For a short period of time last year, about a month, our schedule was a little bit of a clusterfuck. I don't drive, so my partner's the only one who can run errands or pick up our kid, and the public bus line here is a joke. And, of course, they cut the school-run bus routes in half so, even though it's too far to walk, my kid has relied on us to get them to school for the last three years.
We're all but forced to depend on having our own car.
So, when we had this brief span of time when it would be about two hours between school and when my partner could pick up our kid, we had to scramble for options.
Everything near the school consisted of mostly restaurants and stores, and we already knew they'd get kicked out for buying nothing (or even the bare minimum in a lot of cases) and hanging out there while they waited (ridiculous, considering how dead most fast food lobbies are these days; what do you care if a kid sits quietly on their phone??)
Add to that the fact that, if they could manage to do that, it would mean we'd have to pay for fast food every. single. day. just to make sure they could stay in the building.
The only other nearby option, we thought, would be perfect. It was the public library. Safe, well-lit, with things to do and places to charge your phone, and free.
They only went once.
When my partner picked them up that first day, my kid got in the car with a nice little pre-printed notice that they probably have stacks of, ready to go in case a child dares to exist in what is supposed to be a safe space. (Remember when we were specifically taught to go to libraries if we needed a safe space? I sure do!!)
If we left them there again, the paper (very patronizingly) told us, they would call CPS if we didn't pick them up before close. Before close.
My kid is fifteen. Not five. Fifteen. And they weren't allowed to hang out in a well-lit outdoor space with no traffic for five fucking minutes after close without getting told to fuck off. At six pm.
So, yeah, there's really nowhere for kids to go anymore, and it's so stressful for parents and kids both. It was so upsetting for them, and we had to do so much maneuvering and calling in of favors to cover this brief span of time. All so my kid would have a ride home, because god forbid a teenager be allowed to exist.
And no, public library and anyone else who wants to try me, it is not bad parenting to allow your teenager to hang out on their own for an hour or so after school. In fact, it's good for them to start learning to navigate safe spaces on their own. Pretty cool that we're not allowed to do that anymore!! 🥴
blakekathryn
janainaart
tangentwithtanner
germansingergirl
kaledo-art
