dread wife montage

your scary wife who enjoys thunderstorms and scowling at cameras

[elliespectacular]

"you wouldn't want that in real life" yeah i know it's called playing pretend, try to keep up

[ahsoka-in-a-hood]

*walks up to a group children playing raptor* you wouldn't want to be chased by raptors in real life, i say smugly with my vast knowledge as an Adult.

[petikgeorgiev]

This video talks about a Splatoon weapon whose appearance resembles a pencil, but taken out of context it looks as if it's calling an actual pencil overpowered and I find that hilarious.

[blissoceanserrandgirl]

shit should NOT be stronger than the sword

[wolvas]

The Winter Palace is a palace in Orlais built on the ruins of ancient elven grounds in the city of Halamshiral.

[scullayann]

[human-pet-they]

closes my eyes and tries really hard to develop a "humiliating job interview" sexual fetish so my life becomes easier

[sludgebitch]

many of the horny posts on here are written as if the author knows of sex more as a theoretical framework than an act one can actually perform

[effemimaniac]

what's not theoretical is how I made your mum's bed frame work last night

[sludgebitch]

thank you for fixing her bed frame up. i was worried she wouldn't have a place to sleep since it stopped working. load off my mind. now i can finally spare the time to have sex with your mother

[pillowspace]

I've been doing this thing on youraislopbores.me today where I ask people what one of their favourite fanfics is, and every time somebody gives me a specific answer, I locate the fic and let the author know in the comments that when an anonymous stranger was asked for their favourite fic, they answered with this one

[pillowspace]

quickly looks left and right like i'm trying to find the assassin in a crowd

[mothermara]

remember to bury the dead with a phone, everyone. these days the ferry terminal at the river styx wants you to download a fucking app

[vamptits]

practicing radical acceptance about the fact that I'm always gonna be weird and awkward and a little difficult to be around. it's okayyyy to be weird as hell

[magemance]

And when you kiss me, I am happy enough-

[raynotraymond-deactivated202603]

Spot the different (IMPOSSIBLE!!!)

[cleaverdirmorganyam]

tony soprano could've built a meth empire but walter white couldn't have gone to therapy

[dogpuppy]

[targetedknowledge]

[macabro]

In his own ship, mind you.

[mantisliberationfront]

I think venus flytraps should be intelligent and ambulatory. I think they should get into the cupboards. I think they should purr when you pet them.

[prismatic-bell]

OP there is an entire Broadway musical explaining why you don’t want that

[bbcwhereareyou]

There’s a Broadway musical about them, too.

[cipheramnesia]

There’s gotta be a better way to learn about things than Broadway musicals.

[behindnightmaresanddreams]

the education system is in shambles but Broadway is as it always was.

[mortimermcmirestinks]

Apparently it’s doing a shitty job of educating anyway, though, because Audrey II very much is not, in fact, ambulatory, and very much does not, in fact, purr

[r0zeclawz]

you always see white americans talking about how they have "no culture" and it almost sounds like a harmless silly statement at first until you realize that leads into the very much harmful view of them being the default. the default character is a man who is white and lives in suburban america. and let me tell you you cant be thinking like that american baby