DuplicitlyWistful

Artist + AO3 author + Art Historian + Cat Mom (Ren) she/they Ask me about oriental rugs

[duplicitlywistful]

~(A Lot) About Me~

AO3: DuplicitlyWistful FF.N: DuplicityWistful (Note the “L” change) Hi! I’m Ren (they/them or she/her). 18+/Minors DNI. I write exclusively on AO3, but my content is still available on FF.N. A bit about me: I currently live in the US with my 3 cats, though I am planning a big move in 2027 and I may go dark for a period because of this. I am currently listening to a lot of Ethel Cain and Phoebe Bridgers! I don’t like to be super pedantic about labels, but I identify both as bi and ace, though I typically just say that I’m queer. I am a cellist and I also play a handful of video games on occasion (sims, Stardew, BG3, Pathologic 2, Cyberpunk 2077). I am big into art and art history, with interests in pre- and post-contact Latin American art and the northern Renaissance movement in Europe, and I know a lot about oriental rugs! I am extremely interested in the effects of cultural exchanges, both positive and negative. Straight up, I do kind of hate antiquity/classics, and this blog is not a safe place for any fans of Leonardo da Vinci (jk… unless…). I write fics for a variety of fandoms, but primarily Harry Potter, with a focus on Remadora. I also write original works, but I’ve changed my mind a lot on whether or not to post my WIPs because of theft, as I’d like to publish someday. I don’t actually read a lot of fanfiction anymore! (I’m primarily into reading fiction at the moment, as I am taking a break from academic writing/reading. Nothing against it, I love the community, I just get super busy nowadays.) However, in terms of fandom, I think I’d have to list: HP, Twin Peaks, YOU (Caroline Kepnes, book + show), Pathologic (1 + 2)... probably others that I can't remember off the top of my head. I read a lot of books and watch a lot of movies, but I tend to keep my writing within Remadora. In terms of my own writing: I have diagnosed chronic illnesses and a learning disability, and because of this, a lot of my writing does center disability to some capacity. I am a very politically minded person, and this heavily affects what I write (primarily because I find a lot of catharsis in writing about the world I live in). I do not use AI nor do I support it. I tend to lean more towards writing more slowburn fics and I tend more towards writing Mature as opposed to Explicit (personal preference). I also tend to write extremely long chapters, so heads up! I’m trying to update more frequently to make sure the ball stays rolling, but the chaos of like does get in the way a lot of the time. Currently, my biggest project is Prisoners of War, a HP/Remadora darkfic about Tonks + Teddy being kidnapped by a cult of werewolves lead by Fenrir Greyback. I am writing companion pieces within the series, “The Years of the Maulings,” which are/will be labelled based on what order they should be read in. (M)

Here is a post indexing the OC characters of that series! I’m currently going back and rewriting, “As He Picked Up His Hammer and Saw,” a blind!Remus fic from FF.N. I am also working on rewriting an old fic from another account, “A Single Grain of Sand,” which is a multiverse fic about Teddy trying to find his parents across different universes. (Both Teen and Up) I have a really long, slowburn* HBP Remadora fic that I... sometimes work on, called "A Little Possible to Live In." I have one Remadora fic on hold, “The Mnemosyne Project,” which is an amnesia darkfic. (Both M) I have a YOU crackfic about the gambling app, Kalshi, called "Will Guinevere Beck Get a Date? YES NO" (E) that I am very proud of, and some other random stuff on my AO3. I have 2 Remadora fics that are short and planned for the future (one timeloop, one pseudo-teacherXstudent). I also have another YOU oneshot in the works. Hoping to get around to those in 2027! Asks always open about anything whatsoever! *debatable

[duplicitlywistful]

Not to continue to Blorbo Post about my OCs but I’m writing and I think Fiona should get an iPhone. I don’t think that would solve all of her problems, but it would probably solve most of them (barring she doesn’t immediately get pissed off at someone on twitter and smash her phone to a million pieces).

[freakoutgirl]

There are too many sects of Christianity. How the hell am I supposed to know what an Episcopal is.

[duplicitlywistful]

Trying to write but my cats are legitimately freaking me the fuck out. I’ve been sitting here for hours, distracted, because the middle cat and the youngest are DYING to be together. They cry out for one another when the youngest has to go away. But when they’re together? They aggressively beat the fuck out of each other until the youngest is hissing and growling and squealing.

So then I have to get up and figure out what the hell is going on and separate them, only for them to immediately run back to each other and act like best friends. The youngest will actually “hide” in a spot the middle can’t quite reach and use that as a warfare tactic, reaching out and smacking her sister from a position she cannot be smacked back from. Oh but when the youngest does get smacked back? The most heart wrenching cries come out of her mouth and I have to get up again to make sure everyone is okay.

The eldest is fine btw, she was completely unbothered and napping in the other room.

The youngest had to go to bed because she kept growling and freaking out and I can hear her crying, begging to be let out, and the middle cat is crying back to her from the hallway 🙄

[blessyouhawkeye]

was talking about my thesis with my aunt and i was explaining to her that because i'm doing an mfa in creative writing my thesis is writing a novel and i'm supposed to have a first draft by the end of the summer. and she said "wow! and i mean i'm sure that's fun for you?" and when i said yes it is she said "that's great. because if it were me i'd kill myself." which was a slightly nuts thing to say in a church waiting for my grandmother's funeral to start but i respect her honesty

[duplicitlywistful]

WIP Wednesday

Thank you for tagging me, @ri--rina!! <3 I said I wasn't going to do Remus interludes and I lied oops. Beginning of chapter 9 of Prisoners of War:

Remus was clutching his arm. The cut that spanned the back of his arm, wrist to elbow, had slowed its bleeding, but now the adrenaline was gone, and he was left with searing pain. He didn’t see the point in waiting in line at St. Mungo’s. It was humiliating every time, to have to check in just to go to the same place that was always expecting him. But then again, it was humiliating to go there at all. When it was finally his turn, he spoke in a low voice with the witch at the desk, who wrinkled her nose at him and scooted her chair back when she saw he was dripping with blood. The others in the atrium gave him the same look when they heard where he was going. The old Werewolf Ward on the first floor had been reopened due to demand, renamed The Clinical Research and Treatment Ward for Lycanthropes, as if somehow giving it a more polite name changed anything. It was fairly empty, but it was also the middle of the night on a waning crescent, though all werewolves now had to be treated here, regardless of injury. Healer Thane met him at the entrance and wrapped Remus’s arm in a towel to stop the dripping. “What was it this time?” He asked, leading him to a bed. Remus carefully pried off his coat and unfastened the button on his sleeve which was now likely ruined anyway. He didn’t bother coming up with convincing lies anymore, though he knew it would still end up on his file, which would likely have the Ministry’s eyes on it. “I… fell down the steps in front of my house.” “Really?” Healer Thane feigned surprise, gloving his hands to examine the cut. “Well, it’s very clean. I would’ve thought you had done it with garden shears. Or Diffindo.” “Right, yes, well I was holding the shears, you see,” Remus said sarcastically. He hadn’t caught the face of the man who had done it. The werewolves in Greyback’s pack were getting more confident, but that was mostly because no one else had bothered to track their movements as closely as Remus was. But Remus’s choice to go was more due to the opportunity than anything. Even he had grown negligent in watching their movements as close as he once had, but he suspected that if he were correct, they were going to have a raid close enough to Hogsmeade that they were a threat. And he had been correct. 

[duplicitlywistful]

Full stop it’s been so long since I’ve looked at the canon material, I thought the “Teddy had blue hair as a baby” thing was fandom. I thought it came from outside material or the epilogue. Babies can’t even see color, and I was just about to give JKR the benefit of the doubt, but apparently this has been known since the 70s.

Like not to cinemasins this or anything, I think the fan art of baby Teddy is adorable. If anything, I understand the narrative purpose of showing him changing his hair different colors and I feel stupid for writing in my fic that it took him 6 months to figure out color, but damn.

[helpmeimblorboing]

Getting emotional over blorbos from my Head again. God I can’t believe the author (me) would do that to them. He’s (I’m) such a dick. I hate him.

[duplicitlywistful]

“Do you get Déjà vu?”

[duplicitlywistful]

I’m at that point in writing where I’ve hit a problem so big I could just expedite the entire plot of this fic months ahead of what it’s supposed to be. I could cut out like half the chapters and having the ending happen here. All because I could 100000% see the main character making a stupid joke about herself that she doesn’t know she isn’t supposed to make because she has absolutely no reason to believe that making that joke would hurt her in any way. Like I’m trying to talk my way out of her doing this and She Would Do That. She would make that stupid joke and the dominoes would fall over and months of in-world plotting that I’ve done would be crushed in an evening because no one would think, “hey, don’t tell that guy this information,” because why would they think that? Why would they think that????????

It doesn’t even matter if the other characters have good or bad motives either. Either they mean well by passing it along or they want to hurt her and pass it along, which either way, the plot is fucked! These guys whole character is, “yeah we’re loyalists who don’t hide secrets.” They have no reason to believe that this information would fuck up my plot outline because they don’t know there’s a plot outline!!!

Like… the problem isn’t “oh I don’t know how to not write this stupid joke in” it’s “now that it’s in my head I can’t figure out how to make her shut her mouth and not ruin my entire fic because for all intents and purposes, SHE DOESN’T KNOW!!! If she doesn’t know, then what is guiding her decision making process?!” 😭😭😭

[duplicitlywistful]

Upcoming POW chapter: “Nymphadora Tonks gets shot by a sniper for opening her mouth because if she says this one quirky #relatable joke, it will have a greater impact on the plot than her getting shot with An Actual Gun.”

[duplicitlywistful]

I’m at that point in writing where I’ve hit a problem so big I could just expedite the entire plot of this fic months ahead of what it’s supposed to be. I could cut out like half the chapters and having the ending happen here. All because I could 100000% see the main character making a stupid joke about herself that she doesn’t know she isn’t supposed to make because she has absolutely no reason to believe that making that joke would hurt her in any way. Like I’m trying to talk my way out of her doing this and She Would Do That. She would make that stupid joke and the dominoes would fall over and months of in-world plotting that I’ve done would be crushed in an evening because no one would think, “hey, don’t tell that guy this information,” because why would they think that? Why would they think that????????

It doesn’t even matter if the other characters have good or bad motives either. Either they mean well by passing it along or they want to hurt her and pass it along, which either way, the plot is fucked! These guys whole character is, “yeah we’re loyalists who don’t hide secrets.” They have no reason to believe that this information would fuck up my plot outline because they don’t know there’s a plot outline!!!

Like… the problem isn’t “oh I don’t know how to not write this stupid joke in” it’s “now that it’s in my head I can’t figure out how to make her shut her mouth and not ruin my entire fic because for all intents and purposes, SHE DOESN’T KNOW!!! If she doesn’t know, then what is guiding her decision making process?!” 😭😭😭

[duplicitlywistful]

I tried to write down a new reason why she Would Not Do That and guess what I came up with? ANOTHER REASON SHE WOULD SAY IT.

[duplicitlywistful]

I’m at that point in writing where I’ve hit a problem so big I could just expedite the entire plot of this fic months ahead of what it’s supposed to be. I could cut out like half the chapters and having the ending (THE ending would be completely gone but A Ending would) happen here. All because I could 100000% see the main character making a stupid joke about herself that she doesn’t know she isn’t supposed to make because she has absolutely no reason to believe that making that joke would hurt her in any way. Like I’m trying to talk my way out of her doing this and She Would Do That. She would make that stupid joke and the dominoes would fall over and months of in-world plotting that I’ve done would be crushed in an evening because no one would think, “hey, don’t tell that guy this information,” because why would they think that? Why would they think that????????

It doesn’t even matter if the other characters have good or bad motives either. Either they mean well by passing it along or they want to hurt her and pass it along, which either way, the plot is fucked! These guys whole character is, “yeah we’re loyalists who don’t hide secrets.” They have no reason to believe that this information would fuck up my plot outline because they don’t know there’s a plot outline!!!

Like… the problem isn’t “oh I don’t know how to not write this stupid joke in” it’s “now that it’s in my head I can’t figure out how to make her shut her mouth and not ruin my entire fic because for all intents and purposes, SHE DOESN’T KNOW!!! If she doesn’t know, then what is guiding her decision making process?!” 😭😭😭

[duplicitlywistful]

Pissing myself off with my own writing.

“Oh, that’s not good, because that’s a disabled/POC/ other marginalized identity character and they are having their agency stripped from them! I can’t post that, someone is going to think I’m not aware of sterotypes and they’ll think it’s a blind spot in how I see people in the world!”

And the story I’m writing is called, “The Story About How Marginalized People Get Screwed Over by The System In Fucked Up Ways That Makes You Think.”

And the character in the scene is like, “yeah I’m really unhappy with this thing that is happening to me right now, boy oh boy, do I wish I had a say in this matter :/.”

[duplicitlywistful]

Okay so… I already made one vague post about how there are SO many POW/Maulings ocs and it made me think “oh I should probably make an index because we are approaching territory with a ‘lot’ of OCs being introduced.” This is that index.

Link to the fic series here!

Index:

Fiona Albright—Young witch, bitten, working under the command of Fenrir Greyback. She is the primary caretaker over the old cabin, usually in charge of bringing supplies. Openly hostile, prone to violence, and very immature. Leader of Outpost Soracte, which has been designated for elderly, disabled, and non-combative members of the cult.

Douglas McGregor—Unusually old wizard, bitten, working under the command of Fenrir Greyback in some sort of administrative role. A less frequent caretaker over the cabin, usually in charge of the more “gruesome/unwanted” labor, such as teaching hunting for and cleaning animals for cooking. Cold, blunt, but very honest, and has some form of control over Greyback himself.

Kateryna “Kat” Kovaleva—Former occupant of the cabin (deceased, 1998). A muggle werewolf who was incredibly close, professionally, romantically, and sexually, to Greyback. An immigrant from Ukraine, Kat came in search of cancer treatment and was bitten under the promise that the transformation itself would prolong her life. Results unclear. One of the main architects behind building the cult’s infrastructure, though encountered Remus Lupin in his attempts to persuade people to join the Order. She thought he was daft, but they had a mutual respect for one another.

The Nine Children (I said you don’t need to remember them and you don’t, which is why I’m including last names here and not in the text):

William Cochrane—6 years old. 1999. Quiet.

Lauren Marshall—5 years old. 2000. Bit Tonks before her first transformation, but didn’t break the skin. Had bad transformations and disappeared quickly.

Eric Foster—8 years old. 2000. Asked questions about the process and went silent after his transformation.

Noah Merrick—9 years old. 2000. Capable, brought news to the cabin regarding “The Maulings” and his father worked in the Beasts and Beings department.

Alfie Bauer—probably 4 years old. 2001. Died shortly after his arrival, caused from his bite being on his trapezius muscle leading to him bleeding out. Buried in the clearing with wildflowers marking his grave.

Rami Shafiq—8 years old. 2002. Sweet and playful, but was a germaphobe and was unaccustomed to the cabin due to his pure blood family’s lifestyle.

Paige Tribble—7 years old. 2002. Sweet, but very clingy and refused to leave.

Joesph Sterling—7 years old. 2002-2003. Son of an anti-werewolf Prophet editor. Spoiled, but very scared.

Oliver “Ollie” Belby—9 years old. 2003. Arrives a month before Teddy’s faith birthday. Son of the creator of the Wolfsbane potion. From a family full of sisters, he’s one of the more socially competent and mature kids, though he seems to be the most aware of the politics surrounding The Maulings.

Milly—Young witch with Down Syndrome, currently living in Soracte under Fiona’s protection. Accidentally bitten as a child, she was (according to Fiona) sold to the werewolves to make her disappear as to not bring further shame to her pure blood family. Her primary occupation is taking care of the dogs within the camp. In March of 2003, she was injured during a transformation and then splinched by Fiona during transport.

Healer Thane—Healer at the Clinical Research and Treatment Ward for Lycanthropes.

Anselme Moreau—recently appointed lawmaker for the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, seated on Wizengamot. His campaign was funded by anti-werewolf families and he ran on the promise of cracking down of werewolf violence.

“The Butcher”—Muggle doctor, middle aged woman, operating (quite literally) within Greyback’s cult.

The four angels from Tonks’s dream mysterious women from Tonks’s healing: one with a wand, one in a white coat, one with long black hair, and one called “Gwen” who brought potions.

That’s all for now! Check back after a new chapter of POW goes up, I may update… or update preemptively with extra information 👀.

[duplicitlywistful]

“Why does my big sister hate me? She hisses at me every time I come over and invade all of her personal space and boundaries………..” hmm. Much to ponder.

[rivercreature]

whittled wolves

[duplicitlywistful]

Brain dumping about WIPS:

I think for laughs I’m going to go back to SGOS and AHPUHHAS and do a chapter each there today (maybe? Might not post if they’re THAT bad). I’ve been thinking about this for a while but idk I’ve been struggling to drag myself to my computer lately. Problems:

-AHPUHHAS: This fic feels like it has a “doomed ending” to me. Not because it is actually doomed at the end but because I was running out of steam for this fic a LONG time before I was ready to admit it.

-SGOS: Okay so this is an issue that has plagued literally every single thing I have ever written forever and identifying it has done NOTHING to fix it. I am completely incapable of writing characters finding out about things that are impossible and coming to terms with them. Do you want to guess what this fic is about? Multiversal travel! Oh my god. It’s such an interesting idea but I wish anyone but me would write it. If I had money and no shame, I’d hire a ghost writer because I know my ideas are good but they’re impossible to write.

POW is… kind of happening atm. Combining two chapters like this was the right decision and I don’t think it’ll be too long (word count wise) but by the nature of that, it’s going to take a little while.

The knightXlady/courtly love AU (dubbing it LEDNEDL or LEDN, either way) is probably not going to happen this week the way I wanted. The plot has grown and expanded and due to the style of writing, it’s just not easy to get through, but we’re getting there!

TMP is scratching at the back of my brain right now, begging to be worked on. I’m worried it’ll be identical to POW, but I might take another glance at it soon if it doesn’t stop bugging me.

Playing around with the Timeloop AU but it’s still on the backburner, but stay tuned 👀

The studentXteacher AU is not in the works yet.

ALPTLI is still on hold which does in fact piss me off.