Stutterstep To The Rescue

I'm Haley and I love bread

[doggirlpaws]

The spirit of Diogenes is alive and well

[penstab]

i have a horrible misogynist rooster who only likes blonde hens so i always have to make sure i have 2-3 yellow hens around so he doesn't run anyone ragged. i didn't know this was a problem someone could have but i've had macklemore for eight slutty, slutty years and he's been overly obsessed with the blondness level of his lady friends for the entire time with no sign of slowing down so, like. props to him for sticking to his guns.

SIR, PLEASE,

[penstab]

YOU CANT JUST CASUALLY LEAVE THIS IN THE REPLIES AS IF THIS ISNT A CRUCIAL ELEMENT OF THIS HARROWING STORY

SIR!!!!!!

[papayagas]

mostly she regards him with a certain genteel confusion- no matter how many grand overtures he makes, juno’s never really figured out that he’s not just a really weird plant? since the birds mostly stay in my garden wrecking all my vegetables. 

[brodudepants]

God even the tags are gold

[world-heritage-posts]

world heritage post

[stormbornstargaryen-deactivated]

[ohshit-personified]

This is and always will be the single most iconic moment in cinematic history and I will hear nothing to the contrary

[thecutestlittlebunbunfairy]

Merry Christmas y'all

[bixbythemartian]

'tis the season

[xenosaurus]

I think the greatest irony of my life is when the cafeteria at my college changed all the lights to blue bulbs for “autism awareness”, which fucked with my sensory issues badly enough that I could barely stand to be in the building

[xenosaurus]

I was certainly aware of my autism, at least.

[grimeclown]

My political stance is that dimes should either be bigger OR worth less money. Also that our military should be dissolved. And all living former presidents should be executed for crimes against humanity along with our current one.

[grimeclown]

Also we get rid of the presidency entirely and reform the house and senate and make it so supreme court judges cant hold seats until they die and we draw more people out to vote by attaching a collectible trading card to every ballot that can be torn off and taken home

[grimeclown]

Okay i have a new political stance

[morepopcornplease]

the chaos of 2020: unimaginably painful. miserable. quite literally deadly.

the chaos of this past week: e x h i l a r a t i n g 

[fatsoupy]

i found out yesterday while my grandpa was helping me move that he consistently carries four knives on him at all times. it’s as natural as carrying around his phone and wallet for him. he says if anyone ever attacks him and takes his first knife, they’re in for a surprise. if they take his second knife? another surprise. his third knife? buddy, you’re in for a treat: another knife

[fatsoupy]

i told knife grandpa this post got famous and he got real paranoid as if suddenly everyone everywhere is going to know he has all these knives on him

[bbulbasaurgarden]

Apparently there's a gritney now?

riotrogers from twitter made the gritney costume and it's honestly amazing.

[raiisakitsune]

Destiel is canon then not

Dabi is a todoroki theory canon

Eren commiting mass genocide and the final battle of snk/aot

The 2020 election and ga going blue

Ppl finding out Putin is stepping down from destiel shitposts ???

Sherlock season 5?????

God:

[adz]

one time this nondescript guy came into my dunkin donuts and ordered a small black coffee with blueberry flavor shot, and for some reason that peculiar order stuck with me so much that when, seven months later, i saw him in the parking lot walking towards the door, i quickly made a small black coffee with blueberry flavor shot. he ordered it and i was already holding it. 

i would describe his demeanor that second time as “incredulous”

[honeylemony]

What the fuck who drinks that

[adz]

it’s such a perfectly bonkers order because like, most unusual orders are maximalist and sugary but this one just combines the most basic drink with the most incongruous little add-on. it’s the order of a simple, regular man who has something wrong with him

[phage-necro]

this post always makes me laugh. this guy has the weirdest drink order and he probably never goes to this dunkin’ if it took seven months for the barista to see him again. so think about a coffee shop you go to so little you’re not even sure if you’ve gone there before and you walk in and the barista hands you the drink you were about to order before you even ordered it. he will remember that for the rest of his life

[adulthoodisokay]

“it’s the order of a simple, regular man who has something wrong with him” gets me every time.

[absolutewriting-rubbish]

[nymphaticc]

[doctorguilty]

mutuals meet me in the exhaustion funnel 

[deaddolin]

literally a PERFECT video

[deaddolin]

i still cant get over how they look and emote like fucking sims characters

[egg-nog-enthusiast]

There’s no homosexual thoughts or feelings happening here officer! Just a slightly masculine looking cis woman living life only being sexually attracted to men! The only trans I know is how to transFORM ingredients in my fridge into a home cooked meal! Lol! I live for my future husband and our future children and love our lord and savior Jesus Christ amen😇🙌🏻

[umlindsay]

Literally just... imagine waking up in a world where Tr*mp is no longer president.. that sounds so incredibly sexy to me

[antigonehappy]

like to charge reblog to cast

[omghotmemes]

Just a little longer now