jenna @deletethatfootage - Tumblr Blog

Midnights, the stories of 13 sleepless nights scattered throughout my life, will be out October 21. Meet me at midnight.

Pre-order now: https://taylor.lnk.to/taylorswiftmidnights

tiktoksinspo

justlookatthosesausages

I refuse to believe this did not happen in canon

aangarchy

Aang consistently forgetting he’s the most powerful human alive will never not be funny to me

counterpunches

#this is hte most perfectly captured rendering of aang and sokka’s dynamic asl;dkgalskfjas#they’re both smart in the exact way that cancels one another out into pure chaotic stupidity @fiddleabout

#avatar the last airbender

steampunkpirate131719

Bill Nye for most of his career: Imma do science for kids. Science without politics. Nice, tame science for the kiddos.

Bill Nye now:

kawaii-ash

BILL, BILL, BILL!!!!

homotology

And let’s not forget

cosmic-dust-poltergeist

I’d never seen that last one, but my life is better for it

crownquill

o m g

bread-jesus420

BILL NYE SAYS WOMENS RIGHTS, SCIENCE IS REAL, LGBTQ+ RIGHTS, AND HOMICIDE IS SOMETIMES OKAY

chaos-theory-exhibit-a

NOTHING but absolute RESPECT for the world’s substitute science teacher

the-gay-goblin

NOTHING but absolute RESPECT for the world’s substitute science teacher

1989taylorsversion

I've said it before and I'll say it again... Aaron Dessner and Taylor Swift produce timeless classic music together and it'll literally never get old

darkcomedies-deactivated2022042

watching this youtube video about victorian haircare wherein the woman testing the products out inhales so much alcohol fumes she gets tipsy and that’s joining lead in everything, corsets, and doctors who cured hysteria with vibrators in “reasons why victorian women loved fainting”

darkcomedies-deactivated2022042

me walking out of my fainting room after getting my back blown out by a medical professional face covered in lead makeup walls emerald green (also containing lead) high on the cocaine i was prescribed for allergies, tightening my corset: archibald darling i am seeing ghosts

dovesndecay

i’m okay with fictional men becoming unhinged over the loves of their lives actually

slowwshoww

suzanne collins killing prim after everything katniss did to save her.......... THATS how you write a story about the brutality and futility of war ma'am thats what we call a compelling and fucked up narrative yessums thats storytelling babes!!!!

#the hunger games

couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name

remus: you must pick a happy memory, harry, the happiest memory you have

harry: sir I live in a closet

common-houseplant

#'my happiest memory is something I'm not even sure really happened' 'huh well I'm not gonna call wizard cps or anything' via @couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name

#harry potter

ilya-halfelven

This flashback in ATLA, Azulon becoming enraged with Ozai for disrespecting Iroh and the recently deceased Lu Ten, is usually interpreted as Azulon then ordering Ozai to kill Zuko. I disagree with this for two reasons. 1: We don’t actually hear Azulon say that, it’s only referred to by Azula (who was around seven or eight at the time and might have misunderstood what she heard) and by Ozai, years later, when he is taunting Zuko on the Day of Black Sun. Neither Azula nor Ozai are reliable narrators. 2: Azulon is, at the time of this flashback, the ruler of the Fire Nation who has just lost one of his only two grandsons and heirs. What kind of monarch loses one heir and then turns around and demands the death of another, especially when losing Zuko would hardly bother Ozai? My interpretation of this situation is Azulon ordered Ozai to give Zuko into Iroh’s care, replacing Lu Ten as Iroh’s heir, neatly removing any argument Ozai had about Iroh’s line having ended. Ozai of course would never accept this. He either lied to Ursa, claiming Azulon wished Zuko dead, or outright told his wife he’d kill Zuko before seeing him get ahead of him in the line of succession, thus manipulating Ursa to help him assassinate Azulon. I think this theory makes far more logical sense than ‘Azulon ordered the murder of his nine-year-old grandson’.

#avatar the last airbender

geckosocks

My favorite thing about fanfic Zuko is that he just does not have a reference point for sexism. Like:

Some person: isn’t that women’s work?

Zuko, thinking of Azula, Mai, and Ty Lee: women’s work? You mean homicide?

beka-tiddalik

When Zuko becomes Fire Lord he’s sitting in a meeting where there happens to be only one female advisor, Takiko (Which strikes him as a bit weird but for now he’s got bigger gazellefish to fry because he’s still trying to figure out who is worth keeping around even if *sometimes* (every day) he’s tempted to just turf them all out and start from scratch rather than deal with the paranoia) and Takiko’s in the middle of giving a presentation when they run out of tea. One of the male advisors remarks on this loudly, staring pointedly at Takiko. Because some female in the room “obviously” she’s the one who should be making the tea.

Takiko, used to this nonsense, starts to move towards the pot but to the collective shock of everyone in the room she is waved away by the Fire Lord.

“No, no, you’re in the middle of your presentation, I’ve got this,” says Zuko.

Male advisor: *sputtering* “My Lord! Surely Takiko can do that. Is it not below your station to pour tea?”

Zuko: “It’s fine. Uncle Iroh always pours his own tea and he’s ranked above all of you.”

*Room collectively recalls that Uncle Iroh is Dragon of the West*

Male advisor, changing tack: “She has uh… much more experience with such things.”

Zuko: *displaying an impressive level of control in using a fire technique to heat the pot that he learned during his time working in the Earth Kingdom tea shop* “I doubt it.”

(The kicker: Zuko makes better tea than anyone in the room has had in an official meeting in *years*.)

#avatar the last airbender

transfemininomenon

a VERY good romance trope is a character (usually some kind of noble) being betrothed to someone and they spend the first half of the story just obsessively trying to return to them, only to realize during the second half of the story that the person theyre betrothed to is actually not a great person and they’ve instead fallen in love with one of the people they’re traveling with

transfemininomenon

you’re god damn right this is about shrek

imdeadtiredtm

I have tragically yet seen a A:TLA crack fic where canon! sokka gets suck in a modern, no powers AU. While juggling his counter identity, the everlasting bullshit that's American high school, bumbling at modern devices and slang, avoiding his sister and dad of this universe, and trying to find his way home... he's just like, huh. It's nice to have a hot minute thats not being a child soldier. And thus begins Sokka's journey doing absolutely batshit insanity thinking its even remotely in the ballpark of normal which includes but is not limited to:

• Joining the cheerleaders thinking that they’re like the kyoshi warriors. Furthermore seeing the make-up and skirt as integral to the art. (He's not wrong, and pulls it off amazingly)

• Met in universe Zuko, whos currently a jerk, but isn't also a human flamethrower and literally hunting him down. Sokka's just normal about it while Zuko insistences they're rivals. They fight in the hallways at least once (less a fight and more of zuko frantically throwing punches and Sukka ducking and blocking with the utmost and infuriating chill.)

• Wants money. So what does he do? Goes to a karate competition. Wins. Then proceeds not to tell anyone. Not out of any actual secrecy but because this is pretty standard Gaang stuff back home.

Que the frantic sensei that arrives at the door answered by the very confused Katara and Hakoda.

•Gets more into martial arts and literally freaking everyone out. Turns out, spending the majority of your short little life fighting, keeping up with, beating, and trying to survive from not only full grown masters, but also masters that can control forces of nature plus maybe a spirit or two makes you pretty damn good at fighting.

• Casual parkour. Twenty-four seven. On roofs. Climbing up brick walls. Gravity defying jumps. Ridiculous reflexes.

Naturally the modern him that lands in his universe is just screaming 24/7. But hey, they both go home in the end. Canon sokka gets a break, modern sokka gets a crisis, as a treat.

imdeadtiredtm

You know what? I'm not done.

• canon! sokka in the modern world can not adjust to the animals. Everything else is fine but every time he sees an animal. With-out fail he asks, "So, it’s just a crow?" "Just a cow? Only a cow?" "a dog what?" And if he's not asking he stares for a solid 20 seconds longer than he should.

• even when he learns that cheerleading isint a martial art he still stays because he sincerely believes that it's the superior sport. At first the team thought the whole thing was a joke but now they'd slaughter the school if he was wronged.

• he meets up with his (or I suppose alternative selfs) relatives only to find out that there is a sport they play together regularly. Literally it dosen't matter what it is because he looks it up in the library's encyclopedia he has in his bag (hasn't gotten used to tech yet) and goes "oh, that's it?" And beats the whole family single-handedly.

Once In public a relative asks his dad what he feeds him afterwards and he's asked at least 3 times privately.

• modern sokka does cosplay and is a total weeb so when canon! sokka stumbles towards the house no one bats an eye at how he’s dressed.

• if not being a child soldier for a bit wasn't a sweet enough deal, it's also the fact that the whole world feels made for him in the way that there is nothing like games or training rooms only benders would have access too. Not seeing bending is weird and he misses home but also so much less for him to try and figure out, you know?

• I legitimately can't tell what's funnier. If a portal/a dimension traveling spirit grabs sokka in the fucking middle of the cafeteria, canon!Gaang appears, and trades sokkas with no fucking explanation. Or, if it’s done in like an alley or something, modern! Zuko sees, and Canon! Sokka's last words are "no one, will ever believe you" before disappearing into the ether with what looks like another him.

#avatar the last airbender

nerdomancer

How’s the Swedish Christmas goat doing? Has it caught fire this year?

butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway

This is how apparently

severalowls

Security never saved it before. This is just the next level of difficulty and the gradual increase has only acted as training and made the Swedes unstoppable.

soaringsearingphoenix

The swedes r like^

explorerrowan

Security has saved it for the last 3 years, what are you talking about?

systlin

Well, it went via flaming arrow that one time, and tbh as a security pro there ain’t much you can do if someone shoots a flaming arrow over your head and into the goat.

Except, of course, nod in respect to your worthy and victorious opponent.

strawberrydragon

This wiki article is hilariously salty

strawberrydragon

STOLLEN? Isn’t this thing huge?

strawberrydragon

Yeah, I’m going to live-tumble my reading of this amazing wiki article. I’ll tag it “christmas goat” and “long post” if you want to block my nonsense. But you’ll miss gems like this:

strawberrydragon

There is only one sure way to save the goat. A mob that is filled with righteous anger.

strawberrydragon

But it doesn’t tell me WHO launched three successful attacks against the goats (btw there are two goats because the people who made the first goat got tired of people burning their goat, so they quit making it and another organization took up the task. The first organization started making their goat again after the second organization got into the Guinness Book of World Records for their goat’s size. So now the two groups continue to make separate goats.)

strawberrydragon