Sunny

Hi :) 27 | Norway

[andremichaux]

THE GOOD PLACE | 1.07

[mutinsfromthemoon]

it’s a random day on their honeymoon and ilya is at the pool with shane when he notices he’s without his sunglasses. so he heads back to the hotel to grab them from their room. he’s on his way to the elevator when the receptionist calls out “mr. hollander?” and ilya stops and is about to correct her when it hits him. he’s in fact mr. hollander. and he’s just standing there grinning like an idiot in front of the receptionist who is explaining something to him that he’s not listening to at all. and when the receptionist says again “mr. hollander?” ilya goes “i’m sorry, can you explain again?” with the sappiest grin on his face.

[mutinsfromthemoon]

they’re sitting side by side in the bench, third line is on the ice. shane is without his helmet and ilya took of one of his gloves and is stroking shane’s hair. shane is so used to receiving affection from his husband that he’s not minding at all even though they’re in the middle of a game right now. he’s focused on the game while his husband is showing him affection but without realizing he turns toward ilya’s hand, takes it, kisses the palm, and turns back. ilya keeps stroking his hair and then laughs and mutters “fuck”. noticing that something went wrong shane looks back and asks “what’s up?” and ilya nods upward and shane follows the direction his husband is pointing and comes face to face with his own face on the jumbotron. he goes “shit” and looks back at ilya and they both laugh and ilya says “at least harris will be happy about this”. harris and a million people.

[jewelcoatfish]

it is a widely known fact that one should not bother themselves to ask hollanov for any relationship advice because most of the time it involves psychological warfare, but i think the elder centaurs have a more understanding outlook on it compared to the rookies. like young would complain to bood about shane not helpful in the gf advice sector and how they’re insane for doing what they did etc, and bood would glance over and say, “well were you ever afraid of losing your career or passport because you kiss your girlfriend?” and young just 😐 point taken. like the older guys hang out with shane and ilya a lot more often and have watched most of their careers, so i believe they have a more empathetic stance on it all, and the cens overall did find a few particular areas that hollanov are very good at, mostly taking care of your partner

[rattus-stultus]

one year somebody on the Centaurs team (probably Harris) gets Shane and Ilya matching spoof training jerseys. instead of saying PROPERTY OF CENTAURS across the chest they say PROPERTY OF HOLLANDER and PROPERTY OF ROZANOV. the entire locker room thinks it's the funniest thing they've ever seen. Ilya laughs. Shane chuckles too, shakes his head, calls everyone idiots. they play it off perfectly.

then they get home and it's suddenly not funny anymore because they're codependent weirdos. Shane is standing in the kitchen trying very hard not to think about the words PROPERTY OF ROZANOV while Ilya immediately changes into the PROPERTY OF HOLLANDER jersey and just... wanders around the house wearing it with the most insufferably smug look on his face. they fuck about it.

[mutinsfromthemoon]

a video is circulating in the hockey fans community showing ilya and shane during a preseason practice. shane is drinking water in the corner of the rink near where the players sit during the game when ilya comes up from behind and wraps his arms around him and opens his mouth and shane lifts the bottle and squirts water into ilya’s mouth and ilya drinks it and kisses shane on the cheek and skates away. of course the video gets a ton of views online because everyone is obsessed with the hockey husbands. and harris is always extremely happy when they manage to capture these candid moments between ilya and shane

[mutinsfromthemoon]

one of the videos on the ottawa centaurs account with the most views is the one where a handful of the guys are playing football and kicking the ball to each other. one of them kicks it too hard and has to go after it and he runs out of frame, but the video keeps rolling and catches ilya pulling shane in by his waist and kissing him while shane giggles. when the player comes back, ilya backs away from shane and they both just resume playing like it’s the most natural thing in the world. and the fans in the comments absolutely lost their minds going “oh yeah the PR relationship looking a little too real” “they’re in love your honor” “omg look at shane smiling” “they love each other so much is disgusting (affectionately)” “can we talk about how lapointe is so bad at kicking ball? thank goodness he’s a hockey player” “please some of us are single” “i bet ilya sent the ball away with his mind just to have a break to kiss shane” and ilya had liked that last one.

[mutinsfromthemoon]

ilya getting into a fight cus some player tried to be homophobic with him asking “is shane fucking you in the ass tonight?” and he answered “i hope so” and the player snarked “disgusting f*” and ilya smirked and says “maybe you’d be half as good as me if you took it up the ass, but no one wants a man who’s been fed by his parents with a slingshot because he’s too ugly to be approached” and even the player’s teammates chuckled and he lunged after ilya. on the way to the sin bin ilya skated close to his husband and he looked towards shane that only asked “how many?” and ilya answered “hat trick” and shane stepped on the ice to do as ilya said.

[mutinsfromthemoon]

ilya, troy and bood talking and troy asks “who’s your best friend? it has to be me or bood right?” and ilya’s like “wrong” and bood asks “if it’s not us who is it?” and ilya goes “my shanya obviously” and troy goes “your husband can’t be your best friend” at the exact same time bood says “fair” and ilya says “i’m telling harris that you don’t consider him your best friend” and troy’s face falls while boodram laughs

[jewelcoatfish]

shane looooovesss shaping ilya’s curls into hearts. the problem is they are curls, so a tiny action could send all his work to waste at once, so both shane and ilya has to be very very still for this whole ordeal. usually shane would find curls that already sort of faces each other and guide them to the desired position, but sometimes the curls beat him and he has to find another one. my point is, one time shane makes a whole head of heart curls (this is an exaggeration, he probably made 5 sporadically) on ilya and he snaps a photo of it. it has ilya’s lovesick eyes looking at him too and so it becomes shane’s homescreen wallpaper (his lockscreen is them hoisting the cup together, thank you very much).

they have a fun interview with harris one day and harris asks to see their lock and home screen photos. it goes semi viral on hockey twt and one of the most popular rt was “roz’s ass down horrendously bad for his husband his hair is proclaiming love lmfao”. that was retweeted by bood, accidentally, after laughing and showing it to cassie.

[snowsmoked]

I think that Ilya genuinely thinks Shane is mocking his accent when he copies it. And like. It's fine, its a funny accent, Ilya knows that. He knows it's still pretty thick (nice) for him living in English speaking countries for 10 years. But its whatever, he doesn't really care. If he did, he'd tell Shane to stop and he would stop. No big deal.

Until.

Ilya is watching Shane interact with Luca one day. Luca says something and Shane repeats it in Luca's Swiss accent. Luca doesn't really seem to notice or care. Shane isn't acting like he's making fun of Luca. And when Ilya comes over, he even says 'hey' in Luca's accent.

And Ilya then does some googling. He comes across the phrase 'echolalia' and reads the sentence: "-especially when individuals feel comfortable or have a strong relationship with the person they are imitating."

And Ilya realizes the first time he remembers Shane doing that was during their first time. He had worked so hard to make Shane feel safe and comfortable and he did and he has proof and now he has to go suck Shane's dick about it immediately.

[bees-reads]

After Shane and Ilya get married Ilya is so happy to finally change his pfp to be one of him and Shane. To piss Ilya off Hayden also changes his pfp to him and Shane. Cue different NHL players slowly changing their pfp to photos of them and Shane. It basically becomes and unspoken trend that when you enter the NHL you need to get a photo with Shane Hollander to change your pfp as a right of passage.

[gaynehollander]

Shane set out to learn Russian because he didn't want the burden of communicating in their second language to always fall on Ilya, by default. He also wanted to learn more about Ilya's culture through the language, he wanted to hear his husband make jokes in his mother tongue, to get to know the side of him that comes out entirely unimpeded when he doesn't have to filter himself through his second language. He expected to mostly use it at home, perhaps especially when Ilya was feeling overwhelmed. However, once Shane actually learns Russian to the point that he's fully conversational, they mostly use it to shit talk people in public.

[jewelcoatfish]

i just imagine the oldies at david’s mcgill hockey team is jealous as fuck like what do you MEAN his son and son in law are THE HOCKEY GUYS like the best ones. some of them tried to get their child to date a hockey player and didn’t even succeed but david hollander not only is the father of the best hockey player but also the father in law of the other best hockey player??? i swear he’s living the dream of some of his old teammates they hate to see a uni reunion coming

[hollandersbuttplug]

Times Ilya “quickshot” Rozanov came immediately:

-The first time Shane called him his husband in bed.

-Shane said “Don’t you fucking dare come, Rozanov. I’m not done with you yet.”

-Literally every anniversary sex they have.

-Someone knocked on their hotel door, which made Shane moan deeply while sucking him off.

-Shane, looking at him with the biggest wettest eyes, said “I still can’t believe I get to be yours for the rest of my life, I love you so much.”

-His lip that was split in the previous days game started bleeding and Shane licked it clean before biting it open again.

-He saw Shane’s wedding ring shining in the light as he was jerking Ilya off.

[melancholy1410]

Pre love confession cottage Hollanov is so fucking funny.

Shane invited his “casual” situationship of multiple years into his home to spend the summer together. Casually.

Ilya doesn’t want to be with anyone else other than his #1 rival. Because he’s like the best at sex. That’s just logical, wdym?

Shane doesn’t want the guy he’s fucking to marry anyone else. the guy he’s fucking agrees.

Shane is awake at night to plan the future. With his fuck buddy. together. he proceeds to wake the fuck buddy to tell him this, and he agrees on the spot.

[morganbritton132]

Dustin, halfway through a condescending lecture: -for all intents and purposes, we-

Steve: Makes no sense.

Dustin:

Dustin: What makes no sense?

Steve: Why would porpoises need a tent? They don't go camping. It makes no sense.

Dustin:

Dustin:

Robin: They don't even have hands

Steve: Exactly. How are they getting the flap open?

Steve: You need to think, Dustin.