Scyther

Main acc where I just reblog stuffs 20 Always willing to talk about pokemon 💜

[dogboyscyther]

URL Change

hi hi hello im rebranding for cult purposes. going from apocalypsescyther to dogboyscyther <3

[frodo-of-the-nine-fingers]

my actual vampire hot take is that if you're going to be a 'vegetarian' vampire (a vampire that only drinks the blood of animals) you MUST have hunter education. i'm so sick of people being like oh well predator animals are mean and scary because they kill cute 'harmless' animals like NO they're crucial for the environment and if you're going to hunt animals for blood you still need to stick to regular people hunting guidelines and only hunt things that are in season and abide by your areas bag limits

[moral-autism]

vampire that did a detailed study about whether vampires can get prion diseases and concluded they can't and preferentially hunts animals with chronic wasting disease. and then incinerates the corpses.

[aksemmi]

vampire who is a woke predation abolitionist and so exclusively hunts predators, leaving primarily herbivorous and scavenging animals alone

[yaldabaothadeez]

"For miles around the foul creature's lair is nothing but barren wastes"

"because of The Curse?"

"Because of the deer and rabbits, fucking thing ate all the wolves"

[homunculus-argument]

I love browsing cover-up tattoo stuff when every once in a while there's someone asking "how do I cover up this unspeakably idiotic thing" and people are like "please do not cover that up, that's fucking amazing." You just have "shrimps is bugs" written on your leg now. That's your legacy.

[wario-hentai-hobbyist]

Have you seen that one weasel tattoo that someone was asking coverup advice for? One of the best tattoos I've seen.

[wario-hentai-hobbyist]

Found it!

[homunculus-argument]

It's so fucking beautiful I'm in tears. Laughing so hard I'm crying but what difference is that really.

[teathattast]

[orcarriagesthatwork]

I think about this cake every day

[tizzymcwizzy]

sorry for exposing your tags but this is hilarious

[microsuedemouse]

OP, I hope you don’t mind me making an addition:

When I turned 17, we ordered a cake at the grocery store for my party, as we’d done many times before. If you wanted something written on the cake you’d write it into a section of the order form. We requested, very simply, “Happy Birthday Courtney”. When we went to pick it up the day of the party, this is what we got.

The bakery employees had absolutely no explanation for this. The order form, attached to the box, very clearly did not contain any of those extra names. Whomever had done the writing was no longer in, so there was no one to ask how this had happened. The fact that the name ‘Juan’ is misspelled bewilders me to this day. (I’ve never seen ‘Miley’ without the E, either, but it’s believable that someone might spell it that way.) Did this cake slip in from an alternate universe where I’m one quarter of a set of Hispanic quadruplets? Dyslexic Hispanic quadruplets, maybe?

This cake became the focal point of my party. At least two of my friends regularly called me ‘Courtney Mily Jaun Pablo’ for years to come. My siblings and I still reference it sometimes, eleven years later. It is probably the funniest thing ever to occur at any birthday celebration of my life, and may well remain so for the rest of my days.

I love a botched cake.

[helenarth]

one time me and some pals spotted one of those big cookie cakes in a store. it was done up with red icing and little X's for kisses and in the middle it said

No One Like You

now, it took us a while to realise it meant "(there is) no one like you". at first, we all parsed it as a botched "no one like(s) you"

for ages after when we'd wind each other up we'd declare "NO ONE LIKE YOU ☹️👎"

[itseasytoremember]

I just feel like it's important to post the Sacred Texts

[shofarsogood]

[rockabillywife]

The water fountain when you’re thirsty af is definitely a top 5 place to publicly debase yourself

[wooteena]

crazy how there are only 2 hours of doing things every day before you keel over and die. if this werent normal id be worried

[caffefauwn]

Doom bringer

[mountaindiablo-blog]

today there was a “flash mob” set up by the seniors because it was their second to last day so they blasted the macarena over the loud speaker and did the dance in the main lobby but our headmaster knew about it so it wasn’t even funny but whilst walking past the elevator i found out why they really did this so called “flash mob”

it was a distraction

they put chickens in the elevator

[tipsykipsy]

This was wild because I forgot your high schoolers are called seniors and I thought you were talking about old folks

[grossaustralian]

“it was their second to last day”

[chest-nut-guy]

I love these bad bitches :)

[tomhoppusdelonge]

sorry for the mixed signals I don’t know what I want or what I’m doing mostly

[spiribia]

completely losing my mind at FIFTY dreepy

[lesbx]

do NOT separate them

[tailsbot98761]

I had to look this up

[laqueus]

let’s be a plush with baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby and baby

[wembleyfragglesarchive]

i’m losing my mind

[wembleyfragglesarchive]

STOP REBLOGGING THIS my phone is glitching an astronomical amount and I immediately knew the culprit was one of my tumblr posts gaining traction

[avatardoggo]

oh

GROOVE WITH ME BABY

[lizluvscupcakes]

Ya gotta have

✨⭐️ SOUL ⭐️✨

[voidgremlinguege]

DONT STOP ME NOW!

[minttttttttttttttttttttttttttt]

sorry but this video is like a parasitic species to me

[halimaidmf]

You think you can't be plural because there aren't any other voices in your head?

You already have one. Her name is tinnitus.

[aj-moment-deactivated20260416]

She's not nonverbal she knows how to say the letter e and loves to do it more than anything

[best-of-inspirobot]

[tearlessrain]

this is in perfect iambic meter and sounds like the first line of a weird poem

[tearlessrain]

Rule #2

Don’t ever hug a lobster when you see one on the street,

For decorum is essential when a lobster you must greet.

You may comment on the weather, compliment his choice of hat,

But crustaceans like their space if one should stop them for a chat.

Don’t ever hug a lobster when you’re strolling down the coast,

Simply nod and give a greeting, or a handshake at the most,

For a lobster’s first priority is formal social graces,

And one seemes over-familiar if a lobster one embraces.

Don’t ever hug a lobster when you meet one in the sea,

For a lobster’s spines and chitin make it difficult, you see,

And he might become self-conscious if you bring that fact to light,

So don’t ever hug a lobster, simply put, it’s impolite.

[valtsv]

basically the best thing any character can do is decide they don't want to be afraid anymore - in fact they never want to be afraid of anything ever again - and take action so drastic they fail to realise that this too is a decision motivated by fear. or to account for the Consequences of that.

[valtsv]

[with obvious perverted intent] hey. don't you want to release the safety catches on that character. don't you want to flip off all the switches holding them back and let the control rods go.