ummm uhhh ummmm

22 / CRAWFISH 😍😍😍😍

[maxxie-or-smth]

you ever crave something you can't have? ssssshut up about your ex i mean i want grilled cheese but im scared of the stove

[teashoesandhair]

I'm in a little local cafe and the women behind the counter started griping to each other, "Oh Christ, Stephen's back again," "It's him, is it? I thought he'd stopped coming," "It's definitely him, look, it's bloody Stephen on a Thursday morning," "Do you want me to get rid of him or are you going to do it?" and so I was peering outside, trying to spot this nightmare customer, this pestilence of a person, this pox upon the cafe trade, and then one of the women from behind the counter ran outside, clapping two trays together loudly and yelling "GET OUT OF IT, STEPHEN!" and it turns out that Stephen is an absolutely gigantic fuck-off seagull who hangs around outside, menacing people for crumbs

[logarto]

threatening animals isn't funny

do you think I have any actual intention of carbombing a hamster ball

[importantdogimages]

[virtualgirladvance]

[segamascott]

[biodegrade]

if u addicted to your feed u might b a chicken .

[enba-and-luka]

[dankmemeuniversity]

[iamoutofideas]

[palmer]

I’m going to the grocery store does anyone want to sublet my apartment for 45 minutes

[jurynullification]

How much

[palmer]

Only 3400

[jurynullification]

hot damn 🏃‍♂️ cmon guys lets go 🏃‍♂️🐕🐕🐕🐕🐕🐕🐕🐕🐕🐕🐕🧞‍♀️

[palmer]

ok I’m back you and your boyfriend and your dog and your dog and your dog and your dog and your dog and your dog and your dog and your dog and your dog and your dog and your dog and your djinn can go

[moon111111]

[zapatism]

lol ur watching the world cup finals sorry im too busy HAVING SEX

(texting my dick guy) we gotta have sex rn i just blogged

(dick guy) im watching the world cup

[maykitz]

did you know that up to 45% of heart attacks are so-called 'silent' heart attacks that produce little to no symptoms but are no less dangerous? look up "drunk college boy gets impregnated like a girl video" to find out more

[iwannabeaswampwitch]

Lots of drama in our household

[itwashotwestayedinthewater]

[itwashotwestayedinthewater]

happy decade to the horrible beast i have wrought

[dogpuppy]

[greelin]

i’ll never get over the fact that so many grown ass adults DO seem to show up to public places just to cough like toddlers and yet I’M weird/impolite/The Bad Guy for looking at them like this every single time i have to witness it