You were suspicious of their feelings because you had no reason to love yourself—not your body, not your mind. You rejected so much gentleness. What were you looking for?
Carmen Maria Machado, from In the Dream House: A Memoir
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

#extradirty
Cosimo Galluzzi
wallacepolsom
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
ojovivo
trying on a metaphor
occasionally subtle
will byers stan first human second
Today's Document

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taylor price
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Claire Keane
Peter Solarz

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blake kathryn

oozey mess
One Nice Bug Per Day
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@destructedyouth
You were suspicious of their feelings because you had no reason to love yourself—not your body, not your mind. You rejected so much gentleness. What were you looking for?
Carmen Maria Machado, from In the Dream House: A Memoir
“But I know about suffering; if that helps. I know that it ends.”
— James Baldwin, from If Beale Street Could Talk
Ada Limón, The Carrying
Alejandra Pizarnik, tr. by Yvette Siegert, from “The Dream of Death, or the Site of the Poetical Bodies”, Extracting the Stone of Madness: Poems 1962 - 1972
Headless John The Baptist Hitchhiking, C.T. Salazar
eurydice - sarah ruhl
Sylvia Plath, Winter Trees
Vladimir Nabokov, from Letters to Véra
In the name of Love, Katie Maria
( @heavensghost )
i wanna call and tell you every joke i know so your laugh can bounce around cell towers and keep the sky company. nothings lonelier than a world without your laugh. i learned that sooner than i wanted to and now i spend most of my days looking up, searching for where your voice might land. we can start from the beginning. i’ll meet you in a supermarket and we can argue about the best brand of toothpaste for the rest of our lives. you can tell me stories about when you were younger and climbing trees so you could talk to the birds. when i was younger i would cling to the leg of anyone on the ground, scared of what the world would do to me if i dared it. well i stopped clinging and now look what happened. mostly i’ve made peace with it but in small moments where i have time to miss you i let myself remember everything. i look up the weather where you are just to make sure you’re okay. i pray for everyone you love, knowing i’m not one of them, even if i came close. even if we both know that if you called me up one last time, i’d give you a chance to do everything differently. i don’t care what that sounds like. forever is a big word but i can make it tiny. fold it into something small enough for a bird to carry, with the hopes that it will reach you, even if it never will. but none of that matters now. it was always gonna end like this. my laugh never made you less lonely. i know because you stopped climbing trees. i know because you never look up.
via vsco.co
"Even if it is full of love, all a ghost can do is haunt."
or, the limitation of the medium | In stillness, terror. musings
Noël Coward, This is to Let You Know
How do you deal with grief? I just can't stop the overwhelming feeling of it.
i'm muslim so the islamic perspective comforts me a lot. the idea that the person isn't gone forever, that my prayers are reaching them, that the love i have for them meets them where my hands can't. i was chosen to love them. i was chosen to lose them because God knew i would still make something of their love. but muslim or not, the point remains true. the love you had and still have for them is making the world a softer place. every smile you give a stranger. every bird you feed on your morning walk. every hug you give to someone who's still living. this is your greatest evidence. yes, someone loved me once. yes, they walked with me here once and i look for their footsteps still. yes, i dream them back all the time. yes, they made the world bearable, and i will too. ill do for others what they did for me with all the love they left behind.
that question about grief had been sitting in my inbox for a little and i didn’t answer it because i didn’t think i had anything to offer at first. how can i convince someone to bear the pain of missing someone for the rest of a lifetime. but seeing people say it helped even the smallest amount healed me in a way i wasn’t expecting. i’m sorry so many people needed it. i’m sorry so many people have lost someone. i don’t know what or who you’ve lost but i love them because you loved them. and i’m so happy you got to have them. and i’m devastated you have to survive a world without them. and i hope you’ll meet again.
“December 24th and we’re through again. This time for good I know because I didn’t throw you out — and anyway we waved. No shoes. No angry doors. We folded clothes and went our separate ways. You left behind that flannel shirt of yours I liked but remembered to take your toothbrush. Where are you tonight? Richard, it’s Christmas Eve again and old ghosts come back home. I’m sitting by the Christmas tree wondering where did we go wrong. Okay, we didn’t work, and all memories to tell you the truth aren’t good. But sometimes there were good times. Love was good. I loved your crooked sleep beside me and never dreamed afraid. There should be stars for great wars like ours. There ought to be awards and plenty of champagne for the survivors. After all the years of degradations, the several holidays of failure, there should be something to commemorate the pain. Someday we’ll forget that great Brazil disaster. Till then, Richard, I wish you well. I wish you love affairs and plenty of hot water, and women kinder than I treated you. I forget the reason, but I loved you once, remember? Maybe in this season, drunk and sentimental, I’m willing to admit a part of me, crazed and kamikaze, ripe for anarchy, loves still.”
— Sandra Cisneros, “One Last Poem for Richard” (via allloversbetray)