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“I’ll turn into bugs, don’t make me do it.”

Tip: you can microwave stale croissant for 15-20 seconds and it will become soft and warm and nice. Cut it open, put butter in it. Peace and love

evil-tips

Tip: you can refrigerate stale croissant for 3-6 hours and it will become mushy and cold and unpleasant. It won't cut well, so just put a big clump of cold, hard butter on it. Strife and hatred.

maidthings

Tip: you can do nothing to a stale croissant for any arbitrary length of time and it will remain as is. Do not cut it, or add butter. Stasis and stagnation.

muffinrag

Tip: actually, if you do nothing to a stale croissant, it will grow a fluffy bread mold with many potential colors (white, green, etc), which, if left long enough, will consume the entire croissant for you. I would not advise cutting it. Adding butter may get you a second type of mold. Decay and rot.