Externalvs.InternalStimuli

Existence precludes Essence.

[existentialintegration]

My first Lion’s Mane in the grow. Lion’s Mane is my favorite medicinal mushroom. It’s also super tasty- supposed to mimic the flavor of crab/seafood. Vegans love to make mock crab cakes out of it. After giving up opioids, benzodiazepines, and alcohol- Lion’s Mane extract propelled me through my return to academia. I just completed my chemistry and neuroscience degree after years of drug abuse. Anything is possible. Lion’s Mane promotes neurogenesis in the adult brain- especially in the hippocampus (an area often damaged by excess drug intake). Research in the early 90′s in Japan indicated Lion’s Mane can regress symptoms of dementia and Alzheimer’s. I would recommend Lion’s Mane tincture or capsules to anyone in active recovery from synthesized substance dependence. Why? It’s safe for daily consumption. It’s even considered safe by most medical professionals for breast feeding mothers. 

[existentialintegration]

Shiitakes, day 7, in my grow. My first time producing shiitake blocks. 100% organic. Pretty happy with the turn out. Massive first flushes. Follow me on instagram @delicioususproduce (name will change/denied post-trademark analysis). Located here in Indianapolis, IN. 

[existentialintegration]

Yesterday in Bowling, Green IN I was blessed with the appearance of white chanterelles, cantharellus subalbidus. I was also fortunate to stumble upon a massive maitake/hen of the woods growing out of a stump just above my head on the creek ridge. I’m estimating it weighs 5-10 pounds but will weigh later today. Beautiful chicken of the woods were present as well as some very eye catching pholiota squarrosa aka chestnut mushrooms. 

[existentialintegration]

My first harvest of my own home grown golden oysters (pleurotus citrinopileatus)! They are a tropical variety. They prefer 90-100% RH and 70-80 degrees Fahrenheit during their grow cycle. If sautéed only a few minutes- the flavor is bitter and disagreeable. If sautéed 15-20 minutes a cashew/nutty flavor emerges. The color is gorgeous! The intensity of the color I’ve read to be directly related to the available light. This is new to me as most mushrooms don’t prefer direct sunlight.   

[existentialintegration]

9/22/20

“about 90 million tons of food are wasted each year in the EU,” 

student in my chemistry class, “just to play devil’s advocate- shouldn’t we want CRISPR to fail because isn’t our population already too high. we lack the resources to support all the children.” 

cognitive dissonance COGNITIVE dissonance cognitive DISSONANCE 

source: https://www.mdpi.com/2076-3921/10/8/1264

[existentialintegration]

Some fun photos from my summer mushroom foraging experience here in Indiana. Gold and cinnabar red chanterelles, horn of plenty, old man of the woods, Tawny milkcap/chichitake, pleurotus ostreatus/oyster. More to come. Probably was blessed with around 15-20 pounds of chanterelles this season. 

[existentialintegration]

3/16/21

To fall into one’s self  seems to be the cycle. 

Would extra attention be the answer? 

I’d like to meet someone who  still does things without posting about it. 

[existentialintegration]

2/15/21

The phosphorescing screen in front of the child parallels the moth towards the light- quite literally, the developing neurons under such strong wavelength stimuli have no conscious debate over to look or not to look. Therefore, does the thalamus of the child today receive opportunity to develop conscious control over screen time? The linear correlation of decreased attention spans have my head spinning as I exist in a world of apathetic evaders. 

[existentialintegration]

9/7/2020

Will the lioness eat the tired gazelle? Will the ocean pull in the loose sand? Will the wind knock-over that without solid footing? Will the fire lick the fallen debris? Will eyes land on the illuminated?

Will the exploited man rape the vulnerable woman? 

[existentialintegration]

9/6/2020

Like the itch of a cricket leg- never satisfied. 

[existentialintegration]

9/5/2020

I know what he saw in me- codependency and unwarranted self-pity. I disgusted him and presented an opportunity all the same.

[existentialintegration]

9/4/2020

In recollection the roughest moments are not the actions which led to this trauma but the methods in which I handled them.  In the fleeting time afterwards, vengeance appears in the illusion of  justice and retribution the only route to recovery.  

[existentialintegration]

9/4/2020

Trend setters do not change themselves- they establish a change for everyone else. 

[existentialintegration]

8/8/2020

Trying to explain to my mom why abandoning the fear or imprisonment is necessary to feel a true sense of freedom. This fear being one of the ultimate conditioning practices taking place in our youth. Oh- the years I’d spend locked up if only for a momentary taste of true liberation.  

[existentialintegration]

7/25/20

At first- it seemed professors were revealing insecurity through the constant attempt to relate to their younger students via childish innuendos and menial pop cultures references but then the pandemic happened and the larger reality hit. These professors are as embedded in apathy as the students they attempt to relate to. They too have invested all input in social media and fleeting gratification and have either forgotten, or never actually known, what it means to seek a freed conscious. 

[existentialintegration]

7/15/20

Here’s something- if Jim Jefferies’ bit on selfies in his special ‘Intolerable’ made you laugh and yet you’ve since posted a selfie and/or liked someone else’s selfie your cognitive dissonance has expanded into loss of consciousness. 

[existentialintegration]

7/1/2020

“There is a secret bond between slowness and memory, between speed and forgetting.

A man is walking down the street. At a certain moment, he tries to recall something, but the recollection escapes him. Automatically, he slows down.

Meanwhile, a person who wants to forget a disagreeable incident he has just lived through starts unconsciously to speed up his pace, as if he were trying to distance himself from a thing still too close to him in time.

In existential mathematics that experience takes the form of two basic equations: The degree of slowness is directly proportional to the intensity of memory; the degree of speed is directly proportional to the intensity of forgetting.”

― Milan Kundera, Slowness