will the fucking buckle edit ever NOT make me feel like this

roma★
wallacepolsom
Stranger Things

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Not today Justin

izzy's playlists!

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Sweet Seals For You, Always

Product Placement
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trying on a metaphor

@theartofmadeline
art blog(derogatory)
Mike Driver

tannertan36
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
AnasAbdin

Andulka

ellievsbear
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@defnotcatgrass
will the fucking buckle edit ever NOT make me feel like this
i'm still in the fucking building
oh shut the fuck uppppp i can’t stand him
day 153 of noticing: shane moaning "yeah" when ilya starts kissing his neck
Sugar Daddy Shane and Sugar Baby Ilya. Ilya cuts ties with his family and makes his way to Canada but it’s not as easy as he thought starting anew. He’s struggling so he enters into an arrangement with Shane. Shane views the whole arrangement as very practical. He doesn’t have time for dating and he doesn’t have to deal with the anxiety of wondering if someone really likes him or not. They both know why the other is here and that makes it easy. The arrangement is going fine until Ilya realizes he’s in love with Shane and breaks it off immediately. He lies and tells Shane he got this great job so he doesn’t need the money anymore. Shane is sad, because he’s also in love, but doesn’t stop him. He wishes Ilya well and leaves the door open for him to return to the arrangement if he ever wants or needs to. Some time later, Shane is out and sees Ilya working as a bartender, looking like he hasn’t gotten a goodnight sleep since they last saw each other. Shane confronts Ilya. Ilya tries to deflect but Shane won’t let him. He asks Ilya if he did something wrong or made Ilya uncomfortable. He thinks maybe he didn’t hide his love for Ilya well enough and starts to apologize, but Ilya stops him. He admits he ended things because he’s in love with Shane and left before he could embarrass them both. Shane kisses Ilya, confesses his love and asks Ilya to move in.
a selection of photos taken by other people from their first year of marriage:
towards the end of their wedding reception, sun setting, looking rumpled and tired, Ilya kissing Shane's palm while Shane is very seriously talking to Scott Hunter
the two of them with a fan, taken at the dog park, Ilya holding Anya and Shane with one arm around his husband's shoulder and the other trying to prevent Anya from licking the fan's face
Shane Hollander sitting on the Centaurs bench with blood on his face, mouth wide open, Ilya Rozanov gripping his chin and glaring at the gap where Shane's bottom canine used to be
Ilya Rozanov with his fist in the air after a goal, a smear of red in the corner of his mouth
sitting next to each other at team tape review, heads bent together, Ilya's hand on Shane's thigh, Shane's hands sketching out a play in the air
Ilya Rozanov leaning against his car in the airport arrivals line, a coffee in one hand and a forest-green smoothie in the other
Shane Hollander giving his husband the middle finger after losing the shot accuracy competition at ASG by half a second
piggyback racing across the yard with a Pike twin each clinging to their necks
Ilya Rozanov, outraged, with a face full of snow, as his husband doubles over with laughter
wearing identical blank expressions the seventeenth time a journalist asks about their "off-ice chemistry"
Shane Hollander throwing his head back and cackling in a booth at a random dive bar in a random city, Ilya Rozanov grinning into his drink
asleep on the team bus after game 5 of the conference finals, Ilya curled into Shane's shoulder
ok i'm still thinking about the branding thing. au where your soulmate leaves a brand on you in some way when you touch them - maybe their ring leaves a mark when you shake hands, or you both come away with marks from brushing arms on the subway - and they burn hot, just for a moment, just enough to make you notice. and shane and ilya both think they're fine because nothing happened when they met. they shook hands, and slammed each other into the boards, and kissed and touched and fucked and nothing. and it's perfect. until it isn't. until they both want more and want to stop wanting more but can't bring themselves to break it off despite the fact that they're both sure that any day now the other one will meet their soulmate. and it'll all be over. and then the tuna meltdown happens and then rose happens and ilya feels sick. constantly, every day, desperately wishing he'd been able to leave a mark on shane, that shane had left his mark on him. wishing even more desperately that he didn't want that. he's so sure that she's left her mark on shane that he almost doesn't go to tampa. almost comes up with some bullshit excuse. but he goes and shane walks into that bar looking so beautiful, his eyes and his smile and his freckles. and he's preparing to have his fears confirmed, but then shane says they weren't compatible. and he thinks he knows what it means and there's hope stirring in his belly, and when he finds shane on the beach and he asks for ilya's room number the hope crawls up his throat. but their thumbs brush and still nothing. no heat, no marks. and then up in that room, shane tells him he's gay, and ilya tells shane about his father, and shane kisses him and rocks him and just holds him. and when they finally fuck again it's slower and more reverent than ever before, and he flips shane on his belly and grinds into him slow and deep, leans down to whisper russian in his ear, because shane seems to like that, and his necklace lands on shane's shoulder. and it doesn't quite light up, not exactly. but ilya can see it. see when it goes hot and hear when shane cries out and comes, clenching around ilya and pulling him over the edge with him, and then ilya looks at the mark, traces it, kisses it, and shane whispers was that -?, and ilya doesn't really know what to say. yes doesn't seem like enough. nothing he could say does. he just lays his head on shane and nods. and feels tears prickling his eyes again. and shane pushes him off and goes to the bathroom to look and ilya's stomach drops again. he's sure shane is going to come back and tell ilya they can't. that he doesn't want him. that it must just be one sided. but instead he comes back and lays down and wraps himself around ilya, burying his face in his chest, and then ilya feels it - white hot, for just a moment. and shane sits up and they both look down and see a perfect imprint of shane's freckles right over ilya's heart.
happy one month anniversary to these pictures and only to these pictures
Ok, low stakes head canon time: tell me what you think Shane and Ilya’s favorite colors are.
hi friends just to let you know that the content/update admin is on vacation until next monday so there will be very slow or no updates on any events hudson attends between now and then (but we do still have a content queue!)
will post everything i miss when i can/when i get back ❤️ don’t miss me too much ❤️
hi this is also me so same goes for connor ❤️ love y’all uh
Natural Eye Color Chart
was stretching either tears in my eyes because my back is acting up again and my father who's not supposed to be in the house came into my room to comment on the situation
During Ilya’s first years in Boston his only friend is Cliff, they go out together, go to clubs, drink and pick up girls. Sometimes they pick up a girl or two and end up in the same hotel room together with the girls. Eventually the girls leave and Ilya and Cliff are left together in bed drunk af and unable to move so Ilya tells Cliff it wouldn’t make sense for him to go back to his room and he should just spend the night here. Ofc Cliff agrees because he’s way too out of it to move anyway.
Ilya wakes up in the middle of the night with Cliff’s hand draped over him and feels Cliff hard against his thigh which makes him start to get hard himself. Cliff is still asleep but there’s no way Ilya can go back to sleep now so he carefully turns around and starts grinding against Cliff who then starts to wake up. When he realizes what’s happening he doesn’t stop Ilya so Ilya takes them both in his hand and starts jerking them off. It doesn’t take long for both of them to come and then slowly drift back to sleep.
In the morning neither of them bring it up and Cliff goes back to his room so he can pack for the flight. This happens so many times and they never ever talk about it because they both assume it’s just a bro thing to do. They’re friends and they’ve been together with girls before so what if they give each other handjobs occasionally, that’s just what good friends do, they help each other out. It’s never awkward or uncomfortable it’s just something they do.
So this makes Ilya wonder why this isn’t how it feels with Shane. It was supposed to be the same, except they’re not even friends so why does he feel like he wants to cuddle with Shane but never with Cliff. Why does he think about Shane constantly but Cliff is just his friend who sometimes jerks him off. Why does he look forward to being with Shane but with Cliff it just happens and he’s not ever hung up on it. Of course he pushes the most obvious explanation out of his head because how can he actually like Shane, it doesn’t make sense. If must be something else.
Eventually he talks to Cliff and asks him if he feels like there’s something between them and Cliff says it’s always been casual but he now thinks he’s actually bi, however he only likes Ilya as a friend and Ilya agrees. So now Ilya is even more confused because does he actually like Shane what is going on? After a lot of thinking and denying and debating with himself he comes to the conclusion that he does like Shane maybe he even loves him but he would never actually tell him that because Shane definitely thinks about their hookups the way Cliff does and Shane is not his friend so he can’t just ask him about it because of course he doesn’t feel the same.
Years later after Shane and Ilya get married Ilya tells Shane about Cliff and how he thinks that their hookups were one of the reasons he discovered he loves Shane and Shane jokes that they should send Cliff a gift for it. When Ilya tells Cliff about it Cliff is so delighted and from then on he brags about being the reason hockey’s hottest couple got together whenever he has the chance. Shane and Ilya send him a little gift every year on their anniversary and Cliff looks forward to it every year.
Ilya has a stalker. The stalker has been with him for years, and he hasn’t told a soul. He isn’t sure why he hasn’t told anyone. Actually, that’s a lie. If Ilya was being honest, he hasn’t told anyone about the stalker because he likes the attention. He likes the texting, the late night conversations, being checked on, and cared about. It’s sad but the stalker is the most genuine connection he has.
‘Where are you going?’ The text messages lights up his screen.
“Out.” Ilya says. He still isn’t sure how the stalker got cameras and microphones in his home. He’s searched and can’t find them.
‘Another club? To pick up some girl?’
“I would not need to if you came out to play.” Ilya pockets his phone and heads out.
CONNOR STORRIE For Interview Magazine
taking my shantidepressants
fuuuuck i dropped them :/