tender like a bruise;

remi. 28. she/they. lesbian. just a blog to dump my fanfic, musings, and character simping. open to requests, just read the rules first! 18+ only.

[endsinblood]

Basics:

I'm Remi, I'm 28, a lesbian and go by she/they pronouns! I love writing both fanfiction and original works, but this blog is mainly just a place for me to write my self indulgent little fics. I'm open to requests, so long as you adhere to my rules. They aren't too strict, I prommy.

Rules:

I only write from a fem/gender neutral reader's perspective. It's just easiest for me (and again, I'm self indulgent).

I will write darker content/AUs seeing as some of my fandoms are straight up horror or contain darker material. However, I reserve the right to decline any requests that make me uncomfortable.

I only occasionally write smut, I'm not super good at it. But if you're particularly struck by an idea, you can hmu and I'll see what I can do!

Not super well versed in or great with hard kinks or anything like that btw, but we'll see lol

I will not write anything with rape or incest

I love writing angst and tender fluff. AUs are also definitely my jam!

I can't really think of anything else for now but I'll update this as necessary/as I see fit

Characters I accept requests for (subject to change):

Sam Carpenter (Scream franchise)

Amanda Young (Saw franchise)

Helena Eagan/Helly R — #HellynaRealness (Severance)

Abby Anderson (The Last of Us)

Trinity Santos (The Pitt)

Will consider other ladies from any of those fandoms as well!

Celebrities I accept requests for (subject to change):

TWICE J-line (Myoui Mina, Minatozaki Sana, Hirai Momo)

Gracie Abrams

Writing from my old blog can be found here. Will update with a masterlist here soon.

[endsinblood]

added abby anderson to the list of characters I write and take requests for 👀 and added some celebrities too (twice j-line aka misamo and gracie abrams). sorry for the rpf 🙏 ehehe

[endsinblood]

I have so many hellyna requests in my inbox sjdjfk I gotta get back into my groove fr

[endsinblood]

need to let go of shame and write more lesbian smut...for my soul. if anyone has any requests hmu

[endsinblood]

PAIRING: Amanda Young x fem!reader WORD COUNT: 800+ SUMMARY: John chose Amanda, but Amanda chose you. And now you were all hers. WARNINGS: toxic ish relationship? and relatively tame, if not a little rough, smut. a little blood drawn, marking, fingering (r!receiving) etc. A/N: This is uhh pretty much my first time writing smut since I ... was a teenager poorly writing it with way too much hubris. Please be gentle LOL

It felt almost violent. And yet, there was a tenderness to it. The way you and Amanda broke each other down and then built each other back up. The way you licked each other’s wounds. You were both volatile, rough around the edges, but soft in the middle. Damaged.

How could either of you ever have anticipated this? She’d chosen you. You barely knew each other from before, but she’d seen you. Seen through you. Your brokenness, your madness, she wanted to help you. Wanted to push you into metamorphosis. And so you were tested.

You were tested and then, in her hands, you grew wings. She primed you into something entirely new. Now you worked with her, you were set to be the one to stand by her side as she continued on John’s work.

You didn’t really feel like you belonged. But Amanda held you close anyway, her arms like a cage. You couldn’t fly away. But it wasn’t like you really wanted to, even despite all reason. You felt something for her, something deep and endless. You could never quite find a name for it. Longing was too simple, too pretty. Love felt cheap. It was all so much more and far uglier.

She saved you. Maybe you didn’t belong here, but you belonged with her.

And she liked to remind you that you belonged to her as well.

You’re in your shithole apartment, up well past 2 am. You could rarely seem to sleep these days, with dreams came memories. Ones you’d rather keep buried. The urgent knock on your door at this hour has you jumping out of your skin. When you look through the peep hole and see Amanda, the relief that washes over you is brief, your worry for her overtaking any previous fears.

You open the door, immediately leaving room for her to come in. “What’s going on? Are you okay?”

There’s this dark look in her eyes, like there’s a storm brewing inside her. “I just wanted to see you,” Amanda says. “I…” She takes a deep breath, it almost sounds shaky.

“What are you thinking about?” A gentle attempt at prying.

She looks at you, and in the darkness of her eyes, comes a certain reverence too. Amanda shakes her head. “You. Just you.”

You open your mouth to speak, but find yourself at a loss for words. You want to press further, knowing her, there was much more underneath the surface. But you can’t find it in yourself.

Amanda decides to take advantage of your surprise, yanking you closer by the hips and kissing you deeply, roughly. You react on instinct, kissing her back with just as much fervor. She backs you into the wall, bites your bottom lip hard enough to draw blood. You moan at the feeling and metallic taste.

Her mouth trails down your jaw to your neck, kissing and nipping at the skin on her way down. You were falling apart, her actions already eliciting needy whines. As your hands tangle in her hair, her own hands begin to wander further. Tracing your abdomen, feeling your curves, hand ghosting just above your waistband. “God, please,” you pant out, desperate. 

“So needy for me already, hm?” Amanda says, voice just above a whisper, mouth ghosting over your ear. It makes you shiver.

“You’re torturing me,” you whine.

She huffs out a laugh, amused, but ultimately just as eager as you. Finally her hand finds its way into your sweatpants, slipping past the fabric of your panties. Your breath hitches, breaking into a full moan as she teases your folds. “You’re so fucking wet,” she says. The way she slowly rubs circles on your clit has you gripping onto her arm.

“Mandy,” you moan. That’s when she finally slides a finger inside.

“Tell me you’re mine,” she says, her pace inside you slow and steady.

“Fuck, I’m yours.”  She makes quick work of proving it too, as she adds another finger, speeding up and curling her fingers just right.

“Say it again,” she sucks and bites at your neck so hard you know it’ll leave marks.

“I’m yours, I’m yours.” You cry out, her fingers pumping in and out of you. God, it felt so fucking good. You were like any other machine under her skilled, calloused hands. She knew exactly how to work you.

She kisses you sloppily, your moans getting higher pitched and breaths growing heavier as you get closer and closer to your peak. All you can do is helplessly pant and moan into her mouth. You feel that familiar coil tightening in your stomach, before finally unwinding. You cum screaming her name, “Amanda.” Your head was devoid of anything else now. She swallows the sound with a rough kiss as she lets you ride out your high.

“That’s what I was thinking about,” she says.

[endsinblood]

me: I love tender fluff, toxic ships aren't the only interesting ones!

also me: *sweeping my stalker!helena eagan fic in my drafts under the rug* don't look at that.

[endsinblood]

you're a big deal — helena eagan x reader

requested by anonymous: hi! would you be willing to write some hurt/comfort with a reader comforting helena? maybe after having issues with jame? thank you! word count: 569 warnings: just a bit of angst & self deprecation + not super proofread A/N: maybe not the best or most in character since it's my first time writing for helena, but I tried! probably could be read as gn!reader I'd say.

You reach across the table and put your hand on top of Helena's, the action seems to loosen her tight grip on her silverware. Her eyes had been intently fixated on her plate, despite barely even picking at the food on it. But your gentle touch prompts her to look up, meeting your worried gaze.

She looked so tense and her eyes seemed to hold a storm of emotion. “Is everything alright?” You ask.

“I'm fine,” says Helena, as if on instinct. A habit of keeping it all inside. Pushing down any feeling deemed immature or inconvenient by those around her. But you refused to let her feel that need to hide any longer. At least with you.

“I know you,” you say, and you did. Possibly better than anyone. “What's wrong?”

“I told you—I'm fine,” she insists. She pulls her hand away from yours, averting her gaze in favor of studying and picking at her otherwise untouched meal.

You look a bit hurt, but you try to put on a brave face regardless. “Don't do that.”

“Do what?” Helena looks back up, eyes intense. It's almost like a challenge. 

“Push me away,” you say. “I'm not going to judge you. I love you.” You refuse to back down.

Helena practically bristles under the affection, still so unaccustomed to it. “I'm sorry, I'm just really not used to this,” she says.

“It's okay,” you assure her. “But I just want you to know that you don't have to hide your feelings from me. I want to be here.”

“I know—and I love you, I really do,” she says quietly. “But I just don't know how to talk about it.”

“Maybe it'd be easier if we weren't eating overpriced food, and far too dressed up.” You respond, a soft smile blooming.

She laughs at that a little, “I thought you liked this restaurant.”

“It has its charms, but I'd rather be on my couch with you, and eating takeout.”

“I think I'd prefer that too,” Helena replies.

And so you head back home, introducing Helena to your favorite chinese takeout, and watching bad reality TV together. She makes it a habit to nitpick and judge the stars of said reality TV shows just as much and as naturally as you'd expected.

But by the end of the night, the television shuts off and Helena's head is in your lap. It's quiet for a long while but then, “I wish I felt good enough.” Says Helena, voice so soft and small.

“You are,” you say, fingers gently carding through her hair.

“I don't feel like it,” she lets out a shaky breath. “My father likes to remind me I'll never be enough for him. There's a standard there with him and the company that I'll never reach.”

“You're enough for me,” you emphasize. “Your dad is a crazy old man. And also a dick.”

She lets out a teary laugh at that, “you're too sweet to me.”

“You deserve it,” you say. “You're everything, Helena. More than you know.”

It seems like those words open the floodgates, Helena breaking into tears. This kind of tenderness was just so foreign to her, but it means the world coming from you. “Thank you,” she says, voice breaking, barely above a whisper.

“Of course.” And then you just hold her, petting her hair, whispering your love and reassurances.

It's both almost too much for Helena to bear, but also exactly what she needs. You were exactly what she's always needed.

[lanawinterscigarettes]

Close to Her Heart (Amanda Young x reader)

Summary: you surprise Amanda with an unexpected gift

Warnings: surprisingly tame for a Saw fic (and by that I mean this is literally just cutesy fluff with an offhand mention of the traps involved), soft Mandy because I can <3

A/N: I've been binging the movies recently and needed to direct my newest hyperfixation on them into something productive, hence this. I want to start writing for Amanda anyway so I thought I'd try to get a feel for her character first

Amanda was looking over the plans for some of her latest traps when something dropped onto the papers in front of her. She turned towards you, an inquisitive look on her face as she picked up the object. "What is this?"

"It's a necklace!" You replied enthusiastically, a wide grin spread across your face. "I made it myself. Do you like it?"

Her eyes dropped down to the object in her hands. It was indeed a necklace of sorts, with a silver chain and matching clasp in the back. The thing that really caught her eye, however, was the pendant on the end; it was a heart that has been melded and put together by several different pieces of metal. The design was a little crude, sure, but she could tell you put a lot of thought into it.

Tearing her eyes away from the piece of jewelry, she looked up at you with a soft expression. "You... made this? For me?"

You nodded your head eagerly, still grinning. "Yup! What do you think?"

Her hands clutched the necklace tightly, though she was careful not to be too rough so it wouldn't break. "I love it," she whispered in awe, the usual scowl on her face long gone.

Letting out a squeal of joy, your eyes brightened tenfold. "I'm so happy to hear that! I'll let you get back to work now."

Amanda watched as you left her section of the workshop, your step even peppier than usual. She carefully opened up her hands to reveal the necklace again, her hands shaking slightly as she unclasped the back piece and put it on.

Receiving gifts wasn't something she was used to, far from it. And despite John's voice ringing in her head, reminding her not to make any emotional attachments, she just couldn't help but want to wear the necklace everyday, that way she'd always have a piece of you close to her heart.

Likes < reblogs | comments are greatly appreciated | requests are currently open

Main masterlist | Saw masterlist | wanna be added to my taglist?

🏷 taglist: none yet to tag

[notinmymovie]

SECRETS

PAIRING: Amanda Young x fem!reader WORD COUNT: 600+ REQUESTED: No SUMMARY: Apprentice!reader and Amanda grow closer as the days pass. As feelings grow so do secrets shared and the inevitability of being vulnerable.

Even if you tried to deny it, if not only for the sake of guarding both of your hearts—it was there. An undeniable spark, a rising tension. You grew to care about Amanda more than you ever would have anticipated, and even in spite of herself, she cared about you just the same.

You were a surprise to everyone. An apprentice no one would have predicted ever having the guts to become one. At first, there was a hint of animosity between the two of you. While not quite threatened by you, Amanda was unsure of you. And maybe a little jealous of anyone else deemed worthy by John. But even from the start, despite the situation, you were always more interested in earning Amanda’s attention, falling into her good graces.

And now, the two of you worked together like a well oiled machine. Almost mirroring each other in ways, it seemed like you brought a certain balance to one another. She taught you some things, you gave her a new perspective on others. It was a cycle of seeing and being seen, which in turn gave you both a clearer vision.

Right now, in the workshop—you should be keeping yourself busy, making yourself useful. But instead you can’t help but be caught up in watching Amanda work. Noticing the way her brows furrowed and how strong yet delicate her hands worked on whatever surely deadly machine she was creating. Her eyes linger over the plans as your eyes linger over her.

“You’re beautiful,” you can’t help but blurt out. When her eyes shoot up from the plans spread across the table, you feel your own widen. “Sorry.”

She looks puzzled at first, then like she’s contemplating her next move, just what to say. Then you see a smirk cross her face. “You mind repeating that?” She says. “I’m not sure I heard correctly.”

You can immediately feel your face turn hot, no doubt flushing red. Still, you try your best to steel your nerves. “I said—you’re beautiful.” You take a deep breath, still just a little embarrassed. “I like watching you work,” you say softly.

Her smug expression softens just a bit. “Really?” she asks, brow quirking. She was obviously taken aback. “Come over here,” she says.

And you do, naturally following her words. You lean over, seeing the elaborate plans and the half built contraption. You’re practically in awe. “Wow,” you say, nearly breathless. “You’re kind of amazing.” When you look up, she’s leaning forward too, putting you in close contact. It makes you much more conscious of your dreamy eyed compliment.

She grins, “you really seem to like complimenting me today.”

“I’d say you deserve it every once in a while.” You say, eyes meeting hers.

“You know, sometimes I almost forget that soft little girl that came to us. You’re a lot rougher now these days.” Amanda says casually. “But then sometimes, I still see it in you.”

It was something you both shared, feeling so deeply. That irrationality, the impulsivity—though you sometimes could balance each other out, it was still like a wound that never stopped bleeding.

“You’re softer than you want to think you are too,” you say. 

She smiles, a lot gentler than you’ve ever seen. But then she leans in even closer, gently pulls you forward to whisper in your ear, “well, I guess that can be our little secret.”

She doesn’t let go just yet and in the close proximity you venture to say, “does it have to be our only one?”

Now she pulls away, some kind of glint in her eye. “Not if you don’t want it to be.” You can’t help but smile at that, a smirk clearly tugging at her own lips too. “Stick around, since you like watching, I might as well teach you something.”

You simply nod, feeling electrified.

A/N: just a random little thing that popped into my head. Might add more to this particular little AU later, might not. Hope you liked it either way. <3

[endsinblood]

hi! would you be willing to write some hurt/comfort with a reader comforting helena? maybe after having issues with jame? thank you!

first request filled! yaaaay!! here it is, I hope you like it <3

[endsinblood]

you're a big deal — helena eagan x reader

requested by anonymous: hi! would you be willing to write some hurt/comfort with a reader comforting helena? maybe after having issues with jame? thank you! word count: 569 warnings: just a bit of angst & self deprecation + not super proofread A/N: maybe not the best or most in character since it's my first time writing for helena, but I tried! probably could be read as gn!reader I'd say.

You reach across the table and put your hand on top of Helena's, the action seems to loosen her tight grip on her silverware. Her eyes had been intently fixated on her plate, despite barely even picking at the food on it. But your gentle touch prompts her to look up, meeting your worried gaze.

She looked so tense and her eyes seemed to hold a storm of emotion. “Is everything alright?” You ask.

“I'm fine,” says Helena, as if on instinct. A habit of keeping it all inside. Pushing down any feeling deemed immature or inconvenient by those around her. But you refused to let her feel that need to hide any longer. At least with you.

“I know you,” you say, and you did. Possibly better than anyone. “What's wrong?”

“I told you—I'm fine,” she insists. She pulls her hand away from yours, averting her gaze in favor of studying and picking at her otherwise untouched meal.

You look a bit hurt, but you try to put on a brave face regardless. “Don't do that.”

“Do what?” Helena looks back up, eyes intense. It's almost like a challenge. 

“Push me away,” you say. “I'm not going to judge you. I love you.” You refuse to back down.

Helena practically bristles under the affection, still so unaccustomed to it. “I'm sorry, I'm just really not used to this,” she says.

“It's okay,” you assure her. “But I just want you to know that you don't have to hide your feelings from me. I want to be here.”

“I know—and I love you, I really do,” she says quietly. “But I just don't know how to talk about it.”

“Maybe it'd be easier if we weren't eating overpriced food, and far too dressed up.” You respond, a soft smile blooming.

She laughs at that a little, “I thought you liked this restaurant.”

“It has its charms, but I'd rather be on my couch with you, and eating takeout.”

“I think I'd prefer that too,” Helena replies.

And so you head back home, introducing Helena to your favorite chinese takeout, and watching bad reality TV together. She makes it a habit to nitpick and judge the stars of said reality TV shows just as much and as naturally as you'd expected.

But by the end of the night, the television shuts off and Helena's head is in your lap. It's quiet for a long while but then, “I wish I felt good enough.” Says Helena, voice so soft and small.

“You are,” you say, fingers gently carding through her hair.

“I don't feel like it,” she lets out a shaky breath. “My father likes to remind me I'll never be enough for him. There's a standard there with him and the company that I'll never reach.”

“You're enough for me,” you emphasize. “Your dad is a crazy old man. And also a dick.”

She lets out a teary laugh at that, “you're too sweet to me.”

“You deserve it,” you say. “You're everything, Helena. More than you know.”

It seems like those words open the floodgates, Helena breaking into tears. This kind of tenderness was just so foreign to her, but it means the world coming from you. “Thank you,” she says, voice breaking, barely above a whisper.

“Of course.” And then you just hold her, petting her hair, whispering your love and reassurances.

It's both almost too much for Helena to bear, but also exactly what she needs. You were exactly what she's always needed.

[spellsyzygy]

your innie’s first day | a helena/helly r. x reader fic

2.2k words, severance (season 2) canon-adjacent, fem. reader, i wouldn’t call it “proof-read”

| you wake up, confused and knowing nothing about who you are. a newly severed ‘innie’, a half-baked escape plan, and an unfamiliar love. will helly be able to tell you who you are — and do you really want to know the answer?

warnings: mentions of self-mutilation (minimal), blood (minimal), power imbalance (?), violence (minimal), mentions of suicide (helly r.), girls kissing (ohohoho!), not a slow burn.

before you read (SEVERANCE S2 SPOILERS): helena & outie!r have an established relationship. this fic can be read in two different ways (with true helly or with helena masquerading as her — whatever floats your boat). outie!r met helly during the lumon event (they have a positive relationship) . outie!r does not know the extent of what lumon is up to or what really happens on the severed floor.

—

> ?:??am, innie, lumon’s severed floor

your face is pressed against a cool, flat surface. the back of your head throbs. you groan and sit up, the walls around you are bare. it seems like you’re in some sort of conference room. but if that's true, why are you lying in the center of the table?

“hi there, you on the table!” a cheery, but rather nervous voice echos from the device in front of you.

“who is that?” you back away from the device carefully, pulling your skirt further down over your legs.

“would you be interested in answering a few questions?” the voice asks.

you don’t respond, instead you plop off the table and onto the floor. you scan the room, the only way out appears to be through the metal door behind you.

‘i need a weapon.’ you run your hands up and down the chairs, searching for anything of use. you turn the first chair over, ‘nothing.’

“uh- e-excuse me! i understand you may feel confused, but i strongly believe answering these questions will help you feel better.”

under the second chair, you feel something wiggle against your pull. a long piece of metal, a screw. it’s not very sharp but it’ll do. you start to work it out of the chair.

“s-sure. i’ll answer a few questions.” you’ll play along, for now.

“thank you! okay, first question; who are you?”

you stop. you don’t know the answer. “i…” you fiddle with the end of the screw — its almost out. you tug it free and slide it up your blouse sleeve. “i don’t know.”

“just confirming, you don’t know who you are?” the voice asks.

you sigh and look up trying to spy any cameras hidden in the fluorescent lights, “sorry. i don’t.”

the voice asks you a few more questions, something about a state and another about your mother’s eye color. then, you hear the door click open. you back up against the opposite wall, palming the screw in your hand. a brown-haired man in a suit walks in and shuts the door behind him.

“don’t fucking touch me…” you growl.

he picks up the chair you knocked over and sits, “you got a perfect score and in record time, congratulations.” he smiles at you. “you’re a very good listener.”

something inside you stirs. “what do you want from me?”

“a better question is ‘what do you want from lumon’?” he sets down a file folder and spreads out a few papers. “how about knowing who you are?” he motions to the chair across from him.

you grip the screw so tightly it digs into your skin. you may have forgotten your name, but that doesn’t mean you're helpless. you step towards the man, cautiously.

the door clicks open again, a red-headed woman enters and stares at you, “drop it.”

you let the screw fall to the floor, you don’t even realize you complied until you hear it thud on the carpet.

“he’s right, you are a good listener.” she smirks at you and takes a seat at the head of the table, motioning to the seat across from the man.

“helly… i had it under control.” he groans.

“really? cause it looked like she was about to stab you.”

you stagger forward and sit down, eyes darting from one face to the other. the man clears his throat.

“hello! i’m mark s. this is helly r.” he turns a paper around to you, “and according this this, you’re—“

your ears ring as you look at the paper in front of you. it has your name on it and there’s an ID photo of yourself paperclipped to the corner; you’re smiling in the picture. it makes your stomach hurt.

“that’s me?” you question, touching the picture.

“that’s you.” helly answers, she leans in and studies your face.

mark explains the ultimate work/life balance to you, severance.

“why would i sever?” you ask and stare up at mark.

“yeah, why would you sever?” helly inquires, she stares at you in awe, but you’re not sure why.

“you mean; why would your outie sever” he smiles and clears his throat again, “unfortunately, why our outies sever is up to them. that information cannot be disclosed in respect of their privacy.”

“privacy? it’s my-“

“how about a tour?!” mark shoots up and collects the papers back into the folder. helly scoffs but stands and steps towards the door. mark beats her to it and holds it open, motioning for you to follow. helly nods her head slightly.

“c’mon,”

you follow them down hallway after unending hallway. you cross your arms as you trudge your way to your new home, macrodata refinement. your supervisor, mr. milchek takes time to introduce you to the rest of your team and sits you down at your desk.

“mark, would you please elaborate on today’s task for our new friend? and — while you’re doing that, i’ll prepare us some fresh, succulent melon” milchek extends the last word of his sentence with a sing-songy tune. he pats your shoulders before slipping out the door.

mark explains the work to you. it’s mysterious and important — that’s been made clear. but you can’t focus on the numbers in front of you; your mind is reeling and it doesn’t help that your coworker, dylan, keeps glaring at you.

“why the fuck would they add a new person to the team after what happened? she’s totally a spy.” he peers over his divider at you.

you huff in response.

“if she’s a spy she’s total shit at it.” helly chides, leaning back in her chair to look at you. “her heads down and her hands are over her ears.”

you scoff and push yourself away from your desk. “wow, you guys are awesome.” your words dripping with sarcasm.

you you think a coffee will make you feel better; you head to the kitchen and pour yourself a cup. as you lean against the counter and sip, you do feel a little better.

“hey,” helly coos from the doorway, “sorry, we’re being assholes.” she moves in closer to you, “except dylan, he’s actually like that all the time.”

you let out a small laugh and her eyes light up. she pours herself a cup and leans against the counter next to you. she taps her fingers against her mug.

“at least the coffee here is good.” helly raises her mug to you and takes a sip.

“like we’d know any better?” you snap. “sorry.” you rub your hand against your forehead, “now who’s being an asshole?”

she chuckles. “you’re handling things a lot better than i did when i first got here.”

“i was going to stab mark.” you retort.

“still, way better than me.” she sets her mug down, “i tried everything to get out of here.”

she tells you of all her methods; swallowing a message, writing all over her arms, and of course — a suicide attempt.

“that was the closest i came to getting out of here, until…”, she trails off and shuffles uncomfortably. “anyways, what i’m trying to say is… it gets better..” she straightens her posture and heads back towards her desk.

“thank you.” you reach out and touch her arm, smiling. “um, sorry, could you point me towards the restroom?” she returns your smile and points down the hall.

you hold the empty coffee mug close to you as you make your way to the bathroom. you have a plan in mind. it’s more of an idea really — an act of rebellion? that has a better ring to it than “self mutilation”.

you peel off your blouse, leaving you in your cami, and wrap it around the mug. you catch a glimpse of yourself in the bathroom mirror, it causes you to waver. you look meek, pupils big and dialated. you suck in a breath and smash the mug against the counter. you feel it shatter and unwrap the garment; pulling out a thick, jagged shard. you shake the rest of the ceramic into the sink and bite down on the cloth. ‘here we go.’

the shard hovers against your skin, you’re not sure what to write. what do you want to say to this other version of yourself? you’re not sure if you have the pain tolerance for a manifesto, so you decide a simple ‘FUCK YOU’ will suffice. you press into your forearm, blood starts trickling down to the floor. it leaves dark, crimson splats on the bathroom tile.

you’re just about to add the next slash when the bathroom door flies open. mark & mr. milchek storm in.

“shit!” mark rushes towards you, pressing his hand down against your bleeding arm. “what are you doing?!”

milchek rips the shirt out of your mouth and smacks your wrist hard, causing the shard to fly out of your hand and into a mirror. helly pushes into the bathroom, pausing to take in the scene infront of her.

“just leaving my outie a message,” you gasp and a drained laugh escapes from you. helly’s mouth is left hanging open in a stunned half-smile.

milchek’s head snaps towards helly, “you’re at fault for this somehow — aren’t you?” he pushes mark off you and grabs your wrists. “and you were doing so well.” he pulls you towards the door, “i’m most disheartened with you. let’s ensure you don’t repeat this behavior.” he smiles at you but his grip is rough and unkind.

“mr. milchek, please!” mark shouts, “t-the cut isn’t that bad. we can say it happened when she was helping cut melon — that she was being clumsy! please, mr. milchek.”

milchek glares at you, then mark.

“two attempted suicides on your record? i don’t think that will be received well, but what do i know?” helly picks a piece of lint off her sweater and flicks it towards milchek. she makes no efforts to hide the giant grin on her face.

he releases his grip on you and stares at helly, “fine.” he forces a smile, “but this…” he motions to the mess you made, “is coming out of your paycheck.” he points at helly before storming out.

“gladly.” helly sneers, flipping milchek off as he exits.

she races towards you and clamps her hand over your wound. she raises her eyebrows towards mark and motions to the door.

“i-i’ll go get some bandages…” mark stutters and rushes out of the restroom.

helly smiles down at you, her eyes flick from yours to your wrist.

your blood starts to seep through her fingers, “what was your message gonna be?” she doesn’t seem to mind.

you sigh and shake your head, “‘fuck you’”. helly laughs in disbelief.

“poetic.” she teases.

you laugh, shakily. another wave of nausea washes over your body and you start to cry. helly pulls you into her, letting your rest your forehead against her shoulder.

“i keep thinking i’m going to wake up soon” you whimper and look up at her, “why are you being so nice to me?” she brushes a strand of hair off your face. “that’s like the only reason i don’t think this is hell.” you let out a hollow laugh.

“cause i was you.” she leans closer to you, “and you’re a good person, so it’s easy...”

you scoff, “how could you possibly know that?”

“it’s… a long story.” her eyes linger on your lips, “way too much for a first day. but, trust me.” her breath is shaky. she acts like she’s known you her whole life. her grip on your arm is tight, like she’s scared to let you go.

you wonder if she can hear your heart beating, it’s practically pounding out of your chest. your memory only stretches two hours before this moment, you can’t help but trust her. she’s being so kind and she’s so beautiful. your stomach flip-flops.

“do we know each other out there, helly?” you touch her arm and she trembles.

“y-yeah.” her eyes trail all along your body. “i can’t believe you’re here.”

you raise your hand to her cheek, “do… do you know if we’re close?” your arm has stopped bleeding now but you feel light-headed.

“uh-huh.” her breath hitches, “we are…” she sways towards you, her forehead pressing against yours. “i can’t believe you’re really here…”

you lean forward, she cups your cheeks and kisses you.

she yanks herself away, “i’m sorry—“

you pull her into another kiss and helly melts, you're so gentle with her. she struggles to be gentle with you; her nails dig into your waist, her kisses are getting rough and messy. you push back against her, “helly—“ you gasp.

she pulls away, panting, “s-sorry…”

you smirk and pat her shoulder.

“s’kay” you roll your shoulders back and clear your throat, “mark will be back soon.”

helly wets a few paper towels and wipes the blood of you. she dabs away the red handprint she left on the side of your face.

“i-im sorry,” she blots your cut, “i don’t know what i was—“

“helly, stop it.” you rest your hand on hers, “was that um… something our outies would do?”

helly nods.

“w-would you like to… do it again… sometime…?” your leg bounces anxiously.

her face burns red, “yes.” she blurts.

“are we—“

you’re cut off by mark slamming into the door, his arms are full of first aid materials. he lays them on the counter.

“i got bandages, tape, some other stuff, more bandages…” mark trails off, “i kinda just grabbed everything.”

you like mark. he makes you laugh, even when he doesn’t mean to.

he and helly start to bandage you up, they’re both so gentle with you. even when mark lifts you onto the counter, he’s treating you like your made of glass. you wonder if he knows who you are out there. you hope he thinks you’re a good person too. ‘good people apologize for trying to stab others…’ you reprimand yourself.

“i’m sorry i tried to stab you.” it comes out as a quick whisper, you expected it to be louder.

“don’t worry about it, seriously.” mark secures the bandage on your arm, “helly nailed me with a speaker during her interview.”

“which i apologized for.” helly states.

“i really don’t think you did!” mark laughs, “anyways, all better now.” he helps you down off the counter.

they walk you back to MDR and you actually start to get a hang of the numbers! though, you hate the ones that make your teeth hurt. its strange, the hours seem to fly by now. before you know it, milchek is knocking on the doorframe.

“time to clock out.” he orders. you rise and follow him towards the elevator.

helly smiles, “see you soon.”

—

> 6:30pm, outie, helena eagen’s house

“they said i got it from a cake-cutting mishap…” you winch as you rub your bandaged forearm, “atleast i got cake.” you smile up at your girlfriend.

“you didn’t have to do this,” helena huffs as she prods at her dinner, “i could have talked him out of it — it’s a big decision and if you felt pressured i-“

“lena…” you groan, “i’m fine.” you grab her hand from across the table and give it a squeeze. “i promise, babe.”

she smirks, “thank you.”

“do you think she recognizes me in there?” you bite your bottom lip. ‘i shouldn’t have asked that.’

helena drops her fork and rubs her forehead, “i don’t know.” you trace your thumb across her hand. she closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. “i’m sure you’re a good influence on her,” helena kisses your hand, “i just hope i’m not a bad influence on you.”

you lean across the table and kiss her, “always are.” you tease.

> end.

a/n: helly wants that cookie so f’ing bad. ty for reading! pls leave me suggestions for more severance fics!

[cobelschewtoy]

You’re Mine

Helena Eagan x Reader

Summary: Helly kisses what isn’t hers. Helena needs to remind you exactly who you belong to.

Tags: strap-on, hair pulling, rough sex, ficlet

Reader is wearing nondescript pants.

Words: 600

Authors note: Helena give me one chance I swear you won’t regret it.

ao3 | masterlist

Helena watches with cold eyes as Helly kisses your innie. Kisses you. The one good thing Helena has that Helly doesn’t.

It doesn’t matter that Helly made friends. That people care about her in a way they never have about Helena. Because Helena has you. You care about her. You see her and you love her and you’re hers. Helly putting her filthy hands on you is something she won’t tolerate.

Helena’s hands are clenched tight enough for her nails to dig into her skin as she stalks out of her office to find you. You’re at the kitchen table, reaching up for something in the cupboard. She doesn’t care what. She walks up behind you, tension in every line of her body, wraps her fingers around your waist and shoves your hips against the counter. You yelp in surprise, catching yourself so you’re already partially bent over for her.

“Helena?” you ask.

There’s only confusion in your voice. No fear or hate or annoyance. She grinds her hips against yours and feels the way you shiver. The stiff strap-on between her thighs was the right choice. Normally, you’re the one to worship her in the bedroom. This will be a rare treat for you.

She wants you to feel the ache as you make your oblivious way around the severed floor tomorrow.

“Did something happen?” you ask, always so concerned for her.

“Quiet,” she says and grips your hair. You submit instantly, letting her pull you into an arch as she devours you with her eyes. “Who do you belong to?”

“You,” you say. “Only you.”

Her free hand pulls down your pants while the one in your hair pushes until you’re lying flat. You’re wet enough that she can fill you with one thrust. She isn’t in the mood to give you time to adjust and relishes the way you gasp. She pulls out all the way to the tip before pushing back inside of you. You jolt and moan. Her free hand goes to your hip to keep you still as she fucks into you again.

Her pace is harsh and it isn’t long before she’s pulling you up by your hair again.

“Helena,” you whimper.

She allows a small, greedy sound to escape her.

“Say it again,” she says and tugs at your hair.

“Helena,” you moan.

“Who do you belong to?” she emphasises the question with a rougher thrust of her hips.

“You.”

Helena watches the way you gasp and moan and cling onto the counter. It makes her want to devour you whole but she remains firm in her control. She isn’t an animal.

Instead, she digs her fingers in and watches you slowly fall apart under her. When you start making those little high-pitched noises that mean you’re getting close, she snarls,

“You’re mine.”

“Yours, yours, yours,” you chant in time with her thrusts.

She feels the way you tense and break under her. She lets her nails dig in as she watches you writhe and moan for her. She memorises every twitch as you slowly come down. All this time and she still finds watching you fall apart fascinating.

She doesn’t move again until all that’s left of your orgasm is little shivers wracking your spine. She slowly drags her strap out, noting the way your breath hitches, before just as slowly pushing back in.

“Again?” you ask.

“I want you to feel this tomorrow.”

You nod, taking a deep breath. You slowly cross your wrists at the small of your back. She exhales sharply. Yes, this is exactly what she needs.

[kendrysaneela]

No but imagine being Helena Eagan. You’re a woman who has never been loved in your entire life. Your own father doesn’t care if you live or die. Then you create another version of yourself and not only does she have a friend who loves her, a boyfriend who loves her. But also a father figure who loves that version of you so much he’s willing to DIE to make sure that version of you gets to live. It’s surprising Helena isn’t more insane tbh.

[campmiasmas]

SHAWNEE SMITH as AMANDA YOUNG in SAW III (2006) dir. Darren Lynn Bousman

[endsinblood]

I need more ppl to follow, especially fellow fic authors so I can hype y'all up. so feel free to interact with this post if you're a writer (or even just share fandoms/a reader) and wanna be mutuals~

[coolfontsonline]

HELLY VIOLENCE UNLIMITED