JVL
we're not kids anymore.
todays bird
Three Goblin Art
PR's Tumblrdome
oozey mess
Peter Solarz
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
#extradirty
i don't do bad sauce passes
shark vs the universe
$LAYYYTER
trying on a metaphor
Love Begins
Not today Justin
almost home
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
art blog(derogatory)
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taylor price
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@echosblanketfort
My "You Belong Here" is getting notes again, so i figured I'd make this.
If you see this and you have time, please go to tumblrs feedback page and tell them to stop terming Black people and trans women 🙏
please tell them that you see the way they treat trans women and Black people while allowing hate blogs to stay active. We are stronger together so let's stand together 💪
I think the term "chronically online" can be a problem because a lot of disabled and otherwise housebound people depend on the Internet for almost all of their social interactions. Criticizing people for how they can socialize as pack animals can really suck, and I actually don't think being online all the time is inherently a bad thing.
The problem comes when you're pickling yourself in discourse and become convinced you have Uniquely Correct insight to how people in the world are acting when you only interact with a small amount of people. Because then you're just talking with authority about things you don't have much experience in and often end up feeling hopeless about things when there is a lot of hope to be found.
idk what the point of this post is but I wish "chronically online" and "touch grass" weren't used as insults and I also wish people were more thoughtful about their internet use
@rippledragon linked this to me and a good time is being had.
DM: okay you’re face to face with Goliath and he’s like twice your size
David:... I throw a rock at him with my slingshot
DM: are you sure? This is a fig-
David: I throw a rock at him with my slingshot.
David: *rolls a 20*
DM:...
DM: okay so you kill Goliath
this is so much funnier if you assume the DM is God.
This is how I'm gonna explain dnd to people from now on
i love when parents used to say you’ll understand when you’re an adult and then you become an adult and you’re like ohhh i do understand. i understand that you were a weird fucking cunt. i know this because now i am a weird fucking cunt too. and i still don’t treat kids that way
(Eric Satie, as quoted in John Cage's "Silence")
The Woke Left wants an E.T. reboot and they want him to have a boyfriend
E.T. stands for Estrogen Testosterone
these are getting weird
I am a person who was chronically terrified of being alive for most of her life, and I still find that most advice and ideas on how to manage "anxiety" are the same: Ignore discomfort.
If you are scared of something, do it anyway. If you feel anxious, you must do things that make you scared. Get out of your comfort zone. Tell your fears they are wrong. Act as though you are not afraid. Ignore, ignore, ignore, silence, silence, silence.
It hurt me-- it is a horrible psychological weight to carry for a child to be certain that she will suffer unbearably over and over and that she will never deserve sympathy or compassion for it-- but it is also fundamentally incurious and disconnected.
If your body expresses something that is inconvenient or hard to understand, just silence and ignore it, because the things the body wants are wrong and the things the body communicates are false.
Look, I got to thinking about this when reading scientific articles about nutrition.
So much research is conducted about why people eat foods that are Wrong and Bad. But the research is conducted around an already-known truth, like a tree that has grown around a metal fence: people eat wrong and bad food because people like pleasure and avoid discomfort, and "bad" foods are pleasurable whereas healthy foods are not.
I feel a hole big enough for the wind to howl through: the joyful table, the raw ecstasy of staining my fingers with raspberries in the thicket, the peaceful bubbling of soup on the stove, salsa canned from vegetables in our garden. Stir-fried wild mushrooms, pawpaws messily devoured in the woods, the fragrance of soil and green and growing things. Curry powder. Smoked paprika. Ginger. Allspice. Garlic and onions hitting a hot pan. Nourishment. Connection. Caretaking. Safety. Pleasure. Pleasure.
Why does nobody ask, What is the goodness of food? What makes food good? Why does nobody say, Let's explore and study that goodness. Let's understand it deeply. Let's investigate the pleasure we feel, the condition of satisfaction of the things our bodies crave and need, the sense of belonging and interconnectedness that is present when good food is shared among friends. What does it mean to be nourished? To be satisfied? To feel peacefulness and comfort in the act of eating?
Comfort must be one of the least understood things in the world. No one is curious about the secrets it may hold.
Why was I burdened with the obligation to get over my fear and never encouraged to explore what would it mean to feel safe?
The goal of the therapy and medications was clear, to get my fear to a manageable enough level that I could "function" "normally." Safety was not part of it, the feeling or the reality.
The physiological functions and maladaptive thought patterns of fear were exhaustively discussed and explained to me. They only talked to me about the fear. How to ignore it. How to dominate it. How to force the physiological process of it to stop. How to manage it. How to understand and confound its patterns.
No one talked to me about safety. How it unfolded in the body. What it felt like. How to recognize when I was feeling it.
It was an attitude of profound incuriosity. I was never prompted or encouraged to ask, and no one else in the world seemed to ask: What does it mean for a person to feel safe? What does it feel like when I am safe? What things create that condition of safety? What are my safety needs? How is safety felt in my body? What can my body tell me about what I need to feel safe?
It is this flat, dull insistence that forcing oneself into what causes pain and discomfort automatically orients one in the direction of growth, whereas comfort and pleasure provide no information or guidance.
It is assumed that we all have abundant access to our comfort zones and abundant indulgence in pleasure, and therefore it is impossible that our knowledge of these things might be lacking.
Beautiful stop motion animation by CliffCreativity
I would actually go as far as to say that MOST abuse is unintentional. I think most people will go through their lives without ever experiencing intentional abuse. People are abusive because they're selfish, because they're stressed, because they care more about what society thinks they should do than the impacts of their actions on their children and partners, because they think what they're doing is correct, because they've made it make sense in their own heads, because they think they can fix their victims, they think they can fix their relationships, they think they can stop you from leaving, they think they can make you a better partner to them, they think that means you need to do what they want. We've sort of constructed mental illness in a way that doing this shit to other people counts as a form of mental illness because it is anti social behavior in the literal sense— it is behavior that causes social harm.
I don't say any of this to excuse it. I think everyone needs to be more aware of this because if you think abuse has to be intentional you will never realize you are capable of abusive behavior. You will never realize you are being shitty to the people you love, because YOU know what you mean, YOU know you don't mean any harm. But you're doing harm. You need to pay attention to the impact you have on other people, and you need to do it all the time, Especially when you feel least capable of doing so. Sorry! You live in a society. Get your head out of your ass.
This perspective is so important. Also related is the fact that most abuse happens in relationships that have at least some degree of mutually-abusive behavior.
I.e. it is rare that one person acts abusively towards another and the other never acts abusively back.
Not all abuse happens in a relationship where you can clearly label one person the abuser and one the victim. Some relationships, yes, but I do believe that these relationships are a minority of the ones in which abuse happens.
Look, look, ok i get, i get where you're coming from. If you think of abusers as a separate category you cant possibly be in you are more likely to do abusive things. Gotcha.
The rhetoric in this post is insane and incredibly dangerous. Sure, most abusers dont think 'I'm going to abuse my partner!' but saying most abuse is unintentional???? Miss me with that.
Abusive behaviors are ABSOLUTELY done with intent. The intent may be to scare, control, coerce. Whatever it is. But it is absolutely done with intent. Sure maybe the person doing it doesn't think 'oh I'm doing abuse on purpose' but that doesn't matter. IT'S STILL DONE WITH INTENT. Spreading the idea tha most abuse is done accidentally could cause so so so much harm.
So many people in abusive relationships think things like 'well he didn't scare me on purpose' or 'he didn't break my things on purpose' going out of your way to say most abuse doesn't happen with intent is just crazy fucking dangerous.
So many abuse victims struggle with this!! Coming to terms with the idea that was done to them was done on purpose is an important thing! People who think that abuse wasnt done on purpose are far more likely to go back to the abuser!
The idea that most abuse isn't done on purpose because someone doesn't think 'I'm going to be abusive' is extremely dangerous rhetoric
Christ alive you people haven't read Lundy Bancroft's Why Does He Do That and it shows. Should be required reading.
The idea of mutual abuse is just abuser rhetoric so I'm not even going to dignify it with a response.
Literally all of my abusers meant to harm me I don't understand why this idea is taking hold so strongly lately online. People mean to cause harm. Yes you can unintentionally cause harm but abuse is a pattern of behavior where someone is harming and controlling someone, which is often done with plans. My ex told me I couldn't break up with him unless I paid back every dollar he spent on me throughout our relationship. His intent was to trap me in a relationship.
like he's, abusive behaviors *can* be done without intent, but it's honestly not as common as this post seems to suggest in my experience. This post feels like a well intentioned ocd spiral waiting to happen.
people keep reposting my comics without credit or permission so heres a dump of my comics frome my twitter @/cuptoast
do not my reposts my art, if u see one of my comics uploaded to here, it was not with my permisiions!
If you had to sing a child to sleep RIGHT NOW what would you sing and it CANT BE a lullaby it has to be a regular song
even saying cost of living leaves something bitter in my mouth what kind of fucking phrase is that. vile
Reminder: People can get on the internet and say anything; but just because they say what they say with confidence and academic language, does not mean they're correct.
People love to be loud and wrong, so please make sure to also do your own unbiased research!
That is all.
My "It can't be that bad- no one from the 29th century showed up to undo what I did." t-shirt is raising a lot of questions from Temporal Investigations that my t-shirt should have explained.
if you call women “females” i automatically do not trust or like you
you really wont like the military then buddy
jokes on you, i already hate the military
The fact that antisemites are using the word "noticing" and "noticing patterns" as dogwhistles is annoying because I do actually notice a lot of stuff, patterns included, and one of the most obvious patterns I've noticed to date is that all antisemitic rhetoric makes no sense if you think critically about it for 5 seconds. Often less
A TERF liked this post so I just want to clarify that another pattern I've noticed is the massive overlap between anti-trans rhetoric and antisemitic rhetoric
Thinking about how red marble stone look way too much like meat
