itsa me, marsio

mars | they/them | 23

[angelnumber27]

Hey bitches. Let’s fuck Monday hard

[angelnumber27]

Hey bitches. Let’s fuck Tuesday hard

[angelnumber27]

Celibacy Wednesday

[angelnumber27]

Hey bitches. Let’s fuck Thursday hard

[halondrus]

women keep coming up to me giggling and blushing and running their finger along the edge of my mighty greatsword like STOP theres literally evil afoot

[moldavite]

are we sure the only way out is through? like. are we sure we can't just. go around

[auckie]

What if you poked me in the chest and your finger broke through like you were cracking into a rotted plank of wood and dust came out and I just crumpled into nothing and my spores got into your nose

[kelleysroom-deactivated20200511]

I would not hang out with you again that's for sure!

[auckie]

Well there you have it!

[largishcat]

anyone else get embarrassed when their self indulgent daydreams are like too self-indulgent? like oh jeez the telepaths are going to judge me

[library-seraph]

#ah so when you’re not Catholic you think it’s telepaths lol

[normal-horoscopes]

Sentences that explain like 70% of America

[sandmandaddy69]

[charl0ttan]

theyre going to kill me because nobody in history has acted strangely and im the very first

[levourdalak]

I dreamt that there was a new meme that went, “If I dids it, I dids it. If I didsn’t, I didsn’t.” There was a third line, but I forgot what it was.

[nifeandaccurate]

happy to report i’m back on my bullshit

and a rare variant

[levourdalak]

HOW DID YOU KNOW THEY WERE CAT MEMES IN MY DREAM

[nifeandaccurate]

>:3€

[levourdalak]

THAT’S IT, THAT’S THE MEME FROM MY DREAM

[moveslikekeithrichards]

ending every fully botched sentence with "thats my sentence i hope u liked it"

[assaultmystic-archive]

sometimes you see with sudden clarity that you are a transsexual doing drugs in her room alone on a thursday and comprehend the sheer extent to which your parents would be horrified by the course of your life and how funny that is and it does genuinely make it a little easier

[kushblazer666]

the people who responded “joe” and “biden” are operating a higher level than anyone else. they can see the matrix

[treecitysessions]

[kosmogrl]

I'm like if a girl had the urge to scream and break something all the time but stays quiet instead

[sioltach]

Ummmm sometimes you dread the weight of your life and other times it is an early morning in april and there are 5 species of birds singing and also the sun is shining through the baby leaves. Btw

[frengerino]

whenever i'm trying to talk myself out of buying something i don't need i always hear my old russian professor's voice echoing in my head: "WHAT??? WILL YOU DIE THE RICHEST MAN IN THE GRAVEYARD?" and then i make an unwise financial decision

[junglejim4322]

I’m like if someone smart chose to be an idiot. Out of free will

[papayajuan2019]

theyre pinning my wings to a cork board tomorrow

[chromaticabrasions]

have we tried substance abuse my liege