he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Claire Keane
#extradirty
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@deepvend
about me val, 21, she/her. i come on here to live blog hockey games, complain about formula one and write stuff every now and then ✧.*
my favourite teams are the boston bruins (nhl) + scuderia ferrari (f1), but i like players/drivers from other teams so you can expect to see me mention any of them for both sports :)
✎ my inbox is always open, whether you want to talk or have questions, requests or suggestions!
MASTERLIST ✧ 300 PROMPTS ✧ 100 CELLY
Helloooo angelll. Love your will smut so much!!! I was wondering if I could put in a smut request. Basically the premise is that the reader is busty. Her and macklin are friends but not in a relationship as of yet. For a party or smth reader wears one of those milkmaid dresses and Mack just loses his mind. Dirty talk and dom Mack if possible 🩷
𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬
pairing: macklin x reader
wc: 1.5k
song of the fic: dress - taylor swift
warnings: smut 18+ unprotected sex, piv, rough sexual content
18+ content below the cut, mdni please!
the second you enter tyler and cat’s place, music and laughter fills your ears. you reach down to adjust the neckline of your dress one more time. the fabric hugs your chest perfectly, pushing your tits up.
you spot macklin across the room right away, leaning against the counter beside will, drink in hand. his eyes lock onto you the second you appear and they don’t move.
before you could make your way towards him cat interrupts, pulling you in for a hug. “you made it! i’m so glad you’re here.” she grins, pulling back and giving you a small smirk when she takes in the outfit.
“nice going on the dress, you’ve got to lend it to me sometime.” she teases.
you laugh, cheeks going slightly pink at her words before nodding. “my closet is also yours cat— you already know that.”
cat links her arms with yours, pulling you towards the living room. you glance back one more time towards macklin who was already looking right back at you. you give a small smile and turn your head back around to pay attention to whatever cat was rambling on about.
on the other side of the room, macklin was completely losing his mind. seeing you walk in that dress hugging your curves perfectly he can’t help but feel the heat growing in his pants.
he watches as you tilt your head back and laugh at whatever cat was saying. his eyes constantly switching in between staring at your face to your chest.
will beside him catches the way macklin completely zoned out in every conversation they were having as soon as you walked in and smirks to himself knowing his best friend was practically obsessed.
“dude— could you want her more?”
“what?”
that snaps macklin out of his staring trance just for a second, eyes scanning wills face to see the teasing glance as he takes another sip from his beer.
“she’s not even been here for like five minutes and you’re already watching her like a creep. at least try to be subtle.”
macklin mutters something under his breath but his gaze stays fixed back on you. you feel the weight of it even from across the room. you grab a drink and start making your way toward them, pretending not to notice how his eyes keep dropping to your chest. when you reach them, will grins at you.
“took you long enough.” he jokes, pulling you into a hug before grabbing your seltzer and taking a sip. you gasp; swatting his shoulder. “get your own.”
will chuckles, taking another sip before handing it back to you. “mack was just saying how much he likes your dress.”
macklin shoots him a glare but his attention snaps straight back to you as he smiles sheepishly. his eyes flick down again, tracing the swell of your tits before he forces them back up. you catch the look and feel a spark of satisfaction yet nervousness.
on purpose, you cross your arms under your chest and push upward, making your boobs press up even more against the fabric. macklin lets out a shaky exhale, trying to brush it off by taking a sip out of his drink but that’s what did it for him.
the conversation drifts between you three, but every time macklin speaks his eyes betray him. they drop when you lean forward to set your drink down. will keeps teasing him quietly but macklin barely reacts anymore.
you quietly excuse yourself from the conversation, heading back to cat and chatting her up before going up to use the washroom. you reapply your gloss and reach for the door to be met with macklin, flinching not expecting anyone to be there.
“gosh mack— you scared me.” you say, clutching your chest causing him to grin. “sorry, didn’t mean to startle you.”
his gaze once again flickers towards your chest and this time you can’t help but smirk.
“take a picture— it’ll last you longer.”
macklin laughs, shaking his head before poking his cheek with this tongue.
“alright, you caught me but come on now, you look absolutely gorgeous.”
you try not to react but his words make you feel absolutely giddy on the inside. you reach down and adjust the top slightly before running your fingers down the fabric to smooth it down.
“i think i did pretty good with my dress.”
“oh, 100 fucking percent.”
his hands slide up your sides, thumbs brushing the undersides of your breasts through the dress. the air feels thick between you. “been watching you all night, y/n. please tell me you’re feeling something here too.”
you bite your lip, the feeling of his fingers against the side of your hips bring heat in between your thighs. “mack.”
“every time you crossed your arms like that, pushing these out just to watch me lose it. you knew exactly what you were doing.”
you gasp slightly, his fingers moving from your side to brush softly against the fabric clinging to your chest.
you feel your pulse quicken as he keeps talking. “i can’t just be your friend anymore. when i look at you, i get these thoughts no friend should be getting.”
you shut him up by slamming your lips against his. he’s taken back just for a second but quickly retaliates, pulling you flush against him. the kiss is messy and heated, full on tension and unspoken words. his fingers reach down towards the back of your dress to pull the zipper down.
you pull away, resting your forehead against his. “mack— someone will see.”
“come with me.”
you don’t hesitate. he steers you down the hallway into the guest bedroom and the door clicks shut behind you. his lips are against yours again, straight to business as his fingers drag up your back to slowly undo the zipper of your dress.
the fabric slips around your shoulders before dropping at your hips, macklins eyes lock on your bare chest, his hands coming up to cups them both, squeezing hard, thumbs rubbing over your nipples. “fuck, look at these you’re so perfect.”
he leans down and sucks one nipple into his mouth, tongue flicking and teeth grazing just enough to make you gasp. his hand works the other, pinching and rolling while he switches between them, leaving both wet and aching. you arch into his mouth, fingers threading into his hair.
“mack.” you whine.
“shh baby,” he says against your skin, pushing you back onto the bed. macklin drops to his knees between your thighs and pulls the dress down. his fingers hook into your panties, tossing them aside.
his fingers slide through your folds, spreading your slick before pushing inside you. he pumps them slowly, curling just right, thumb circling your clit. “so fucking wet already? i’ve barely done anything yet.”
you moan and rock against his hand. he pulls his fingers out licking them clean as you make a sound of discontent. “mack— i was so close.” you whine, jutting your hips up.
he smirks before standing up shoving his jeans down. “i know but i’d rather be inside you when i make you cum.”
macklin strokes himself once then climbs over you, lining up and pushing in slow so you feel every inch stretching you open. your walls clench around him and he groans, resting his forehead against yours. “god, you feel so perfect. been waiting to fuck you since you showed up in that dress.”
he starts thrusting, hips snapping forward in a steady rhythm that makes your tits bounce with every movement. his eyes stay locked on them. “look at these fucking tits bouncing while i fuck you.”
his pace picks up, harder and deeper. one hand grips your hip while the other reaches up to squeeze your tit, pinching the nipple again. “you’re mine now, no more just friends bullshit. say it y/n.”
“i’m yours,” you gasp, legs wrapping around his waist as he riles in deeper causing you to squeal against him as he keeps hitting that same spongey spot inside of you that has you seeing stars.
“louder, baby c’mon please.”
“i’m yours, mack.”
“that’s my fucking girl.”
he fucks you faster, the wet sound of skin on skin filling the room. his hand slips between you to rub your clit, pushing you right to the edge. “cum for me, i know you’re close.”
your orgasm crashes through you, walls pulsing around him as you moan his name. macklin keeps going, hips stuttering as he buries himself deep and releases inside you with a groan.
he stays there for a moment, breathing heavy, then pulls out slow watching his cum leaks out of you with a satisfied smirk.
he helps you sit up and helps you get back into the dress and zip it up, straightening down the fabric. “we’re not done,” he murmurs. “after the party you’re coming home with me, and this dress stays on until i tell you to take it off.”
he kisses you hard, then opens the door. the party noise rushes back in as you walk out together, his hand possessive on your lower back. every step reminds you of the ache between your legs and the mess still inside you, and every time you catch his eye he looks ready for round two.
Being an adult will have you unironically craving a vegetable
do we want the next schaef x babysitter to have some smut or nah
YESS
NOO just fluff!!
no but make it a lil suggestive
the stairs mishap - ethan edwards
request: “Ethan Edwards x reader where it’s like frenemies to lovers / secret relationship and the team is trynna figure out who Ethan’s been seeing for a while until they find reader sneaking out of his room” warnings: swearing, ethan and reader being assholes to each other, alcohol consumption, a slightly suggestive scene wc: 2.8k note: guys… this request is from november… the slump has been REAL. hope anon is still around to enjoy this 🙏🏻 i had originally planned for this to be a lil blurb but then i kept adding onto the backstory and now we’re here!
you had already had a long day when you showed up to the party. party that you had never even wanted to attend, but had been dragged to by your best friend, who had insisted on you going and meeting her new boyfriend. you didn’t know whose house you were at, you didn’t know who the hell were all those sweaty, drunk people around you, you couldn't even remember her boyfriend's name. nate? noah? there was an N there, that was sure.
it wasn’t a justification, but your mind was complete mush by the time you sat down onto the stone steps outside of the townhouse, sinking into your own misery instead of kicking it away. you tried to shut out the sounds of irresponsible young adults basically vandalizing the front yard with their red solo cups.
the assignment you’d spent days over had turned out to be a big mess, a customer had made it his life mission to get you fired mere hours before, your favourite lip liner had slipped out of your pocket and into a drain as you crossed the road to get where you were sitting.
it wasn’t the end of the world, you were aware of that, but all those little things that had gone wrong in merely half a day had pissed you off, and sitting alone rethinking about them wasn’t helping. you felt on edge, heart and head both pounding as you your blood boiled through your veins. you thought you were about to catch fire.
so, when you felt someone’s leg nudge your arm as they walked down the stairs, hot white anger flashed behind your eyes.
“watch where the fuck you’re going, dumbass.” you snapped, feeling your patience trip over itself in the meantime.
“who pissed in your cereal? you could try and be a little nicer.”
you looked up at who had just become the cherry on top of your godawful day. the incriminated person was a guy who must have been about your age, with round metal glasses and flowy hair messily tucked behind his ears. you would’ve paid more attention to his great looks, had he not nearly just stepped on your hand and then not apologized for it.
“why would i need to be nice? you were walking on me!”
“well, who the fuck sits in front of the door anyways? you shouldn’t be here!”
if you gave it a thought, you would have seen that he wasn't exactly making a bad point. your foggy brain wasn’t exactly in the right emotional state to fully comprehend it, though, so you simply stood up and walked away, not without raising your middle finger towards him first.
you went back inside, where the sound of the worst music known to mankind and the smell of vodka would for sure be giving you a headache in no time. you mentally cursed at the guy you’d just argued with once again, mainly for taking that fresh, quieter spot away from you. then, for being so goddamn cute. what a waste of good looks.
after spending nearly an hour trying not to think about it, scrolling on your phone like you weren’t surrounded by people in every direction, your friend’s voice reached your ears before she could get into your sight.
“here you are! come meet nico’s friends, c’mon.”
nico. you knew there was an N somewhere.
she seemed so enthusiastic about it that you felt bad about being so negative about everything. you refrained from rolling your eyes and stood up without a word, following her like a puppy, or a child who’d gotten lost in a mall.
you had forgotten all about nico and his friends who, going off the hockey player stereotype, were not about to make your head hurt and your anger boil any less. still, you looked at your best friend standing there, smiling wide and with a hand extended to you and you thought that you owed her this one thing at least. you grabbed her hand and you walked across the crowd, trying and successfully managing to avoid getting drinks spilled all over yourselves.
your eyes fell on her boyfriend immediately, despite having never met before: his smile was the widest, and his gaze hadn't left her since she'd reappeared in his orbit. it was almost a breath of fresh air to see a man so kind-looking, after the exchange you'd just had.
a couple of introductions later, while you were talking about schools and jobs with your new acquaintances, you were far too involved into the conversation to pick up the sound of steps approaching you, stopping right behind you.
you did, however, pick up the low whistle that followed and, after turning around on your feet, you were met with what was possibly the worst case scenario: those same glasses, that same smug face, the same teasing tone dripping from his words.
“what a nice friend you got here.” he scoffed, looking at the girl by your side.
“oh, so not only are you an idiot who walks onto people, you’re also fucking annoying.”
“would you stop saying that like i did it on purpose? it was an accident, for god’s sake.”
everyone in your vicinity looked between the two of you, with concerned or amused expression. nico’s brows furrowed violently. “what the fuck did you even do to her, ethan?”
that question was single-handedly able to bring out all the wrath you had somewhat managed to keep under control. you attempted to explain both of your sides of the story, not without some barking and grumbling from ethan as you mentioned how he'd blamed you for his own carelessness.
then, when you mentioned how he had not even bothered to apologize to you, he scoffed. “that’s what this is about? then i’m sorry, okay?”
“no, i don’t want your apology now.”
“make up your mind before making it everyone’s problem, next time.”
your brows raised with incredulity, and so did your hands. “okay, i’m going home. have a good night everyone.”
“where are you going? you came with me in my car.”
“i’ll get a taxi.” you muttered under your breath, before your eyes met ethan’s bloodshot ones again. “hell, i’ll walk home if i need to.”
both you and ethan had been subjected to a level of forced proximity that you wouldn’t have wished upon your worst enemy, somehow ending up in the same place at least once a day. the city was small, and so was your now-merged group.
you couldn’t exactly pinpoint a precise moment, but something within you had shifted; sometime among those constant hangouts, the irritation that burned down into your stomach at the sight of him had changed, turning into something you couldn’t quite find the words to explain.
you watched the way ethan acted towards everyone else that wasn’t you: he was charming, always smiling around and cracking jokes out of nowhere. even the way he spoke, tone always regulated and voice warm, nearly made you forget about your absolute vile previous interactions.
a part of you wanted to reach out and slap him in the face each time your paths crossed, the other part wondered what it would be like to bury the hatchet, for once.
it was a constant game of pulling and pushing, with him: sometimes you’d catch his eyes staring at you from across the room and he’d quickly look away, nearly embarrassed. then, when the two of you ended up on the same team during a game, he’d make it his life mission to annoy you even further than his presence had already managed to do.
almost feeling like he was doing it on purpose to make you go completely crazy, you couldn’t stop thinking about it. about him. about how stupid he looked in his glasses, how horrible the way his hair fell over his forehead when his body shook from laughing was, and other lies you convinced yourself of.
that constant instability, that chase that was still too out of reach to call it what it was, led to you at another party in that very same front patio, possibly a little over tipsy but a little less than full-on drunk, throwing your arms around his neck and pressing your lips to his. you could faintly remember the bitter taste of liquor and the mint from his chewing gum mixing into what tasted, quite frankly, like hell.
ethan didn’t question it, he didn’t fight back, he just went with it. when you pulled away, suddenly feeling levelheaded again, you realized what had just happened. you were about to scream at him, tell him that you hated him and couldn’t kiss him, when a sultry smirk appeared on his lips.
“i knew that, deep down, you liked me too.”
“too?” you asked, eyes impossibly wide and mouth slightly agape in confusion.
before you could add anything else, his palms grabbed the sides of your face and he pulled you in, lips pressing onto yours with much more calmness than before. he was almost… tender, which wasn’t quite right.
he pulled away, looked deep into your eyes with an intensity that made your insides turn, then nodded towards his car. “c’mon, i’m taking you home.”
you went to bed that night, mind completely blown after every single thing you thought you’d known about ethan and how you felt for him had been shattered.
when you saw each other, two days later, you both acted like nothing had happened, like you’d actually agreed to it beforehand; you escaped from the other, made minimal eye contact and nearly flinched at the mention of the other’s name.
you thought that’d be enough to get back to what you were, two people hating each other, but you still ended up in the backseat of his car that night. then he cornered you in the hallway, as you got out of the bathroom. then, before you knew it, you were in his bed, sheets bunched up around your sweaty bodies as your breathing returned to its normal pace.
you had managed to turn the entire situation around without ever talking about what had happened between you two, or what was going to happen. all you knew was that you liked each other, but you also hated each other.
but then again, sneaking around at any given chance to prevent your friends from seeing the two of you together was probably your own way of burying the hatchet.
and slowly, frowns and freezing glares turned into silent checkups and faint smiles.
after a night out, you went back to his apartment like you always did. nothing unusual had happened, it was just the two of you sprawled out on his couch, with a movie on tv neither of you was paying attention to as your limbs were all twisted in each other’s.
between a hungry kiss and a tight embrace, ethan cleared his throat. “why were we even like that, when we met?”
“i don’t want to justify myself, but i’d had a pretty shitty day.” you shrugged, under his inquisitive gaze.
“yeah, same.”
and you went on to tell him in detail about how unreasonably cruel your professor had been about your efforts, how working in the service industry always seemed to mean you got to meet the stupidest, most entitled people on earth, how every little thing that had happened to you that day had seemed like a plan to break you down.
ethan’s fingers lightly trailed along your thigh, pulling you into him as he described what had been the worst game he’d played that season, right before attending that party where he’d met you. unfinished passes, giveaways that had put the opposite team in great spots and some more details that had built up all the anger in the pit of his stomach.
you sighed, breathing in his scent that had grown to be so familiar to your nostrils, ear pressed against his heart and listening to its steady beating. “yeah, well, you were right. i probably shouldn’t have been sitting on the stairs.”
he chuckled, sound vibrating in his chest. “i mean, seeing how that ended up, i’d say i’m glad you were.”
ethan had never really been the distracted, unmindful, fashionably-late type of person. his schedule was tight, strics, bringing him to the arena hours before games, indulging in very meticulous pre-game rituals.
yet, as weeks passed, something changed. all his teammates noticed how his arrival times started getting much closer to the actual game times, how he always looked distracted, how he kept checking his hpone in the locker room, texting back franctically. they had no doubt, there was someone.
what they didn't know was that the someone in question was none other than you, the one who had barely refrained herself from assaulting him the first time you'd met. they didn't know that, each time he didn't go out with them to get drinks post-games, he was heading to your apartment instead. they didn't know that each text he typed between tying skates was directed to you.
you were all ethan could think about, day and night, everyday like the most heavenly loop. that must've been why, when you got off your shift and asked if you could come over, he said yes without giving him a second thought.
his mind had gone completely blank from the moment he'd opened the door and seen you standing there, until he found himself laying down on the bed with you straddling him, thighs on either side of his hips, his hands gliding smoothly up and down your body. he leaned in just enough for his lips to meet yours halfway, in a wet, smacking kiss.
then, with your lips still hovering over his, fingers tracing over his light stubble, you brough him out of his trance. "didn't you have practice, today?"
his eyes widened impossibly and, before you could blink, he was up and running around, grabbing something to wear and shoving his equipment back in his bag. you sat at the edge of the bed, body trembling as you doubled over in laughter.
"don't laugh!" he groaned, sly smirk tugging at his lips in the meantime. "are you ready? i'll give you a ride home."
"yeah, just give me a second to go to the bathroom."
"i'll go start the car." he said, before you disappeared behind the door with a thumbs up.
when he sneakily slipped out of his bedroom and into the long, carpeted hallway, he was immediately welcomed by the sight of three dark shadows. nico, seamus and shane stood there, right in front of his door. crap, he thought to himself, as his brain cartwheeled to try and come up with an excuse to make them leave instantly, before they could catch you.
“we were wondering why you kept being late, ditching us so often and so on, so we came here about five minutes ago to try and get some information out of you.” nico started off carefully, words feeling heavy and calculating as they left his mouth. “we were about to knock, but then we found out for ourselves.”
“…what are you talking about?”
“you think we’re dumb?”
“or blind.”
“or deaf. these walls are pretty thin.” shane pointed at the weak, cheap plasterboard.
before ethan could reply, pretending not to know what the boys were referring to, his bedroom door swung open. you stepped out, hair still messy and shirt on backwards. your gaze raised when you felt a large number of eyes stare at you impatiently, quickly realizing that both you and ethan were basically screwed.
“…hi guys.”
“you were about to miss the game because you were too busy having sex?” the older boy whisper-yelled, eyes darting back and forth between the two of you.
“hey, we weren’t having sex.” ethan rectified, brows tightening together.
“yeah, just… making out.”
“how did this happen? i mean, you hate each other.” nico asked, looking between you two much like that very first night, at the party.
“yeah, not anymore, i guess.”
the three boys exchanged a look, before their gazes returned fixated on you and ethan standing there still, after being caught red-handed. the eldest shook his head, turning around towards the elevator. "we'll talk about it later tonight."
your ears picked up a barely audible scoffing sound coming from ethan next to you and, by the time you looked over your shoulder and the elevator door closed in front of the appalled expressions of his teammates, he burst out laughing.
you chuckled as well, feeling heat rising in your cheeks as you thought about what on earth had just happened. he dried a tear that had slipped out of the corner of his eye, before he could return his full attention to you.
"we're going to have a rather eventful night, aren't we?"
"yeah, of that i'm sure."
this is the funniest sequence of photos i've ever seen
would you ever consider writing for ivar stenberg?
-🐇
sureee, i don’t really know much about him so you’re gonna have to give me some inspo here eheh
saw this on my tl and felt it was too cute to keep to myself 😭
per @/leafslesbian on twt
Somewhere Between Here and Home | W.Smith²
CHAPTER TWO || SERIES MASTERLIST
synopsis: the one where y/n meets will smith for the first time
pairing: will smith x reader
wc: 3.5k
music playlist
you hated flying. not because you were scared of it, you’ve flown enough times in your life that the actual plane part didn’t bother you anymore. it was everything that came with it that you despised.
the waiting and sitting still, the inability to distract yourself no matter how hard you tried. the literal fact that you were thousands of feet in the air with absolutely nothing to do except sit with your own thoughts which unfortunately for you, were currently running a mile a minute.
your fingers tapped lightly against the armrest as you stared out the window at the view of endless clouds which normally you thought was beautiful but today it just reminded you how far away from home you were.
you look down at your phone again to the email that was still open. you knew every single word at this point. you knew the date of your meeting, the time, the building, the names of the advisors you would be speaking with.
you knew everything.
and yet somehow your brain kept convincing you that maybe if you reread it enough times, you’d find something you missed that would make you feel more prepared.
something that could possibly stop the nerves from crawling up your chest. you’re constantly trying to tell yourself it’s fine, that everything will be okay.
except your mind really doesn’t believe that it’s fine.
five years ago, this was exactly where you wanted to be. you remembered being eighteen and sitting in your bedroom, mapping out your entire future like you had some kind of guarantee that everything would work out exactly the way you planned.
you thought the hardest part would be getting here. the degree and applications and the endless nights where you questioned if you were actually good enough.
you had done all of that and gotten through it but now that the opportunity was finally sitting right in front of you, all you could think about was everything that could go wrong which makes you feel upset with yourself.
because you’ve spent years preparing for this. you knew you were qualified and you knew you deserved to be there but knowing something and actually believing it were two completely different things.
your stomach twists with anxiety and then because apparently your brain needed something else to stress about, you remembered you were staying at will’s place.
somehow that still felt nerve racking. you had no problem staying with grace. grace has been your best friend since you were kids.
you’ve slept over at the smith house more times than you could count. you’ve had dinners there, helping colleen and bill set up the plates and get the food out on the table and even spent weekends there whenever your schedule cleared up with school and work.
that house felt familiar.
but will?
will was different because he had always just been there but never actually there.
you knew of him and about him. you knew every accomplishment because grace would tell you about her younger brother with so much pride.
you were aware of how hard he worked and how much he loved hockey and how seriously he took everything. you and will had somehow spent years existing in the same circle without ever actually meeting and now you were going to be sleeping under the same roof as him for over a week.
you covered your face with your hands, huffing to yourself.
why did grace have to be so good at convincing people?
-
when the plane lands, you felt like you could finally breathe again.
well, kinda.
now the nerves had shifted. before it was the flight, now it was everything else.
you grabbed your suitcase from baggage claim and start scanning the crowd. you didn’t even have to look for long because you hear her before you see her.
“y/n!”
you barely had time to turn around before grace was wrapping her arms around you pulling you into a tight hug.
“hi to you too.”
she pulls away, grin resting on her face. “i missed you.”
“we just talked yesterday.” you tease, shaking your head to which she rolls her eyes.
“yeah but over the phone. just say you missed me too.”
“yeah yeah, i missed you too grace.”
and just like that, some of the tension in your shoulders ease because that was grace. she could make everything feel normal.
behind her stood colleen and bill. the moment you walked over, colleen pulled you into a hug.
“it’s been too long y/n! how was the flight?”
“it was good.”
she pulls away, giving you a small squeeze before letting bill pull you into a hug.
“did you at least get some sleep?”
you smile sheepishly which was more than enough of an answer for the both of them.
“y/n— you need to rest up!”
“i know, i will tonight.”
“you better.”
you huff, brushing your hair out of your face turning to look at grace who just shrugs in response. bill and colleen have always treated you like a third child hence why you’re always getting the stern parent talk even when yours aren’t around.
bill smiles, reaching down to grab your suitcase from you.
“ready to go?”
you nod but then the realization of where you were getting ready to go to hits you.
will’s place.
“wait.”
you pause, swallowing quickly to get rid of the nerves. “are you— are you sure this is okay?”
colleen sighs, shaking her head at the words that leave your mouth.
“y/n, honey we’ve talked about this countless times before you even got onto your flight. it’s more than okay.”
“i know but—”
“no buts.”
“i just don’t want to be in the way.”
bill stares at you in disbelief, “you’re not in the way.”
“but you’re here for will.”
“you’re also family too y/n; you always have been.”
you open your mouth to retaliate but quickly shut it once you see colleen give you that classic mom glare to which she nods in contentment when she notices it still do its charm back from yours and graces teenage years.
“now let’s go.”
the drive was beautiful, that was the first thing you noticed. you have never been to san jose before and everything looked different from home.
the streets and buildings and the weather, everything felt unfamiliar and new which was exciting yet terrifying all at once knowing that this could be the city that you’ll be living in if it all works out in your favour.
you sit in the backseat beside grace while she talked about random things. mostly stuff that had happened at home to which you tried listening to but your mind kept wandering.
what would will be like?
would it be awkward?
would he think you were some annoying chick intruding?
would he regret saying yes?
your fingers twisting nervously at the rings until grace places a hand on top of yours to stop the fidgeting. you look up at her as she gives you a sweet comforting smile, squeezing your hand tight.
“you’re okay.” she reassures, voice firm in a way where you can tell she’s trying to make any doubt in your mind disappear.
when you all eventually pull up outside will’s apartment, your heart starts hammering against your chest which was crazy work because he’s literally just a fucking boy.
you’ve dealt with way more countless stressful interviews and presentations during university for your program but somehow walking up to meet someone you’ve technically known about for years felt oddly more worse.
he’s already standing outside, a hat sitting backwards on his head. his blonde hair which peaked out from underneath looked longer than the last time you saw it in a picture grace sent a couple of months ago. his hands shoved in the pocket of his sweatpants.
everyone’s quick to climb out of the car and walk over to will, sharing hugs as you quietly trudge behind watching from a distance. you watch colleen place a kiss against his cheek to which he grins mumbling a quick ‘mom’ as he makes eye contact with you, cheeks turning a light shade of pink realizing you probably caught the interaction.
“hi, y/n right?”
“yeah.”
he smiles, nodding his head. “i’m will.”
you let out a small laugh, “i know.”
the second the words leave your mouth, your eyes widen. that probably sounded so bitchy.
“i mean— not like that. like, i know that you’re will because yeah.”
oh my god.
stop fucking talking.
you’re so fucking embarrassing.
will laughs watching you with an amused expression, “yeah, i know what you meant.”
your face felt like its on fire, not even five minutes into meeting the guy and you already can’t speak and possibly sounded like a bitch.
nice going y/n.
“thanks for letting me stay, i really appreciate it.”
“yeah, of course.”
“and i’m sorry.”
you watch as wills eyebrows scrunch up in confusion, “for what?”
“for invading your space.”
realization scatters on his face as he smiles, shaking his head.
“you know, grace warned me about this. but hey— i mean it. you’re not bothering me.”
once you hear it from him, you feel the tension ease down a bit. before you can say anything else, will reaches down and grabs your suitcase.
“i’ll show you to your room.”
you nod as you trail behind him. he leads you to a room down at the end of the hallway. the room was perfect, minimalistic but still comforting in a way which felt like home.
“hope this is okay.”
you smile, “more than okay. thank you, again will.”
he gives you a soft smile, leaning against the side of the door arms crossed and for a split second you felt your face heat up at the way he was looking at you but you brush it off blaming the nerves.
“of course, i’ll let you settle in.”
and with that he slightly shuts the door behind him before heading back to the rest of the family.
-
you’ve barely unpacked your suitcase when grace knocks on the door, not waiting for a response before bursting in and launching herself on the bed next to you.
“soooo.”
you look up at her, confused but knowing her tone it was going to probably be some stupid teasing comment.
“so what?”
“thoughts?”
“thoughts on what?”
“my brother, duh.” she says like it’s the most obvious question.
you squint your eyes at her, trying to figure out what she’s implying at. sometimes the words that leave her mouth have different kinds of interpretation if you don’t know her well enough.
“what about him?”
“i told you he’d be nice, you were out there stirring up a whole storm for no reason.”
you grab the nearest pillow and chuck it at her, shaking your head biting back a smile.
“leave me alone.”
grace squeals, reaching up to pat down her hair before focussing her attention towards your suitcase. “any goods in there?”
you raise your eyebrow in confusion, “goods?”
she sighs, “you’re really slow today aren’t you?”
you gasp, swatting her shoulder as she giggles reaching in your suitcase at your folded clothes. “anyways— i was talking about some sexy tops. you’re in san jose for crying out loud. did you really think all you’re going to do for a week is focus on this interview for all seven days?”
you shrug as she reaches in pulling out a low cut burgundy top, smirking slightly before winking at you. “now that’s what i’m talking about. if you got em, flaunt them.”
you laugh, rolling your eyes at your friend before pulling the rest of the stuff from your suitcase as grace begins to help you. it was moments like this that brought even the slightest amount of relaxation to this the entire trip.
the bickering, the jokes back and forth, just being face to face with your best friend rather than seeing her from a phone screen. it made everything seem like it would be okay— even if it was for those few minutes you spent missing the moment while it was happening right in front of you.
“mom and dad want everyone ready by six, by the way.”
you hum, tilting your head in confusion. “for?”
“family dinner.”
family.
before you could overthink anything, grace catches the look on your face giving you the same stern glance that colleen gave you earlier back at the airport.
“you’ve always been family, y/n. don’t forget that now.”
grace and colleen always had a way with their words, making it always seem so convincing that it hits you right at the heart strings. makes you forget why you were even overthinking it in the first place.
“now get dressed, take a shower because yikes— you really need it.”
your jaw drops open in shock. “grace, get out.”
she laughs loudly, snickering as she shoots up from the bed and makes a beeline towards the door before you had the chance to chuck the pillow in her direction again.
-
by the time you were showered and changed and at the restaurant you were drained and starving.
you sat between grace and colleen, directly across from will which you were very hyper aware about in the moment but then he seemed to be surprising you more and more as the dinner went on.
you expected him to be on his phone for most of the dinner, aimlessly scrolling through hockey reels or texting his friends but instead his phone stayed locked beside him as he engaged with everyone at the table.
any time that anyone spoke at the table, his gaze would immediately follow and his entire attention would shift towards them. he asked questions and remembered the little details and followed up on stories.
you weren’t exactly sure why that surprised you. maybe it was because you spent years seeing him as this supposed basic hockey player in your head. an athlete everyone was proud of and him knowing that and being completely cocky about it and never thought about anything else besides that, but you were so wrong.
he genuinely cared and that stood out to you more than anything else.
you listen to all the different conversations happening around you, your gaze subconsciously drifting towards will without you realizing a couple of times.
“what about you, y/n?”
your head snaps up at that because you knew exactly where this conversation was about to go.
oh no.
“the scholarship interview.”
you force a smile, “what about it?”
bill grins at you from the across the table. “are you excited about it?”
your stomach twists, it was as if all the nerves you tried to leave behind back at home all followed you right away and wrapped themselves tightly around you.
“yeah, there’s not much to talk about though.”
you reach for the ring on your finger, twisting it around nervously.
“that’s not true.”
“it kinda is.”
“cmon now kiddo,”
you let out a soft nervous chuckle, shaking your head. “it’s just a meeting.”
grace snorts beside you, “y/n, you’ve been stressing about this for months.”
“thank you for exposing me.”
“you’re very welcome.”
you force another laugh, hoping nobody is nothing the knot that is forming in your stomach. the twisting of the ring on your finger gets faster.
“you’ll do amazing honey.” colleen coos from beside you, squeezing your leg as reassurance.
that’s what people expected. people expected you to do amazing.
you fingers kept twisting the ring in circles, you probably lost count of how many times it’s probably made laps around your finger.
that’s when you felt it, someone looking at you.
you lift your head up, your eyes locking with wills from across the table. his gaze drops briefly towards your hands then back up. he doesn’t say anything, doesn’t call attention to it.
instead, will gives you a small nod. almost like his way of saying ‘hey, it’s okay just breathe’ and something about that made you stop, your fingers stilled and his expression softens before he smiles at you.
-
the traffic on the way back home was bad. grace climbed into the back seat first and you followed behind and then will which left you sandwiched in between both siblings.
you buckled yourself in, trying not to take up extra space and feel awkward as you feel wills thigh press slightly up against yours.
grace talked enough for the the three of you to which you contributed occasionally. you mostly just stared out the window, admiring the view until exhaustion finally caught up to you.
your eyes felt heavy, you barely slept the flight and the night before due to all of the stress and anxiety. you blink trying to keep yourself awake for the rest of the ride home but sooner than you know it, the blinks get slower and then you fall asleep.
“right y/n?”
graces questions fall through and she frowns when she doesn’t hear you answer and turns her head, grinning hard as her hand comes up to mouth.
“oh my god, mom.”
colleen turns around and lets out a giggle at the sight. somehow, at some point during the drive your head had fallen directly on wills shoulder.
will glances down then looks back up at grace.
“don’t.”
“but will—“
“grace.”
she clamps her mouth shut, rolling her eyes.
“she’s exhausted.”
“i know.”
“then leave her alone.”
grace looks at her brother offended, “can’t believe you thought i’d wake her up.”
will rolls his eyes at his older sister, looking down at you once more before leaning his head against the car window.
the next thing you know was someone gently shaking your shoulders to wake you. your eyes blink open, still confused and filled with sleep. for a moment, you forgot where you were and then it all hits you.
your head wasn’t resting against the seat, it was against a shoulder and not even graces— it was wills.
you shot upright so fast, you almost smack your head against the roof. your hand flies to your mouth as you look at will in shock and embarrassment. “oh my god— shit i’m so sorry i’m so sorry.”
will looks at you, smile resting on his face completely unbothered by the situation.
“it’s okay.”
you stare at him in disbelief, “i— what? this is so embarrassing.” you mumble, mortified.
colleen turns around, letting out a giggle before looking at the both of you. “i mean— at least we know that will does make a great pillow.”
grace snickers beside you, and you feel your cheeks heat up as you turn your head to face will who just laughs, his bunny teeth fully showing.
you were never living this down.
the car comes to a stop and you’re practically shoving at graces back wanting nothing more but out of that vehicle.
“quit shoving.” she huffs as she straightens her jacket. you roll your eyes, climbing out behind her almost tripping over your own feet but balancing yourself before you fell face first on the concrete.
“careful, will isn’t beside you to hoist you up.” she teases before running up to catch up with colleen who was already almost to the doors. your jaw drops as you curse her in your mind.
oh she’s definitely using this to her advantage.
-
you stand in bathroom beside grace taking off your makeup. you’re both changed up and getting ready for bed. for a while, neither of you said anything which should have been your first warning sign because grace was never quiet.
you look up and catch her eye in the mirror, she was staring with a smile resting on her face.
“what?”
“nothing.”
“why are you looking at me like that?”
she grins slowly, still wiping away at the makeup on her face. “you looked pretty comfortable.”
you fucking knew it.
“dude— don’t start.”
“for someone who was stressing of staying at my brothers place—“
“grace.”
“you sure seemed comfortable using him as a pillow.”
you almost drop the face wash that you were holding in your hand, giving her a dirty look trying not to laugh at the way she was looking at you.
“shut up oh my god.”
“just a friendly observation.”
“zip it.”
grace giggles, as she returns her focus back on removing her makeup. you stare at her for a second longer before squeezing some of your face wash in your hand and emulsifying it before applying it to your face.
your eyes catch graces again who seemed way too pleased with herself.
“this week is going to be fun.”
and for some reason— that comment made your stomach flip for reasons that had absolutely nothing to do with the scholarship anymore.
-
taglist: @wshlvr @thankgodidonthaveaname @defiantodysseywarrior @its-shaula-wii @ari1087 @kksturns
locked out - will smith
summary: scarred by the past, frightened by what the people around you had experienced before you, you made up your mind: you didn’t want a relationship. after meeting at a college party, will manages to mess with the only thing you’re sure of. you're still very much convinced you do not want to date anyone, let alone an athlete. yet, you find yourself constantly chasing after him warnings: swearing, underage drinking, themes of self-sabotage, one mention of usage of drugs, hurt/comfort towards the end + gabe and leno get mentioned quite a bit wc: 6.2k note: hiii, first time writing about smitty because i genuinely could not see the appeal up until like a month ago. i see it now, i sure do... anyways, i truly hope u guys like this because i had a blast writing it!
the sun had been set for a couple of hours already, when you stepped outside of your dorm room. you hadn’t really planned it, but your study session was burning you out, and that text in your friends’ group chat that talked about a party in one of the flats off campus was sounding way too nice for you not to reconsider it.
it wasn’t going to be a full night out, just a quick five-minute run for a beer and a chat.
when you stepped in, you were welcomed by many familiar faces: the girl that was somehow always sitting at the table next to yours in the library, one of your course mates you tutored and, obviously, multiple friends, most of which were engaged in a beer pong match.
a couple of greetings later, you grabbed a cheap canned beer from the kitchen counter and cracked it open as you made your way through the living area, looking for a place to sit. it turned out to be one of the plastic chairs scattered around the room.
you leaned back in the chair, cramped and flushed, but still feeling the best you had all day. your eyelids closed slowly, you let yourself bask in the warm feeling of being surrounded by people and the loud music, slightly muffled by all the talking. it was chaotic, but it was familiar.
“smitty! c’mere, dude.” you heard a voice yell out from a distance, shortly followed by a deep sigh from your right side. your peace was officially interrupted.
you turned in your seat, unable to mind your own business, and you saw him. he was so charming, blond curls framing his face perfectly, slightly outgrown without looking unintentionally messy. yet, there was something about his expression that seemed stressed, almost uneasy.
you could’ve just dropped it. you should’ve, probably, but after a day spent with your head inside five different textbooks, you were craving some fun, an interaction, anything.
you caught the guy’s gaze with yours and nodded towards the hallway. “seems like someone’s looking for you.”
he looked almost surprised by you, and the fact that you were talking to him. he gave you a half-hearted scoff, “nah, he’ll be fine.”
it was unexpected to see him still looking directly at you, his whole body turning the slightest bit towards you, that would’ve been hardly noticeable to anyone else in the room. you sure did notice, though. you wanted to keep talking to him, you thought about coming up with an excuse, or trying to stay on topic and talk about his friend, but you gave up.
“what’s your name?” you asked, resting your elbow on the arm of the chair and your chin against your open palm, eyes analyzing his features.
he was cute, and had that boyish look that made you go crazy. his hair was that shade of blonde that you’d only ever seen on children, who’d eventually grown out of it. his eyes were sapphire blue and expressive, so round and big they felt like they could swallow you whole.
“will.” he introduced himself, one corner of his lips softly pulling up.
you could’ve stopped at your name, see what he would say next, but you didn’t. you did tell him your name, but also let your curiosity seep out. “what about ‘smitty’?” you questioned, again.
“that’s my last name.” he replied, with shrugging shoulders.
your eyebrows furrowed in honest confusion. “your last name’s smitty?”
he did his best to bite back a laugh, “no, it’s smith.”
at that point, you genuinely started to believe he was making fun of you. “…your name is will smith?” you posed the question, to which he answered with a nod and another suppressed giggle. “i don’t believe you one bit.” you spat out flatly.
he shot one single amused look at you as his hand slipped in the front pocket of his hoodie, fumbling while he looked around it for something. he extracted what he was looking for and held it out for you. there it was, the school id card, with his picture and his legal name.
your eyes somehow widened even more, and you bursted into a laughter. “oh my god, that’s ridiculous.”
he shook his head like you had just slapped him in the face, snatching the id from you hands. “wh- hey! that’s mean.”
you just played along and winked at him, still chuckling.
“you’ll survive, will smith.”
the rest of the night passed by easily: you two sat there and talked each other’s ears off. you covered so many different topics: you learnt several stories about his hockey tournaments, his family and teammates, what adapting to the college lifestyle had been like.
he told you he didn’t like parties, that he always thought something might’ve gone wrong there, that’s why he didn’t look like he was in his element at all. he was far more well-spoken and articulated than the average frat boys and college athletes you had encountered before — not that it took much.
it was endearing, to say the least; you could’ve listened to him for hours.
unfortunately, life had other plans for you: your friend dragged you out, almost forcefully, drunk and in need of someone trusted to help her get home. you barely had time to say goodbye to will, but you swore it wouldn’t be the last time you two saw each other.
you ended up laying in bed at three in the morning, wide awake, with a snoring girl beside you and a random boy you’d never seen before infesting your thoughts. sheets up to your chin, you decided to let it go and sleep it away, thinking it would be easy to forget those big blue eyes and that warm, syrupy smile.
everything kept going at its normal pace: you kept studying, tutoring your friends, hanging out when you were in the right mood. you just so happened to be in the mood almost everyday, and your eyes happened to scan around each room you entered, looking for someone.
neither you nor will had really made a step towards the other. you didn’t talk, text, you weren’t in contact by any means. you still searched for him everywhere, hoping he would just materialize in front of your eyes at the cafeteria or during one of your classes. classes that he wasn’t even supposed to attend to begin with.
you had never believed in old tales, especially never believed in the rhetoric that things happened when you least expected. that must’ve been why, when you decided to stretch your legs and go for a walk around the reservoir in the middle of campus, you sat down on a bench not expecting anything. not expecting him.
twenty minutes passed with you sitting cross-legged with a notebook in your hands, only ever bothered by the sound of crickets chirping in the distance or the evening joggers pacing around the area. the wind blew through your hair, getting you out of your head and preventing you from crashing out over your coursework.
a few people trotted along the trail in front of you. you didn’t bother raising your head from the papers in front of you, until you heard the sound of debris cracking under someone’s steps. they were decisive, and getting closer to you.
“you guys go on, i’ll be right back.”
you’d recognize that voice just about anywhere.
your eyes glanced up in his direction, settling on his frame right away. it felt like a weight lifted off your stomach, like you hadn’t gone completely crazy and imagined him, imagined the way you’d interacted, at that party. he was really there.
will was there, in front of you. he was with his friends, but had deliberately gone out of his way to approach you. you were even more convinced of him being different from the other college athletes you’d met before.
“well, hello, will smith.” you chirped, closing the notebook that was resting over your thighs.
his head shook giddily, he took a seat on the bench, next to you. suddenly, you became hyperaware of his closeness, the way you inhaled his scent everytime you took a breath, the fabric of the sweatshirt draped over his shoulders that touched your arm.
“are you seriously going to call me my full government name everytime we meet?” he sighed, face showing no sign of annoyance whatsoever.
“you’re lucky i can’t remember your middle name.”
his hand raised to cover his mouth, muffling a laugh. “what if i told you i have two?”
“no fucking way! you have to tell me, now.” you exclaimed, only to be welcomed by his shaking head. “that’s, like, a moral obligation. you can’t deny me of that!”
truthfully, having an extra reason to make fun of him might’ve been the highlight of the night. you tried to extort the information from him for a good ten minutes, going as far as to bribe him with the stale, half melted snickers bar in your bag. all that effort, to receive nothing but laughter in return.
a tall, dark haired boy, who you could swear you’d seen before, came up to you. he introduced himself as ryan, then told the blond sitting next to you that they needed to go, otherwise they would be late. you didn’t question it further, you didn’t think you were at that stage yet.
“i’ll see you around, yeah?” will said, turning his attention back to you. you nodded, giving both him and ryan a small smile, before they left you alone again with your books.
it had been merely a week since that evening, the wind was howling around campus as you made your way through the cobbled alleyways. another party. this time, you didn’t feel the need to take your mind off of anything. on the contrary, you hoped to come across the subject of all of your thoughts.
walking through the door of the nearby bustling bar, you were greeted by a couple of friends who were, for some reason, grouped up right by the entrance.
grouped with them was ryan, will’s friend you’d met at the lake, who seemed to be very close with one of your friends. of course he seemed familiar, you’d been forced to see pictures of him for months on end, accompanied by her screaming about how 'dreamy and sweet' he was.
the second his gaze settled on you, he treated you like you were a lifelong buddy of his: he wrapped an arm around your shoulders, pulling you into a bone-crushing hug before any of your much closer friends had a chance to.
“your boy’s over there!” he shouted after the round of greetings, pointing in the distance towards a small group, four or five boys, standing close to the counter.
your eyes fell onto that cascade of blonde locks that could belong to one person only. he must had gotten a haircut sometime between your meetings, hair now shorter on the back and the sides, but you could still see the strands effortlessly resting over his forehead as he turned around, taking a sip from his redbull can and talking to someone.
debating whether to walk over immediately or wait a second, settling in first, you stood there in silence for a while. will looked around absentmindedly, for some reason not expecting to spot your frame among the crowd in the slightest. his eyes met your own as he waved at you, hand gesturing for you to come closer.
you walked the few feet that were between you, approaching him with a tight-lipped smile and sweaty hands. he definitely didn’t need to know about the last part.
he took quick notice of you being empty handed. “let me get you a drink!” he exclaimed.
you tried to stop him, but all your complaints got ignored — he was already talking to the man behind the counter, asking for something you couldn't hear.
the speakers hanging from the wall were blasting the typical college bar music, those same overplayed rap songs that nobody really listened to in other contexts. you couldn’t say you enjoyed being there, but you forgot all about it when will turned around. he was holding a new can of redbull in one hand and a cup filled with what seemed like cola, mixed with god knows what, in the other.
“jack and coke,” he informed you, as if reading your mind. “hope it’s alright.”
“it’s more than okay, you didn’t have to.” you replied, apologetically, taking the cup from his hand. “thank you.”
he shrugged, not very smooth at hiding the blush spreading across his face. you couldn’t help the smug smile that appeared on your lips.
the two of you fell into conversation with the usual ease that characterized each of your meetings: you updated him on your exams - shocked that he remembered (and asked) about your modern history one -, he shared some highlights from the latest hockey games he and the team had played, then told you you needed to go watch him play, someday.
he took the opportunity to introduce you to some of his teammates, the boys he’d been talking to before you’d walked in.
he was approximate in the introductions with everyone besides gabe, his 'best friend and favourite roommate', or so the brown-haired boy had told you, despite will’s head vigorously shaking from behind him. gabe tried to tell you about something that had happened during class, but both of them kept cutting the story off with uncontrollable giggles.
you were genuinely confused, just trying to piece the anecdote together, when it clicked.
“are you high?”
gabe’s eyebrows shot up, his head turned in will’s direction as his head shook alarmedly, thinking you wouldn’t notice. “uh… no?” he blurted out, unsurely.
trying to keep up the nonchalant act was useless, especially when the two guys in front of you kept cackling like little kids. you ended up laughing with them, at their ridiculous behaviour and their vain attempt to return to the story they’d been trying to tell you.
“holy shit, you guys are crazy.” you chuckled, before another realization hit you. “isn’t that your second can?” you questioned, pointing at will’s hand.
“third, actually.” he said, like it was the most normal thing in the world. your hand reached out and grabbed the energy drink, snatching it from his hold despite his protests.
your third companion got stolen from you and will halfway through the night, leaving the two of you alone and sat in a booth, snacking on peanuts and sharing your drink as you chatted just about anything.
by one in the morning, most of the people had gone home, leaving you and a couple more night owls in the bar. will had left you for a couple of minutes, headed for the bathroom. he walked back and frantically searched in his pockets first, then on the table, on the floor, around the counter. whatever he was looking for, he surely didn’t look close to finding it.
“holy fucking shit!” he screeched, running his fingers through his own hair.
“what’s wrong?”
he looked your way, eyes red and wide. “i think i lost my id, fuck!” he thundered, taking his seat in front of you once again.
“maybe you just forgot it in your room. have you tried calling gabe?” you suggested.
his eyes lit up, like you had just discovered some ancient ruins out in the wild. you could barely suppress a laughter. phone in his hands, he fumbled through the contacts before he found his roommate’s, then pressed the ‘call’ button.
one, two, three rings, nothing. will let the phone ring some more, still nothing. he heard something from the other side and nearly jumped from the excitement, only to be greeted by the robotic sound of the voicemail. he threw his phone on the table, somehow managing not to crack the glass, and let his head hang low, supported only by his hands.
shaking your head, you picked it up as you tried your best to come up with a solution. he couldn't get into his flat without the id, and he would have had to wait until morning, at least, to contact the department and have them give him a new one.
you extended your hand, holding his phone for him to take. “hey, it’s fine. you can stay in my room and wait for him to pick up the phone.”
he took his head out of his hands, looking up at you. “are you sure you don’t mind? i don’t want to-“
you interrupted him. “will, it’s fine, just come with me.”
he stopped arguing, knowing it would be useless to keep going. he took a deep breath and gave you a firm nod, and you two started making your way through the small crowd and out the door. it took about ten minutes to reach your building, but it was oddly pleasant. the campus was quiet, dark, the soft breeze still carried that summery feeling.
will talked, he nearly talked too much, sometimes stumbling upon his own words. the stairs were the hardest part: he kept walking like he had two left feet, his weight solely sustained by the railings, and you kept having to shush his loud giggles, that risked you getting kicked out of your own dorm room.
“you’re so loud.” you whispered as you unlocked your room’s door, after telling him to quiet down for what seemed like the thousandth time.
one of his eyebrows shoot up, like what you’d just said was a personal affront to him. “is that supposed to be a drag?”
the door swung open and you rolled your eyes as you stepped inside, holding it open for him to mirror your actions.
“it’s supposed to be an observation, will.” you remarked, and he simply laughed.
the two of you sat together on your bed, backs against the wall, as you scrolled through your phone and he looked over from your shoulder, with curious eyes. that night, you learned will went out like a light when he was tired: one second he was laughing at a silly video showing up, the next one all you heard were soft snores and the static sound of his breathing.
when his phone lit up with an incoming call from gabe, you almost debated not waking him up and letting him stay in your room, but you went against it. your heart almost broke when you shook him awake, eyes like a deer’s in headlights as he tried to blink the sleep away. he agreed to meet gabe downstairs and walk back to their flat together.
once the call ended, his arms were quick to wrap around you, while you two were still sat on the mattress. he held you tight, like he was scared you could slip away from him, and whispered a quiet ‘thank you’ to your ear, before getting up and leaving.
alone with yourself, the loud thumping of your heart became almost unbearable, and you knew you needed to sleep it off.
when you woke up the following morning, all wrapped in the blankets, you noticed a navy blue piece of fabric mixed in as well. a few blinks and you finally realized it was will’s sweatshirt, the one he’d rid himself of and discarded like he was in his own room.
in hindsight, you knew it was the perfect opportunity to see him again, and you should’ve been happy about it. but something about having to go to the rink to see will hit you with the reality you had tried to put off for the past weeks: he was a college athlete. it’s not like you didn’t know, because you did, you’d known since your very first meeting, at that party.
it was more like you brain had tried to shut that information out, mostly because he didn’t feel like one: he didn’t feel like the football player that had ghosted you after sending you nonstop texts, like the lacrosse player who had cheated on your friend with half of his english class, like any other guy that had made you stray away from the athlete-type.
perhaps you were being ridiculous, borderline delusional, but you truly believed he was different. so, that afternoon, you took your time getting ready. you wanted to look nice, wear something cool, but that was casual enough that it didn’t scream ‘i tried too hard’ — or worse, ‘i have a huge crush on you’. you didn’t. you definitely didn’t have a crush on will. you were going there out of pure love for the game.
it seemed foolish enough on its own, you didn’t need to label it as something so serious, at least not in your head.
after asking your friend, the one that had the hots for ryan, to tag along for the game, the two of you walked your way to the forum, surrounded by dark, tall trees and beams of sunlight. once you reached the entrance, standing on the few steps that led to the main door, you caught a glimpse of him. he was wearing a full black suit and his hair was gelled back.
you’d told yourself you were going out of your way to show up to a hockey game just to tell him about that damn sweater, but truly, it was because you couldn’t get him out of your head. you hated yourself for drooling over him more than you hated him for being so ridiculously beautiful.
he walked in without even noticing you were there, too busy chatting with his friends. you sighed in the most self-deprecating manner you could, before hooking your arm through your friend’s and walking inside.
the entirety of the game was spent staring at him whenever he was on the ice and desperately looking for him whenever he was on the bench, eyes darting left and right in search of that six on his back. you couldn’t help it, it was surely his fault for looking so good in red and having his eyes pop so much in the color.
the game ended with a home win for the team. ryan texted the girl sitting next to you, asking if the two of you wanted to go celebrate with them — the celebration being one or two drinks in the same bar as last time, since most of them had classes in the morning.
you waited outside of the facility, sitting on the steps with your friend, until you heard the faint - yet deeply distinguishable - sound of will’s laughter. he walked right by you, but you needed to get his attention.
“hey, will smith,” you joked, snorting when he turned around and jokingly rolled his eyes at the sound of his own name, “you forgot your sweater in my room.”
his mouth opened, eyebrows raising. “oh.” he mumbled, excusing himself to his friends as he walked the short distance between you. “uhm… i’ll just- i can come pick it up?” he stuttered slightly, like he couldn’t find the right words.
you chuckled at his poor attempts at forming a coherent sentence, then shrugged. “sure, whenever you want. i’ll be locked in, studying.”
the discourse died as quickly as it had started. he apologized for not greeting you properly and pulled you into a hug. he smelled fresh, with a hint of vanilla, and his arms around you caged you in a way that you knew would make you crave more.
you walked together to the bar, a couple of feet behind the others. it was a rather mundane evening, but you stood by each other’s side the entire time, and you got an extra chance to bond more with his friends, especially his roommates.
he ended up leaving earlier, the weariness from the game catching up to him. he told you he’d pick up the disregarded sweater some time later.
he was knocking on your door the following day, clock hands reading 9pm. you felt bad about giving him the sweater and letting him walk away like that, so you invited him to stay a little longer, watch a movie or something. you even let him pick the movie, surprised when he ended up choosing a cheesy romcom you would have never pictured him watching.
he was close, the side of your body was basically glued to his own, he had to lay his arm on the bed’s headboard, right behind your head, to make some space. the room on your twin bed was limited; you could smell his body wash with every breath you took, and you could feel his ribcage expanding with every breath he took.
sometime between scenes, your eyes swiftly moved from the screen to his own, only to find him already looking at you. he didn’t try to be sneaky about it, didn’t look away, he just held your gaze, with an unspoken intensity that was making the air grow thick.
“your eyes are so… blue.” you blurted out, before you could stop your mouth.
he scoffed, shaking his head lightly. “yeah, that i knew.”
“oh, fuck you.” you mumbled, before your arms locked around his neck and you pulled him into a kiss, lips slotting perfectly against each other’s.
a sigh slipped out of him, followed by a barely audible moan. some might consider it fucked up, but perhaps you got off on knowing that you had him wrapped around your finger. it was a fulfilling feeling that gave you that rush of adrenaline humans were addicted to, and got in trouble searching for.
and you were in trouble, because you were wrapped around his finger just as much. hell, you were all in it.
suddenly, you were hyper aware of your skin touching his, of the laptop being set on your nightstand, of his hands circling around your waist to pull you closer. his lips were soft, inviting, they made you want to give in. but you were still, teetering on the edge of a precipice that you’d caused yourself.
in the darkness and quietness of the room, only disturbed by the muffled sounds of your laboured breathing and the clicking of lips, you realized just how real it was. how real and scary and not concordant with what you'd decided for yourself it truly was.
were you ready to jump in?
you wished you could keep your spot on top of the cliff, with a single foot hanging from it. yet, you knew you couldn’t. you couldn’t keep him on the edge with you; he didn’t deserve to be swallowed by your paranoia and the habit you had of crossing bridges before you came to them.
you indulged in the moment a little longer, allowing yourself to feel the tenderness of his lips, the warmth of his breath crashing onto your face and the feeling of his hands roaming your body, before pulling away. you didn’t say a word, just placed the laptop back on your legs and started the movie from where you’d left off.
body smashed against the wall, you tried to keep your distance as much as you could. you thought about telling him something, that you shouldn’t have done that, that it was a mistake, but you couldn’t. it wasn’t the truth and you didn’t want him to feel like he’d done something wrong.
will didn’t comment your actions, just sat back in his spot as you finished your film. when he got up and told you he’d see you around, he expected something more than a smile and a wave, but that was all he got. the thought he might’ve messed something up crossed his mind briefly, but you definitely would’ve told him if anything had happened, right?
wrong.
the worst, most self-sabotaging part of you decided to avoid him at all costs. not only did you not reply to any of the texts he sent you, but you also made sure to avoid the spots you knew he’d be at, basically locking yourself in your room when you were not attending class. it lasted for about a week.
on a regular thursday, on your way back from the grocery store, you got off the bus and saw the oddly familiar figure. he was wearing a school-branded hoodie you’d seen him in a couple of times before, and was walking on the sidewalk with a few more people.
as sneakily as you could, you crossed the road and walked down the sidewalk on the opposite side of the road, making turns you weren’t used to and ending up taking the long way to your building, all to avoid confrontation.
it was for the better, you thought. you were doing him a favour: he didn’t need to be worrying about you and the stupid way your brain was wired — and you didn’t want him to be just another one of the many, more data to add to your hypothesis.
what you didn’t know was that your 'favour' was painfully, agonizingly slowly, killing will. he stayed up at night, replaying every moment you two had shared and overanalyzing it, trying to find the moment where it all went wrong.
he didn’t harass your phone with texts, he wasn’t that type of guy, but the radio silence from your side was destroying him. it didn’t help that you seemed to have completely disappeared from the surface of the earth.
when he saw you with the corner of his eye, on that thursday afternoon, he thought he’d seen a ghost. he was about to run to you, already wondering what you might tell him. he turned around, and you were walking the opposite way, already too far to even hear him call out your name.
he went back to the shared flat, face mournful and unable to hide it from his best friends, who called an immediate emergency meeting in the middle of the kitchen, between piles of dirty plates and takeout boxes.
he slouched back in his chair, hands running through his hair like he wanted to rip it all out. “i don’t know what the fuck i did wrong, guys, i’m serious.”
ryan and gabe stood in silence for a moment, looking at him, then at each other.
“talk to her, then.” ryan said, matter-of-factly, receiving a smack on the back of his head from the youngest of the three.
will groaned, head now falling onto the table. “how? she’s never around. the only time i see her, she changes direction to avoid me.” he nearly whined. he felt pathetic, but he was truly desperate.
gabe’s mouth opened, like he wanted to say something, before closing again. “wait outside her room?” he mumbled, but it ended up sounding more like a question.
“…that’s so creepy!”
“yeah, fine,” he admitted, raising his hands. “how about outside of class? you know where she studies, right?”
the following morning, will asked - or, well, forced - ryan to have your best friend send him the specific timing of your classes for the day. he wasn’t going to give you up, not without a reason.
he showed up outside of your classroom ten minutes before the end of the lecture, bolts of adrenaline running through his body at the mere idea of seeing you and finally speaking to you after what seemed like an eternity — in reality, it had only been a few days.
you, on the other hand, shoved your things into your bag and made your way out of the door and into the hallway, expecting anything but to see will standing right next to the doorway, arms crossed to his chest and foot tapping continuously against the floor.
his eyes raised to look at you the second you stepped out, and you knew there was no sneaking away left to do.
fuck.
will didn’t look mad, rather sad. it shattered you, but you couldn’t give in. you couldn’t afford to be disappointed by him, not after you’d idealized him so much in your head, pictured him as the perfect guy and everything. you wanted to relive the memories you’d made together for the rest of your life while being locked inside a stone fortress, where nothing and nobody could ever hurt you.
but he’d gotten in the way of that process, and was standing in front of you, gaze heavy with unanswered questions and doubts.
“why are you running from me?” he spat out, after a minute of just looking into each other’s eyes and waiting for the other to cede.
you shrugged, like you had nothing to do with the discourse. “what are you talking about?”
he knitted his brows, a quiet scoff slipping past his lips. “you keep running away everytime i try to talk to you. you literally crossed the road yesterday just to avoid me.”
“excuse me?” you nearly gasped, startled that he’d even noticed it. “what’s your problem, will?”
“no, what the fuck is your problem?” he asked, voice slightly louder as the rasp in it got more prominent. it all just made him seem ten times more attractive, and you hated it.
you sighed, running a hand down your face, probably smudging your mascara in the process. that was a hell of a question, and you truly wished you had an answer for him. you didn’t even have one for yourself.
“just leave it, alright? forget it.”
his head shook violently. “i can’t, i keep thinking about it… what happened in your room. did i do something wrong?” he asked, “we can just pretend it nev-“
you interrupted him, simply because you were sure you would’ve started crying if you didn’t. “no, it’s not you. leave it, will, i’m serious.” you practically begged, holding yourself in one piece with all the mental strength you had.
he was getting frustrated, and you couldn’t blame him. his arms fell to his sides, as one of his hands hurriedly ran through his hair the same way it always did.
“what have i even done to you?”
“nothing, just drop it.” you repeated, shaking your head once more. you turned on your heels and started walking towards the hallway, unable to keep up with the façade you’d given yourself.
“please, just tell me.” he lunged forward and stopped you in your tracks, holding your wrist in his hand. “please.” he whispered, reaching for your other wrist with his free hand.
he was suddenly close, very close. the musky scent of his cologne was punching its way up your nostrils.
“you’re insufferable, you know that?” you whispered, not fully sure he even heard that.
your hands flew to his face, resting against his cheeks as you took that extra step forward, closing the distance between you two. your lips smashed against his hungrily, like you needed that contact to survive. you were sure you did.
will nearly tumbled backwards, holding himself up with an arm against the wall behind him. it took him a second to realize what was actually happening: it wasn’t a dream, you were indeed kissing him, your tongue was actually tracing the outline of his bottom lip, your fingers were really tangled in his hair.
the two of you only pulled away because you realized that, despite the lack of sounds and people around you, you were still standing in the middle of a school building, panting like dogs and flushed in the face.
will was a sight, with tousled hair and those wet eyes of his, chest rising and falling quickly with his breathing.
“i’m sorry, i’m an idiot.” you murmured, to yourself more than him.
why would you willingly prevent yourself from experiencing a relationship? because the first one hadn’t gone as planned, because you were surrounded by failing couples and were terrified of ending up in the same situation?
it was ridiculous, and you were realizing it as your eyes stared into will’s, desiring nothing more than to be snuggled up to him in your room, talking about everything and nothing at the same time.
with a heart beating so fast that you thought it might burst out of your chest, you apologized. you apologized to the boy in front of him for acting like a total jerk, you told him it wasn’t his fault, that it was a mental thing of yours. he listened, not saying a single word, before wrapping his arm around your shoulders and walking you towards the door — and then outside.
while the two of you wandered around, with nowhere specific to be, you continued your rambling in detail. you told him why you’d acted that way, what scared you the most about your own feelings for him, that you had to live with unhealthy coping mechanisms.
he understood, of course he did. he didn’t question it any further, just reassured you enough for you to melt into his arms as you pulled him into a hug. he smiled to himself, hands caressing up and down your back with a care that was astonishing.
your lashes fluttered against his shoulder, arms wrapping tighter around his middle. you weren’t letting him go, not again.
maybe you could love as carelessly as you’d always hoped.
watched the best bc will edit ever and it made me think of this… my precious baby 🥹
men's sports rpf is ethical because i'm making that man significantly more empathetic and emotionally intelligent, and with a much richer inner world. he should be thanking me, actually
come on now.
GRRRRR BARK BARK WOOF WOOF
may i add
i feel like a vampire
normal things happening in my search history
if there was an award for dry humor and wit, my vote would go to you
bf!minten texts! <3
cw: semi suggestive, lwk boring my bad😭
taglist: @smithlovn @engelsmoment @nuoctis @smittylovr @hermionesimp @banan1ca @mosseetrees @wherethezoes-at @am-271 @destinyg237 @sjujus
Did Joyt deactivate?
IDKK i couldn’t see her blog yesterday and i had my bsf check on it as well cause i was like ‘what if she blocked me or something’
i’ll contact her and let you guys know!! my jyot my wife 😕
connor bedard could put me in a chokehold and id be on top if the world like look at his fucking arms
why are you literally reading my mind
i’ve been thinking about him and those huge biceps sm the past few days like i have THOUGHTS
