𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐎𝐅𝐅𝐈𝐂𝐄 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒 (a collection of prompts from the TV show “The Office”, feel free to adjust phrasing and gendered terms as necessary)
“Get a friend, loser.”
“Congratulations, universe. You win.”
“You know what I want to do today? I want to marry you.”
“In the end, the greatest snowball isn’t a snowball at all. It’s fear. Merry Christmas.”
“The eyes are the groin of the face.”
“Not ‘enough’ for me? You are everything.”
“Nothing stresses me out. Except having to seek the approval of my inferiors.”
“You cheated on me? When I specifically asked you not to?”
“It’s never too early for ice cream.”
“The worst thing about prison was the dementors.”
“I’m an early bird and I’m a night owl. So I’m wise and I have worms.”
“I knew exactly what to do. But in a much more real sense, I had no idea what to do.”
“Who says exactly what they’re thinking? What kind of a game is that?”
“I mean, I’m not a slut but who knows.”
“When you’re a kid, you assume your parents are soulmates. My kids are gonna be right about that.”
“Mistletoe is not an excuse for sexual assault.”
“There’s a lot of beauty in ordinary things. Isn’t that kind of the point?”
“There are two things I am passionate about: recycling and revenge.”
“Life is short. Drive fast and leave a sexy corpse. That’s one of my mottos.”
“I talk a lot, so I learn to tune myself out.”
“Wow, you love me-love me. I love you-love you.”
“[name], you ignorant slut.”
“I feel God in this Chili’s tonight.”
“I will raise a hundred children with a hundred of your lovers if it means I can be with you.”
“Do I need to be liked? Absolutely not. I like to be liked. I enjoy being liked. I have to be liked, but it’s not like this compulsive need to be liked, like my need to be praised.”
“I just want to be friends. Plus a little extra. Also, I love you.”
“It’s a good thing Russia doesn’t exist anymore.”
“Tell him to call me ASAP as possible.”
“Fool me once, strike one. Fool me twice, strike three.”
“Well, happy birthday Jesus. Sorry that your party’s so lame.”
“I’m not superstitious but I am a little stitious.”
“I don’t hate it. I just don’t like it at all and it’s terrible.”
“I am Beyonce, always.”











