Enslaver and Owner

[glumshoe]

A lot of people who self-identify as “chaotic good” mean that they always do what they think is right, no matter what, but… while theoretically I respect that, in practice, this often seems to manifest as people being self-righteously judgmental and impulsive and like… proud of that. Obviously applying D&D alignments outside of fiction - even outside of D&D - is ridiculous and unhelpful, but I routinely see people describing themselves as “chaotic good” when they just behave rashly and without regard to actual consequences.

[ripleybeatsthor-deactivated2019]

Over and above the ridiculous label of chaotic good for a real person…I can’t relate to the concept of being happy/proud to reduce myself down to two words.

Like. I got a caldron of gloop inside of me, come taste the entrails of insecurity and four year old croutons that were made with flours of generosity.

This pot self stirs.

And I’ve never made the same recipe twice.

[enslaverandowner]

Someone who will always do what they think is right is not the same as what they think is good. Those people should identify as chaotic neutral.

[dumbbigtittedslut-deactivated20]

Is there such thing as a vi rating butt plug??

If there’s a sex toy, there’s a vibrating version of it.

I have vibrating pasties, ffs.

[putyourlustinme-deactivated2018]

I highly recommend the B-Vibe rimming plug. Vibrates and rotates. 🤤🤤

[dumbbigtittedslut-deactivated20]

Well THAT sounds fun.

[enslaverandowner]

I’d say it’s about a 6 out of 10.

[enslavedwhore-deactivated201908]

What am i?

Sometimes i want to be wrapped around Your ankles like an adder. i want to be low, to be a shadow when You tell me what i am. Tell me what You see, tell me what spikes that sharpness of possessiveness inside You when You think of me. Define me, i need to be told. What am i?

You know why. You know i don’t feel like a woman, i was denied the opportunity to grow; infantilised and treated like a child by everyone i knew and it has made me this fractured underdeveloped adult unable to make a claim on the age i am now.

You know.

You see this expressed in the way i react to Your touch, i am inferior in every way; the way i move, the way i speak, the way i think and the way i understand what it is to be touched. i am still the girl who opens her legs when told and i remain confused at what lies between them and why men like it so much. Only with You it is also about what is in my head too and how it all connects; the mushroom cloud to the nuclear bomb. 

Even now, years after we first met i place a trust in You as though You’re the adult in the room, my immaturity still quivering shyly and trustingly as You handle me roughly and savagely. i am still the girl and because of it i don’t know what i do to You, i do not understand what i am, what these broken pieces stir inside You. You react to me as though i am something to be devoured, just like the women i see everywhere, but i am not the women i have seen, i am not them with that assured sway to their hips or the knowing twitch pulling at their lips when speaking, i am not those women who exude a femininity in unthinking gestures or subconscious mannerisms. i am a ghost and an imposter, not deserving of the title of woman - what am i? my small frame and skinny body only ever contributing to this strange lacuna that finds me unripe. Because when i look in the mirror i don’t see a woman, i see awkwardness and holes where understanding should be. What is this thing i am? What is it to You? i can’t expect the core of my body or sexual awareness to equal that of any woman i have seen, the years of oppression took care of any true entitlement to my womanhood. i am lacking and yet You are here. Why would You pick someone so incomplete? i am not a woman, but You touch me as though i am or how i imagine people grope and scratch at things they want, i get consumed by You like i belong under a title i am not aligned with. You are the only person i trust to tell me, to explain what i am and why You don’t miss the things that are missing.

What if never catch up. And what if i do?

[enslaverandowner]

You are so beautifully pure, you are like an oasis in the desert...and all around the lone and level sands stretch far away

[desires-of-a-dominant-man-deact]

BDSM Links And Resources

I thought I would update the list of BDSM links and resources I posted a while ago, as some links were no longer working and I had several new ones to add, including a list of books. These should be particularly helpful to those who are new to BDSM and looking to explore D/s relationships, as the best way to go about that is to first read everything you can and then read even more! Not only will this allow you to educate yourself, help keep you safe and avoid any potential mistakes or regrets, but also the more you understand something, the less intimidating it will seem.

If you have anything to add, please don’t hesitate to let me know and I will update this list, in particular if there any books that a submissive might find helpful or informative, as most of the books I have read or included are intended for Dominants.

Note: For the sake of consistency and readability, I have used capitals throughout this document and have not used lower case when referring to submissives or slaves.

Websites:

Babygirls ‘n’ Daddy Doms: Website dedicated to littles, babygirls and Daddy Doms, with a lot of useful information on the subject.

Collarme: A free BDSM dating website and community, that is probably the most popular and a better option than the commercial alternatives.

DS Arts: Academy of DS Arts, fairly self explanatory.

Evil Monk: Ambrosio’s BDSM Website, featuring many useful articles.

Fetlife: An online BDSM community that I would highly recommend and which is perhaps best described as Facebook for the kinky, allowing users to create a profile, publish photos or writing and join interest groups where you can ask questions.

Kink Academy: An online resource with many educational and instructional videos on various aspects of BDSM, although users must pay a small fee to access all of the content.

Submissive Guide: As the name suggests, this is an online resource for submissives.

The Iron Gate: A general BDSM online resource, with many aticles, essays and even stories on the subject.

Dating and Relationships:

10 Principles For Healthy 24/7 D/s And M/s (Source: sexgeek.wordpress.com)

Difference of Dynamics in BDSM (Source: the-little-kitten.tumblr.com)

Finding Your Dominant (Source: asubmissivesjourney.com)

How To Find A Partner (Source: Jack Rinella / leathernews.com)

Initiating a Discussion About BDSM Interest with a Vanilla Partner Part 1 (Source: submissiveguide.com)

Initiating a Discussion About BDSM Interest with a Vanilla Partner Part 2 (Source: submissiveguide.com)

Initiating a Discussion About BDSM Interest with a Vanilla Partner Part 3 (Source: submissiveguide.com)

So You Want Your Boyfriend To Dominate You (Source: domwithpen.tumblr.com)

So Your Girlfriend Wants You To Dominate Her (Source: domwithpen.tumblr.com)

The Unfortunate But Common Misconceptions About DD/lg Relationships (Source: a-lolitas-life.tumblr.com)

Play:

Consent Is Mandatory And Non-Negotiable (Source: fortheloveofasub.tumblr.com)

Food Play (Source: bdsmsadomasochism.tumblr.com)

How (and Why) To Go Down On Your Submissive (Source: domwithpen.tumblr.com)

Initial Steps Into Orgasm on Command Training (Source: submissiveguide.com)

Rules and Tasks for Building Confidence (Source: themostdangerousplaything.tumblr.com)

Tools of Consent in BDSM (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Training in D/s - Why? (Source: her-master.tumblr.com)

Training in D/s - How? (Source: her-master.tumblr.com)

Training in D/s - Thoughts And Concerns (Source: her-master.tumblr.com)

Wax Play (Source: bdsmsadomasochism.tumblr.com)

Safety:

Basics Of Safe, Sane And Consensual Power Exchange (Source: Molly Devon / the-iron-gate.com)

Common Sense (Source: Sean R. Powell / the-iron-gate.com)

Emotional Safety (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Offline/Online BDSM Safety Rules (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Ouch Is Not A Safe Word: Safe Words, Limits, and Scene Protocol (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Rules For Meeting Strangers (Source: Jack Rinella / leathernews.com)

Safewords and Safesigns 101 (Source: kinkology.tumblr.com)

S.S.C. VS R.A.C.K. (Source: Justin Medlin / the-iron-gate.com)

Checklists, Communication and Negotiation:

BDSM Play Partner Check List (Source: Sovereign House / the-iron-gate.com)

BDSM Scene Negotiations (Source: daddyvinnie.tumblr.com)

Can I Get That In Writing: Basics of Negotiations (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Communication (Source: submissivesupportgroup.tumblr.com)

If I Ever See Another Checklist I Will Scream: An Extremely Thorough Play Checklist (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Negotiation Forms (Source: Jay Wiseman, SM 101: A Realistic Introduction / greenerypress.com)

What Are Negotiations Good For? (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Sub Drop and Aftercare:

Aftercare for submissives (Source: Mistress Abode / brairthornblog.wordpress.com)

Aftercare for Dominants (Source: Mistress Abode / brairthornblog.wordpress.com)

Aftercare for Switches (Source: Mistress Abode / brairthornblog.wordpress.com)

Emergency Self-Administered Aftercare (Source: Mistress Abode / brairthornblog.wordpress.com)

Sub Drop (Source: David Williams / subshelpingsubs.tripod.com)

Sub Drop and Aftercare (Source: desires-of-a-domimant-man.tumblr.com)

Dominance and Dominants:

A Dominant is NOT… (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Advice to a Novice Dom (Source: Washington Sexuality University / the-iron-gate.com)

Advice to a Novice Dominant (Source: cherhatton.tumblr.com)

An Open Letter To A Novice Dom (Source: evilmonk.org)

Qualities of A Successful Dominant (Source: Polly Peachum / the-iron-gate.com)

Daddy Doms: They’re Not What You Think (Source: edenfantasys.com)

Domination for Nice Guys (Source: Franklin Veaux / the-iron-gate.com)

How To Spot A Non Dominant (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Learning To Be A Dom (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Run Don’t Walk: Warning Signs of A Predator Dom/me Part 1 (Source: submissiveguide.com)

Run Don’t Walk: Warning Signs of A Predator Dom/me Part 2 (Source: submissiveguide.com)

Red Flags, Warning Signs, and Intuition: Learning to Trust You Instincts - Part One: Dominants (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

The Dominant (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

What Is A Daddy Dom? (Source: babygirlsndaddydoms.webs.com)

What Makes A Good Dominant (Source: Kim Debron / kimdebron.tripod.com)

What Should A Dominant Be (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Submission and Submissives:

10 Considerations For Inexperienced Subs (Source: fortheloveofasub.tumblr.com)

A Submissive Bill of Rights (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

A Submissive’s Creed (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

A Submissive’s Ethics (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Introduction To Submission (Source: Kim Debron / kimdebron.tripod.com)

Learning to Trust Your Instincts (Source: bewildbetruebekinkybeyou.tumblr.com)

Red Flags, Warning Signs, and Intuition: Learning to Trust You Instincts- Part 2: Submissives/Slaves (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Some Rules For The Submissive (Source: daddylookingforhisbaby.tumblr.com)

Submissive Owner’s Manual (Source: youmadememe.tumblr.com)

Ten Tips For The Novice, Heterosexual submissive Woman (Source: Jay Wiseman / the-iron-gate.com)

Warning Signs for Submissives (Source: RC Bauer / the-iron-gate.com)

What Is A Babygirl? (Source: babygirlsndaddydoms.webs.com)

Books:

BDSM: The Naked Truth by Dr Charley Ferrer

Dear Raven and Joshua: Questions and Answers About Master/Slave Relationships by Joshua Tenpenny and Raven Kaldera

Devil in the Details I: The Art of Mastery, A Mentoring Trilogy - The Master, The Slave, The Power by LT Morrison

Devil in the Details II: The Art of Mastery, A Mentoring Trilogy - Mastery Refine: The Issues, The Skills by LT Morrison

Devil in the Details III: The Art of Mastery, A Mentoring Trilogy - Sustainable Structure and Traning by LT Morrison

Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission by William Brame, Gloria Brame and Jon Jacobs

Living M/s: A Book for Masters, slaves and Their Relationships by Dan and Dawn Williams

Master/slave Relations: Handbook of Theory and Practice by Robert Rubel

Master/slave Relations: Communications 401 by Robert Rubel

Master/slave Relations: Solutions 402, Living in Harmony by Robert Rubel

Protocols: A Variety of Views by Robert Rubel

Real Service by Joshua Tenpenny and Raven Kaldera

Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism by Phillp Miller and Molly Devon

SM101: A Realistic Introduction by Jay Wiseman

The Control Book by Peter Masters

The Loving Dominant by John and Libby Warren

The New Bottoming Book by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy.

The New Topping Book by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy.

The Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play and the Erotic Edge by Tristan Taormino

This Curious Human Phenomenon: An Exploration of Some Uncommonly Explored Aspects of BDSM by Peter Masters

Where I Am Led: A Service Exploration Workbook by Christina Parker

[lovettehabilis]

Quelques liens

[enslaverandowner]

Saving for later.

[enslavedwhore-deactivated201908]

Dodos.

i like the nest of You.

i like inside jokes and conversations without words. i like play fighting, beer sharing, food swapping, story telling and washing each other’s skin in the shower. i like bad films and even worse jokes, cold nights and warm feet. i like being medicine for Your stress; fingertips in hair and on shoulders as You work. i like forgetting what day it is and failing to get out of bed early. i like being inhaled in desperate gulps and knowing sweating only makes it worse.   i like mutual lashings of attention, divine passion and dark secrets that no-one else will ever know. i like fry ups at midnight and biscuits in bed. i like unashamed exclusivity, introversion, isolation and sweet sickening intimacy. i like quiet kindness, gentle kisses and unrepentant adoration. i like our otherness in the face of the mundane.

i like the nest for extinct birds. i like the nest no-one else can visit.

[enslaverandowner]

I like it most when you shrink but grow; where like a tended garden, your tendrils grab every part of what is near you; when, like a bonsai tree, you wear the evidence in your modifications in your shape, but shine with intricate and shaped beauty. You have a home; you have a place; and you have a symbiotic relationship with it. You nourish the thing that nourishes you, and both are more together than apart.

I like your services and your soul, and wind both around my fingers until you are both what was you and a part of me. You are my instrument and my perfection, and I take a pride in both the lushness of the garden and the firmness of the walls.

You are my garden and my oasis, and I carry you within me; you bring shade in harsh suns, and green to the desert. One day we will die, and like Ozymandias our works will turn to sand. Until then we are glorious, and together we are bound. Let us grow more and more into each other, always falling towards the darkness of eventual oblivion but transfixed by each other’s eyes. 

Mine, owned, and loved.

[enslaverandowner]

I sometimes think about what our house will look like when we are old. I think about learning how to grow tomatoes, the kind that are so sweet I know You'll want to eat them like an apple like we did when we were cycling. I think about Your face, how it might age and if I'll shrink so much that You will still find me cute at 88. I think about still travelling, doing as much as we can physically for as long as we can. I think about dancing. Two old people still madly in love, swaying to songs that remind them of a time when we had the energy to cycle the world and climb mountains. I think about keeping Your slippers warm on the radiator so when You come inside, You'll always have warm feet. I think about laughing in bed. Still having the ability to lock the world out. I think about dying together. I can't imagine not going at the same time. I want my wrinkled hand in Yours, cradled by You even in those last moments. I just want You, that's all. Yours

@enslavedwhore

It’s days like today where it feels very good to be served by such a beautiful woman.

[enslaverandowner]

I’m truly impressed by how imposing Buck Angel is in this shot.

[enslavedwhore-deactivated201908]

Dead fish for fucking.

I recall it. Sitting in geography class, hearing teenage boys sniggering about girls that just lay there like “dead fish” beneath them. I can bring to mind their saliva soaked lips spitting jokes about my friend’s breasts and talk of girls that were substandard at sucking their adolescent cocks. They branded us whores or prudes - no place in between. I knew I fell in with the latter. How confusing to crave their approval despite hating their boyish groping hands and insecure smiles. The truth was I didn’t want boys, I wanted something else, not sex but certainly my pulse would spike for male teachers who almost exclusively seemed more interested in me than anyone else ever had been. But I carried their cruel summation of girls with me. I carried it like a backpack that had been sewn into my skin. I carried it when older boys sweated onto my stomach as they thrusted wildly into my painfully still teenage body. I carried it as men too old to be touching me, explored that space between my thighs and rubbed their erections onto my fifteen year old skin, all whilst I failed to reciprocate or give a sign I was present. I was always so confusingly unmoved.  Those boys had joked but in truth my sexual lifelessness did become a brand and welt upon my back for men to judge. I was the boring fuck who failed to elicit fantasies of women who belong in porn with their eager holes and apparent lack of self respect. I was a clam. A mollusc hiding in my shell wondering why these men didn’t know what dwelled inside until I wondered myself if there was anything really there to discover. Years. Years of this. But I also recall Your grin. The one that spread across Your lips as You read the nervousness that twitched and tortured me, no person had ever smiled at this before. I remember seeing You witness my silence and my waiting body; interpreting that as an opportunity instead of an incompetence. Have I ever mentioned what it felt like? That first time when You took over, when You pinned me to that uncomfortable mattress and said I was such a good girl for not resisting. How You felt me melt just then, as though I was the fairytale princess locked inside a tower of her own making, finally freed not by a chaste kiss but a bruising kind of control no one had thought to administer. I’d never needed too much kindness, I’d never needed gentle caresses or fumbling hands in the dark. You knew. You understood so well how I was still because I was waiting, still because I’m unable to be anything but a vessel to be used, to be ordered and trained. I cannot be another thing. My passion does not exist for men that lack the ability to scare me, to force me, to hold me down and glory in my fight or lack thereof. The brand acquired all those years ago was wrong. I am no prude or useless fuck, if such things exists at all. I am a clockwork toy, I always was. The moment You told me that You cherish my obedience, my natural tendency to wait for Your command, my inability to take initiative….it was the moment You gave me a new brand. Submissive.

[enslaverandowner]

One of the reasons I chose you: you have the best words.

[enslavedwhore-deactivated201908]

I know words. I’ve got the best words.

[enslaverandowner]

You’ve got the goodest talk.

[enslavedwhore-deactivated201908]

Dead fish for fucking.

I recall it. Sitting in geography class, hearing teenage boys sniggering about girls that just lay there like “dead fish” beneath them. I can bring to mind their saliva soaked lips spitting jokes about my friend’s breasts and talk of girls that were substandard at sucking their adolescent cocks. They branded us whores or prudes - no place in between. I knew I fell in with the latter. How confusing to crave their approval despite hating their boyish groping hands and insecure smiles. The truth was I didn’t want boys, I wanted something else, not sex but certainly my pulse would spike for male teachers who almost exclusively seemed more interested in me than anyone else ever had been. But I carried their cruel summation of girls with me. I carried it like a backpack that had been sewn into my skin. I carried it when older boys sweated onto my stomach as they thrusted wildly into my painfully still teenage body. I carried it as men too old to be touching me, explored that space between my thighs and rubbed their erections onto my fifteen year old skin, all whilst I failed to reciprocate or give a sign I was present. I was always so confusingly unmoved.  Those boys had joked but in truth my sexual lifelessness did become a brand and welt upon my back for men to judge. I was the boring fuck who failed to elicit fantasies of women who belong in porn with their eager holes and apparent lack of self respect. I was a clam. A mollusc hiding in my shell wondering why these men didn’t know what dwelled inside until I wondered myself if there was anything really there to discover. Years. Years of this. But I also recall Your grin. The one that spread across Your lips as You read the nervousness that twitched and tortured me, no person had ever smiled at this before. I remember seeing You witness my silence and my waiting body; interpreting that as an opportunity instead of an incompetence. Have I ever mentioned what it felt like? That first time when You took over, when You pinned me to that uncomfortable mattress and said I was such a good girl for not resisting. How You felt me melt just then, as though I was the fairytale princess locked inside a tower of her own making, finally freed not by a chaste kiss but a bruising kind of control no one had thought to administer. I’d never needed too much kindness, I’d never needed gentle caresses or fumbling hands in the dark. You knew. You understood so well how I was still because I was waiting, still because I’m unable to be anything but a vessel to be used, to be ordered and trained. I cannot be another thing. My passion does not exist for men that lack the ability to scare me, to force me, to hold me down and glory in my fight or lack thereof. The brand acquired all those years ago was wrong. I am no prude or useless fuck, if such things exists at all. I am a clockwork toy, I always was. The moment You told me that You cherish my obedience, my natural tendency to wait for Your command, my inability to take initiative….it was the moment You gave me a new brand. Submissive.

[enslaverandowner]

One of the reasons I chose you: you have the best words.

[enslaverandowner]

I can tell this is an old meme, because it doesn’t just say “girlfriend”.

[youuknowthatyouwant2]

The perks of dating me

- Cuddles - I’m hilarious - Honesty 100% - I won’t cheat because I hate everyone - Surprise hugs - Random kisses - Actually respond to your texts

- More cuddles

- We can eat lots of snacks

[enslaverandowner]

@enslavedwhore: it’s not bad, but you offering all of that plus a little’s teary adorableness, a sexy slight nervousness keeping you by my side, a travel companion, and slave services with sexual and non-sexual service on tap? Well, you know, you ask why I’m happy. Secretly I think you know.

[ourcamplife]

Photo by: @an_khoai #ourcamplife

[enslaverandowner]

@enslavedwhore, this makes me hunger for the road.

[eucytus-deactivated20170531]

If anyone in BDSM is trying to remember the meaning of consent, just remember F.R.I.E.S. 

Forced/Fearful.

Regressed to a childlike state.

Insecure/indecisive.

EXPLOITABLE.

Sexualized.

F.R.I.E.S. :)

[enslaverandowner]

@enslavedwhore: Discuss approvingly, with examples.

[arsenicinshell]

Interior of rococo period Pullman car. late 1800s

[enslaverandowner]

Interestingly, you can see the extremely flashy forerunner of airline overhead bins.

[writing-prompt-s]

Your Tumblr username decides your profession. How is your first day at work?

[lids-flutter-open]

I walk in the forest 🌳

[crimelords]

I rob a bank! kill a lawman! my gal is my getaway driver! we drink bootleg gin and listen to josephine baker

[istanbl]

I’m a city. just like… the whole city.

[matlsse]

i own! and curate! a museum with every! matisse! piece! ever!

[reynaruina-deactivated20170225]

I’m the Queen of Doom

[dracophile]

I’m Charlie Weasley?

[clockworkcanary]

I am a decorative steampunk bird, repurposed to detect deadly conditions in a coal mine.

:D

[vaspider]

i live in the Digital Web, a retro 90s idealization of the internets

[nightshadeis]

I’m nightshade, because nightshadeis me.

[emberkyrlee]

I’m professionally myself, but with a cooler name?

Can I get paid to just fuck around and be me all day? That sounds great.

[thefreemanmd-deactivated2018120]

Well starting an inter-dimensional war be accident means it can only go up from there, eventually (we hope).

[digitalswitchgamine]

I only have seven thoughts all day. Productivity is at an all time low.

[undersleeper]

I didn’t get enough sleep the night before. That’s… pretty much how every day goes for me in reality; if I could get paid just for that, without my actual job’s responsibilities, I think that’d be pretty great.

[amhypnotic]

Ya know?  Things just seem to keep going my way. And everyone I’ve been talking to just seems so peaceful! This is quite a nice place to be, wouldn’t you agree?

[trancingwithmyself]

I spend all day at my desk looking at spirals

[soundshypnotic]

Come to my shop where I make, curate, and sell that which sounds more lovely than you could have imagined. Careful though, it’s easy to get lost just listening, and listening, and listening…you never know what might slip into your head while you enjoy my wares.

[enslavedwhore-deactivated201908]

Oppressive.

[enslaverandowner]

My first day at work, surprisingly, is spent setting up slave priority storage media on old PCs.

[liz-cat-meow-deactivated2020011]

[enslaverandowner]

@enslavedwhore, I’m tempted to have this printed on a crop top for you.

[preciouslyinnocent]

[enslaverandowner]

Eh heh.