EdgyUsername1

[edgyusername1]

We're supposed to eat 3² meals a day?! That's way too much!

[edgyusername1]

how fucking stupid is it that starbucks invented spanish just so they could have different words to describe their coffee sizes???

[edgyusername1]

We seriously need to re-normalize intermissions during long movies.

[edgyusername1]

I don't trust 2% milk drinkers. Either drink the fat or don't, you coward.

[edgyusername1]

The problem with adaptive normativity is that the societal leaders can often change things on a whim, but the society they preside over takes decades to adjust.

[edgyusername1]

I do not pour my heart out into a glass to get four notes!

I do it so that I may drink of it and become a vampire.

[edgyusername1]

Slow children playing?

Tell them to hurry up!

[edgyusername1]

Oh my God.

I FEEL INVINCIBLE! I TURNED IN AN ESSAY THAT WAS DUE AT 8 AM AT 7:59:59!

Shoot me, I dare you. I shall not bleed.

[edgyusername1]

If there is a poo emoji, why is there no pee emoji?

[edgyusername1]

If I die, I want my headstone to read "he was a good dog" to confuse future archeologists and historians.

[pukicho]

Luigis mansion was a game about Luigis mansion

[edgyusername1]

False.

[pukicho]

Strength in numbers they said, that’s why I swallowed 36 cough drops, yet I’m weaker than ever before

[edgyusername1]

They meant strength for them, Puki. An enemy’s weakness is an ally’s strength.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

Chess is fucking boring, we should add new pieces

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

and I have suggestions!!!

Knight w/ Machine Gun. Can kill anything within a 3 square radius (no more of that 2-forward-1-to-the-side nosense)

Archer. normal rook but with a bow & a single arrow, can kill any one piece in its line of sight

Double Agent. one of your opponent’s pieces has been turned; it will do your biding when the time comes

Landmine. You get to choose one square that blows up if your opponent lands on it

Nuclear Apocalypse. avoid certain defeat by just flipping over the entire fucking chessboard. just make it rain stupid fucking little wooden castles & horses & shit. tear the board in half with your teeth idgaf

[monsterswithvibes]

some of us enjoy chess

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

and now you can enjoy it SO MUCH MORE

[autisticfordprefect]

Cyanide tablet. You swallow one piece of your choosing.

Lesbian mode. Both players get two queens. The the king is still there but it’s called the McGuffin now.

Mole. Tunnels underneath the board and pops up underneath an enemy piece. It’s very cinematic.

Knife. Knife your opponent.

[edgyusername1]

Are the first and last IRL?

[edgyusername1]

Critical thinking is not mathematical thinking. It can be, but not necessarily.

[edgyusername1]

There are children starving in Chernobyl, Andrew.

[edgyusername1]

"Jimmy Neutron?"

Oh, you must mean Jimward Nutrition.

[edgyusername1]

I wish to YEET myself from this mortal coil