Irl Fantasy Dwarf

Dwarfposting when the urge arises. We do rad shit here and share a love for all things except bigots. Nothing but love and respect for irl little folks

[dwarfsona]

Life hack:

Red wine mixed with cola flavored cannabis drink.

It’ll make you twist your mustache and think of various precious stones

[dwarfsona]

I’ve discovered that I have a keen hatred of the stair machines at the gym. Nothing like the mountain halls of old. 3/10 exercise machine

[dwarfsona]

Lending my earthworking expertise to the urban gays to help build barriers around police stations in record time

[jame7t]

if I got carried away by the harpies I would accept my fate because I respect women

[whitepeopletwitter]

[the-only-useful-lesbian]

I do not remember liking this, but clearly past me has good taste

[fangirltofangod]

I’m experiencing such joy thinking about how excited youd get when you hear the sound of hooves coming down your street - it’s the post!! It’s coming!!

Like an icecream truck response but for mail

[somethingusefulfromflorida]

“I do declare, I have me here a parcel for ya.”

[ukulelekatie]

[hyrude]

i was in a thrift shop the other day and they were playing the most unsettling variations of normal christmas music, culminating in this rendition of the 12 days of christmas except it was like 12 guys all singing over each other and going “no!” and interrupting the lyrics with random other phrases until they deadass just started singing 5 golden rings to toto’s africa. can anyone confirm that this is a real song and not that i stroked so hard i astral projected into a universe where everything is somehow worse than it is here

[flaminggoosememe]

https://youtu.be/2Fe11OlMiz8

I remember listening to this in grade school. I am going to go get some Chinese food.

[pizzopaps]

this is what my anxiety attacks sound like

[tchrgleek]

Oh I needed this laugh this evening. Thank you so much.

[honeysucklepink]

In case anyone didn’t want to leave Tumblr and just hit “play”

[mikkeneko]

Tumblr are you OK? It’s december and you’ve hardly even touched your “twelve days of Christmas by straight no chaser”

[dwarfsona]

My natural muscle and stocky build astound and frustrate my friends on the rare occasion that I hit the gym with them

[dwarfsona]

I hate capitalism, but man do I love hitting rocks with hammers and chisels

[dwarfsona]

I too yearn for the mines on occasion. The difference between you and I is that you’ll stop when you’re tired, but I will forget to drink water for hours on end in the tireless pursuit of glorious discovery. We are not the same.

[dwarfsona]

People always talk about bringing cloaks and long coats back into fashion, but I don’t see ANY of them talking about long coats with armor on them.

Bring back brigandine. Put bracers on your jackets. Live a little

[dwarfsona]

I feel the sudden urge to trudge along