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How Klaus and Kol sabotage Rebekah's love life: Part 7
The Final Straw
(Rebekah storms out of the restaurant.)
Rebekah: HE THINKS YOU’RE MY BODYGUARDS.
Kol: That’s insulting. I’d never dress this nicely for employment.
Klaus: I was protecting you.
Rebekah: You interrogated him about hypothetical betrayals in the year 2070!
Klaus: Long-term thinking is important.
Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9 / Part 10 / Part 11 / Part 12 / Part 13 / Part 14 / Part 15 / Part 16
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live michael reaction:
How Kol and Klaus sabotage Rebekah's love life: Part 6
(Later, outside.)
Kol: He seems harmless.
Klaus: That’s worse. Harmless men become disappointing husbands.
Kol: Nik, she wants normal.
Klaus: We don’t do normal.
Kol: I know that. Doesn't mean we can't play her fantasy for a while.
How Kol and Klaus sabotage Rebekah's love life: Part 5
Kol: So, what are your intentions with our sister?
Date: I— we just met.
Klaus: Wrong answer already.
Rebekah: I will end both of you. Permanently.
Kol: She says that with love.
How Kol and Klaus sabotage Rebekah's love life: Part 4
(Klaus suddenly appears at the table.)
Klaus: Hello, sister. Random coincidence seeing you here.
Rebekah: Niklaus, leave.
Kol: (appearing beside him) We’re just ensuring emotional safety.
Date: …Are you her brothers?
Klaus & Kol: Yes.
Date: I understand fear now.
How Kol and Klaus sabotage Rebekah's love life: Part 3
(Across the street, both brothers hiding badly.)
Kol: You’re standing in direct moonlight.
Klaus: I look intimidating.
Kol: You look like a dramatic gargoyle.
Klaus: Silence. He laughed. Why is he laughing?
Kol: Because Rebekah told a joke?
Klaus: ...How dare he?
How Kol and Klaus sabotage Rebekah's love life: Part 2
(Rebekah’s date arrives.)
Klaus: He walks like a man with secrets.
Kol: He walks like a man with knees, calm down.
Klaus: I don’t trust his jawline.
Kol: You’ve murdered people for less.
Klaus: Exactly.
How Kol and Klaus sabotage Rebekah's love life: Part 1
Kol: Step one: we observe discreetly.
Klaus: I am incapable of discreet.
Kol: Then stand farther away and brood artistically.
Klaus: I always brood artistically.
Kol: That’s not a skill, Nik, that’s a warning label.
Now we have Elijah assigning VERY specific survival instructions: 1.0
Elijah: I will be gone for several hours.
To Klaus: Do not kill anyone.
To Rebekah: Do not burn the house down.
To Kol: Do not die.
To Finn: And Finn… do not kill yourself.
Kol: What's up sluts! Guess who just came back from the dead again!
Klaus: Sluts?
Elijah: You died?!
Rebekah: Again?!
*Earlier that day*
The Chaotic Duo: Part 4
Kol: I wrote a note.
Klaus: What does it say?
Kol: “Dear Elijah, please meet me in the courtyard. Urgent.”
Klaus: Signed?
Kol: You.
Klaus: Diabolical.
(Elijah storms back inside minutes later.)
Elijah: You were not in the courtyard.
Klaus: Tragic misunderstanding.
Kol: Perhaps you missed him.
Elijah: I will dagger one of you. I haven’t decided which.
Klaus: Put it to a vote.
The Chaotic Duo: Part 3
Kol: Hypothetically… how attached is Elijah to that suit collection?
Klaus: Emotionally or spiritually?
Kol: Both.
Klaus: Deeply. Why?
Kol: I enchanted one tie so it screams when he tightens it.
(Upstairs)
Elijah: What in God’s—
Klaus: *whispers* Worth it.
Kol: Absolutely worth it.
Kol & Klaus:
Chaotic Duo: Part 2
Klaus: Why is the house on fire?
Kol: Technically it’s only the west wing.
Klaus: Why is the west wing on fire?
Kol: Science.
Klaus: That word does not mean what you think it means.
Kol: It means “run before Elijah gets home.”
*the sound of Elijah's patience snapping could be heard from across the mansion*
Chaotic Duo: Part 1
Kol: Admit it. Life would be terribly dull without me.
Klaus: Life would be peaceful without you.
Kol: Exactly. Dull.
Klaus: You are a walking catastrophe.
Kol: And yet you keep me around.
Klaus: Someone has to make Elijah look sane.
Family reunion
Klaus: "Do you ever get tired of pretending you care?"
Elijah: "No. I get tired of people being idiots."
Klaus: "So… me, then."
Elijah: "Precisely. You're the highlight of my exhaustion."
The Two Princesses: Part 2.
Stefan: “Do you ever think about us… the past?”
Klaus: “I do. And I savor it.”
Stefan: “Savor it?”
Klaus: “Yes. The chaos. The blood. The fun. You.”
*manic laughter in the background*
