A while back, I called for a Lyft ride home from the airport. The lyft pulled up, he called my name, and I opened the door and climbed in. While I was climbing in he was getting out, which I didnāt realize until he opened the back door on the other side.
Him: Iāll put your bag in the trunk.
Me: Oh, thereās no need.Ā
Him: Iāll just put it back there.Ā
Me: I prefer to keep my bag with me.
I was also still holding onto it so he couldnāt just grab it, and when I saidĀ āI prefer to keep it with meā this cloud of rage crossed his face.
Him: Then get out.Ā
Me: Excuse me?
Him: Get out, I donāt want your bag fucking up my upholstery.
Now, this was a weekender ā essentially an upscale duffle bag. Small, almost brand new, easily fitting on the middle-seat beside me. I donāt know if he was just really intense about his upholstery or if he was running some kind of scam, but either way I now DEFINITELY was not going to let him separate me from my bag.
So I saidĀ āOkay,ā and I picked up my bag and got out, took out my phone, and cancelled him as my driver.
He looked at me like Iād grown a second head. There was this moment of total disconnect in his face, and then he started ranting about how someone had damaged his upholstery and they needed to put their bags in the back and he wasnāt going to have me getting his upholstery dirty.Ā
I said,Ā āIām out of your car. Drive on, Iāll get another,ā and held up my phone.
This had clearly never happened before ā it looked like plenty of people had thought āThis guy is crazyā but went the āso Iād better let him do what he wantsā route instead of āso Iām getting out of his carā. Which is totally normal! Weāre socialized to prioritize ānot making a sceneā over personal safety. But when you do call that bluff, when you defy the social convention that the other person is counting on to make you do what they want you to do, they donāt know how to react, which gives you time for a clean getaway. And maybe he thought I was a dickhead but what do I care what an asshole thinks of me?Ā
Anyway the moral of the story is yes, you should know that you can almost always leave a situation and often itās in your best interest to do so.Ā
(Right after I called for another car he picked up a fare using Quick Match or whatever itās called, peeled out of the Lyft lane, and hit another car well nigh immediately.)
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