Open Letters From A Millenial

The ordinary life of a millennial living in the Philippines

[dillpaprikagirl]

The End

Despite everything, the best way to react is to stay calm. No need for harsh words and accusations. 

I choose peace.

The End

[dillpaprikagirl]

Standards

I lowered my standards

I was being too nice. Maybe I was programmed to be nice since I was a little girl

I learned that I don’t need to ask for the bare minimum - it needs to be given to me without me asking because that’s basic human decency

I learned that a person saying “nasanay ka na ha!”, when I was looking forward for my love languages to be met, is completely wrong

I took a risk, which clearly is the wrong move. It was the most stupid decision I did for what I thought was love when I was 24

It’s my fault from the get-go. Then he screwed up in the middle and end

[dillpaprikagirl]

Sad Girl

I never imagined - who will anyway - to be called ‘sad girl’ by someone I trusted the most, someone I treated as both best friend and lover. 

The label came upon when I was reaching out my hand to ask for help, for a shoulder to lean on again and again and again. Perhaps the comment came from a place of annoyance. He was annoyed that I tell the same of my sad stories over and over and over - and when I thought I’ve moved on already - I will come running to him over again. 

I asked for help from different people - family, friends, colleagues, health professionals. I was in the process of healing and I know I don’t deserve to be labeled as that, as a sad girl, because I know I am more than that. I am more than sad. I am not a SAD GIRL, I am a girl experiencing loneliness. If you understand, you know the difference.

Here are the lyrics from a musical with a song that impacted my life and I have yet to watch the film!

Have you ever felt like nobody was there? Have you ever felt forgotten in the middle of nowhere? Have you ever felt like you could disappear? Like you could fall, and no one would hear? Well, let that lonely feeling wash away Maybe there's a reason to believe you'll be okay 'Cause when you don't feel strong enough to stand You can reach, reach out your hand. And oh, someone will coming running And I know, they'll take you home. Even when the dark comes crashing through When you need a friend to carry you And when you're broken on the ground You will be found

I know in the future, I will find someone who understands mental health. Someone who won’t say “nasa tao lang yan” or “isipin mo nalang may mas naghihirap sayo”, someone who won’t get annoyed at me but direct me to the right path, gently and calmly. 

Someone not like him.

Or maybe, I will find someone who understands mental health and treat me better.

Or maybe, I will not find someone else but rather find my HEALED SELF because I know I don’t need a lover to heal me. 

[dillpaprikagirl]

#ThirdWorldProblems

When there’s a pandemic and you don’t have a car. 

It’s 2021. The year of the pandemic continues. 

We can’t see each other often, so I demand that we go out for dinner dates on the weekend. Due to him having relatives in the senior age group, he’s skeptical to go out with me unless he’s riding a car  - and not a jeepney - for fear of getting the virus and passing it to his family.

So I acted like an 8-year-old demanding for a toy at a shopping mall. Well, I guess I should just wait for this pandemic to end to have a date - which is, to be honest, the last you would think about when there’s a global health crisis.

[taylorswift]

I’ve always said that the world is a different place for the heartbroken. It moves on a different axis, at a different speed. Time skips backwards and forwards fleetingly. The heartbroken might go through thousands of micro-emotions a day trying to figure out how to get through it without picking up the phone to hear that old familiar voice. In the land of heartbreak, moments of strength, independence, and devil-may-care rebellion are intricately woven together with grief, paralyzing vulnerability and hopelessness. Imagining your future might always take you on a detour back to the past. And this is all to say, that the next album I’ll be releasing is my version of Red.

Musically and lyrically, Red resembled a heartbroken person. It was all over the place, a fractured mosaic of feelings that somehow all fit together in the end. Happy, free, confused, lonely, devastated, euphoric, wild, and tortured by memories past. Like trying on pieces of a new life, I went into the studio and experimented with different sounds and collaborators. And I’m not sure if it was pouring my thoughts into this album, hearing thousands of your voices sing the lyrics back to me in passionate solidarity, or if it was simply time, but something was healed along the way.

Sometimes you need to talk it over (over and over and over) for it to ever really be… over. Like your friend who calls you in the middle of the night going on and on about their ex, I just couldn’t stop writing. This will be the first time you hear all 30 songs that were meant to go on Red. And hey, one of them is even ten minutes long.

Red (Taylor’s Version) will be out November 19.

https://taylor.lnk.to/RedTaylorsVersion

[thegirlwhocrieswolf]

What lessons did you learn this year? xo Lang

Sea of Strangers

[dillpaprikagirl]

Keep Going

When parents become protective and try to control you, and your choice is the only thing that makes sense, keep going to what your heart tells you. Make your own choice and don't let it drown by the choices of others - even if they happen to come from your parents. When you want to quit your job and the reaction of your boss finding an empty seat scares you, go and be present at your next interview, go and start changing your life. When you know that love can hurt, that love is blind,that trying to revive a broken relationship has many uncalculated risks, go for it anyway. Go for a second chance at love. And when it has failed you, and when you hear the echoes of naysayers telling you "I told you so." Keep your head up high. They don't know what you've been through. They don't know the path you have trodden, and they, exactly, don't know the joy of having someone to love and be loved. And though it may have ended rather unfortunately, it's better than not going for it at all. It's better than not believing it can work. It's better than not trying at all. So keep going.

[bookmania]

The best thing for being sad is to learn something. That’s the only thing that never fails.

T.H. White, The Once and Future King (via bookmania)

[theunwrittenmelody]

The Unwritten Melody says:

First of all, thank you for taking the time to read my story. I am more than humbled to have caught your attention. Kate is a fictional character, just like all the other characters here but her story is not. Her story can be found in the eyes of any girl walking on...

[dillpaprikagirl]

If only emojis are available in Tumblr, this first sentence will be filled with it. It's a grand feeling to have this kind of digital conversation with you. This feeling wherein there's a person who thinks the same way. Yes! you are right, there are a lot of Kates in this world :), and maybe a little touch of Kate inside of us. Let this be the start (or continuation) of sharing bits of wisdom to all the other Kates, or the Sophies, and all other girls.

Until next story,

Bianca

[dillpaprikagirl]

LOOK: How Keira Knightley's OOTDs In 'Begin Again' Made Me Street-Style Obsessed

(Google images)

I met Director Jim Carney when I had to edit a movie review written by a colleague for our company's newsletter. It was suggested that I watch "Once" - the director's acclaimed film. Even before I got a copy of the much-talked about film, I had laid my eyes on Begin Again starring Mark Ruffalo, Keira Knightley, Adam Levine (!) and Hailee Steinfeld. [After watching this, I pretty much got interested to watch Once. ]

Begin Again is a story about a musical producer (Ruffalo) and singer- songwriter (Knightley) going through their low points in their lives. They have crossed each others paths and made wonderful music together. But will it be able to save their lives?

Aside from the crazy, and LSS soundtrack, my attention went to Greta's (Knightley) ootds!

(Pinterest)

This outfit transports me to Paris. A very laid back yet stylish style while riding a bike with a basket is a total dream come true. Boat shoes make this look A++.

(Pinterest)

Keira's statuesque figure added the oomph! factor. The color combinations make me dreamy for a while. My best bet is that this outfit can be worn during the Philippines' summer season. [Summer, come quickly].

(Pinterest)

I'll make my heart beat again for strappy sandals. I let go of wearing slip-on sandals the time I step foot in college; now, I see these trends rising again.

(Pinterest)

(Pinterest)

If I could marry the boyfriend jeans look, I would.

_________________________________________________________

To get more of Begin Again, listen to its soundtrack in Spotify.

[faultinourstarsmovie]

True love is worth the struggle.

[dillpaprikagirl]

This inspires me to start making gifs

[ruineshumaines]

Rafael Mantesso

[dillpaprikagirl]

Creative genius.

[glamour]

Zaney basket bags spotted at Kate Spade New York! *Dressed

[dillpaprikagirl]

Creativity from animals

[sefffrancisco-blog]

Here’s the mechanics of my photoblog giveaway for my 2nd year blog Anniversary Get a chance to win a Limited Edition Mac X Pedro Lourenco Lipstick (Ruby Shade), Airbrush make up service (Pampanga) and 2 rastaclats (Frio and Crooklyn)

Follow @sefffrancisco Follow @themakeupjunctionstudio Follow @jawdropperph

and caption the word “Cool-eyo” with a hashtag #styledelish2 

Winner will be annnounced this Aug, 27❤️

[dillpaprikagirl]

It's my friend seffie's 2nd-year blog anniversary. And to treat all of you, he's got a photoblog giveaway. I just joined. (fingers crossed I win).

[dillpaprikagirl]

An Open Letter To The Stranger I Met Again

We meet again.

I wouldn’t know if you will be able to come across this entry - this entry that will be drowned with all other entries in the digital world. I just want you to know that I am making this letter to tell you things I should’ve said last Friday night.

You said you couldn’t sleep so you called me up at 10 in the evening. You said I’ll meet you at the outskirts of the residence. You asked if I drink. “No” I answered.

I just want you to know that I was hesitant to leave late in the evening.  But a part of me wanted to see you. Again, my heart was beating so fast it hurt. Friends wished me luck.

It was a cold evening. I called my friend to keep me company while I was walking towards you. I have zero idea what to say or ask the moment I'll see your face. I keep reminding myself to just be myself. But what if you won’t like my real self? What if being myself won’t work out? What if it’ll be awkward? These questions lingered in my head as I exited the gates.

To be honest, I pretended not to notice the one and only car with hazard lights on. I pretended it weren't you. I pretended not to open the door. I hesitated – again. I wanted to turn my back – away from you. (Yes. It’s foolish)

“How are you?” That was the very first thing you asked. I was shy so I kept on staring at your dashboard while I speak. I just want you to know that I wanted to act natural. I wanted to feel comfortable on that seat. I wouldn’t know how you feel but we glanced at each other when one of us was not looking. I noticed how your voice changed. It’s still calm and quiet, though.

You parked outside the mall. It was like a scene in a movie. We munched on your favourite snack. (Guess what? Mine too). We talked about ourselves. I’m sorry there were bunch of complete silences. It was not an interview contrary to what I was doing when we first met. I just wished the words I said that night will be replaced by these:

“I want to watch a basketball game with you.”

“Let’s go see a movie next weekend.”

“I am really happy to meet you again.”

I just want you to know that my silence is the loudest voice you can ever hear. I just want you to know that my silence means “Go on, I am listening” or “I understand you.”

I want to end this with a happy note. So I’ll say thank you. You showed me the kind of person I wanted to be: mature, independent, smart and God-fearing. Thank you. My wish to meet you again came true.

I was enchanted to meet you again.

~B.

Note: This is a spin-off letter to 'An Open Letter To The Stranger I Fell In Love With' (I just realized that it was the most dorky, most cheesy letter I never thought I wrote.)

Credits: First photo was here, and the second here.

[dillpaprikagirl]

NormCore by biancadakis featuring Butter London

[dillpaprikagirl]

Summer Somewhere by biancadakis featuring drawstring bags