Magneto did nothing wrong.

Hello. Lauren. Milwaukee. She/Her. I come here to share all things wholesome, good, & sometimes spooky. Heretic. Depressed af, but healing. www.instagram.com/laurensporens www.twitter.com/darkmagelauren

[tinylobelia-deactivated20200702]

[wisteriafield]

i’ll kick anyone’s ass. i’ll kick your ass. i’ll kick your dog’s ass. i’ll kick my own ass

[halloweentrickortreat]

"Sorry I can't, I'm busy"

Me being busy:

[willgrahamscock]

[theebbestboy]

[a-sentient-cup]

[virtualgirladvance]

[sausaged-rat]

[lobsterflaws]

[butchification-ray]

Remmick sinners funny moments, ft my version of Femmick. you get one regular Remmick on the right as a treat but its me making fun of him sorry:/

[souplups]

…

[deathonmars]

a closer look at remmick's fangs... i'm normal about this

[axelboneboy]

FINALLY! VAMPIRE TEETH THAT ARE JAGGED AND DONT LOOK LIKE POINTY VENEERS

[loo-nuh-tik]

Oh, we heard tale of a party.

Sinners (2025) dir. Ryan Coogler

[darkmagepoppers]

zuckerberg talking about masculinity and he looks like a fuckin trout

[mlarayoukai-archive]

*pulls on your balls a little too hard*

[timelyenigma]

[darkmagepoppers]

Anytime u do this to a cis het man their mouth opens up like a pez dispenser

[hamletthedane]

I’ve watched this video so many times I swear I’ve memorized it.

“DON’T GET ME STARTED ON THE FUCKING NAVY-“

[coolhotdad]

my perfect crime? I memorize the entirety of the macy’s store inventory. I then go on aliexpress.com and find exact replicas of every single purse in the store. I break in at 3am, and replace every purse with a cheaper version of the purse. I take my real purses home and open up an online store on the darknet featuring fake purses. I then sell these real purses as fake purses, making it so that when the feds catch on to my antics, they spend countless years trying to figure out who can replicate purses this well, and who is selling them. Soon an entire division of the FBI is dedicated to finding me and figuring out how my “fake” purses appear to be real. 45 years later they finally trace my ip address and break into my villa in texas and shoot me right in the leg when i attempt to flee. While this would normally not be a fatal wound, due to my constant devotion to my online fake real purse storefront i have suffered an iron deficiency for 35 years. My blood can’t clot and I start to bleed out. Turns out the woman who shot me was a girl who i made out with once in college, and she holds my dying body in her arms and asks me how my fake purses were so real. I spend the last moments of my fleeting life telling her about how every five years i break into a different Macy’s and replace all the purses, and that the purses I have been selling online for a severely discounted price were actually all real, and I have been doing this purely for the gag of it all. When my former college girlfriend gets home from work after rightfully murdering me for my crimes, she goes into her walk in closet, looks at the 13 gucci purses she owns, and realizes that they’re all fakes.

[littlecofiegirl]

On the long holidays my Circadian rythm is like FUCK YEAH we're back to the genetically engineered 6 hours of sleep between 4 am and 10am. Yiss!

My body refreshed, my crops watered, my updates downloaded and so on.

End of the holiday...

Circa: Wha- what are you doing? Gettjng up at 6??? Why? What about the genetic hours? Why??? Go to sleep at 10pmHA! Sure okay... i mean its probably an emergency...

Me: Between 10pm and 6 am it's 8 hours! It should be enough! Why am I tired?

Circa: When is this emergency shift over? I cant keep you running on adrenaline. Thats stressfull to all of us.

Me: it'S NOT an emergency!!

Circa: *looks at the genes* based on these notes, it sure looks like it is, but okay we'll try.

Me: sleeps 6-8 hours and is tired all day.

Circa: This is not your normal sleep schedule.

Me: . . . I know, but can you help me out? Can you actually make me fall asleep at 10-11pm and allow me to get up at 6am?

Circa: sure. You just have to take some extra hours of your day, every day, to completely tire all your muscles out into exhaustion.... and some sleepy pills. To make sure your normal brain activity turns off at 10pm. I cant promise not to wake you up at 3 am though... cos you know... *looks at the gene table*.... but lets make a deal if you can sneak in a nap in the middle of the day... somewhere between 12-15pm from 20min to 4 hours then i can keep your brain functions normal. It will make you not tired at 10 pm though... but brain...

Me: . . . : (

[viktor-the-leshen]

[rosslynpaladin]

I want this BLAZED across tumblr like a banner at the top of the screen, permanently

[clarasunflowers]

[cinikuscirmi-deactivated2025043]

csuuuszkalnak

[facklewackle]

they sure do

[ganondorf]

ppl are rlly trying to defend being on your phone during a movie in the theater what is going on

[ganondorf]

using your phone in a movie theater is a symptom of long covid

[cicada-and-pomegranate]

the defense of being on your phone in a movie theater is who cares? by your own admission, you should be paying attention to the movie. so why do you care what other people are doing? you’re meant to be paying attention to the movie.

[ganondorf]

[claudiagray]

If you're in a theater during a movie/play/other performance and for whatever reason you cannot, cannot, cannot bear going any longer without checking your phone, LEAVE THE THEATER. There is a lobby or restroom waiting for you.

[darkmagepoppers]

I'm with the "PUT YOUR FUCKING PHONE AWAY" guy

[ganondorf]

ppl are rlly trying to defend being on your phone during a movie in the theater what is going on

[ganondorf]

using your phone in a movie theater is a symptom of long covid

[cicada-and-pomegranate]

the defense of being on your phone in a movie theater is who cares? by your own admission, you should be paying attention to the movie. so why do you care what other people are doing? you’re meant to be paying attention to the movie.

[ganondorf]

[claudiagray]

If you're in a theater during a movie/play/other performance and for whatever reason you cannot, cannot, cannot bear going any longer without checking your phone, LEAVE THE THEATER. There is a lobby or restroom waiting for you.