuck was Shakespeare or Dickens you self-important turnip. Dickens was literally selling his stories by the chapter. He was the popular author of his time. Shakespeare was too, he fucking made up words and phrases all the time because the language he needed to express himself didn’t exist in the way he needed it too.

Intellectual elitism is nothing more than a hold over from class warfare and the belief that only certain people should get to be truly educated. And it needs to be smashed.

[jokin-around]

Tom hardy’s oddly small princess peach lips have been banished from cinema for 10 years only to be released for a single, all important purpose, kissing venom

[jxpper]

Show this photo to your daughters as they grow up.

Show them that courage is important, even in the scariest of situations. This woman stood up and faced her fears, spoke her truth in front of a group of men while balancing the world on her shoulders. She is a hero. She is a representation for all women who are done being assaulted and abused.

I Believe Dr. Christine Blasey Ford

[fluorescentnova]

Show it to them because our mothers didn’t show us this one:

Who is she? Anita Hill. 

What’s she doing here? Testifying about the sexual misconduct of then supreme court nominee Clarence Thomas aka now the most senior justice on the Supreme Court.

Please Learn About Her

[neuroticgaymusings-deactivated2]