Dear writers of European nobility,
Popular culture has merged the maid with the lady in waiting. You asked your lady in waiting for advice on suitors and politics, not your maid. Maids were commoners. You could ask/bribe them to give you some information- like who was sneaking around with who or if someone had a drinking problem- but you didn’t trust them to give you political advice. Ladies in waiting were nobility themselves, and had the qualifications to give such advice. Many members of the nobility were expected to have the upper nobles and how they connected to each other memorized!
Someone as low as a Baron’s daughter wouldn’t have a lady in waiting necessarily, but she would probably aspire to be one for a higher noble. She might ask her maid for advice and be closer with her maid. Barons were practically commoners themselves, in most cases. But a duke’s daughter wouldn’t. Also, a duke’s daughter would have multiple ladies in waiting. A princess or queen would have a whole fleet of them!
Finally, your maid might not have been with you since you were young. It was a job, and people came and went just like any other. The fact that maids were typically not allowed to marry meant that many eventually left your service to start their own family. Not to mention, you didn’t necessarily bring your maid with you when you moved to the capital. You used the maids in the capital. (Some people just stayed in the royal palace, while others had two sets of servants- one for each residence.)
Contrast that with a fellow noble you’ve known most of your life, whose house is probably sworn to yours. She might be a younger sister or a cousin. You can understand why a person would trust their lady in waiting more.
