oh my lord- @queen-mabs-revenge you had to say dark hook appreciation week….
Cos I am all. fucking. for it.
Give me fics where Captain Swan are both still dark and while Emma’s trying, Killian is just being a right fucking dick.
Like, imagine them trying to have dinner with the family???
Emma’s like “We’re going to try and have dinner with my family tonight, okay?”
He just rubs his hands together “Splendid! Feasting with a table full of thieves and murderers. This will be worth attending.”
Everyone sitting uncomfortably around the loft dinner table, and on one side you’ve got two leather clad goths with one smiling politely and the other giving them all chillingly cold smiles.
And there’s awkward silences but Snow tries small talk like
“So, Killian… how are you?”
“Well I haven’t felt the urge to murder anyone today but it’s only 6 o clock. How about you, love? Felt the bloodlust since Cora’s demise?”
And David jumps in “Hey! Don’t talk to my wife like that.”
“Now now, Dave. That short temper might just ruin that holier than thou attitude of yours. It might just be your fall from grace.”
The cocky fucker is just calling everyone out and Regina is purposely sitting there quiet AF cos homie’s got way too much dirt on her.
“That’s it. I want you out of my house.”
“And here was me hoping to invite you out on a fishing trip. I thought we could go fillet some mermaids. You seemed rather keen on the sport in Neverland if I recall.”
Emma tries reasoning with him “killian. please.”
“Sorry, love! It seems i’m not in the mood for pleasantries tonight. Save me a slice of pie and I’ll see you back at home.” and he gives the charming’s an evil smirk before saying to her on a seductive voice “and we can do some of our own family bonding.” before giving her a soft kiss on the cheek before poofing out.
I just want loads of Dark Hook terrorising everyone around town by calling out their history. Can I have it? Please?
Like, poofing into Game of Thorns and scaring Moe, asking for two dozen of his finest dark red roses. And Moe wraps them up, stutters out a price and Killian’s like
“Really? And here was me thinking you’d have another daughter to barter with. Swan and I could do with a maid. Never mind. Do you take doubloons?”
Or fitting himself into the booth with Marco and Archie.
“Ah, it’s lovely to see such a solid friendship between you both. Although I do find it rather ironic that the cricket made wooden puppets out of the woodcarver’s parents. Have you carved them a little wooden house to live in? Perhaps a wooden casket. Give them a proper send off.”
And of course the two he terrorises the most are Gold and Regina. But this post would be way too fucking long if I delved into that….
germansingergirl
titsay
andulkaphoto
2087
snowghoul
jbbartram-illu
prguitarman
dailybridgerton
kianamaiart
