one way or another. together.
Never getting over this
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@dorritmartinapond
one way or another. together.
Never getting over this
I mean YEAH of course it was justified but I just miss my evil monster space grandpa okay
i think spending years on tumblr surrounded by the most critically unhinged minds on earth has impacted me in ways i dont even want to acknowledge. but on the plus side its all really funny
WHAT DO YOU AMERICANS MEAN WHEN A SHOW IS ON AT LIKE FUCKIN “8/7c” WHAT IS THAT????
We never switched over to metric timekeeping. The c stands for “Caw”, referring to how many times a majestic eagle has flown overhead and cawed that day. Sometimes the eagles are feeling sluggish, so the show could be on after either the 7th or 8th caw.
love being trusted with “you cant tell anyone this” conversations and nodding a lot and forgetting everything they told me like god intended and going down as a trustworthy individual while doing literally zero work of ill or good
Amnesic neutral
“I don’t like me sometimes, and I am me.”
Recommended course of action: give up [control to the THEA soul]
The Eye, watching Jonah Magnus struggle for 300 years to do its vague bidding, having to body-hop to avoid dying, needing to resort to bullets and a fucking pipe to get any murders done: …
Jon: Hey,
The Eye: HEY BABE ❤︎ YOU WANT ME TO SMITE SOME FUCKERS FOR YOU? ❤︎ ❤︎ YOU WANT SOME AVATARS FUCKIN DEAD? ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ I’LL DO IT, I WILL NOT HESITATE, YOU JUST SAY THE WORD ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎
The Eye: I love all of my chosen equally.
The Eye, earlier that day: I don’t care for Jonah.
Jon: is dangerous
Martin: pulls out engagement ring
tma fear ranking list because NONE of you have any taste
The Buried pros: dirt nap time! sometimes, being crushed is kinda comforting? cons: this does not help my claustrophobia overall: my gravedigger, sweating: how are you eating the dirt so fast?? 7/10
The Corruption pros: cool worms i guess? cons: literally everything else overall: -2/10, so gross
The Dark pros: very comforting at times. avatars of the dark probably get GREAT sleep cons: no animal crossing :( overall: kinda sexy ngl, 8/10
The Desolation pros: VERY sexy. cool fire motif and all that. sure you ruin peoples’ lives but you can just intentionally target rich people right? also free transition my skin is wax now babeyyy cons: literally none overall: 10/10 jude perry kiss me already
The End pros: when you’re dead, you don’t exist. cons: pretty much everything else overall: 7.8/10, too much death
The Eye pros: cool wikipedia shit, you can see through any kinda eyes, possibly body hopping? cons: making people relive their trauma is mean :( overall: the only fear i’d join just for the powers alone, 9/10
The Flesh pros: cool bone tricks, diy trans time cons: i like animals and don’t want them to die overall: makes me wanna become a vegetarian, 5/10
The Hunt pros: becoming an avatar of the hunt means you are instantly sexy. daisy tonner? sexy. julia montauk? sexy. trevor herbert, homeless old man dying of cancer? sexy. cons: all the fucking cops overall: just target rich people n stuff, 9/10
The Lonely pros: alone cons: alone overall: self isolation turned out kinda horrible -9/10
The Slaughter pros: murder can be kinda sexy sometimes cons: war is…. bad. overall: please stop doing wars, 3/10
The Spiral pros: fractals and stuff are interesting. the idea of uncertain truth is just inherently cool imo cons: makes me think of uzumaki which was great but so fucking terrifying overall: madness is inherently a little bit sexy, 8/10
The Stranger pros: i’m kind of a sucker for mannequins cons: mannequins also creep me the FUCK out overall: 7/10, i wish i was unknowable :(
The Vast pros: whats that one post about vast avatars and cheerful nihilism cons: eh goes on too long overall: nothing matters! 6/10
The Web pros: manipulation is kinda sexy cons: i do not like the spiders. overall: drop the spider motif and i’m on board, 7/10
the extinction pros: nothing, i do not respect this bitch and i never will cons: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA overall: you ever think we live in hell? -10/10
What the entity you align yourself with says about you:
the buried- you want to take a nap
the corruption- you were that weird kid at recess that always played with bugs
the dark- you havent outgrown your emo phase
the desolation- you are a lesbian
the end- either youre in your emo phase or you simp for oliver banks
the eye- you kin jon
the flesh- youre either a hipster or really really horny
the hunt- you had a creepypasta phase in middle school
the lonely- you have depression
the slaughter- you are punk
the spiral- you either want to fuck michael or helen
the stranger- youre a theatre kid
the vast- youre a bottom
the web- you just think spiders are neat
the extinction- you either have anxiety or really like wasteland, baby!
Conflicts the canonically queer characters on TMA are not forced to deal with during the show to progress their arcs:
Homo/bi/aphobic violence
Internalized homo/bi/aphobia
Better, more interesting conflicts TMA's queer characters face:
Getting laughed off of YouTube
Being excessively kidnappable
Everyone keeps saying you're too much of a people pleaser and that confuses your people-pleasing instincts?
Being pretty sure your ex has joined a cult
Really wanting revenge against the Regency-era clown that ate your brother
isn’t it all the same now?
(ID under the cut.)
Keep reading
jonah magnelias sitting in his bespoke baby seal leather office chair, grinding his teeth, knuckles white around his $300 ergonomic ruby-encrusted pen as he listens to one of his employees call him 'jimmy magma' but can't intervene because they can't know he has evil psychic powers
“ a rotten sanctuary of lonely companionship. ”
martin backwood’s just that “kitten thinks of nothing but murder all day” onion headline huh