Sailing on a winedark open sea...

Patrick, He/Him, Bisexual Half-Deaf Disaster Artist

[reallyreallyreallytrying]

if newt gingrich replaced his "ging" with a "rient"... let's just say i'd be a lot more interested 🤤

[alivehouse]

?? on my post with a recording from a decommissioned satellite

[alivehouse]

Visit Original Link

this iswhat good pussy sounds like

[micro-usb-deactivated20230625]

[do-you-have-a-flag]

one of THE scariest comedy videos i've ever seen about to hit a milestone

[n0seferatu]

big pharma will try to sell u $20 cold medicine like spicy ramen doesnt cost like a dollar a pack and orgasms are free

[n0seferatu]

damn british people cant cum..... this is so sad.......

[n0seferatu]

big chemist will try to sell you £20 paracetamol like beans dont cost like a quid a can and havin a wank costs fock all

[bargarean]

[bargarean]

reblog my post boy

[chaumas-deactivated20240115]

played sims 4 for the first time and one of the married cis men had a desire to try for baby with his cis husband. i accidentally pinned it and could not unpin it. trying for baby is physically impossible. I tried to use cheats to give him a viable womb in create a sim but it wouldn’t let me do so retroactively. so I thought, maybe if they adopt the want for pregnancy will go away, and had them adopt a toddler daughter. but then the try for baby desire did not go away. since they now had an unwanted adopted child I tried to remove the toddler from the household, thinking this would send her back into the ether. it did not. instead she wanders the neighborhood like a feral cat. i thought the social worker would come and take her back so someone else could adopt her, but I guess there is no social worker in sims 4. so now the neighborhood is haunted by a smelly miserable baby that has no home but cannot die and everyone who sees her is uncomfortable. fucking omelas scenario.

[chaumas-deactivated20240115]

no one is feeding her but every time she gets hungry she simply produces a carton of milk out of the ether and drinks it

[gremlin-pattie]

OP— do ctrl+shift+C and type “testingcheats true” and then “cas.fulleditmode” into the bar, then go into CAS and change one of the sims to be able to get pregnant. mpreg is possible ALWAYS

[chaumas-deactivated20240115]

thanks. the womb installation worked.

[adrenalinevan]

I'm sorry, this was dune mpreg the whole time and you never thought to mention? Iconic.

[chaumas-deactivated20240115]

it wasn’t relevant to my journey

[girlsaliva]

i want someone who will sit on a rooftop with me at 3 am and shave their head while i shave my head and then hotglue the hair to the roof so the roof will have hair

[bonusocean-blog]

Stop listening to folk punk

[blackheart-biohazards]

😈 You are not bound by the Hays code.

😈 You are allowed to have evil characters who are not punished by the narrative by the end of the story.

😈 You are allowed to have evil characters who win.

😈 You are allowed to have evil characters who make evil look fun and cool.

😈 You are allowed to make your fun, cool evil character the protagonist.

😈 You are allowed to glorify, romanticize and eroticize evil characters and villainous acts.

😈 You are not obligated to teach your audience a moral lesson.

[dovesndecay]

[micro-usb-deactivated20230625]

[micro-usb-deactivated20230625]

my friends hate this video so much i don’t even have to repost it in discord anymore i’ll just be in a voice call and go “wouldn’t it be crazy if the joker could beatbox” and they all tell me to go kill myself

[rambrandt-the-painter]

"australian wildlife is so scary!"

Say fucking sorry to him right now or I'll fucking lose it

[imadhatt3r]

I finally got the opportunity to share this amazing tweet I have saved ages ago

[a-book-of-creatures]

The Australian lungfish really said “:3”

[rumwik]

Strange haunted photo where Winifred looks like she's a painting

[needs-more-hugs]

I have placed her in a more fitting setting

[bisexual-engineer-girl]

For the first time in my tenure on tumblr, it's "THAT'S A PHOTOGRAPH?" and not "THAT'S AN OIL PAINTING?"

[cungadero]

i hate viruses so fucking much. literally getting attacked by a fucking shape. a concept. consumes no energy. responds to no stimuli. its only existence is to fuck with you. like fuck offf

[thrice-the-nobling]

prev's tags are too good not to save

[bee-a-ts]

the bi/pan alliance and the aro/ace alliance in my city did the funniest possible thing for pride today

[herainsorcia]

[fox-bright]

That is DIABOLICAL museum design, A++, no notes

[desert-palm]

[captain-acab]

Catch me being a modern-day cyberpirate screaming up alongside you on the 405 in my mad max car with half a bitcoin farm's worth of RAM in the backseat as I hack your Bitchless Towyota™ device and steal the boat you're towing right off the back bumper of the tesla your dad bought you

As i roar into the sunset you have to swerve* to avoid the small flotilla of hacked Towyota devices trailing behind me

(*in fact you do not swerve because you're on hands-free driving to go along with your hitch-free towing so you can only watch helplessly as your tesla mistakes your stolen booty for a small child and accelerates crashing into it and killing you instantly)

[mevil]

[wizardshark]

99% of queer discourse stops right before they define the true difference between bisexual and pansexual!

[saspitite]

FOR THE LAST FUCKING TIME

BISEXUALS GROW FROM THE GROUND

PANSEXUALS GROW FROM THE CEILING