An rien peut arrêter moi konin la

🌹28🌹

[1eos]

[whyenn-reader]

you are not immune to inventing an arbitrary set of rules that only you have to adhere to

[pancakeke]

this morning i got a spam call that just played clown waiting music for a few seconds and then hung up on me. which really pissed me off a lot

[ryebreadgf]

once I snorted a fat line of nuance and everything started depending. watch out

[mariacallous]

[entirelytookeen]

[sharkgirldick]

Boob job from a girl with big naturals...?

[juniepops]

[olicrosse]

[cephalopodvictorious]

fixed it

[star-thief]

[geniusoflove]

good god when the mr clean magic eraser hits the stove......

[proheromidoriyashouto]

the panties hit the floor

[geniusoflove]

you know it brother

[an-american-whore]

Cant tell you how many times I rawd*gged my husband after I caught him using a magic eraser to clean the pasta sauce I burned onto the burner like some kind of primordial insect

[geniusoflove]

you know what i wish you would tell me

[3000s]

elvis died because it wasnt getting enough fiber

[3000s]

ive never fucked up someones pronouns this badly before, sorry

[chrisbattleart]

[jame7t]

Dude my coworker left a scrumptious cookie unattended

[jame7t]

Uh, your honor? I scrumped it

[werewolf-transgenderism]

this is fucking killing me bro. computah, show me more hot hockey firefighters whaling on cops

[meanbuddhist]

my body knows something that i don’t and i can’t get her to talk to me

[evilvillain123456789]

>Hit pedestrian

>Check engine light turns back off

[bgm05]

the reason usa birth rates going down is because we have a whole generation of women whose sexual awakening was Sans undertale and none of the men want to wear jorts and drink ketchup and go Er er er

[stupidestasshole]

what if it was called magic the slathering and it was about lotions and ointments

[shirtsthatgohard]