Sure Is Great In The Year 1974

Roleplay blog for Crackerjack from my declared dead au

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

Hello, my name’s Crackerjack Sugarman! I’m 51 years old. The year is 1974. A couple years ago, I adopted my nephew, BoJack Horseman—now BoJack Sugarman.

Back in 1944, I got separated from my troop. I narrowly escape becoming a POW. Long story short, I ended up on the run throughout Europe, and it took me a long time to return home. Unfortunately, I was mistakenly through to be dead by my platoon, which caused some problems for my family… but that’s all in the past now!! I’m a dad now, and everything is better!

Feel free to ask me anything!

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

Great oogly moogly, someone cut me off in traffic today! Boy am I cross! It really burned my briskets!

[baguettewolf08]

Honey Sugarman Aesthetic

[resourcesofaqueen]

Thematic Headcanons. A series of subject-specific headcanons you can ask your favorite blog and muse.

hc + 🤝 for a headcanon about a connection with one of the receiver's mutual

hc + 👪 for a family-themed headcanon

hc + 🧡 for a friendship-themed headcanon

hc + 💌 for a romance-themed headcanon

hc + 💕 for a loved-themed headcanon

hc + 💔 for a headcanon about a sad experience

hc + 🤥 for a lie-themed headcanon

hc + 😶 for a headcanon about a secret they know of / keep

hc + 😴 for a sleep-themed headcanon

hc + 🌇 for a headcanon about morning- or evening rituals

hc + 🧼 for a hygiene-themed headcanon

hc + 🏠 for a home-themed headcanon

hc + 😃 for a happiness-themed headcanon

hc + 😨 for a fear-themed headcanon

hc + 🤕 for a pain-themed headcanon

hc + 🚶‍♂️ for a habit-themed headcanon

hc + 👍 for a headcanon about things they like

hc + 👎 for a headcanon about things they dislike

hc + 💪 for a sport-themed headcanon

hc + 😡 for a headcanon about something that makes them angry

hc + 👻 for a headcanon about supernatural occurrences

hc + 🥣 for a food-themed headcanon

hc + ☕ for a drink-themed headcanon

hc + 🐈 for a pet/animal-themed headcanon

hc + 🌸 for a plant-themed headcanon

hc + 🌄 for an outdoor-themed headcanon

hc + 🌍 for a travel-themed headcanon

hc + 🗡 for a weapon-themed headcanon

hc + 🎡 for a hobby-themed headcanon

hc + 🚗 for a transportation-themed headcanon

hc + ⏳ for a time-themed headcanon

hc + 🌘 for a night-themed headcanon

hc + 🌞 for a day-themed headcanon

hc + 🪐 for a universe-themed headcanon

hc + 🌂 for a weather-themed headcanon

hc + ⛄ for a season-themed headcanon

hc + 🎉 for a celebration-themed headcanon

hc + 🏆 for a goal-themed headcanon

hc + 💯 for an achievement-themed headcanon

hc + 🚬 for a headcanon about a bad habit

hc + 🎭 for an arts-/crafts-themed headcanon

hc + ✂️ for a hair-themed headcanon

hc + 👗 for a clothes-themed headcanon

hc + 💍 for a jewelry-themed headcanon

hc + 💄 for a makeup-themed headcanon

hc + 🎓 for an education-themed headcanon

hc + 📿 for a faith-themed headcanon

hc + 🎵 for a music-themed headcanon

hc + 📱 for a media-themed headcanon

hc + 🎥 for a film/tv-themed headcanon

hc + 📔 for a reading-themed headcanon

hc + 💰 for a money-themed

hc + 💼 for a job-themed headcanon

hc + 💉 for a medical-themed headcanon

hc + 🛒 for a shopping-themed headcanon

hc + 🔞 for a nsfw-headcanon

hc + ❓ for a headcanon of the receiver's choice

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

OOC

I gots no ideas rn… so I’ll probably only post if I’m @ed or if I get asks lol

[babybojackhorseman]

Feeling lonely the little foal hugs your leg he craves attention. @declared-dead-crackerjack

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

[Crackerjack reaches down and ruffles his mane]

Heya, kiddo. What’s up?

[babybojackhorseman]

[He looked nervous rubbing his paws he spoke with a hint of expecting the answer to be no] Can we go to the park today?

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

[Crackerjack puts a reassuring hand on Bojack’s shoulder]

Sure thing, kiddo! Maybe we could get some ice cream too, hmm?

[babybojackhorseman]

Feeling lonely the little foal hugs your leg he craves attention. @declared-dead-crackerjack

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

[Crackerjack reaches down and ruffles his mane]

Heya, kiddo. What’s up?

[youngbeatricesugarman]

Bojack took his first steps today! I couldn't find my camera in time...

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

Aww🥺

[youngbeatricesugarman]

He's unstoppable now. I really have to keep him from walking into just about anything. Good thing my apartment doesn't have stairs...

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

Yep, good thing! I remember once when I was little, I thought I could use Blinky (my baby blanket) like a cape or a parachute or something, and fly down the stairs! Needless to say, it did not work. I bruised and scrapped my knee up pretty good

[youngbeatricesugarman]

Oh, that sounds horrible. What did mother do?

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

Mama comforted me, of course. Pops was there when I fell, but when him telling me to stop crying only made me cry harder, he called mom in to deal with my emotions

[youngbeatricesugarman]

Bojack took his first steps today! I couldn't find my camera in time...

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

Aww🥺

[youngbeatricesugarman]

He's unstoppable now. I really have to keep him from walking into just about anything. Good thing my apartment doesn't have stairs...

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

Yep, good thing! I remember once when I was little, I thought I could use Blinky (my baby blanket) like a cape or a parachute or something, and fly down the stairs! Needless to say, it did not work. I bruised and scrapped my knee up pretty good

[youngbeatricesugarman]

Bojack took his first steps today! I couldn't find my camera in time...

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

Aww🥺

[therealbojack]

Hello all, Diane wrote another memoir. It's not about me this time but about my parents. Ugh. Anyway. American Nightmare, out now.

[butterscotchhorseman]

Am I getting compensated?

[therealbojack]

Aren't you dead? Can you go back to being dead now?

[butterscotchhorseman]

Nah I rather a stick round and watch you throw away the life i slaved so hard to give you you know bojack you really should be more grateful

[therealbojack]

I'm soooo grateful. You should ask Doctor Champ how grateful I am.

[butterscotchhorseman]

yeah right like im going to talk to some gayass lose besides im going to be too busy suing your cute little friend for soiling my good name she better hope she has a good lawyer

[drchamp2]

Hi, gayass loser here! You sound miserable there, pal. Seems like you could use somebody to talk to.

[butterscotchhorseman]

I'm not wasting my money to talk to some f.... loser

[drchamp2]

Now who said I was charging you? We're just talking here.

[butterscotchhorseman]

... fine let me tell you about my ungrateful son I put a roof over his head paid for his meals and all he did was blast the TV during my writing days or forced me.to pick him up from soccer but did he ever say thank you? No, cause he's an ungrateful shit just like his mother

[drchamp2]

He *forced* you to pick him up from soccer? How does a small child force a big man like yourself to do anything?

[butterscotchhorseman]

Hey! I did my fatherly duty to pick him up while his mom was being emotional is a little appreciation to much to ask?

[drchamp2]

How would you have liked him to show appreciation? I'm sure he's tried, and you either pushed him away or deemed his efforts 'not good enough.' I'll just say, I've heard some stories, and it seems like you've pretty harshly shut down any attempts he's made to connect with you from an early age. Why would he bother with someone who has hurt him time and time again?

You had *way* too many expectations of a young kid. Why is that?

[butterscotchhorseman]

... you trying to analyze me doc? It's not gonna work I'm to smart for you tricks

[drchamp2]

Tricks? There's no tricks. Just questions.

Are you too emotionally stunted to have an honest conversation? This is a safe space, you know.

[butterscotchhorseman]

Listen, I don't need some quack scolding me about my parenting skills, I was a great parent bojack was the problem all he did was whine and complain even now he wont stop yapping about how i screwed him over an gave him a trauma. what a joke real men don't have trauma

[drchamp2]

I'm not trying to scold you, man, I'm trying to understand, I- wait. 'Real men' don't have trauma? Okay, I'll bite. Define 'real men.'

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

Just ignore him, champ. He’s an idiot who refuses to ever be sensible and can’t be reasoned with. Don’t bother wasting your energy on him.

[drchamp2]

Hey, I'm trying my best here. Surely someone as nasty as him must be completely miserable.

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

He abused his son and wife. I don’t say this about many people, but he probably deserves to be miserable.

Good luck, though.

[drchamp2]

CJ, you fought in the war, right? That sounds like something a 'real man' might do. Would you consider yourself exempt from trauma?

I'm trying to prove a point to him.

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

Yes, I would say I have trauma. If me having trauma makes me not a “real” man, well… guess I must be a unicorn!

[therealbojack]

Hello all, Diane wrote another memoir. It's not about me this time but about my parents. Ugh. Anyway. American Nightmare, out now.

[butterscotchhorseman]

Am I getting compensated?

[therealbojack]

Aren't you dead? Can you go back to being dead now?

[butterscotchhorseman]

Nah I rather a stick round and watch you throw away the life i slaved so hard to give you you know bojack you really should be more grateful

[therealbojack]

I'm soooo grateful. You should ask Doctor Champ how grateful I am.

[butterscotchhorseman]

yeah right like im going to talk to some gayass lose besides im going to be too busy suing your cute little friend for soiling my good name she better hope she has a good lawyer

[drchamp2]

Hi, gayass loser here! You sound miserable there, pal. Seems like you could use somebody to talk to.

[butterscotchhorseman]

I'm not wasting my money to talk to some f.... loser

[drchamp2]

Now who said I was charging you? We're just talking here.

[butterscotchhorseman]

... fine let me tell you about my ungrateful son I put a roof over his head paid for his meals and all he did was blast the TV during my writing days or forced me.to pick him up from soccer but did he ever say thank you? No, cause he's an ungrateful shit just like his mother

[drchamp2]

He *forced* you to pick him up from soccer? How does a small child force a big man like yourself to do anything?

[butterscotchhorseman]

Hey! I did my fatherly duty to pick him up while his mom was being emotional is a little appreciation to much to ask?

[drchamp2]

How would you have liked him to show appreciation? I'm sure he's tried, and you either pushed him away or deemed his efforts 'not good enough.' I'll just say, I've heard some stories, and it seems like you've pretty harshly shut down any attempts he's made to connect with you from an early age. Why would he bother with someone who has hurt him time and time again?

You had *way* too many expectations of a young kid. Why is that?

[butterscotchhorseman]

... you trying to analyze me doc? It's not gonna work I'm to smart for you tricks

[drchamp2]

Tricks? There's no tricks. Just questions.

Are you too emotionally stunted to have an honest conversation? This is a safe space, you know.

[butterscotchhorseman]

Listen, I don't need some quack scolding me about my parenting skills, I was a great parent bojack was the problem all he did was whine and complain even now he wont stop yapping about how i screwed him over an gave him a trauma. what a joke real men don't have trauma

[drchamp2]

I'm not trying to scold you, man, I'm trying to understand, I- wait. 'Real men' don't have trauma? Okay, I'll bite. Define 'real men.'

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

Just ignore him, champ. He’s an idiot who refuses to ever be sensible and can’t be reasoned with. Don’t bother wasting your energy on him.

[drchamp2]

Hey, I'm trying my best here. Surely someone as nasty as him must be completely miserable.

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

He abused his son and wife. I don’t say this about many people, but he probably deserves to be miserable.

Good luck, though.

[therealbojack]

Hello all, Diane wrote another memoir. It's not about me this time but about my parents. Ugh. Anyway. American Nightmare, out now.

[butterscotchhorseman]

Am I getting compensated?

[therealbojack]

Aren't you dead? Can you go back to being dead now?

[butterscotchhorseman]

Nah I rather a stick round and watch you throw away the life i slaved so hard to give you you know bojack you really should be more grateful

[therealbojack]

I'm soooo grateful. You should ask Doctor Champ how grateful I am.

[butterscotchhorseman]

yeah right like im going to talk to some gayass lose besides im going to be too busy suing your cute little friend for soiling my good name she better hope she has a good lawyer

[drchamp2]

Hi, gayass loser here! You sound miserable there, pal. Seems like you could use somebody to talk to.

[butterscotchhorseman]

I'm not wasting my money to talk to some f.... loser

[drchamp2]

Now who said I was charging you? We're just talking here.

[butterscotchhorseman]

... fine let me tell you about my ungrateful son I put a roof over his head paid for his meals and all he did was blast the TV during my writing days or forced me.to pick him up from soccer but did he ever say thank you? No, cause he's an ungrateful shit just like his mother

[drchamp2]

He *forced* you to pick him up from soccer? How does a small child force a big man like yourself to do anything?

[butterscotchhorseman]

Hey! I did my fatherly duty to pick him up while his mom was being emotional is a little appreciation to much to ask?

[drchamp2]

How would you have liked him to show appreciation? I'm sure he's tried, and you either pushed him away or deemed his efforts 'not good enough.' I'll just say, I've heard some stories, and it seems like you've pretty harshly shut down any attempts he's made to connect with you from an early age. Why would he bother with someone who has hurt him time and time again?

You had *way* too many expectations of a young kid. Why is that?

[butterscotchhorseman]

... you trying to analyze me doc? It's not gonna work I'm to smart for you tricks

[drchamp2]

Tricks? There's no tricks. Just questions.

Are you too emotionally stunted to have an honest conversation? This is a safe space, you know.

[butterscotchhorseman]

Listen, I don't need some quack scolding me about my parenting skills, I was a great parent bojack was the problem all he did was whine and complain even now he wont stop yapping about how i screwed him over an gave him a trauma. what a joke real men don't have trauma

[drchamp2]

I'm not trying to scold you, man, I'm trying to understand, I- wait. 'Real men' don't have trauma? Okay, I'll bite. Define 'real men.'

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

Just ignore him, champ. He’s an idiot who refuses to ever be sensible and can’t be reasoned with. Don’t bother wasting your energy on him.

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

@drchamp

Hey buddy, how ya been? :)

[drchamp2]

I'm alright, trying to deal with your brother in law in some capacity. You know how that goes. How are you?

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

You’re a saint for dealing with him, every word out of his mouth makes me want to punch him.

As for how I’ve been… alright! Just the usual, dealing with annoying CEO crap, having terrible nightmares, and… being a father😄

Fatherhood is so great, makes everything else bearable… that and my friends, of course! I think I’ll visit Sal soon… :)

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

@drchamp

Hey buddy, how ya been? :)

[therealbojack]

Hello all, Diane wrote another memoir. It's not about me this time but about my parents. Ugh. Anyway. American Nightmare, out now.

[butterscotchhorseman]

Am I getting compensated?

[therealbojack]

Aren't you dead? Can you go back to being dead now?

[butterscotchhorseman]

Nah I rather a stick round and watch you throw away the life i slaved so hard to give you you know bojack you really should be more grateful

[therealbojack]

I'm soooo grateful. You should ask Doctor Champ how grateful I am.

[butterscotchhorseman]

yeah right like im going to talk to some gayass lose besides im going to be too busy suing your cute little friend for soiling my good name she better hope she has a good lawyer

[drchamp2]

Hi, gayass loser here! You sound miserable there, pal. Seems like you could use somebody to talk to.

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

Personally, I think butterscotch should go die in a hole ☺️

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

@bojackhorsemanobviously

Hey buddy! Hope you’ve been taking care of yourself :)

[bojackhorsemanobviously]

well I've been sober for the past week , so that's something..

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

That’s amazing!😊

I’m so proud of you, pal!

[bojackhorsemanobviously]

Thanks uncle, but i still got the rest of the month left its gonna be hard

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

You can do it! I believe in you :)

[bojackhorsemanobviously]

...

Why??

[declared-dead-crackerjack]

Well…why not!